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(Independent)   Private hospital in London has twice as many caesarian births than normal. Officials became suspicious when they saw staff coming and going via a window instead of the door   ( news.independent.co.uk) divider line
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43 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Apr 2003 at 8:15 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

43 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-04-02 07:02:38 AM  
Gee slow news day?
2003-04-02 07:03:42 AM  
Hey doc, here's a $20. Can you "cinch the saddle" a little anyway?
2003-04-02 08:18:56 AM  
thats an old steven wright joke
2003-04-02 08:19:17 AM  
Steven Wright would be proud.
2003-04-02 08:20:51 AM  
*picks up New England Journal of Medicine*

Now *THATS* funny!!
2003-04-02 08:22:33 AM  
2003-04-02 08:30:42 AM  
Insert Dr. Nick Riviera picture here since my HTML coding never seems to work in the forums.
2003-04-02 08:31:25 AM  
Steven Wright Yes but still funny.
2003-04-02 08:32:32 AM  
As regards this story, I look forward to a hasty 'Can't find that article. Tastes like chicken.'
2003-04-02 08:32:49 AM  
Were any of these found in the back alley?
2003-04-02 08:34:02 AM  
2003-04-02 08:35:54 AM  
that's "mr. dog" births now. they've changed it back.

/marketing dept. of rome
2003-04-02 08:36:04 AM  
[image from mediaservice.photoisland.com too old to be available]

2003-04-02 08:36:57 AM  
[image from atnhangers.com too old to be available]
2003-04-02 08:38:50 AM  

you must be from somewhere outside north america.

steven wright is master of all things stand up comedy.

/seinfeld whimpers
2003-04-02 08:40:32 AM  
Dennis Leary? Whimpers also?
2003-04-02 08:42:07 AM  
Caesarean section = the segment of a given population that prefers leafy greens as opposed to iceberg lettuce

/got nothin'
2003-04-02 08:43:05 AM  
that's "mr. dog" births now. they've changed it back.

[image from pet-rr.com too old to be available]

/marketing dept. of rome

my first image vanished for some reason
2003-04-02 08:46:06 AM  
Dennis Leary? Whimpers also?

actually, bill hicks rulz the skool!!111

btw, anyone wanting loads of bill hicks, i have around 20 hours of stuff his stuff (albums and rare live shows, MP3s) shared out on kazaalite.
2003-04-02 08:49:08 AM  
I liked Hicks a lot, but Steven Wright absolutely gets my vote. I've had some serious rib-farkage listening to his shows. Billy Connelly in his prime was pretty damn good too.
2003-04-02 08:50:56 AM  
Major Major went through a window, maybe he was a C-section baby too.
2003-04-02 08:52:34 AM  
2003-04-02 08:54:39 AM  

i walked right by billy connelly on fifth ave in new york city last spring. he was in town doing a show the weekend i was there. he had his goatee dyed purple. i about fell over. saw him on BBC america on parkinson a week or so later and he still had the purple goatee, so i knew it was him. it was really cool. man he is short.

big yin!!!
2003-04-02 08:58:18 AM  
so did Eddie Murphy in "Beverly Hills Cop".

ok, nowhere near as literary as your reference, but still...
2003-04-02 08:59:58 AM  
Steven Wright is well known in the UK amongst the older stand-up comedy lovers.

AFAIK in the UK a lot of private health schemes, in particular those run by companies for staff, do not fully cover maternity costs, so it seems logical that regular births will be done on the National Health Service whereas any caesarians would be considered an "operation" and therefore qualify for private health cover.

Basically a non-story.
2003-04-02 09:17:08 AM  
sorry billy, it's conn^O^lly.

my bad...spelling.
2003-04-02 09:21:56 AM  
What I want to know is just what Bill Hicks would be saying these days if he were here to voice his opinion about current events. I'm sure he's ranting from wherever he's at, I just wish we could hear it....
2003-04-02 09:28:33 AM  
2003-04-02 09:41:39 AM  
Don't be bored! Can't we turn this into a burnination thingy? All the pinko-Marxist bureaucrat control freaks who wanna squash every last morsel of freedom out of the private sector with specious innuendo about a private hospital's apparent ability to serve up desired procedures faster than their government stalags, line up over there.

All the health-care raping money-whore capitalist swine who want to turn the world into a giant for-profit soylent green factory, line up over here.

Now, let's play DODGE-BALL!!!!!!
2003-04-02 09:44:19 AM  
Cosimo: I think that's pretty close to what Bill Hicks would say...good call.
2003-04-02 09:55:28 AM  

has t3h 'i55u3z'.


any-1 w/.5 8r4|n n0z:

trogdor = burnination


burnination = i hate this guy

/got nothin' again
2003-04-02 10:07:10 AM  
Jeez.. am I the only one who reads the gossip channels round here?

Celebs are going for caesarians because having the little feller (or lady) whipped out a few weeks early can have a big impact on recovery of original body shape.
2003-04-02 10:12:34 AM  
Bwahahahaha! Funny headline.

I have four kids -- two C-section and two natural. Let me tell you, C-sections suck. The only reason to have a C-section is because either you or the baby is going to die.

Anybody ever tells you that C-sections are less painful than regular delivery, you send them to me and I will slice open their belly, pull out their intestines, rinse them off with a saline solution, stuff everything back in, sew up seven layers of tissue and then staple the skin with a staple gun from Home Depot. Then I'll ask them how they're feeling.
2003-04-02 10:40:18 AM  
There's actually a term for it: TPTP- "Too posh to push"
2003-04-02 10:47:06 AM  
I think this has something to do with that farking liability insurance again. If a woman delivers naturally,and her kid is too short, gets diarrhea, won't eat, his IQ is ten points too low, or his head is a little squished, the woman sues the hospital claiming that something happened during the delivery. C-sections are actually more medically risky, but then you can't blame the doctors for defects in the child as easily.

I had two C-sections, but they were necessary. These women getting scheduled C-sections makes me sick. Probably the same women who put the kid in daycare when he's a week old and go back to their career. Yeah, Brisvegas--too posh to push. "Oh, am I going to have stretch marks?? Maybe I shouldn't have a kid."
2003-04-02 11:00:42 AM  
What a silly article. The Portland is where extremely rich women go to have their babies, and rich women don't like pain so what they do is they make an appointment ahead of time, and voila, their baby is born at their convenience. It's the same in the States and every other country that has rich people willing to pay for special services.

Of course, the Portland is also infamous for killing patients because they don't actually have any necessary supplies. They're being sued by several widowers, I believe.
2003-04-02 11:08:40 AM  
"The hospital is a favourite among celebrities, with Victoria Beckham, Elizabeth Hurley and Claudia Schiffer among those who have given birth there."

If ever I was going to become a male-nurse, this would be the reason. Can I get a hell yeah?
2003-04-02 11:28:44 AM  
Caesarean section = Area of the senate reserved for the supporters of Caesar.
2003-04-02 12:46:05 PM  
2003-04-02 01:34:49 PM  
Me fail english? That's unpossible!
2003-04-02 02:30:20 PM  
Whoa- I need to do a residency there.
2003-04-02 02:45:02 PM  
Macduff surrenders.

/english nerd
2003-04-02 04:54:53 PM  
I thought this said they had twice as many caucasian births. Heh.
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