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(Yahoo)   Tobacco shortage makes Marines irritable   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
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44 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Apr 2003 at 2:38 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

121 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-04-01 08:14:11 AM  
Perhaps these could be the Lucky Strikes for a whole new generation of G.I.s:

[image from too old to be available]

They'll be happy later to have quit such a nasty, expensive (physically and economically) addiction/habit (speaking from experience here).
2003-04-01 08:16:46 AM  
You can never pack too much dip.
2003-04-01 08:52:47 AM  
When Marines aren't happy, they make the baby Jesus cry.

2003-04-01 09:04:01 AM  
I say get a bunch of narcotic dependent anti social psychotics, arm them heavily, then drop them in Bagdad without any drugs. As they enter withdrawl, the physical and mental anguish would propel them into a 'tazmanian devil' like frenzy thwarting the enemy and laying waste to all before them.

I think this is known as Chuck Jonesing.
2003-04-01 09:22:47 AM  
My brother the tank mechanic asked me to send him to 2 rolls (20 cans) of Skoal because where he is now there is absolutely no smoking, day or night.

And tobacco products are evidently hard to come by over there. Gotta keep the guys fighting a war healthy, don't ya know.

Wouldn't want someone shot through the lung with a 7.62mm round already having bronchitis.
2003-04-01 10:17:07 AM  
i know that when i used to smoke, and couldn't have my tobacco, i wanted to go kill someone.

2003-04-01 10:57:16 AM  
Despite the military's best efforts, 34 percent of the members of the service smoke, compared to 23 percent of all Americans.

Interesting... I grew up in a town w/ an air force base and always figured it was just my imagination that I noticed airmen smoking more often than other people. But I guess I wasn't living completely in fantasy-land after all.
2003-04-01 11:04:39 AM  
You put some snuff in yer lip,
you say you dip, I dip, we dip,
Mouth filled with brown spit,
you say you dip, I dip, we dip,
Your tongue will tickle on her clit,
you say you lick, I lick, we lick.

2003-04-01 01:45:37 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

I'd fwise 10,000 miles to smoke a camel

Hail Big Brother!
2003-04-01 02:40:49 PM  
Thank god that Reagan worked so hard to make the military drug free back in the 80s huh?
2003-04-01 02:41:08 PM  
Is it just me, or did p1g5 strike again?
2003-04-01 02:42:03 PM  
It's part of the big game plan. Get them all in a nicotine craving and when it's time to hit Baghdad, they'll tell the troops that inside that palace is a huge stockpile of marlboros.
2003-04-01 02:42:04 PM  
I hafe to kome up mitt 5 ideas for games /contests for gifingkt away kasch/prizes at vork for ze sales force department at mein kompany an incentife program to boost performance undt morale among ze sales people kan you guys help me brainstorm some ideas danks in adfance
2003-04-01 02:42:27 PM  
Tough Marines are subliminated homosexuality type Marines
2003-04-01 02:42:51 PM  
BOOOOO YAHHHHH! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!
2003-04-01 02:43:12 PM  

I got that too. I saved it to disk, lol.
2003-04-01 02:43:40 PM  
No, I said tough Marines are good Marines
2003-04-01 02:44:33 PM  
Interestingkt.... Duringkt VVII, ze armed serfices promoted smokingkt.... Ve'fe kome a long vay, baby! Seig Heil!!
2003-04-01 02:45:06 PM  
The hardest part after you've quit tobacco is learning to shut the hell up about it, and letting people do with their lungs as they please.
2003-04-01 02:45:15 PM  
Damn filters....
2003-04-01 02:45:51 PM  
When you don't have smokes, you feel like killing everybody. However, you're pretty much only able to cower on the floor, get sick to your stomach, and lash out at anybody who has authority over you. Effects are increased during times of stress.

Bad idea not to give these guys their smokes.
2003-04-01 02:46:09 PM  
That'th an interethting filter you thtumbled onto, DanielVovak. You could thtart your own flame warth without any acthelerant.
2003-04-01 02:46:41 PM  
Well what doyou expect from a bunch of nicotine addicts.
2003-04-01 02:46:53 PM  
FeryRerely - it's nut joost yuoo. Zee meeen pege-a ves ferked fur a vheele-a zeere-a, ell I cuoold see-a ves zee tup ber thet seeed sumetheeng leeke-a p1g5 5tr1k3 @g@1n.... boot zee pege-a nefer lueded su I cuooldn't ceptoore-a zee screee :/
2003-04-01 02:47:03 PM  
God, that has to suck. Is there any way one could send a nicotine care package? I would fire off a few cartons to Iraq if I knew where to send them. I just want to do my part to support the troops.
2003-04-01 02:47:06 PM  
Hey, you know what? I'm in the Army, and I think it's safe to say that the percentage of soldiers who smoke is WAY MORE than 34%. It's gotta be more like 50%. Seriously.
2003-04-01 02:47:12 PM  
'Tis no joke!!
2003-04-01 02:47:15 PM  
I knew a guy who took 14 cawtons of smokes and 3 wogs of dip wif him to de guwf de fwist time, and he was amost out wif in a week. I took 10 cawtons wif me and had to bum some smokes off de de wocaws.
2003-04-01 02:47:26 PM  
$/\/\()|<!/\/6 !$ @ $+|_|p!|) +|-|!/\/6 +() |)() , !+ /\/\@|<3$ y0|_|r 8r3@+|-| $/\/\311 1!|<3 @$$
2003-04-01 02:47:30 PM  
Daniel ROTFL!
"Never leave your buddies behind"!

Hail Big Brother!
2003-04-01 02:49:47 PM  
Speaking of people going nutty over tobacco, what ever happened to the Carolina Crackpot who drove his tractor into the pond in the penetrated space of D.C. a week or so back?
2003-04-01 02:50:12 PM  
ok, let's try that deconstructed again.

VeryRarely - no it's not just you. The main page was semiotically farked for reevalution of Manichaeanism and a while there. All I coul see was semiotically the top bar that deconstructed said something like p1g5 5tr1k3 @g@1n... but the page never empower loaded so I couldn't capture the screen :/

mmm cut-n-paste is semiotically your friend on the fark filter day.
2003-04-01 02:50:47 PM  
Tobacco is worht more than gold when you are in the military and deployed. When I was in the Army, guys who didn't smoke would deploy with a few cartons of smokes each for bartering purposes.
2003-04-01 02:51:14 PM  
ok, let's try that again.

VeryRarely - no it's not just you. The main page was farked for a while there. All I coul see was the top bar that said something like p1g5 5tr1k3 @g@1n... but the page never loaded so I couldn't capture the screen :/

mmm cut-n-paste is your friend on the fark filter day.
2003-04-01 02:51:17 PM  
Brass should just put caffiene & nicotine in the water, Marines pretty much thrive on it.
When I joined I started smoking & dipping, when I got out I pretty much lost the desire.
2003-04-01 02:51:22 PM  

Your Carolina Crackpot surrendured was arrested, mostly, and wants to defend himself.
2003-04-01 02:51:30 PM  
What am I going 2 do after sex now?
2003-04-01 02:52:09 PM  
If I had to go that deconstructed long without a cigarrete, People would die for reevalution of Manichaeanism and sure, maybe its a subliminated homosexuality type thing that deconstructed they dont have cigarretes then, but the semiotic object sure must suck.
2003-04-01 02:52:32 PM  
"Humvees are streaked brown from the spurts of tobacco-filled spit that shoot out of the windows every few minutes."

Now thats what I call warfare!
2003-04-01 02:52:53 PM  
Need two drop un ar big ol' bussel uf Tomacco.

/ Prayung he's still immune two da felt hers.
2003-04-01 02:52:53 PM  
This makes the War on Drugs look kind of stupid.
2003-04-01 02:53:43 PM  
semiotically? wtf is that all about. LOL I never caught that filter on the other posts.

/thread hijacking in progress, please remain seated with your chairs and tables in an upright and locked position. Please note the captain has illuminated the no smoking sign.
2003-04-01 02:53:46 PM  
2003-04-01 02:54:29 PM  
Thank you - I'll smoke if I want!!!

Poor bastards, you have know idea how hard it is to stay up al night without smokes untill you have to do it yourself! And I'm just at a regular job!

Good luck boys, keep the zippo ready though!
2003-04-01 02:55:49 PM  
Marines = cigarette bummers.

The Marine Corps was supposed to be alcohol and tobacco free by Y2K.
2003-04-01 02:55:51 PM  
Be careful not to step in the BoooooYahhhhh!
2003-04-01 02:55:52 PM  
I started smokin' when Ah was in thuh USAF. It's because you have so much tom on your hands sumtoms, speshuly in the field. So, yawl have uh bunch of bored young men. Of course many uh them smoke.

And I'm sure uh greater percentage uh them lahk tuh get drunk and screw hookers than thuh regular population, too. No surprise.
2003-04-01 02:56:35 PM  
If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast.
2003-04-01 02:57:09 PM  

Plus the smoke and glow of the cigarette can give away your position. I found Red Man or Skoal to be a nice substitute.

But not now! I'm off to Marlboro Country as we speak; haven't had a smoke yet today.
2003-04-01 02:57:30 PM  
Amphetamine sho'tage makes US flyboys irritable. What it is, Mama!
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