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(US Congress)   U.S. Government calls for citizens to pray and fast so God will help win the war   ( divider line
    More: Scary  
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227 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Mar 2003 at 10:36 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-03-27 11:33:48 AM  
This is starting to seem like both sides are paving the way for the beginning of the end of times. That being said, when does 'Armageddon Day' become a national holiday?
2003-03-27 11:34:18 AM  
Oh come on you goddamn pussies. This means nothing. You are in no way obligated to follow this shiat at all, so grow some thicker skin and let it roll off your back. I've been an atheist for 3 years now. You think I raise a shiat storm whenever some guy holds a communal prayer at a dinner table or pledges allegiance? No I just go along with it and smile politely.

If you don't believe in God, then you have no reason to be offended. In fact if you truly do not believe in God, then this is quite amusing, asking people to starve themselves and pray to their invisible all-merciful Hebrew skylord so that we can kill all the bad Iraqis.

And if you do happen to believe in God, then just replace all instances of "God" with "Santa Claus" and you'll understand how I see this situtation.
2003-03-27 11:34:47 AM  
God = Allah
2003-03-27 11:35:19 AM  
Dave_bsr: How exactly do you KNOW God is not on Saddam's side? I didn't get that memo
2003-03-27 11:35:43 AM  
"I believe in God. I KNOW he's not on Saddam's side."

You, sir, have gone off your meds
2003-03-27 11:36:57 AM  
My views on religion:


It began 2,000,000 years ago, when an alien being of tremendous power from beyond our universe chose Earth to be the seat of his grand expiriment. Upon reaching Earth, the alien sought out the most intelegent animal, in this case the early ancestors of modern man, and impanted within them a tiny sample of its own DNA. The apelings immediently evolved over night into homo sapiens. The alien's name was Yahweh, and his intentions were far from noble...
2003-03-27 11:37:24 AM  

This house resolution and indeed all christian encroachment into governmental affairs is a symptom of a much larger and more sinister problem. Guess what that is? YOU!, and all who believe that which is unsubstantiated factually, yet popular.

/stabs self in throat repeatedly
2003-03-27 11:37:27 AM  
I dunno about fasting, but if these fundi idiots weren't shoving gallons of purified black gold into the gaping maws of their SUVs constantly, we might not be having all of these problems...
2003-03-27 11:37:47 AM  
"...wants fruit from the Tress of Knowledge and Life..."

Eve already ate from the Tree of Knowledge. Best damn deal in the history of genetic tampering. Anyone read "Protecter" by Larry Niven? Mmmm, root of life.....*drool*
2003-03-27 11:38:12 AM  
03-27-03 11:34:18 AM Bbcrackmonkey
Oh come on you goddamn pussies. This means nothing. You are in no way obligated to follow this shiat at all, so grow some thicker skin and let it roll off your back.

My sentiments exactly. I'm not religious, but I'll take their holidays off and even celebrate some of them.

Can I get Hannukah and Ramadan off too?
2003-03-27 11:38:26 AM  
My God is the everlasting Sky. Your God lives beneath him.
2003-03-27 11:38:35 AM  
subgenius, emperorjay?
2003-03-27 11:38:45 AM  
Crackmonkey - you turned atheist 3 years ago? I didn't see your name in the newsletter. Anyway, welcome aboard, it's worth it for the deep Amway discounts if nothing else
2003-03-27 11:38:48 AM  
Wow Jackin, that's nice. What did we ever do to you?

*Steps away slowly*
2003-03-27 11:39:01 AM  
I would be more concerned if there was a penalty for not obeying this.
2003-03-27 11:39:23 AM  
"This is just a little proposed resolution that frankly, is for show. It won't go anywhere. And they get thoroughly trashed for it. Real nice."

They should be trashed for it. It's a complete waste of time, which in this case equals taxpayer's money. I don't need idiot representatives wasting my money for something they KNOW is "show". They want to climb on a soapbox and proclaim how religious they are, they can do it in church (like the rest of us) and off MY dime.
2003-03-27 11:40:04 AM  
there is no such thing as "church and state" being seperate.

now, on to the REAL text

"Recognizing the public need for fasting and prayer in order to secure the blessings and protection of Providence for the people of the United States and our Armed Forces during the conflict in Iraq and under the threat of terrorism at home."

"public" (everyone
fasting & prayer (no specific God mentioned)
secure blessings (freedom?)
protection **OF** providence (God's desire)
of the PEOPLE (not just Christians)
of the USA & ARMED FORCES (prayer for country and Americans)
during the conflict in Iraq (prayer for Troops)
and terrorism at home (PD, FD, and local military).

quit your crying you little girls....ignore it.

unlike Iraq, you are not woken up at 4am to pray to a god you are forced to believe in or die!!!!!

so shutup and be pround you have the freedom to speak out against your government!
2003-03-27 11:40:06 AM  
If there is a god I am sure he is disgusted with every last one of us on this planet.
2003-03-27 11:40:23 AM  
I just assumed that if there is some all-powerful being, then what is happening now is supposed to happen and it would be pointless to pray for it to be different.
2003-03-27 11:40:28 AM  
I can't believe that these are the people running the country. Doesn't the separation of church and state mean that there should be NO influence from ANY religion on the government? If these guys want to pray for the war, fine Just dont push it on us
2003-03-27 11:40:41 AM  
By the way, im not an atheist.
2003-03-27 11:40:58 AM  
"The alien's name was Yahweh, and his intentions were far from noble..."

You forget to mention his research assistant Lucifer...
2003-03-27 11:41:23 AM  
Best tag... ever.
2003-03-27 11:41:29 AM  
God is on all sides you dolts...doesn't matter what religion or non-religion you happen to follow.

[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-27 11:41:34 AM  
America: Dear God, please help us win this war.
God: No.
America: Why not?
God: Remember when my pal the Pope asked you to not go to war?
America: Of course, but our government is FAR more qualified to discern Your will than the Holy See!
2003-03-27 11:41:58 AM  
If you pray to a sky god that another human has told you about, you have already lost your mind to that human. They own you and your fragile mind.

Dang, Ironpoint, you're sounding a bit too much like Timecube guy there. Besides, we God doesn't live in the sky, he lives on the planet Kolob near the center of the galaxy. Right Ebawb?
2003-03-27 11:42:10 AM  

But there's a problem..."Jesus" is never mentioned (albeit that's exactly who they mean), only GOD. Granted, this alienates polytheistic faiths, as well as the non-religious, but sometimes you have to accept the things you cannot change (mmm..Catholic dogma).

I don't see "In God We Trust" being removed from our money anytime soon (all though E Pluribus Unum is sooo much cooler), or the end of casual references to a divine power by our legislative bodies. The majority of my taxes fund idiotic federal programs, not religion; I'm free to believe what I want, and that's good enough for me.
2003-03-27 11:42:20 AM  
Where's Bob Dobbs when you need him?
2003-03-27 11:42:44 AM  
Holy crap... the U.S. is totally farked up these days. I can see it now, my boss comes to tell me i can't take a lunch break today because it's a day of fasting and i tell him to kiss it. Then i'll sue the government, and the feds will come and lock me away for being un-American or some other BS.

The only thing that any 'God' needs to help this administration with/to is a heaping helping of STFU.
2003-03-27 11:43:30 AM  

given that providence is capitalized, it tends to read a little differently to me.

secure the blessings and protection of Providence.

That and the fact that is specifically says 'pray.'

so far as i know, Buddhists and Atheists nd scientologists (dont quote me on the scientologists) dont pray.
2003-03-27 11:43:45 AM  
Macman37: I wholeheartedly agree.

Dave_bsr: I don't know. I believe in God. I KNOW he's not on Saddam's side. besides the fact that we are trouncing him in the war, i mean. He's evil.

So... Bush is good?

And what the hell are fundies, dammit?
2003-03-27 11:43:51 AM  
03-27-03 10:49:14 AM Kaka
I will begin fasting just as soon as I finish off this plate of Freedom Fries...

LMAO i will do that also. This is so stupid, its unbelievable. Politicians are dumb (sp)
2003-03-27 11:44:06 AM  
Well if the government is going to endorse a religion, can't they at least pick one that doesn't have so many inconsistencies???
2003-03-27 11:44:24 AM  
"unlike Iraq, you are not woken up at 4am to pray to a god you are forced to believe in or die!!!!!"

Iraq is actually one of the few secular Middle Eastern countries. You aren't killed for not being Muslim there. As a matter of fact, there are Christian Arabs who live in the country. You can be killed for not liking Hussien, but not for being non-Muslim. Of course, once we (the US) destroy what little stabilization there is in the country, ethnic/religious/tribal fights WILL break out and THEN you could be killed for not being Christain/Muslim/Whatever.
2003-03-27 11:44:44 AM  
Athiest: Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there.
2003-03-27 11:45:19 AM  
Well well well... I guess I'll head down to my church, then: The local Bar & Grill. Eat steak, shoot pool, drink scotch, swear a lot, and scratch my balls if they itch. Man, I love the Church Of The Bar & Grill!

fark government mandated fasting and prayer. Get your asses back to work, you dolts!
2003-03-27 11:45:27 AM  
Tariq Aziz is a Christian as a matter of fact.
2003-03-27 11:45:30 AM  
There are no gods, no masters. That our elected leaders and the majority of the US population believe a)that an imaginary friend lives in the sky, and b)he is on our side, is just scary.
2003-03-27 11:45:49 AM  

ever hear of deism?
2003-03-27 11:45:55 AM  
Moestooge This country was founded on religious principles?
Where the preamble declares, that coercion is a departure from the plan of the holy author of our religion, an amendment was proposed by inserting "Jesus Christ," so that it would read "A departure from the plan of Jesus Christ, the holy author of our religion;" the insertion was rejected by the great majority, in proof that they meant to comprehend, within the mantle of its protection, the Jew and the Gentile, the Christian and Mohammedan, the Hindoo and Infidel of every denomination.

-Thomas Jefferson, Autobiography, in reference to the Virginia Act for Religious Freedom
"As the government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian Religion.." Treaty of Tripoli, Section 11
2003-03-27 11:46:34 AM  
What if I get hungry?
2003-03-27 11:47:08 AM  
Emperor Jay, you are actually Psycho-Jay, are you not? Your theories are quite imaginative.

Hey all complainers. Where are you when December 25th rolls around? I'll bet you celebrate Christmas just like everyone else does, and I bet that you take a few days off work to do it. I don't see anyone going bat shiat over school closings and days off work to celebrate the numerous religious holidays we have.
2003-03-27 11:47:15 AM  
And what the hell are fundies, dammit?

Why, fundies are underwear meant for 2 people.
Hours (or more precisely, minutes) of endless entertainment.
2003-03-27 11:47:32 AM  
Mlah...that was so not even close to anything that vaguely resembles humor. If you found that from somewhere and thought "boy, I"ll post this on Fark" you're an idiot. If you made that shiat up yourself, then I would like nothing more than to shove a hot iron up your ass.
You don't have to agree with the war but I'm so sick of asshats like you who continually try to compare W. to Hitler or bin Laden! Shut the fark up!
2003-03-27 11:47:47 AM  
"Athiest: Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there."

Doesn't mean it is, either.
2003-03-27 11:48:41 AM  
Wil_has_a_posse : Thank you for the link. I've been looking for something exactly like that.
2003-03-27 11:48:52 AM  
Man, I sure think Dubya is like Hitler and Bin Laden. Nah, They're smarter than he is. Definitely smarter.
2003-03-27 11:49:13 AM  
Baph will save us!
[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-27 11:49:22 AM  
Did anyone else breathe a sigh of relief when they found that one of their reps wasn't on the co-sponsor list?

Me. Of course, my Rep is Patrick Kennedy, and Ted would probably come down 95 and eat his progeny if he threw his support behind this. Prayer is fine by me, whomever you pray to, but I think you should be praying for the safe return of our soldiers and the survival of Iraqi citizens. Not the deaths of anyone.
2003-03-27 11:49:27 AM  
where's Bevets when you really need him?
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