FARK.com: (4731260) Winning eight grand slams isn't normal. On METH it is

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		Winning eight grand slams isn't normal. On METH it is (news.com.au)		81
		More: Dumbass, Andre Agassi, grand slams, tennis, FYI, singles, media relations, romance, AFP

• • •

3862 clicks; posted to Sports » on 28 Oct 2009 at 1:30 AM (13 years ago) | Favorite | share:

81 Comments (+0 »)

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SinPoker

2009-10-28 1:32:46 AM

I wish I came up with this headline.

T-Luv

2009-10-28 1:33:16 AM

Well this debunks all the negative things people say about meth.

/Don't do meth kids, otherwise you will be an extremely successful pro tennis player...
//Sheeple

The Bestest

2009-10-28 1:35:46 AM

SinPoker: I wish I came up with this headline.

Sadly, I don't get it

T-Luv

2009-10-28 1:39:06 AM

The Bestest: SinPoker: I wish I came up with this headline.

Sadly, I don't get it

homarjr

2009-10-28 1:39:22 AM

I don't know how or why, but this makes me like him more.

The Bestest

2009-10-28 1:41:33 AM

T-Luv:

Ah thanks
the more I know..

Kid Mojo

2009-10-28 2:14:57 AM

Now this is a t-shirt.

IMDWalrus

2009-10-28 2:29:28 AM

The Bestest: SinPoker: I wish I came up with this headline.

Sadly, I don't get it

ON METH you would.

IMDWalrus

2009-10-28 2:31:20 AM

IMDWalrus: The Bestest: SinPoker: I wish I came up with this headline.

Sadly, I don't get it

ON METH you would.

/I don't get it either
//Fark ate my slashies

Aernis

2009-10-28 2:34:52 AM

Yup, cuz that meth gave him the raw athletic talent needed to win.

homarjr

2009-10-28 2:36:12 AM

Kid Mojo: Now this is a t-shirt.

I'd like it better without the tag.

ohdoublereally

2009-10-28 2:59:52 AM

Well, that explains the mullet.

ADHD Librarian

2009-10-28 3:31:25 AM

Hey, amphetamines really helped my rugby, so I'm getting a kick.
Not that I was doing ice with Andre, I got dexies for my ADHD and for the first few weeks I had to take it every day (including weekends). I suddenly found I had skill.

/not on dexies these days though
//still a better player than I was pre drugs
///never in any danger of going pro

Britney Spear's Speculum

2009-10-28 3:51:50 AM

T-Luv: Sadly, I don't get it

It's from this billboard PSA:

culebra

2009-10-28 3:57:35 AM

ADHD Librarian

2009-10-28 5:18:44 AM

Not to mention pink tights under denim shorts?
/WTF dude
//should have been obvious he was doing something

cantsleep

2009-10-28 5:22:17 AM

homarjr: I don't know how or why, but this makes me like him more.

I don't know, I kind of admire it. Unless someone thinks he's doing it for the $$$, there is no reason I can think of to come clean on this. Other than writing an honest autobiography.

suebhoney

2009-10-28 6:05:11 AM

Bah! I'm just as disappointed at this news as I was when Capriati got caught smoking pot and put her out of the game, and when Hingis got caught doing cocaine and put her out of the game. At least Agassi is already out and retired.

Again, bah!

SgtPorkchop

2009-10-28 6:28:37 AM

For a second i thought "oooh free breakfast at Denny's"

AuralArgument

2009-10-28 6:29:11 AM

suebhoney: Again, bah!

I think this would have been more damaging to tennis then those two no offense (offensive statement forthcoming)but until the Williams sisters came along no one gave a fark about woman's tennis (at least in the mainstream)

OtherLittleGuy

2009-10-28 6:51:00 AM

T-Luv: The Bestest: SinPoker: I wish I came up with this headline.

Sadly, I don't get it

I thought it was another play on words, but Subby gets my +1.

THAT is how you do Well Played.

DeadZone

2009-10-28 6:54:31 AM

Skail

2009-10-28 7:10:04 AM

Remember, kids: Winners don't do drugs.

huntley

2009-10-28 7:38:38 AM

Add this to the "Hulk Hogan - I almost killed myself" book tease as a way to sell more of your autobiography once it is released.

That_Dude

2009-10-28 7:52:02 AM

Subby and DeadZone are awesome.

Dr Volta's Electric Fish

2009-10-28 7:56:34 AM

Why would I want to win 8 of these?

With marijuana, 8 of these would be an appetizer.

MugzyBrown

2009-10-28 8:05:29 AM

T-Luv: Well this debunks all the negative things people say about meth.

/Don't do meth kids, otherwise you will be an extremely successful pro tennis player...
//Sheeple

He sucked during the period he says he was on Meth.

/idiot

Gardan's_Steelyard

2009-10-28 8:11:14 AM

Which begs the question, what IS the appropriate price to charge for sex?

T-Boy

2009-10-28 8:36:48 AM

That 15 bucks for sex ad makes it all look like a darn good deal. That chick might get my 15 bucks. The skanky toothless chick in the parking lot of the grocery store asking for money to go across town to buy medicine for her sick child in the hospital gets 5 bucks to just get the fark away from me.

OtherLittleGuy

2009-10-28 8:44:53 AM

Gardan's_Steelyard: Which begs the question, what IS the appropriate price to charge for sex?

With or without prenup?

macadamnut

2009-10-28 9:03:13 AM

You'd think he could afford some coke.

Mateorocks

2009-10-28 9:15:55 AM

Brooke Shields drove him to it, obviously.

star_topology

2009-10-28 9:23:26 AM

Why this revelation shocked me, I have no idea.

excedrin

2009-10-28 9:30:10 AM

Gardan's_Steelyard: Which begs the question, what IS the appropriate price to charge for sex?

I just you just became my hero.

/Yes, I have low standards
//Apparently meth does that to a person

Crudbucket

2009-10-28 9:46:32 AM

alexdroog

2009-10-28 10:05:59 AM

What have you got to say now, Mr. Sessions?

KJM315

2009-10-28 10:11:31 AM

alexdroog: What have you got to say now, Mr. Sessions?

I mean technically if he was on from 1997 to 1999, he didn't win any grand slams and if i recall only won one major.

Magorn

2009-10-28 10:16:46 AM

suebhoney: Bah! I'm just as disappointed at this news as I was when Capriati got caught smoking pot and put her out of the game, and when Hingis got caught doing cocaine and put her out of the game. At least Agassi is already out and retired.

Again, bah!

I do find it strange that:

A) Tennis apparently classifies meth as a "recreational" drug not a "performance enhancing" one so the suspension was only going to be 3 months not two years

B) Agassi got out of the positive drug test with the "it was an accident, I accidentally drank a spiked soda belonging to my assistant who is a total tweaker" excuse*

* and that another male player had gotten out of a positive cocaine test with the excuse that it was on the lips of some skank he was kissing ina nightclub

Neurobiologist

2009-10-28 10:20:07 AM

T-Luv: Well this debunks all the negative things people say about meth.

/Don't do meth kids, otherwise you will be an extremely successful pro tennis player...
//Sheeple

Meth is an example of a drug that's best deterrent would be simply explaining to people what it does biologically (not to mention show those time-lapse pictures, but I digress). That and the danger it puts those who make it and those who stumble upon the crystal meth process and its byproducts.

Meth and Ecstasy are the bad ones from neurobio standpoint. Have fun with the rest of them if you want, just avoid those two.

Flame away, I guess.

macadamnut

2009-10-28 10:29:09 AM

Neurobiologist: Meth and Ecstasy are the bad ones from neurobio standpoint. Have fun with the rest of them if you want, just avoid those two.

Cocaine is really not good for your nervous system or your liver, and heroin has the overdose thing. I would add those to the list.

Wasilla Hillbilly

2009-10-28 10:29:09 AM

Neurobiologist: T-Luv: Well this debunks all the negative things people say about meth.

/Don't do meth kids, otherwise you will be an extremely successful pro tennis player...
//Sheeple

Meth is an example of a drug that's best deterrent would be simply explaining to people what it does biologically (not to mention show those time-lapse pictures, but I digress). That and the danger it puts those who make it and those who stumble upon the crystal meth process and its byproducts.

Meth and Ecstasy are the bad ones from neurobio standpoint. Have fun with the rest of them if you want, just avoid those two.

Flame away, I guess.

That might work if you can convince them never to try it in the first place, but once you've had a taste, it can be quite compelling and damage be damned.

I haven't touched meth in over 10 years, but I did it fairly often in college, and, interestingly, it did wonders for my tennis game. It is 100% a performance enhancer. You should have seen the aces.

tricycleracer

2009-10-28 10:48:39 AM

[image from memeparty.com too old to be available]

boxster

2009-10-28 10:52:47 AM

From the book excerpt, it sounds like he did it once, got caught, and managed to get out of it by claiming it was unintentional.

Considering that tennis players are tested for drugs pretty much non-stop, I doubt he was still doing meth when he was winning grand slams. If he had been, he more than likely would have gotten banned.

lacydog

2009-10-28 10:55:17 AM

Not even once campaign, for those not in the loop.

/the picking for bugs one is really gross

puckhead

2009-10-28 11:11:07 AM

Was going to submit as 'Game, Set, Meth'.
Because i had nothing.

Magorn

2009-10-28 11:16:40 AM

My mother the nurse used to say that the most dangeous drug to abuse of all was Alcohol. among her patients, chronic drug users, even of the hard stuff like herion and Coke, generally got better and healthier as they recovered from thier addictions; Chronic alcholics, by and large had completely WRECKED their internal organs often to the point of no return.

I'm curious what your take on the dangers of Ex is. I don't touch the stuff personally, but i'd read of it as a very promising treatment for PTSD and I'm curious what the side effects might be and whether they outwieghthe benefits

Rann Xerox

2009-10-28 11:51:25 AM

DeadZone rules.

MugzyBrown

2009-10-28 11:58:26 AM

Magorn: My mother the nurse used to say that the most dangeous drug to abuse of all was Alcohol. among her patients, chronic drug users, even of the hard stuff like herion and Coke, generally got better and healthier as they recovered from thier addictions; Chronic alcholics, by and large had completely WRECKED their internal organs often to the point of no return.

Probably because you can go heavy on alcohol for 20-30 years before it starts to really become a serious physical problem.

jaytanz

2009-10-28 12:04:02 PM

E makes you happy by causing a chemical imbalance in your brain (specifically it overloads your brain on serotonin), and one well known side effect is being depressed the day after taking it because the chemical imbalance swings the other way.

Take it too frequently and you basically don't give your brain time to recover, your always short of serotonin and probably depressed. E farks with your head, but if you can use it in a controlled fashion (i.e. infrequently) its really not that bad.

Wikipedia explains it more scientifically, but that's the gist.

Neurobiologist

2009-10-28 12:07:01 PM

Magorn:I'm curious what your take on the dangers of Ex is. I don't touch the stuff personally, but i'd read of it as a very promising treatment for PTSD and I'm curious what the side effects might be and whether they outwieghthe benefits

MDMA runs some of the serotonin transporters backwards, instead of removing serotonin from the synaptic cleft, these transporters are phosphorylated and begin to dump serotonin into the synapse. This appears to cause very significant neurotoxic damage, to the point of damaging the serotonergic system irreversibly even after a single dose.

One specific striking piece of research is on the effects of a single dose of MDMA on the serotonergic neurons in monkeys. Even out to 17 years, there is a marked reduction in these neurons. The moral is that when you kill these cells off as can be done with a single dose of MDMA, they are not coming back.

When these data are presented to a class of students, there is usually (much more in the past) a feeling that everyone is paying attention since X has been (less so now) considered a "light" recreational drug on par with pot. I am not nearly as familiar with the newer research looking into the effects on PTSD, though I would caution that the dose is something to be considered when talking about the adverse effects of any drug. Give a search in pubmed for MDMA if you want more primary research.

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