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(Washington Post)   Man teaches squirrels, ponies and armadillos to water ski (with pic)   ( washingtonpost.com) divider line
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9229 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2003 at 3:14 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-03-07 11:19:14 AM  
...and I quote, "Nothing restores your faith in humanity like a water-skiing squirrel."

2003-03-07 11:32:38 AM  
Big deal. I heard Richard Gere trained a hamster to retrieve digested corn.
2003-03-07 11:46:31 AM  
[image from media.washingtonpost.com too old to be available]
2003-03-07 11:51:40 AM  
Big deal. I saw Nutsack Squirrel on the X Games
2003-03-07 12:02:52 PM  
B.S. He teaches them not to fall off that little thing that skis by itself. wtf-ever.
2003-03-07 12:18:59 PM  
Bump, new twist on an old classic. Funny.

But don't poke fun of such a valuable ministry. Billy Graham might one day be saved from drowning because of Twiggy's water safety lessons. And that part about how our Blessed Lord encouraged her to continue with shows after her husband died touched me deeply. /dabs tears
2003-03-07 12:38:50 PM  
Twiggy the Water-Skiing Squirrel
-- 1996
© 1996 Joe Mettenbrink

When I went to the Douglas County Fair,
There much to my surprise,
There was a little squirrel skiing on water skiis -
Right there before my eyes!
She is a cute little squirrel who loves to ski
Behind a little boat in a pool,
And she loves to be petted, and she loves to swim,
And you know she never went to school!

Her name is Twiggy the Water-Skiing Squirrel,
Twiggy the Water-Skiing Squirrel,
Riding on skis behind a little boat,
Going 'round in the wading pool!
She's Twiggy, the Water-Skiing Squirrel,
Yes,Twiggy The Water-Skiing Squirrel!
And she loves to have fun on water skis,
She's a fun seeking, water skiing, squirrel!

[image from capitalboatshow.com too old to be available]

2003-03-07 02:25:43 PM  
Sorry folks 'bout that big arse pic. As you can see I was highly entertained by this squirrel.
2003-03-07 02:53:28 PM  
I once had a pet squirrel named George. I would love him and pet him and squeeze him and keep him for my very own....

George don't move no more.
2003-03-07 03:17:33 PM  
This man has way too much time on his hands.
2003-03-07 03:20:15 PM  
Bump: I left you a gift at the bottom of the leif Garrett thread....
2003-03-07 03:20:18 PM  
this is so 1994,
i remember going to boat shows with my dad and twiggy the waterskiing squirrel was always there.
it's still cool as hell though.
2003-03-07 03:21:14 PM  
Those dog riding monkeys are cooler.
2003-03-07 03:21:41 PM  
where do ppl find the time to accomplish this crap??
2003-03-07 03:21:46 PM  
That made me smile. Yay, Twiggy!
2003-03-07 03:22:45 PM  
I am FAR too busy to be trifled with squirrels with normal sized genitalia!

(not really)
2003-03-07 03:23:08 PM  
save Billy Graham?

Please don't. No really, don't.
2003-03-07 03:23:15 PM  
Yeah well I could to the same thing with a tranquilizer dart and a tube of plastic cement, AND it wouldn't take two years either.
2003-03-07 03:24:24 PM  
Best animal I ever saw in any sport :

[image from eagle-sports.com too old to be available]

2003-03-07 03:24:45 PM  
"Nothing restores your faith in humanity like a water-skiing squirrel."

How suicidal must you be if that's the only thing that will pull you out of your doldrums?
2003-03-07 03:26:42 PM  
New Cliche? please no
2003-03-07 03:27:36 PM  
Gee...I hope PETA doesn't catch wind of this thread or we'll all be charged with aggrivated comedy involving a helpless animal forced to do unnatural acts for purposes of entertainment...
2003-03-07 03:28:14 PM  
This article suddenly gave me a flashback to the early 80s when I realized that I had indeed seen the original Twiggy at a boat show when I was about five or six in Kansas City. It was the coolest freaking thing I'd ever seen, outside of Godzilla week on TV.
2003-03-07 03:29:26 PM  
2003-03-07 03:31:25 PM  
I think it's fake. That squirrel doesn't have the balls.
2003-03-07 03:32:49 PM  
Pffft. That's nothing.

[image from capitalboatshow.com too old to be available]
2003-03-07 03:33:35 PM  
Check this out!

[image from fantasticola.co.uk too old to be available]
2003-03-07 03:34:16 PM  
fark me, I can't do anything right.
2003-03-07 03:36:36 PM  
Oh, Billy Graham isn't so bad. Back in the 80's, my brother was hitchhiking from New Orleans to Virginia and caught a ride with him in his limo. My brother chatted with him for a while, told him his sob story and then Billy Graham drove him to the airport and bought him a plane ticket for the rest of the way.

True story, although it's much funnier when my insane brother tells it.
2003-03-07 03:36:56 PM  
Best sits in a recliner and reveals the secret of training a squirrel to water-ski. "It's kinda like training a husband," she says. "You have to give them a lot of love and affection and tell them the same thing over and over again."

Hey lady, don't forget the part about taking their nuts away from time to time.
2003-03-07 03:37:18 PM  
No that's funny.
2003-03-07 03:37:21 PM  
geeze........yes this a cool article, and yes, there is a conspiracy to keep me from posting anything evar at Fark....i am so 5 minutes ago.
2003-03-07 03:47:14 PM  
Best sits in a recliner and reveals the secret of training a squirrel to water-ski. "It's kinda like training a husband," she says. "You have to give them a lot of love and affection and tell them the same thing over and over again."

It was her husband, the late Chuck Best, who trained the first Twiggy.

2003-03-07 03:49:22 PM  
I hadn't thought through the logic of it, but when I first licked the link, I was expecting a full-sized boat at full speed with a little critter skiing behind...
2003-03-07 04:19:12 PM  
I like the squirrel.
2003-03-07 04:21:32 PM  
Farking hysterical.
2003-03-07 04:23:09 PM  
The guy on a crusade to teach pets to waterski died saving grandpa from drowning. No irony there.
2003-03-07 04:23:55 PM  
Glad to see the rodent has the sense to wear a life jacket.
2003-03-07 04:33:46 PM  
betcha it's easier to teach an armadillo to water ski than
it is to teach a west indian how to snow ski.
(please, no offense at all intended- I do it all the time and they're always laughing, and always stay with it until they can't do it anymore- never seen such determination to try that hard from anyone else...)
2003-03-07 04:56:15 PM  
I'm from Goa India, and I can't ski worse a shiat. I can snowboard rather well though.

India - 1
Amarillo's - 0
2003-03-07 05:19:36 PM  
It's part of a secret government military project, I tells you. Amphibious assault rodents will redefine warfare.
2003-03-07 05:39:06 PM  
It took me all day on Tahoe to try to learn to waterski/wakeboard... by the end of the day I couldn't even hold onto the rope anymore, my wrists were so sore, and I hadn't been able to stand up yet. I couldn't even squeeze a shampoo bottle (had to place it against the wall in the shower and lean against it).

And this farking squirrel can do it?!

At least Yuk-Monkey's comment makes me feel a bit better.
2003-03-07 05:56:52 PM  
in other news, man teaches pigs to hang glide.
2003-03-07 06:03:37 PM  
Squirrels are spawns of satan.
2003-03-07 06:14:02 PM  
One time...I was driving under a power line with a squirrel skittering across it. He fell, bounced on my hood, up on the roof, slid down the back glass and landed on the ground and darted off like a pigme on fire.
2003-03-07 06:35:43 PM  
YIKES... I was born and raised in Sanford, FL (smallish town ~30k people). Quite obviously Twiggy was rather famous around town, and I've lost track of the times I've seen the little sucker, but I certainly never expected to be confronted with such a reminder of my past on Fark.

On second thought, this is EXACTLY where I would expect to be reminded such a thing. I used to go rollerskating at the skating rink the Best's owned probably once a week in elementary school. The building is still there, though long ago was converted into some other commercial business.
2003-03-07 06:49:21 PM  
Does anyone have the pic of the squirrel/chimpunk hitting the bowl? Can you post it? Puhleeeeeease? Thanks!
2003-03-07 07:34:13 PM  
Venus: gotta come out with us this summer- we ski instructors teach wakeboarding and waterskiing during the
summer- to all friends who ask. usually we can get someone
up on their second or third try on doubles- the wakeboard
takes a little longer. it also depends on whether you roller
skate or ride a skateboard. skating dynamics translate real
well to waterskis, skateboarding translates well to a wakeboard. and it works every time! you do, however, have to
put up with three ski instructors telling you what to do at
the same time (solution: yell "shut up!")
the best hint I can give is this- on doubles, keep your
arms straight. when you pull out the slack in the rope by
bending your arms, the boat will pull it taut, and pull you
over forward. we used to teach our skiers on the dock- give
them the ski rope and lean them out over the water. if the
arms bend, we let go,and you splash. crude but it works...
best of luck next time!

Bluezmasta: More power to ya! do what feels comfortable and
keep practicing!
2003-03-07 10:09:45 PM  
Lim-Dul-1342 - grew up in Sanford myself (SHS'88). Are you sure the Melody Skating Rink is still there? I thought they leveled it for the new beltway.

Man, I just don't understand the fascination with this squirrel! I remember when Twiggy #1 was on 'Real People' (or was it 'That's Incredible'?) back in the early 80s. This story never dies! Chuck and his squirrels do, but the story won't.
2003-03-07 10:57:11 PM  
OK - so Chuck got Twiggy #1 back in 1978. In 2003, we are on Twiggy #5 - one Twiggy every 5 years. According to this website, the average life span of a squirrel in captivity is 15 years. Sounds like part of the story is missing here. How many squirrels drowned unnecessarily? Sounds like a case for PETA!
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