Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(iWon)   "American Idol" contestant charged with assault. Unfortunately, didn't clean Simon's clock   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
•       •       •

16629 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2003 at 12:15 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

101 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-03-06 10:07:39 AM  
He should learn to curb his anger.

Side comment: I don't know why everyone is always trashing Simon. I think he's simply taking emotional coddling out of the equation and speaks the truth.

The music business is hard and cold - he's just taking the band aid off in one quick motion unlike Paula Abdule (sp) who babies everyone. Personally, I prefer his approach (not his opinion some times tho.)
2003-03-06 12:17:11 PM  
What's up with all the iWon links?
2003-03-06 12:19:18 PM  
American Idol(and all "reality" programming) is definately one of the signs of the Apocylypse

"I have a suggestion to keep you all occupied....learn to swim"
2003-03-06 12:20:16 PM  
"I didn't 'feel' that punch. This is a bar fight, you really have to want it... "
2003-03-06 12:20:18 PM  
I agree with Bump, regardless of Simon being mean he knows what he's talking about. The popular view of Simon has completely marginalized his opinion.
2003-03-06 12:20:28 PM  
I charge ALL 'Amercian Idol" contestants with assault. Citizen's Arrest! Citizen's Arrest!

/love to barney fife
2003-03-06 12:20:32 PM  
Fox's screening process for these (pseudo)reality shows leaves much to be desired.
2003-03-06 12:20:42 PM  
Man what the hell is up with people getting punched in the face and falling over and hitting there heads..

Christ doesn't anyone know how to take a punch anymore..
2003-03-06 12:21:03 PM  
KO'd and killed, by an American Idol hopefull. Is there anything more embarrasing? It's like being beaten up by Richard Simmons.
2003-03-06 12:21:49 PM  
If he is convicted and sent to prison, he will be a contestant in the reality show, "Buba's American Biatch".
2003-03-06 12:21:58 PM  
I like Simon. He really knows his business.
2003-03-06 12:22:58 PM  
Jaered N. Andrews, 24, of Austintown, Ohio

Jaered? Jaeaeaeaered? Jaeaeaeaeaeaeeaaeeeaerraararraad?
2003-03-06 12:23:10 PM  
It appears his real talent lay in boxing.
2003-03-06 12:24:30 PM  
Shame on all of you for watching Reality TV. You killed Family Guy and Futurama. Original programming and creative writing is going down the crapper to make way for "Who wants to be a survivalist for America's Millionaire celebrities?"

Fark all of you in the mouth (that watch Reality TV, that is)
2003-03-06 12:24:47 PM  
it was only a matter of time before this show had someone with skeletons in the closet.
2003-03-06 12:25:30 PM  
Amen Flyinglemur AMEN!!!!!
2003-03-06 12:25:52 PM  
My ex-wife, my daughter's mother, just married a British guy named Simon that she met online a few days ago (I mean, she met him a few days ago, then married him) who has a history of assault. I'm so happy for her I could shiat my pants.
2003-03-06 12:26:20 PM  
Simon may not be liked by everyone, but his opinion sure as hell is respected by the singers. When he tells them they had a bad performance, they know it was a bad performance. When he tells them they had a good performance, they light up because getting that out of Simon means it was really good. No one cares what Paula says, because she never says anything bad. IMHO, Paula Abdul represents the pussification of America. We need more Simon's in this world that tell it like it is, instead of a bunch of "yes-men" like Paula.

2003-03-06 12:26:27 PM  
Yes... clean his clock indeed...
2003-03-06 12:27:08 PM  
to all the people saying Simon just tells people the truth: There's a difference between telling the unmitigated truth and being a complete dick about telling the truth. ie: "you need to lose weight, everything else is fine"
2003-03-06 12:27:08 PM  
Oh yeah, and Family Guy was the best show on the planet.
2003-03-06 12:28:00 PM  
So if your going to punch someone you want to make sure they die right now instead of lying in a coma for nine years then dying. This guy gets 5000.00 dollars bail and the guy from the coma thread gets 250,000.00 dollars bail. Gotta love consistancy.
2003-03-06 12:28:12 PM  
um, was this the "party" guy that threatened the little gay kid for being a kiss ass? If so, I'm not surprised.
um, no I don't watch this crap. *pssht*
2003-03-06 12:29:12 PM  
BUTTCHEESE: you sir, are an ass
2003-03-06 12:29:24 PM  
American Idol" contestant charged with assault. Unfortunately, didn't clean Simon's clock.

Amen! Every time I see Simon, I want to kick his ass. I don't understand people's fascination with watching some guy treat other people like crap. Sure, he's a critic and he's supposed to be honest, but he's just a dick. Just like that stupid British woman, I forget her name, the one that hosts "Weakest Link." It is possible to be truthful with someone without ripping their self-esteem apart.
2003-03-06 12:29:27 PM  
Flyinglemur: That's not an offer, is it? :-*
2003-03-06 12:31:14 PM  
Simon is usually right, but he is a bit cruel. It's not as if he's even clever about it either.

Back to the topic, does anyone have a picture of this Jaered?
2003-03-06 12:31:22 PM  
you're kidding yourself if you think that American Idol is only about singing talent. it's about image, and Simon knows this. "you need to lose weight" may be harsh, but it is probably in the best interest of the singer if she wants to succeed.
2003-03-06 12:31:39 PM  
Is this "Hit your head on a sidewalk" day at Fark?
2003-03-06 12:32:24 PM  
Joey JoJo Junior Shabadoo: That's the worst name I ever heard. ;-)

I agree. It's amusing for bit but then it's just shrill and annoying.
2003-03-06 12:33:48 PM  
Bps300: what about the big fat guy? Who, I might add, made it with a Karen Carpenter song.
2003-03-06 12:35:02 PM  
Ummm i thought manslaughter was the appropriate charge if someone dies during an act of violence or negligence where the intent wasn't to kill the person. Either we're not getting a complete story or the dead guys family is getting the short end of justic with just a assault charge.
2003-03-06 12:36:01 PM  
Did he look like this guy??
[image from too old to be available]
2003-03-06 12:36:45 PM  
Why wouldn't you put a pic of the guy? It just makes no sense.
2003-03-06 12:37:18 PM  
I like when Simon gets yelled at by a crappy ass singer after he (Simon) tells them they suck.

I only watched that show in the beginning when they all sucked, for the humor factor.
2003-03-06 12:37:21 PM  
Is this "Hit your head on a sidewalk" day at Fark?

2003-03-06 12:37:37 PM  
unfortunately, there's a double standard when it comes to male and female singers. in today's pop music, are there any chubby female? i'm not totally into the pop scene, but i would bet the answer would be 'no'. skinny women sell records, fat ones don't. it sucks, but that's the business.
2003-03-06 12:39:22 PM  
From what I understand of American Idol, they bring people into successive rounds, who don't deserve to be there, for the express purpose of having Simon shoot them down on camera.
2003-03-06 12:39:43 PM  
The fat comment was completely out of line imo...

It has nothing to do with how well you sing.
2003-03-06 12:39:51 PM  
Femme_fatale: I'm guessing it was that guy. Aryan, Blondish dude who got all red in the face because his non-party partner was "giving him the eye" or something. I remember he made it to the semis and then never appeared again.
2003-03-06 12:39:54 PM  
Bps300: okay, what about Frenchie then, she was a good deal larger than the girl he told to lose weight. and yes, there are a couple of chubby girls, but they are a minority.
2003-03-06 12:40:29 PM  
Smoking Gun's got the picture. But I don't recognize him. BTW, reality TV isn't so bad. It's a nice break from all of the crappy 30-minute family sitcoms with the wacky next door neighbor. Or the 30-minute friends sitcoms with the wacky next door neighbor. Or the 30-minute office sitcoms with the wacky next door cubicle neighbor. And reality tv didn't kill off Futurama and The Family Guy, FOX's crappy schedule and marketing did. They couldn't keep a good show on the air if they tried (which they don't).
2003-03-06 12:41:01 PM  
Shortly before the fight


2003-03-06 12:41:56 PM  
i think i figured it all out!

1) get punched in the face
2) hit head on sidewalk and die
3) profit!!!
2003-03-06 12:43:09 PM  
ToeKutter: that's damn funny.
2003-03-06 12:43:54 PM  
The problem with Ms. Oliverez (sp?)--the one who was told she was fat--is that she didn't fit into any of our culture's body categories. The fat dude doesn't get any flack because as Simon said on the radio 'he is what he is,' which means we know that he fits into the jolly fat man image that we're comfortable with. The girl who got told she needed to lose weight was neither fat nor skinny, so she slipped through the cracks.
2003-03-06 12:44:48 PM  
Everytime I see anything like American Idol its always someone singing Aretha Franklin or Al Green.

Why not do some Weezer or Sonic Youth?
2003-03-06 12:44:50 PM  
frenchie was cool in that she could transcend her fatness. she had an Aretha quality where her voice demanded attention and made you focus on the voice, not the looks. Looks and talent are two parts of the equation - increase one, and the other is not that important. the girl simon told to lose weight couldn't command with her voice as well, therefore to be successful she must 'improve' her looks.

if by other chubby girls you are referring to Kelly Osbourne, she's got family star status, and no matter what she sung or how she looked, she would sell somehting. however, IMHO, she's just a flash in the pan. the music business is formulaic and the formula has proven successful.
2003-03-06 12:44:53 PM  
Someone post a picture of this dude.
2003-03-06 12:45:22 PM  
New photoshop contest: Photoshop people who you would like to see fall, hit their heads on the sidewalk, and die.
Displayed 50 of 101 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.