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(BBSpot)   Man hopes Episode III doesn't ruin his childhood   ( bbspot.com) divider line
    More: Satire  
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12570 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Feb 2003 at 12:45 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

196 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-02-20 10:45:20 AM  
Yep, we all know that movies ruin your childhood just as much as Priests playing with your genetals...

Farking dork
2003-02-20 02:43:23 PM  
Scottish_Allah - Perhaps you missed the satire tag? Granted it's not very good satire, but the person you're calling a dork probably doesn't even exist.
2003-02-20 04:39:44 PM  
oh i dont know, i think this move might ruin some childhoods. hmm, what is the plural of childhood. childhead...nope...hmmm. i digress.
2003-02-20 06:29:19 PM  
childrenhood? hmm, probably not.
2003-02-20 07:02:08 PM  
My childhood was ruined when they had Greedo shoot first.

In all seriousness, I grew up watching Star Wars, reading the books (which I still read), collecting the toys, comics, games, etc. Christ, I even have Star Wars tattoos. Simply put, the Star Wars universe has been a very big part of my life and I would hate to see such a great series slide down the path of suck.

Don't get me wrong. I'll still go and see Ep III and any other Star Wars movie that comes out. I would go and see it even if it was Episode III: Jar-Jar and the Ewoks. I just hope it isn't that bad.

Flame away.
2003-02-20 08:02:38 PM  
Well I used to respect Lucas before Ep II
2003-02-20 08:21:43 PM  
Lance Hymer, 31, like many of Generation X, is eagerly awaiting the final chapter of the Star Wars saga, and like the rest he's worried that Episode III may ruin his childhood.

But He is however, looking foward to puberty.
2003-02-20 11:53:51 PM  
Take your pick, Episode I and II were both better than the original trilogy combined. Mark Hamill was the biggest whiner ever. Far more annoying than Jar-Jar could ever hope to be.
2003-02-21 12:48:05 AM  
quick before the link disappears!~!!
2003-02-21 12:49:58 AM  
Troll says what?
2003-02-21 12:50:33 AM  
Episodes I and II ruined what little interest I had in that series. First it was some dumb little kid, then he grows up to be an angry antisocial malcontent teen. Not to mention plotholes out the wazoo.
2003-02-21 12:51:17 AM  
Well, you know something, little basement-dwellin' dudes, I should seriously be considered for the role of Grando Calrissian.
2003-02-21 12:53:07 AM  
Star Wars? I've never understood how Farkers seem to hate all commercial manufactured garbage yet rave over this stuff like its some work of art. The 1st one was reasonably entertaining, but the toy sales that followed meant $$$ was the only motivation from then on.

/flame on
2003-02-21 12:53:13 AM  
"a Jar Jar/ewok love scene"

I think I'm going to cry.
2003-02-21 12:54:00 AM  
Not one of their better attempts.
2003-02-21 12:55:03 AM  
It's a tr- oh... nevermind...
2003-02-21 12:56:43 AM  
This was NOT funny

Ok let me go read it now...
2003-02-21 12:57:50 AM  
fark Star Wars and fark George Lucas.
Yeah, I thought Star Wars was the shiat when I was eleven. Now George Lucas has turned it in to such a huge pile of crap, I don't see how it holds anyone's interest.
2003-02-21 12:58:09 AM  
Beam me up, dead man.
2003-02-21 12:59:28 AM  
I enjoy the occasional wookie.
2003-02-21 12:59:46 AM  
Anyone here remember Clerks, when they talk about "Jedi" vs. "Empire" and they discuss the fate of the workers repairing the Death Star?
Just thought I'd bring up a Clerks reference.
2003-02-21 01:00:10 AM  
France scares me. Not a flame, just a comment.
Nothing to see here...This is not the post you are looking for, move on.
*waves ninja-juda-jedi hand atcha*
2003-02-21 01:00:11 AM  
I watched Ep I and II. Ah, it was ok.

Could have been better if they had taken the time to build a story instead of cramming it all into the obligatory 2hrs. If they could make Titanic so frikkin' long, they could have made Ep I and II longer just to help the story out.
Do that and also get someone who could act. Who was the guy? Christensen?? or something?, sheesh! Wooden like Pinnochio!
2003-02-21 01:01:40 AM  
For me it was the stupid midichlorians. That killed star wars for me.

Oh, and Yoda fighting like Sonic the Hedgehog on crack.
2003-02-21 01:03:07 AM  
Oh, and the greatest romantic speech of all time, courtesy of Anakin Skywalker...

"I don't like sand. It's rough and coarse. Not like you. You are soft and smooth."

Shoot me now.
2003-02-21 01:04:25 AM  
In addition to the original trilogy and the currently unfinished pre-trilogy, George also has Ep.7, 8 and 9 as well.
2003-02-21 01:04:26 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

"There comes a time when I feel like I hit a wall and that is when I do stupid things"
2003-02-21 01:04:28 AM  
Edhellen, here's the full scene:

2003-02-21 01:05:13 AM  
I have a friend who is a die-hard sci-fi and fantasy fan. He'll defend Star Wars to the death. He refuses to admit how weak I and II were, so I don't press him on it.
2003-02-21 01:06:32 AM  
The first SW (ep4) was cool because it was original. The second movie sucked because it didn't have an ending -- it just had this big "to be continued" when it was done. Very unrewarding. But they made up for it with third movie. However, when they announced ep1 then began the 'in your face' mass merchandising almost 2 years before the movie was released, well I was so sick of seeing anything SW that I blew off the movie. I finally did see it when someone brought a copy of it over on video tape. I was glad that I didn't spend $7.00 bucks to see it. Eesh. What a stinker. I especially got sick of seeing Anikin's face plastered everywhere. I would pay money to see Anikin stuffed down a plasma vent, cooked, then fed to a heard of rabid Ewoks.

The first movies had interesting characters and a storyline. The new movies just suck. There's nothing really new other than improved special effects.
2003-02-21 01:07:46 AM  
France - I think I speak for a lot of us when I say that we'd like to see some pictures of your Star Wars tattoos.
2003-02-21 01:08:01 AM  
Obvious img src
2003-02-21 01:08:16 AM  
I think eps 7, 8, and 9 are just books, though. I believe they're in a series called "The Adventures of Luke Skywalker" or something like that.
2003-02-21 01:08:25 AM  
star wars tatoo picture already provided!

talk about fast service
2003-02-21 01:10:56 AM  

I was too scared to ask.
2003-02-21 01:12:03 AM  
I think eps 7, 8, and 9 are just books

not even that - no one knows what they'd be about really. many have speculated that they'd be based on the zahn trilogy, but no one is sure. whatever the case, if lucas wanted to do 7,8,9 now he'd have to do it with han and leia's kids, since the principle actors fromt eh original trilogy are so damned old that they can't do anything that takes place within 20 years of 4,5,6

2003-02-21 01:12:04 AM  
I don't get how anyone could care about Star Wars after episode I. What a pile of crap.
2003-02-21 01:12:58 AM  
I'm not that big a Star Wars fan so I wouldn't know the particular details of Ep. 7, 8 and 9. Maybe they are just books now.

Read that excert from Clerks....
reminds me of the first tiem I saw Empire. I was working for a day care place and they took all the little tykes out to see the movie. I was in high-school and was grinning cause I got to go for free! But just when Luke and Darth are having their light sabre duel, I got to take one of the kid ot the bathroom!! D'oh! Missed the entire fight! When I get back, Luke's already lost a hand and is hanging off the Cloud City antenna!
2003-02-21 01:14:16 AM  
the zahn trilogy was excellently written. after that lucas sold out to third-rate star trek "novelists" like Kevin J. Anderson. The Zahn books are the only readable ones in the entire star wars collection, and when i was younger i read over 40 of the star wars books, so i can say that definitively.
2003-02-21 01:16:18 AM  
2003-02-21 01:17:15 AM  
farking hilarious. good stuff. time for bed.
2003-02-21 01:20:15 AM  
Lollygaggers - nice profile pic! I read about that sign in "You Gotta Have Wa" (really good/funny book), but I'd never seen it before -- thanks!
2003-02-21 01:20:41 AM  
"What if the Jedi turn out to the bad guys? What if there really is no 'force?' It could alter my reality in an awful way."

The Force does exsist? If that was the case then I would start to choke some of my farking bosses with my mind!
2003-02-21 01:20:42 AM  
Zahn's and Shadows of the Empire are the only books I liked, the newest stuff is just crap.
2003-02-21 01:23:13 AM  
kevin j. anderson was the worst. and not just for star wars... he killed dune when brian herbert sold out on his dad's legacy and let the worst young-adult trash "author" in the world write the dune prequels.
2003-02-21 01:24:08 AM  
Nice job!
2003-02-21 01:25:15 AM  
*shrug* I like 'em. Yes, Episode I was a little childish but Episode II made up for it by being darker. I think it's a solid story by genre standards, executed pretty well. It's better than those farking midgets and gay wizards prancing around in that other franchise anyway.

And what plot holes?
2003-02-21 01:25:25 AM  
2003-02-21 01:26:15 AM  
"farking midgets and gay wizards prancing around in that other franchise anyway."

You mean the ones in the matrix?

/pathetic attempt at humor
2003-02-21 01:26:18 AM  
This is getting way too deep for my limited Star Wars knowledge. I am a sage of all things Middle-Earth, though.
Of course, that's not the topic at hand so I'll just shut up.
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