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Cuddling sharks, Egyptian weenectomies and the Gayest Place on Earth: Headlines of the Week 5/31 to 6/6
Posted by Drew at 2009-06-08 2:44:36 PM (28 comments) | Permalink
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Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2009-05-31 to Sat 2009-06-06:
Egyptian man cuts off own penis. Osirisly
"You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel"
Some guy in California who had 13 expensive rabbits just reported to police he had 77 rabbits stolen. Thief spotted in truck with 200 rabbits. Police hope to recover the 42,987 rabbits by tomorrow
North Korea begins assembling a long range rocket in their attempts to further map the local seabed
Controversial topless coffee shop goes tits up
Harvard to offer endowed professorship in gay studies, which doesn't mean what you think it means
Thousands of chickens die in fire. Firefighters struggle to control flames, appetites
Tourette's most common in white kids, boys, c**ks**kers
Oregon teen struck by lightning, immediately grounded
Police search for rocket man responsible for launching 7 ft long civilian-made rockets that buzzed two Continental airlines planes in the skies over Houston sometime around zero hour 9:00 AM
"Gay Days" at Disneyworld expected to bring in $100 million. A hundred million sweaty, buff, tan, oiled up, leather-wearing dollars
Just as the Yankees get their Wang fixed, the Mets break their Putz
Amanda Hubbard of Georgia wins three gold medals at U.S. National Weightlifting Championships. I told you her snatch was impressive
The demolition of Tiger Stadium was halted by a judge Friday. Plans are to let it fall apart naturally, like the rest of Detroit
Sharks can be "cuddled like Dolphins", according to Dr Stumpy McStumperson from the institute of really bad ideas
Newsweek: American obesity jumps in last year. But not very high
Antioxidants in human sperm reduce facial wrinkles. Here comes the science, it's coming, oh yes get ready it's coming
Cox and Arquette set to make "Scream 4: Career Death Rattle"
Amy Winehouse wants "black kids" which would really match her liver
Kwai Chang Came
Toner, ex-aide to Eisenhower and Nixon, dies, will be shaken and reinserted to work a few more days
Al Gore given License to Il
New Gallup poll reveals Cheney is more popular than Pelosi, much in the same way that prostate exams are more popular than colonoscopies
Scott Weiland's estranged wife to publish tell-all memoir, marking the first time a heroine will abuse him
Whitney Houston's new album to hit the streets in September, expected to crack the top 10
Kelly Clarkson isn't fazed by fat jokes, vegetables
Bausch & Lomb settles 600 eye-fungus lawsuits for $250 million. After attorneys fees are paid, plaintiffs aren't expecting to see much
General Motors claims it has 16 potential buyers for Saturn. It is unclear if that's for the actual cars or the brand itself
France's unemployment rate at all time high, or as the French call it, "summer vacation"
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