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(AZCentral)   AZCentral.com's Losers of the Week   ( azcentral.com) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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13042 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2003 at 1:01 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

103 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-02-07 04:50:30 PM  
I like. Nice sarcasm. Good point about the difference beteen Love and use mere mortals. Nice rip on Bratney.
2003-02-07 07:17:51 PM  
Where is Drew on this? He is now officially old/loser.

Bah, I'm older.

Duke sucks, so I have been told.
2003-02-08 12:08:58 AM  
This guy has talent. Hope he gets wider press.
2003-02-08 01:04:46 AM  
rather uninspired really, i mean damn, who can't make fun of Courtney Love and Metallica?
2003-02-08 01:05:50 AM  
[image from azcentral.com too old to be available]
Wow what a farking crack whore
2003-02-08 01:06:53 AM  
Yeah, Metallica does suck. They need to be touring with Yanni, Kenny G, and Enya.
2003-02-08 01:06:56 AM  
2003-02-08 01:08:05 AM  
Hey! Why wasn't I on the list?
2003-02-08 01:09:40 AM  
I really really hate Metallica. The sad thing is that a lot of people talk about how they suck, but still buy all their albums and their $70+ tickets
2003-02-08 01:10:42 AM  
I like this guys style. Kinda dry, sarcastic, and in your face. This is a quote from an old one that I just thought was to priceless...

DaimlerChrysler is dumping Martha Stewart in favor of Celine Dion, in a move that's comparable to the difference between shooting yourself in the face with a machine gun and shooting yourself in the face with a differently colored machine gun.

"Actually," Chrysler spokesman James Kenyon should have said, "it's much more Shakespearean than that. You know how at the end of Romeo and Juliet, after Romeo drinks the poison, and then Juliet wakes up, and then she stabs herself in the chest with a dagger? We decided to go with the dagger."
2003-02-08 01:11:59 AM  
Check out the author's name.
Justin Doom.

I'd pay to have that name.
2003-02-08 01:12:48 AM  
Hmm... Ace_Lightning didn't make the list. Or did he?
2003-02-08 01:12:56 AM  
a better name would be Justin Time

yeah i'm a dork what of it?
2003-02-08 01:13:49 AM  
i know a Justin Time...he's got odd parents
2003-02-08 01:14:22 AM  
"Sure is a good thing I married Kurt," Love might've whispered under her breath, licking her lips and wistfully dreaming of soon devouring her hotel mini bar. "I mean, he was a musical genius, really well known, and without him, no one would know who I am, including most of my immediate family."

That crack you just heard was the sound of Courtney Love getting the smeared lipstick slapped off her face.

Justin Doom, what a cool farking name.
2003-02-08 01:14:30 AM  
"Hahahahahahahahaha," Pepsi officials would've said, if they weren't rolling around on the floor, convulsing, all but choking on their laughter. "He... wants... (more laughter) a $5 million charitable contribution... to the... (even more laughter) Ludacris Foundation... we'd just as soon give the money to The Human Fund."

"Hahahahahahahahaha," says i.
2003-02-08 01:16:46 AM  
Pretty clever young Grasshopper.
2003-02-08 01:18:01 AM  
GIS for "loser of the week"
[image from bobfromaccounting.com too old to be available]
2003-02-08 01:19:40 AM  
And another...
[image from bobfromaccounting.com too old to be available]
2003-02-08 01:20:27 AM  
Russell Simmons should be boycotted for being an assclown.
2003-02-08 01:21:11 AM  
OK, one more.
[image from bobfromaccounting.com too old to be available]
2003-02-08 01:25:01 AM  
fark follow-up:


The nationstates game gets fun 2morrow.
2003-02-08 01:25:30 AM  
I kind of agree with Russel Simmons on the pepsi thing.
2003-02-08 01:27:32 AM  

[image from news.bbc.co.uk too old to be available]

Can you say "Crackwhore"?

(Sarlac could! =)

2003-02-08 01:30:20 AM  
Why didn't the author put his own name on the list?

I was with him on the Courtney Love and wanted to be with him on Metallica. But c'mon, Limp Bizkit aside, I can think of alot worse bands than the Deftones, Mudvayne, and Linkin Park. For starters : Metallica.

And why is Russell Simmons a loser for pointing out the hypocrisy of axing Ludacris and then going out and hiring Ozzy? The only reason they dumped Ludacris was because of O'Reilly's biatchin' and the subsequent biatchin' from his mindless followers. They even admitted that it was a mistake to do so. The author doesn't even give any real reasons for why Simmons is wrong. He only points out that Pepsi won't be affected by the boycott. Maybe so, but that doesn't make the guy a loser.
2003-02-08 01:31:49 AM  
doom[nospam-﹫-backwards]l­artne­cza*c­om just sounds damn cool
2003-02-08 01:32:54 AM  
Maximusverus: well stated (on russell and pepsi)
2003-02-08 01:32:55 AM  
hehe... I really have to start reading this column regularly!
2003-02-08 01:32:57 AM  
I have a pretty good idea whose gonna be the Loser Next Week.

[image from koenighaus.net too old to be available]
2003-02-08 01:34:56 AM  
Well, as this 'doom' fellow said, Pepsi is only interested in its bottom line.

Time for Simmons to admit, if only to himself, that his goals in life are no loftier.

Heck, I laughed out loud when I heard about the $5 million demand for the aptly-named "Ludakris Fund" (sp?).
2003-02-08 01:35:50 AM  
Nice recall on the 'Human Fund'.
2003-02-08 01:35:57 AM  
He is such a biatch!
2003-02-08 01:37:18 AM  
mmm pepsi
2003-02-08 01:37:24 AM  
Pepsi sucks. Drink Coke.
2003-02-08 01:39:08 AM  
"Limp Bizkit, in true Limp Bizkit fashion, named its second and most assuredly awful CD "Lessismore," "

Second CD?
2003-02-08 01:41:49 AM  
I thought Limp Bizkit had broken up, or was that a dream? A beautiful, wonderful dream.
2003-02-08 01:43:09 AM  
pepsi and coke suck. drink dr. pepper
2003-02-08 01:43:44 AM  
well to clarify I don't think Pepsi should pay any money to any charity either.
2003-02-08 01:44:23 AM  
Heres another bit this guy wrote. He's pretty funny.

Britney and her posse have chatted loudly and used their cell phones during films, and actually walked out of Robert Downey Jr.'s The Singing Detective 45 minutes after it started.

"The official line is, we had our schedules mixed up, so we had to leave, but I didn't like the movie," Spears told a New York Post spy. "Sundance is weird. The movies are weird - you actually have to think about them when you watch them."

Yes, she actually said that, as every sentient creature on Earth stepped back, shook its head plaintively and let out a long, slow, deep sigh.
2003-02-08 01:44:47 AM  
Where the hell did the name "Limp Bizkit" come from? Wait... I just remembered that I don't care. I'm way too busy listening to good music.
2003-02-08 01:45:35 AM  
i drink whatever is freely available to me

which means i drink pepsi

actually given the choice i think i'd take pepsi anyway, coke is....coke is too red
2003-02-08 01:45:53 AM  
Yeah you kind of lose credibility when you call it Limp Bizkit's 2nd CD. Even if you are only writing a burn piece.
2003-02-08 01:50:16 AM  
I was always trying to defend Metallica, but that summer tour just tore through my denial. Limp Bizkit and Linkin Park? How the mighty have fallen. I think I'm gonna cry. But why are the Deftones on that tour? They are a credible band.
2003-02-08 01:51:30 AM  
true. I don't like Mudvayne or Linkin Park, but the Deftones rock. I also agree with you on the Russell Simmons thing. But hey, at least Pepsi didn't hire Kelly Osbourne.
Oh yeah, all soft drinks suck, drink water.
2003-02-08 01:52:20 AM  
[image from bbc.co.uk too old to be available]
Cornelius says: "Even though a whole lot of Americans do not listen to me, i'd much rather continue to put out great music then to go on tour with any of those wretched bands"
2003-02-08 01:52:48 AM  
One more vote in favor of the Deftones. And I'm too old to like "nu metal". So they aren't.
2003-02-08 02:00:05 AM  
Why are the Deftones touring with a bunch of LOSERS?
2003-02-08 02:00:46 AM  
Halah "And another..."
I read that geek chicks bio a while back. She seems pretty cool.

Great, another courtney posting. She truly has to be the worlds most disgusting famous Ho.
2003-02-08 02:04:11 AM  
Metallica is a suckhole band. They haven't been good since the 'Justice' days. On that tour, there was NO opening act. (Least not when I saw em.)

Drink Beer
2003-02-08 02:05:19 AM  
Deftones and Mudvayne are good, old Metallica is amazing. Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit suck.
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