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(Fox News)   News media confirm they have surrounded Captain Phillip's house and are holding his wife hostage, will accept interview as ransom   (onthescene.blogs.foxnews.com) divider line
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5974 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Apr 2009 at 2:13 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



72 Comments     (+0 »)


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Outtaphase [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 11:06:17 AM  
"I have a very brief statement from Mrs. Phillips. She has decided she does not want to make a statement now... until this is resolved, and would like you to respect her privacy. She has stated she would like you off of her premises and away from her house by tomorrow morning."

"Could you be more specific?" I asked. "You mean the entire area? She doesn't want any media anywhere near her house?"

At this point, I'm not sure if I could have held the restraint and poise of the spokesperson. Low threshold for stupid, I guess.
 
PacersJAM3s
2009-04-10 11:16:55 AM  
There have been some extremely good headlines lately.

I would like to give you an online high-five, submitter.
 
Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 11:28:47 AM  
Very nice headline, subby.

Also a nice example of why it should be legal to shoot anybody who steps on your property if he or she has been issued one clear warning previously and chooses to ignore it.
 
Adjective Bird Whiskey
2009-04-10 11:33:40 AM  
She didn't say anything about not going through her trash.
 
MaxxLarge
2009-04-10 11:39:32 AM  
I don't think a courtroom in the world would convict her if she came out on the porch and just started taking random BB gun pot-shots at them and their equipment. Come to think of it, even using a real gun would probably result in at least a hung jury.

F*cking vultures have never heard the word "shame", and I hope karma rapes them all up their filthy dirt-stars.
 
gorgor
2009-04-10 11:41:09 AM  
They just need a little Coke and some Captain in them.
 
tonesskin
2009-04-10 12:59:12 PM  
Look, the news media is responsible for getting the story. Freedom of the press. This woman should be arrested for violating their rights!
 
Diogenes [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 1:17:31 PM  
I say bring out the hoses. Hoses that spray piranhas like in that Simpsons Halloween episode.
 
CitizenTed
2009-04-10 2:10:39 PM  
The press is hoping the captain is murdered so they can broadcast his wife's tears. TV "news" is nothing more than clothesline gossip for retarded people. They want the emotional angle and don't give a crap about things like context, research and enlightenment.

At NAB few years ago, I met a California anchorwoman. Over drinks, we discussed the state of TV news. I decried the "crying survivor" aspect of TV reporting. She felt that this stuff was actually important, that it helps viewers understand the story better somehow. Needless to say, she didn't join me later in my room.
 
RedPartyPenguins
2009-04-10 2:18:40 PM  
gorgor: They just need a little Coke and some Captain in them.

*snert*
 
Raging Thespian
2009-04-10 2:18:51 PM  

CitizenTed: Needless to say, she didn't join me later in my room.


Well obviously. You're not an attractive rich guy.
 
farkreader007
2009-04-10 2:19:08 PM  
[image from joeknowscorvettes.com too old to be available]
Captain Phil?
 
satanicsantoku
2009-04-10 2:21:08 PM  
jesus, how shameless can you get? next step: murdering people just so they can film their loved ones pained, heaving sobs of grief. NEXT ON FOX! WRENCHING EMOTIONAL PAIN followed by Glenn Beck
 
wademh [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 2:22:32 PM  
waiting for the holey than thou section of reporters to pick up on this and camp out to show the horror of those camped out, to be reported on by [see recursion]
 
MDGeist
2009-04-10 2:22:35 PM  
"He thanked us and left and we will of course do exactly as the family has asked."

Yea and I'm sure they'll do that..
 
Cornwell
2009-04-10 2:22:43 PM  
"In order to make this operation run smoothly, we will invite you in one by one, and kindly ask you to leave via the back door after your 30 minute exclusive interview.

Please don't mind the truck from "Soylent Green Inc." waiting in the driveway, that would be the truck of my cousin, who is here to help me through these troubling times."
 
Torchsong
2009-04-10 2:24:40 PM  
Farkers, WHERE are the Bonnie Bedelia pictures from DIE HARD?

Seriously disappointed in you people...

/Too lazy to hotlink it myself
//Trying to get disability for "being tired" like that guy in the article above this one
 
vudukungfu [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 2:24:53 PM  
Had to come to a complete halt on my drive home last night due to the media jerks camped out on my commute.
They need a good slap.
 
VanillaTang
2009-04-10 2:25:35 PM  
Mrs. Phillips, this calls for street justice.

upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size


/careful, it's hot
 
Felix_T_Cat
2009-04-10 2:26:38 PM  

Torchsong: Farkers, WHERE are the Bonnie Bedelia pictures from DIE HARD?

Seriously disappointed in you people...


WRONG! Where are the Bonnie Bedelia pictures from Needful Things?
 
Latinwolf [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 2:27:04 PM  

Outtaphase: "I have a very brief statement from Mrs. Phillips. She has decided she does not want to make a statement now... until this is resolved, and would like you to respect her privacy. She has stated she would like you off of her premises and away from her house by tomorrow morning."

"Could you be more specific?" I asked. "You mean the entire area? She doesn't want any media anywhere near her house?"

At this point, I'm not sure if I could have held the restraint and poise of the spokesperson. Low threshold for stupid, I guess.


This is how it should have went:
Reporter: She understands the world is concerned?
Her spokesperson: Yes, she understands you vultures are looking for a story.
 
factoryconnection
2009-04-10 2:31:29 PM  

Latinwolf: This is how it should have went:
Reporter: She understands the world is concerned?
Her spokesperson: Yes, she understands you vultures are looking for a story.


And she'd like to add something for your research department, only four letters: G, T, F, and O.
 
DeathByGeekSquad
2009-04-10 2:35:18 PM  

satanicsantoku: jesus, how shameless can you get? next step: murdering people just so they can film their loved ones pained, heaving sobs of grief. NEXT ON FOX! WRENCHING EMOTIONAL PAIN followed by Glenn Beck


Now -that- would be an interesting thriller in this age of Hollywood suck.
 
AbbeySomeone
2009-04-10 2:35:55 PM  

factoryconnection: Latinwolf: This is how it should have went:
Reporter: She understands the world is concerned?
Her spokesperson: Yes, she understands you vultures are looking for a story.

And she'd like to add something for your research department, only four letters: G, T, F, and O.


Asshole predatory media. Doesn't she have a good sprinkler system?
 
rufus-t-firefly
2009-04-10 2:36:26 PM  
Next on Fox: "Is the media too intrusive, adding a family's pain? We'll find out as we ask a family in pain who is begging to be left the fark alone."
 
Lenny_da_Hog [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 2:37:44 PM  

rufus-t-firefly: Next on Fox: "Is the media too intrusive, adding a family's pain? We'll find out as we ask a family in pain who is begging to be left the fark alone."


Or, "Hi, I'm Bill O'Reilly. We sent Jesse out to track down and ambush the Captain's wife as she went to church to pray for her husband...."
 
Smeggy Smurf
2009-04-10 2:38:04 PM  
Isn't malisciously harassing somebody like this considered terrorism these days?
 
hurdboy
2009-04-10 2:38:30 PM  

Latinwolf: Her spokesperson: Yes, she understands you vultures are looking for a story footage of her teary face to use as B-roll.


FTFY.
 
factoryconnection
2009-04-10 2:41:13 PM  

rufus-t-firefly: Next on Fox: "Is the media too intrusive, adding a family's pain? We'll find out as we ask a family in pain who is begging to be left the fark alone."


Not that this isn't a very Fox thing to do, there were a lot of news outlets of all stripes surrounding her yard. What possible news break could they be seeking from her, 12,000 miles from the action?

BTW: the Captain dove out of the lifeboat to escape, but unfortunately got caught by the pirates somehow.
 
dudemanbro
2009-04-10 2:44:16 PM  
Shotgun. 00 Nitro mags.
 
I_C_Weener [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 2:44:18 PM  

PacersJAM3s: There have been some extremely good headlines lately.

I would like to give you an online high-five, submitter.


+1 would read again.
 
I_C_Weener [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 2:45:32 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Isn't malisciously harassing somebody like this considered terrorism these days?


Ever since Lady Di's driver ran into a wall, it has been considered terrorism...unless "freedom of the press" triumphs again.
 
TommyDeuce [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 2:55:31 PM  

satanicsantoku: NEXT ON FOX! WRENCHING EMOTIONAL PAIN followed by Glenn Beck


Same difference really.
 
Smeggy Smurf
2009-04-10 2:57:31 PM  

I_C_Weener: Smeggy Smurf: Isn't malisciously harassing somebody like this considered terrorism these days?

Ever since Lady Di's driver ran into a wall, it has been considered terrorism...unless "freedom of the press" triumphs again.


I have nothing against freedom of the press but I do have a problem with surrounding a house and hounding people incessantly when everybody can just sit back and wait for the eventual press release.
 
Thisbymaster
2009-04-10 2:59:46 PM  
Time to go SWAT on the reporter's asses. Make sure none survive.
 
Mad Scientist [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2009-04-10 3:02:09 PM  
There but for the grace of FSM go I...

I don't even know what my next door neighbor does for a living, but if someday it becomes allegedly newsworthy and a bunch of newsies set up on my lawn, all I know is I'm gonna take the opportunity for some target practice with the Glock 22.

/ITG Friday!
 
Somacandra [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 3:02:39 PM  
I'd be more interested if the families of the pirates had been surrounded and threatened with public beheading courtesy of the Navy Seals. But perhaps that's just me.

FTFA: it shouldn't be necessary to arm ships, "especially when they're carrying relief to people who desperately need it."

Dude, if I was piloting a ship in international waters with no armed escorts close at hand you damn well bet that ship would have been armed. With at least some serious RPG's and the like. If there aren't any cops around you don't go naked into that good night. Especially anywhere near Somalia, fer cryin' out loud.
 
wademh [TotalFark]
2009-04-10 3:03:57 PM  

Thisbymaster: Time to go SWAT on the reporter's asses. Make sure none survive.


Like the French after a Greenpeace boat.
 
katghoti
2009-04-10 3:10:24 PM  
Just rent the fat guy down the block and have him put up to massive pressed hams on the windows for everyone to see. At least it would distract them for awhile.

My ranking of pukes from lowest to highest

1 Politicians
1.1 Terrorists (anyone killing in the name of 'God')
1.5 Lawyers
2 Reporters for shows like Hard Copy, 20/20, etc
2.1 Reporters
3 Dog Vomit
4 Piss
5 etc
 
tonesskin
2009-04-10 3:16:37 PM  

katghoti: 1 Politicians
1.1 Terrorists (anyone killing in the name of 'God')
1.5 Lawyers
2 Reporters for shows like Hard Copy, 20/20, etc
2.1 Reporters
3 Dog Vomit
4 Piss
5 etc


Yeah, those damn lawyers! How dare they!
 
Doonyman
2009-04-10 3:25:51 PM  
Who is Captain Phillip and why should we care?

/may have been living under a rock?
 
SlothB77
2009-04-10 3:27:10 PM  
is he the new Sully?
 
bottsicus
2009-04-10 3:28:19 PM  
I actually have a buddy who grew up in Underhill. I talked to him about this today. Apparently it is a total shiatshow up there right now. F*ckin vultures...the neighbors must be pretty steamed too, the reason you move to Underhill, VT is to deal with fewer people, not more.
 
IXI Jim IXI
2009-04-10 3:30:08 PM  
We were among just a handful of press outside the Underhill, Vermont home of Captain Richard Phillips at 6:30 this morning. ABC, NBC, CBS and CNN weren't here,

Fox News: We're sleazier than ABC, NBC, CBS and CNN
 
BunkoSquad
2009-04-10 3:30:20 PM  
Doonyman: Who is Captain Phillip and why should we care?

Obviously, you're not a golfer.
 
red5ish
2009-04-10 3:30:25 PM  
Adherents to the Fred Phelps school of ethical behavior.

May they rot.
 
bottsicus
2009-04-10 3:31:35 PM  
dudemanbro: Shotgun. 00 Nitro mags.

Yup. And this being Vermont we're talking about, I wouldn't doubt that there's a 12 gauge (or two) in the house, and that the wife knows how to handle it.
 
IXI Jim IXI
2009-04-10 3:32:39 PM  

Doonyman: Who is Captain Phillip and why should we care?


He's the new Prince Albert.

And no, we're not talking about the one in a can.
 
RepoManTSM
2009-04-10 3:34:53 PM  

farkreader007: Captain Phil?


albie.wsView Full Size
 
MrTim
2009-04-10 3:36:21 PM  
Took this on the way to work at 8:30 this morning. Everyone was across the street. About 5 satellite trucks and 20 or so other vehicles.

82smugglers.comView Full Size
 
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