If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Yahoo)   Asshat telemarketing companies suing to stop national Do Not Call list   ( story.news.yahoo.com) divider line
    More: Asinine  
•       •       •

11442 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Feb 2003 at 2:10 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

201 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-02-01 02:28:33 PM  
Get a clue Fvcktards... If we put our names on the list, that means we don't want your crap.
2003-02-01 03:03:41 PM  
Why do they think it's there in the first place? While they're at it, why don't they sue to allow creeps to have their restraining orders lifted, too.
2003-02-01 05:41:47 PM  
"The FTC is singling out this form of advertising now, what will be next?"

Hopefully the full page flash ads that cover up the web pages you're trying to see.
2003-02-01 06:16:57 PM  
One can always turn to screaming "FARK OFF!!!" into the phone once you know it's a telemarketer. Or, have some fun:

- Say 'can you hang on just a minute?' then put the phone down. Hang up in about an hour.
- Ask 'Can I get your home phone number and call you later and we can talk about the product?' - 'No?' - 'I'm sorry, would I be bothering you at home?'
- Buy one of those telezapper thingies Strom Thurmond is selling.
- Sell them porn. No, don't listen to them, just keep trying to sell them porn. Be descriptive.
2003-02-01 06:25:22 PM  
I'm on my state's DNC list. Works nicely.
2003-02-01 10:57:38 PM  
telemarketer calls are great!

mp3 action: How long can you keep a telemarketer on hold?
2003-02-01 11:30:21 PM  
To expound upon some of Meshman's ideas, yeah, ask if they can hold on for a minute, and don't come back.

Ask them what they're wearing, and if they would mind if you masturbate during the call.

Hang up. Dial *69, get their number, and call them back, alot.

Demand that they marry your sister, because having heard you masturbate, it is required in your country.

Ask then to call back, because having just murdered your entire family, you are a tad busy right now.
2003-02-02 02:12:29 AM  
Well I'll be damned!
2003-02-02 02:13:10 AM  
these stupid telemarketers are now calling my friggin CELL PHONE NUMBER!!!! isn't that illegal?!
2003-02-02 02:14:42 AM  
They always call me @ 8:15 in the morning, I mean christ, I'm still drunk then...
2003-02-02 02:15:22 AM  
I always loved the Seinfeld episode where Jerry picks up the phone to talk to a telemarketer and asks for his phone number and then he's like "Oh, you don't want me calling your house, right? Now you know how I feel." Good ole Seinfeld. I love the ones that sell you phone services, although you obviously already have a service....and the cell phones......I can actually get 5 free cell phones, no risk!
2003-02-02 02:18:33 AM  
Yeah, that Seinfeld moment was great.

It's okay with me if they call me over and over again, because I'll keep pissing of those little farks until they either quit their jobs or they cost their companies so much money that they'll go out of business.

Remember, if you take a job as a telemarketer, YOU are at fault for telemarketing. Don't give me any of that "I was told to do it!" crap. YOU called me because YOU took the job. So quit whining you little brat.
2003-02-02 02:19:36 AM  
[image from chrisbishop.com too old to be available]
2003-02-02 02:19:38 AM  
Neoabsolut1 -- I believe so. Let them know they're calling a cell phone and they'll hang up right quick, and probably never call back.
2003-02-02 02:20:41 AM  
Flzcarson: Hahaha, that was great. I had to listen to the whole thing :)

Reminds me of a little conversation I had with a telemarketer.
2003-02-02 02:20:44 AM  
Good lord people! If the names are on the DNC list, doesn't that mean they don't want your shiat anyway? Be grateful that you're being saved time and money by not calling the people who are smart enough not to buy stuff over the phone anyway.
2003-02-02 02:20:52 AM  
"Could I interest you in some aluminum siding for your home, brother?"
2003-02-02 02:21:46 AM  

Absolutely glorious. Absolutely, FRICKIN' GLORIOUS!!! I hurt...
2003-02-02 02:21:46 AM  
i've always wanted to start a flamewar.
telemarketers=bushs fault?
*sigh* as the months go on w/shrub as our pres., i miss bill more & more. perhaps it's just b/c i spent my formative yrs growing up w/him.
2003-02-02 02:21:52 AM  
The Feds should offer a bounty on telemarketers.
2003-02-02 02:22:11 AM  
talking to telemarketers is fun, expecially messing with thier heads..
i.e. "what, how can i be talking to you, im talking into a banana!"
or the ever standard "fark you"
2003-02-02 02:22:18 AM  
my goodness, that mp3 was great, awesome cut off points, eh?

Some more ideas:

-No matter how deep the voice, pretend to be under 18 and ask many questions like 4 year olds do
-Tell them you've got to drop a wicked shiat and you must continue doing it because of your severe case of diarrhea (sometimes true in my case)
-Whenever they slip up and mispronounce your name, start swearing at them and scream at them, that'll get em good!
-Ask them out on a date, and hey, they already got your number!

Damn I'm tired
2003-02-02 02:22:28 AM  
My wife put my cell # down on some fraggin contest form. Now I get calls on my cell. Pisses me off. I'm on the Texas no call list, and so far I don't many calls. Maybe
once a week. And its always someone trying to sell me magazines. I either do 2 things when this happens, 1> I give the phone to my 3 yr old. Or 2> I ask what pron they got.
2003-02-02 02:22:53 AM  
We have a "Do Not Call" list in Texas and it rocks!! A year and a half with only one telemarketer call. I gave them the web address and told them to look into it because there was a hefty fine, and that if they called back I'd report them.

Now if there was only a "Do Call" list to send out to hot nymphomaniacs, well then I guess I'd be just about set for life.
2003-02-02 02:23:06 AM  
Farking Citibank has called me 5 days in a row trying to get me to sign up for some ursurous credit card. You'd think after the 4th time they'd learn I DON'T FARKING WANT IT!
2003-02-02 02:24:17 AM  
Good mp3. I want on hold music and we'll be with you in a moment announcments too for my phone.
2003-02-02 02:24:23 AM  
asshats, pure asshats.
2003-02-02 02:25:20 AM  
I dealt with it by canning my land line and only using my cell. Now the only people I have to run off are door to door.
2003-02-02 02:25:21 AM  
Whenever a Telemarketer calls for me I tell them I am his room-mate. If they don't hang up at that point I drag it out for a while. When I finally get tired, I'll ask how my name could be in their data base when they didn't call for me and I haven't told them my name. They usually sputter for a second or two and hang up.
2003-02-02 02:26:06 AM  
Telemarketers are cool.
2003-02-02 02:26:48 AM  
On a related note, I found this site off the metal sludge board. It's how to stop getting junk mail.

2003-02-02 02:27:13 AM  
The Three Telemarketeers.
2003-02-02 02:29:43 AM  
I like telemarketers, saves me the trouble of calling some random person to help me masturbate.
2003-02-02 02:30:19 AM  
Telemarketing Facts
-The projected anual growth rate is 15-20% between now and the year 2002.
-Nearly 265,000 US companies will be using telemarketing in the near future.
-The overall consumer penetration of telemarketing adds up to an unbelieveable 47.5 million households.
-Two factors have primarily fueled this growth: Costs of other marketing media has risen, while telemarketing costs have gone down.
-The use of telemarketing as an effective sales and service tool is widespread. Statistics indicate that the yearly sales of goods and services by phone in the US totals well over $150 billion and $750 billion worldwide.

I would think it's the most boring, redundant way of getting info to your customers. If anything I would think that telemarketing would cause a loss of interest. I heard somewhere that the percentage of people that actually buy something from a telemarketer is about .001%, either that or they only need .001% of people on their list to buy something in order to make a profit. fark telemarketing, what an invasion of my privacy.
2003-02-02 02:31:59 AM  

you farkin rock. dallas stars rule all. :D
are you from dallas??
2003-02-02 02:34:36 AM  
I wonder why they haven't started telemarketing those amazing penis enhancing potions yet.
2003-02-02 02:36:11 AM  
Neoabsolut1 - Yes, I do farkin' rock. Thanks for noticing. I think our Stars are going to go far this year. I don't live in Dallas. I live out in the country with the cows but I'm still close enough to catch the games.
2003-02-02 02:36:50 AM  
You all need a good ass-fvcking from SATAN!
2003-02-02 02:37:51 AM  
Tickets to hell, get 'em while they're hot!
2003-02-02 02:38:07 AM  
Use that Arnold soundboard from Ebaumsworld.com on them.

2003-02-02 02:41:45 AM  
i'm glad i'm not popular enough to get telemarketer calls
2003-02-02 02:43:09 AM  
testes testes...1...2...3?!
2003-02-02 02:45:04 AM  

most def. will go far. these boys are doin much better than i expected one yr removed from the sad sad 02 season.
well, 'least you get to catch enough of the games. i just moved to Boston for school. Note to all: wouldn't advise walkin around boston in stars garb. :/ i def. speak from experience.
2003-02-02 02:45:06 AM  
Call Intercept from Verizon.

Blocks telemarketers 99% of the time.
2003-02-02 02:45:41 AM  
[image from agnostos-theos.net too old to be available]
2003-02-02 02:46:05 AM  

Sorry, but I think I sold my soul to a guy named Stan...some asshat forgot that A.

[image from picturehosting.net too old to be available]
2003-02-02 02:48:06 AM  
Neoabsolut1 - You need to get a Guerrin Stars jersey. I'll bet that would go over big there.
2003-02-02 02:53:56 AM  
We avoid the telemarketers by having an unlisted number. Also helpful if you don't feel like giving out your personal info to some asshat at Radio Shack when you wanna buy some battries.
2003-02-02 02:54:03 AM  
they say great minds think alike? :D
way ahead of you on that idea...
2003-02-02 02:56:00 AM  
Wow. You'd think these guys would just figure it out that people don't like being bothered at home.

Now that someone's finally done something about it, they're gonna get all huffy and act like it's their right to call me and bother me without my permission.

I'm all about a national DNC list. I think if enough people got on it, Telemarketers would just go out of business.
Displayed 50 of 201 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.