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(AP)   Store owner responds to repeated shoplifting of balsamic vinegar with sign reading: "Thanks to the Balsamic Vinegar Thief this area is now under surveillance. We will get you." Sounds like sour grapes to me   (hosted.ap.org) divider line
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3540 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Feb 2009 at 8:40 PM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



79 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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Kareeshus
2009-02-25 8:44:39 PM  
$40 for a bottle of vinegar? I thought wine was expensive.
 
S.A.S.Q.U.A.T.C.H.
2009-02-25 8:44:43 PM  
That shait is farking expensive.


/baker
 
HotWingConspiracy
2009-02-25 8:45:13 PM  
No, you won't get him. You just told him about the camera.
 
ScottMpls
2009-02-25 8:45:45 PM  
Maybe offer him some tossed salad ...
 
Monk87
2009-02-25 8:46:08 PM  
Hey at least it's not a Cereal Stealer...

/get it?
//it's a play on words
///look close it's there...
 
thereadlines
2009-02-25 8:51:58 PM  

ScottMpls: Maybe offer him some tossed salad ...


"I prefer syrup."

Legendary skit.
 
naveline
2009-02-25 8:53:53 PM  
1) place vinegar in basket
2) stroll to canned goods aisle while whistling
3) transfer vinegar to pants, continue whistling
4) buy 50c can of chickpeas, 2$ bag of arugula mix, 3$ bag of walnuts
5) enjoy tasty salad* back at gangster hideout.


(all gourmet thugs keep copious amounts of olive oil in their hide-outs to give the fuzz the slip)
 
ManBearPig
2009-02-25 8:54:54 PM  
DEPLETED URANIUM

/so obscure
 
lelio
2009-02-25 8:56:06 PM  

naveline: =
(all gourmet thugs keep copious amounts of olive oil in their hide-outs to give the fuzz the slip)


fap fap fap
 
fotojenic
2009-02-25 8:56:51 PM  
It's always gonna be sour grapes with you, boy, until you get right with Jesus.
 
thereadlines
2009-02-25 8:57:49 PM  

naveline: 1) place vinegar in basket
2) stroll to canned goods aisle while whistling
3) transfer vinegar to pants, continue whistling
4) buy 50c can of chickpeas, 2$ bag of arugula mix, 3$ bag of walnuts
5) enjoy tasty salad* back at gangster hideout.


Elitist!
 
creepygeek
2009-02-25 8:57:56 PM  
So, the thought of not stocking such a loss-prone item never occurred to them? Or, better yet, lock it in a case with the condoms!
 
Bohemian
2009-02-25 8:59:17 PM  
Hmm. The store I buy fairly pricey olive oil at recently moved all of the olive oil and balsamic vinegar to a shelf directly across from the register in the back of the store. It used to be in the shelves right by the front door. I wonder if the McCastle dwelling soccer moms have been shoplifting vinegar and olive oil with the economy tanking.
 
horonto [TotalFark]
2009-02-25 9:00:13 PM  
Wow, this must be in the 'hood, right?
 
december
2009-02-25 9:00:34 PM  
save up the $40 and then buy some aged balsamic. once you've tried it, it is hard to forget it. it's more like syrup, and the flavours are amazing. you can still use the $4 stuff for cooking, but keep a bottle of the good stuff for finishing your plates and salads. to a lesser extent the same is true for olive oils.
 
strapp3r [TotalFark]
2009-02-25 9:02:25 PM  
thieves suck
 
Constance Velocity
2009-02-25 9:02:43 PM  
A friend of mine owns a music store and the most shoplifted items were violin strings. First, she moved them behind the counter and now she is going to discontinue them completely because the violin parents are such pains in the ass. I suspect the balsamic vinegar thief suffers from the same level of self-importance.
 
wineguy
2009-02-25 9:04:03 PM  
FTA: Steve Esselstyn, community liaison for the Bend Police Department, says the police don't get many calls from grocery stores, and when they do it's typically something along the lines of a kid trying to score beer.

But balsamic vinegar?

"Well," Esselstyn said, "they must be a vegetarian."

Wait... wut?
 
Arkanaut
2009-02-25 9:08:07 PM  
I wonder just how often these are going missing. Maybe it's a nearby restaurant / deli?
 
PennyCentury
2009-02-25 9:08:58 PM  

Kareeshus: $40 for a bottle of vinegar? I thought wine was expensive.


It's not really vinegar when it's done aging.

/try some, won't you? drizzle some on sliced strawberries
 
mrswelborne
2009-02-25 9:11:35 PM  

Arkanaut: I wonder just how often these are going missing disappearing. Maybe it's a nearby restaurant / deli?


FTFY -- no charge

/grammar nazi
 
wineguy
2009-02-25 9:13:22 PM  

PennyCentury: Kareeshus: $40 for a bottle of vinegar? I thought wine was expensive.

It's not really vinegar when it's done aging.

/try some, won't you? drizzle some on sliced strawberries


Also it really livens up cold pizza, IMHO.
 
gloomduckie
2009-02-25 9:13:44 PM  

wineguy: FTA: Steve Esselstyn, community liaison for the Bend Police Department, says the police don't get many calls from grocery stores, and when they do it's typically something along the lines of a kid trying to score beer.

But balsamic vinegar?

"Well," Esselstyn said, "they must be a vegetarian."

Wait... wut?


Yeah, that was my reaction as well. Apparently, Mr Esselstyn doesn't cook or watch any cooking shows.
 
dennysgod
2009-02-25 9:17:47 PM  
Does anybody have a clue what, other then cooking, could balsamic vinegar be used for?
 
Ecobuckeye
2009-02-25 9:22:57 PM  

dennysgod: balsamic vinegar


"it may even be drunk from a tiny glass to conclude a meal"
 
Kareeshus
2009-02-25 9:24:00 PM  
Huh, really. I had no idea. Where do you even buy this type of premium balsamic vinegar? My grocery stores must be too ghetto - you can't even buy a package of cheap razors without asking the manager.
 
studebaker hoch [TotalFark]
2009-02-25 9:25:35 PM  
Shoplifting is for losers.
 
bunner
2009-02-25 9:26:00 PM  

strapp3r: thieves suck


This.
 
Thisbymaster
2009-02-25 9:26:43 PM  
Poison the ones on the shelves and then if someone buys it Switch it with a good one.
 
MissDementia
2009-02-25 9:30:31 PM  

PennyCentury: Kareeshus: $40 for a bottle of vinegar? I thought wine was expensive.

It's not really vinegar when it's done aging.

/try some, won't you? drizzle some on sliced strawberries


Aged balsamic on fruit of almost any kind is one of my favorite snacks! I also dip my bread sticks in truffle oil. Good thing the restaurant buys all that stuff as a matter of course. I hate spending money on food when I know I can just go to work and make the sous cook it for me while I "work on the schedule".

/"work on the schedule" = screw around on the internet in the office
//"recipe development" = screw around on the internet while drinking wine and eating in the office
///this concludes your lesson in "Chef's Secrets"
 
Constance Velocity
2009-02-25 9:32:18 PM  

Thisbymaster: Poison the ones on the shelves and then if someone buys it Switch it with a good one.


When I rule the world, I will appoint you to my cabinet.
 
MrBeetle
2009-02-25 9:32:48 PM  
Try it on vanilla ice cream... Delicious!
 
Lamune_Baba
2009-02-25 9:35:35 PM  
The restaurant in the hotel I used to work night-shift always bragged about how they were on the culinary high-end, bragged about their chef, and of course charged a premium for the food because they only used the best ingredients.

I wandered around the stock room while setting up the breakfast early one morning browsing their wares. Then I ran across what I was looking for- the balsamic. I'd already planned it... smuggling it into my stomach a few drops at a time on fruits or cheeses, which just happened to be in my dinner.

The brand they used came in a 64oz plastic jug... (at the time) available for $9 on Amazon. =`(

/they went out of business in less than 6 months
 
Moonk
2009-02-25 9:44:48 PM  

Lamune_Baba: The restaurant in the hotel I used to work night-shift always bragged about how they were on the culinary high-end, bragged about their chef, and of course charged a premium for the food because they only used the best ingredients.

I wandered around the stock room while setting up the breakfast early one morning browsing their wares. Then I ran across what I was looking for- the balsamic. I'd already planned it... smuggling it into my stomach a few drops at a time on fruits or cheeses, which just happened to be in my dinner.

The brand they used came in a 64oz plastic jug... (at the time) available for $9 on Amazon. =`(

/they went out of business in less than 6 months


Yup! just make a nice reduction out of it and the rubes will never know the difference. Until someone with a palate orders it.
 
Pantload
2009-02-25 9:48:15 PM  

december: save up the $40 and then buy some aged balsamic. once you've tried it, it is hard to forget it. it's more like syrup, and the flavours are amazing. you can still use the $4 stuff for cooking, but keep a bottle of the good stuff for finishing your plates and salads. to a lesser extent the same is true for olive oils.


THIS!!!
 
Spider Dijon
2009-02-25 9:50:41 PM  
Okay people, now you've got me hungry.
Not that I'm keen on advertising, but some recommended brands would be appreciated by some of us non-professional chefs.
So...
Any recommendations?
Ranging in price from cheap to ridiculous...


/must buy strawberries now, just to try it with the vinegar!
 
Pantload
2009-02-25 9:54:41 PM  
I am no authority on anything, but I believe that all balsamic vinegar comes from Modena, Italy. On my undistinguished palate, it all tastes good. Big Lots(yes) had a small bottle for $2-3 and you can still taste the delicios wonderfulness, on bread, or on vegetables, or in vinegar/oil salad dressing.

Would anyone really make a reduction with balsamic? seems like a waste.
 
ceejayoz [OhFark]
2009-02-25 9:55:57 PM  

Spider Dijon: Any recommendations?
Ranging in price from cheap to ridiculous...


This stuff is my go-to for normal use. This stuff I use for special occasions. Both are wonderful, I'd highly recommend them.

Anyone saying balsamic isn't worth $40 hasn't tried the good stuff. Mmmmmmmm...
 
Pantload
2009-02-25 9:56:19 PM  
um, duh... by saying that it alls comes from Modena, I was attempting to say that there may not be huge variations in the flavor between the most expensive and more frugal brands.
 
ceejayoz [OhFark]
2009-02-25 10:10:48 PM  

Pantload: um, duh... by saying that it alls comes from Modena, I was attempting to say that there may not be huge variations in the flavor between the most expensive and more frugal brands.


That's like saying all the wine from the Napa Valley is the same.

How it's grown, processed, and aged makes a tremendous difference. I've bought the $6 balsamic vinegar from Modena in the grocery store before, and it's watery. The good stuff is pricey for a reason.
 
Spider Dijon
2009-02-25 10:13:04 PM  
ceejayoz

While I like stuff from WS + that other one looks like some of what I used to sell while working (+ learning!) at a gourmet shop -- these would be special occasion items for me.
Champagne tastes, Pepsi budget... you get the idea.

Is there anything remotely passable in the regular supermarket aisle?
 
DrForrester
2009-02-25 10:15:23 PM  
nndb.comView Full Size
 
ceejayoz [OhFark]
2009-02-25 10:16:06 PM  

Spider Dijon: Is there anything remotely passable in the regular supermarket aisle?


Well, here's the thing. One of those WS bottles lasts us six months - you only need a very small amount, as the flavour of the good stuff is tremendously potent.

If you're dead set on supermarket stuff, the Newman's Own stuff is okay, but it's still watery and nowhere near as sweet.
 
eldopa
2009-02-25 10:17:30 PM  
h
 
wildcardjack [BareFark]
2009-02-25 10:18:53 PM  
Aged Balsamic vinegar is one of those products I can see keeping under lock and key. High value concentration.

I'm doing this quick, but somewhere on the Thomas Register there has to be a company that makes individual polycarbonate locking cases for high value items.
 
wineguy
2009-02-25 10:22:23 PM  

Spider Dijon: ceejayoz

While I like stuff from WS + that other one looks like some of what I used to sell while working (+ learning!) at a gourmet shop -- these would be special occasion items for me.
Champagne tastes, Pepsi budget... you get the idea.

Is there anything remotely passable in the regular supermarket aisle?


My everyday balsamic is Colavita. It's available in a lot of supermarkets, and should be under $10 a bottle>
 
eldopa
2009-02-25 10:22:39 PM  
Okay, obviously I didn't mean to post the above message.
 
inthrees
2009-02-25 10:23:33 PM  

HotWingConspiracy: No, you won't get him. You just told him about the camera.


This.

You're doing it wrong.

Facepalm.

Etc.
 
Spider Dijon
2009-02-25 10:27:43 PM  
ceejayoz
...the flavour of the good stuff is tremendously potent.
Thanks ceejayoz.
I know, and you're right.
*sigh*
I was hoping against hope that someone else had found what I couldn't.
Thanks so much for the info!

wineguy
Thanks wineguy!

I'll probably spring for WS + Colavita + use them according to the dish, the occasion + whom I'm feeding.

So nice when Fark is useful + friendly!
/It happens!
 
tweekster
2009-02-25 10:36:31 PM  

Constance Velocity: Thisbymaster: Poison the ones on the shelves and then if someone buys it Switch it with a good one.

When I rule the world, I will appoint you to my cabinet.


Until you get mysteriously poisoned.
 
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