FARK.com: (4200663) Since Ultimate Fighting is apparently not homoerotic enough, MMA's "War Machine" arrested for fighting in gay night club

It's Not News, It's Fark

If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

		Since Ultimate Fighting is apparently not homoerotic enough, MMA's "War Machine" arrested for fighting in gay night club (tmz.com)		90
		More: Dumbass

• • •

3062 clicks; posted to Sports » on 10 Feb 2009 at 6:28 AM (14 years ago) | Favorite | share:

90 Comments (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

Bucky Katt

2009-02-10 1:21:16 AM

Guys beating the crap out of each other is gay? Wow, I"m sure glad I've never watched that stuff.

7of7

2009-02-10 1:26:38 AM

IAmRight

2009-02-10 1:49:59 AM

If the first thing you think of when watching a sport is of the competitors in a sexual way, you're probably the one that's gay.

FootInMouthDisease

2009-02-10 2:32:10 AM

IAmRight If the first thing you think of when watching a sport is of the competitors in a sexual way, you're probably the one that's gay.

when i hear 'omg lawlz thats teh gay' the first thing i understand is that they have no idea what's actually going on, especially in a ground battle.

if MMA is a little 'homoerotic' what does that make the choreographed soap opera that is WWE?

/to be fair, that anyone would allow a condom depot ad on their compression shorts, let alone across the ass in bold is hilarious

Drakkenmaw

2009-02-10 3:29:08 AM

FootInMouthDisease: if MMA is a little 'homoerotic' what does that make the choreographed soap opera that is WWE?

I believe that's referred to as "Liberace gay."

fark2105

2009-02-10 7:00:39 AM

Come to grips with yourself Subby...er...........maybe I should rephrase that.

Gunny Highway

2009-02-10 7:02:21 AM

Ugh Im just going to take this one off I think.

MugzyBrown

2009-02-10 7:04:34 AM

FootInMouthDisease: when i hear 'omg lawlz thats teh gay' the first thing i understand is that they have no idea what's actually going on, especially in a ground battle.

I know what's going on down there and it's still pretty gay.

socodog

2009-02-10 7:15:49 AM

That guy sure does look like a fag.

I'm a casual fan of MMA and that dude looks like a cock smuggler.

rorypk

2009-02-10 7:22:56 AM

Short, repressed homosexuals deserve a sport too.

182

2009-02-10 7:26:56 AM

/Botox-dicksucking lips
//shoot off in his cauliflower ear

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 8:05:17 AM

For a "fight" there sure does seem to be a whole lot of humping involved.

I'm not saying that all MMA fighters are gay. I'm saying that a sport which is largely comprised of rolling around and man-spooning while likely attract a lot of gay men.

As for the argument of which is gayer MMA or WWE? I'd say MMA due to the aggressiveness and aforementioned buggery. WWE is mostly flamboyance and pastel spandex.

WWE=Will & Grace
MMA=300

Gunny Highway

2009-02-10 8:14:14 AM

GavinTheAlmighty

2009-02-10 8:36:58 AM

Oh jeez. Jon Koppenhaver is a huge, huge piece of shiat. This is the guy who was making fun of Evan Tanner basically minutes after he died, he's expressed an interest in having Barack Obama shot, and he's generally just a classless piece of crap. The best possible thing that happeend to him is having Yoshiyuki Yoshida beat him.

And yes, if you watch MMA and think it's gay, you're probably pretty gay yourself. NTTAWWT.

GavinTheAlmighty

2009-02-10 8:51:38 AM

Owangotang: I'm not sure what is worse on Fark, the constant use of the term "fake wrestling" or the fact that every time MMA is brought up someone calls it homoerotic.

I mean this entirely non-pejoratively, but I think it's because most people just don't know what MMA entails. Most people have no idea the amount of strategy that goes into fighting, and just how technical it is, both on the fight and on the mat.

Want to be impressed? Go search for GSP/Greg Jackson's game plan against BJ Penn for UFC 94. It's like farking neurosurgery. Unbelievable.

The Divine Ponytail

2009-02-10 8:54:49 AM

My two favorite sports are football - the epitome of team and MMA - the epitome of individual, I guess that makes me double ghey by fark thread standards.

Dogfacedgod

2009-02-10 8:59:04 AM

mount

Noah's Arcade

2009-02-10 9:12:11 AM

blueknight

2009-02-10 9:12:52 AM

came to see crying wrestling guy, satisfied

/* its still real to me,damnit *

GavinTheAlmighty

2009-02-10 9:19:27 AM

Noah's Arcade

I love that picture. But still, I can think of many, MANY places I'd rather be than facing down Shogun or Wanderlei Silva in a cage. Namely, everywhere.

FlyingPig

2009-02-10 9:22:42 AM

I'm not a fan of UFC or anything, but what exactly is "homoerotic" about beating the shiat out of someone?

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 9:22:53 AM

I don't deny that these guys are athletes. MMA takes such a high toll on your body and joints that just to train seriously for a bout takes serious balls. But there's no denying that any time you get two guys writhing around in a sweaty mass on a mat it's pretty damn ghey.

I have had conversations with gay guys who love the sport for two reasons.

A) The sticky man pretzels.

B) Although gay, they're still guys and like to watch a fight.

Also IMO I just can't get into that style of fighting. Not because of the gayness (well, not just because of the gayness) but because I find the whole thing incredibly boring. I'd much prefer seeing two guys go toe to toe until one of them can't stand on his own two legs anymore than a fight that quickly devolves into a highly skilled and deadly variation of plunge the pickle.

And don't trot out that old chestnut "That 'gay' guy would still whip your ass!" Of course he would. Mostly because he's a trained fighter and my fighting skills peaked somewhere in between Tekken 3 and Tekken Tag Tournament. Partly because I's tap out as soon as I felt a dick rubbing up against me.

/Because MMA is pretty farking gay.
//It doesn't mean you're gay for enjoying it.
///It doesn't mean I'm gay for thinking its gay.
////It doesn't mean all MMA fighters are gay. I'm pretty sure though if every pro athlete came out of the closet the number of homo/bisexuals in all sports would shock us.

psychoace

2009-02-10 9:23:54 AM

Guy must of been listening to the song "War Machine" by Kiss.

RIP Ace

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 9:26:46 AM

FlyingPig: I'm not a fan of UFC or anything, but what exactly is "homoerotic" about beating the shiat out of someone?

See my above post.

caperbear

2009-02-10 9:32:47 AM

As a gay guy who studied a little mma... yeah a lot of positions are pretty familiar. However, when I was training I wasn't thinking about that sort of thing, i was trying not to get hurt or not hurt my fellow trainees.

Except for this one time where we were trying something I think was called an "S-mount" where the guy on top is sitting on your chest and has one leg under your neck and the other knee on your solar plexus or something. The guy on the bottom almost has his face jammed into the other guy's junk. I made eye contact with the trainer who was running the class and gave him a pained look and said "Not one word outta you!" and he laughed out loud.

As for the sport, it's said that there are plenty of gay guys in the MMA biz, but where are they? why don't we see more profiles of them in gay periodicals? why are they on the down low?

GavinTheAlmighty

2009-02-10 9:36:18 AM

A few possible explanations:

1. A fighter may feel that announcing his love of man-cock would jeopardize his position with his fans
2. Perhaps the president of the league (Dana White) feels that announcing this might jeopardize his league's position with the fans (of course, that's making assumptions that people might actually care, but in the interest of business, I can appreciate erring on the side of caution)
3. Potential ostracism from other fighters

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 9:50:09 AM

If you doubt that having openly gay fighters on your roster will hurt your promotion then look no further than this thread and every single Fark MMA thread. Every single fan will try to deny that there's anything at all gay about two muscular men rolling around fighting for the dominant position.

PressPlayOnTape

2009-02-10 9:51:57 AM

GavinTheAlmighty:

A few possible explanations:

1. A fighter may feel that announcing his love of man-cock would jeopardize his position with his fans.....

To be honest, I'd think that professing a love of woman-cock would be even creepier.

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 9:53:09 AM

Half of the roster being openly gay would make for some damn interesting PPVs though.

Magorn

2009-02-10 9:55:46 AM

Owangotang: I'm not sure what is worse on Fark, the constant use of the term "fake wrestling" or the fact that every time MMA is brought up someone calls it homoerotic.

Whether or not the particpants are gay or straight, whether their intentions are sexual or not, MMA IS homoerotic; that is, men who like seeing men have sex with each other probably find the action on the screen erotic.

It doesn't make it any less a sport, it just is what it is. Women's beach Volleyball,(or hell even the indoor Collegiate variety) are perfectly legitimate sports but are also incredibly hetero-erotic as well.

Mr. Vincent Vega

2009-02-10 9:56:53 AM

PressPlayOnTape: GavinTheAlmighty:

A few possible explanations:

1. A fighter may feel that announcing his love of man-cock would jeopardize his position with his fans.....

To be honest, I'd think that professing a love of woman-cock would be even creepier.

Has Chyna switched to MMA?

GavinTheAlmighty

2009-02-10 10:07:33 AM

Mr. Vincent Vega: Has Chyna switched to MMA?

I wonder how Carano or Cyborg would do against someone so ludicrously strong.

ihatedumbpeople

2009-02-10 10:11:30 AM

once again..if you see MMA and immediately think "that's ghey", you're probably a closeted homo yourself.

Gays exist in every sport. Football, basketball, hockey. Even figure skating has been infiltrated by gay men, who woulda thought?

MugzyBrown

2009-02-10 10:19:59 AM

ihatedumbpeople: once again..if you ~~see MMA and immediately think "that's ghey"~~ enjoy watching mostly naked men roll on the floor with their crotches in each others faces, you're probably a closeted homo yourself.

ihatedumbpeople

2009-02-10 10:42:37 AM

MugzyBrown: ihatedumbpeople: once again..if you see MMA and immediately think "that's ghey" enjoy watching mostly naked men roll on the floor with their crotches in each others faces, you're probably a closeted homo yourself.

At least I'm not from Philly.

The Divine Ponytail

2009-02-10 10:43:15 AM

Hand to hand combat is among the least gay things I can think of...yes, it is by definition intimate (i.e., you have to actually touch your opponent in order to hurt them), but gay or sexy or whatever, not so much.

Here's a test, next time a guy is trying to smash your face in, tell him that he's probably gay and see how that works out for you.

Here's another test, when you're studying hand to hand combat in your marine corps basic training, tell the DI that you don't want to learn it because it is homoerotic and again, see how that works out for you.

Kurmudgeon

2009-02-10 10:43:18 AM

"Gays exist in every sport. Football, basketball, hockey. Even figure skating has been infiltrated by gay men, who woulda thought?"

Even professional tobacco spitters? Now if it was swallowers, you may be onto something.

FiatJustitia

2009-02-10 10:50:25 AM

Mr. Vincent Vega: If you doubt that having openly gay fighters on your roster will hurt your promotion then look no further than this thread and every single Fark MMA thread. Every single fan will try to deny that there's anything at all gay about two muscular men rolling around fighting for the dominant position.

This guy was doing it long before MMA became popular:

/three fourths of DBZ plots center around blonde, muscular men fighting with each other
//didn't make it any less awesome when I was a kid

May I spooge on your face

2009-02-10 10:54:13 AM

Why can't MMA guys stop being so faggy and play a real man's sport?

[image from media.loudounextra.com too old to be available]

Daniels

2009-02-10 11:00:26 AM

caperbear: As for the sport, it's said that there are plenty of gay guys in the MMA biz, but where are they? why don't we see more profiles of them in gay periodicals? why are they on the down low?

For the same reason that there are no open gay baseball or football players. Lots of ME MANLY jocks in the locker room who would be made uncomfortable. It's probably just not worth the headache for them.

bel4sucks

2009-02-10 11:05:43 AM

IAmRight: If the first thing you think of when watching a sport is of the competitors in a sexual way, you're probably the one that's gay.

ihatedumbpeople: once again..if you see MMA and immediately think "that's ghey", you're probably a closeted homo yourself.

Dudes, I dunno, if you're so quick to run to the defense of men rolling around on the ground together, you might be so deep in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.

tatum

2009-02-10 11:14:52 AM

Don't know or care whether this one, some, many or all MMA fighters are gay.
Not interested in what some, many or all farkers think about whether MMA is slightly or mostly gay...I enjoy watching skilled combat sport.

Rather disappointed that anyone still cares whether that one, some or anyone is or isn't gay.
Have none of you ever been to a gay club (personal sexual preferences notwithstanding)?

Are you that repressed/uptight that you think it means a goddamn thing which bar serves you a drink?

/methinks this thread doth protest too much

StopArrestingMe

2009-02-10 11:27:42 AM

Im just tired of how you gays always have to advertise it. Im STRAIGHT but I dont walk around telling everyone. I dont go around trying to have a proposition that makes the fedoral government give rights to straight people. I dont have straight pride parades. I dont have a sport where I make you watch me be straight. So do NOT make me watch you guys rear naked choke each other. My daughter Gracie should NOT be exposed to this sodom and gomorrah BS and she should NOT be hearing about this war machine going on a rampage in a gay club and getting arrested by the cro cops. He should be executed for interfering with the law and thats the truth.

I hear this gay sport is the most fastest growing sport in America. And Islam is fastest growing religion in the world? I dont know whats less appealing, the gay guy who wants to clean my ass like a janitor or the axe murderer who wants to behead me for having freedom. JK obviously the gay guy is less appealing. Anyway God is getting pissed at your gay and Islam BS. He will soon envelop us a mist with giant spiders and monsters and such. IMO we should sacrifice this gay war machine to the abomination. No one shall be harmed tonight.

And do NOT threaten me or call me gay because otherwise as Iceman said in the least gay movie ever "youre body is writing checks that youre ego cant cash and I am dangerous and will LITERALLY shoot you." F all you libs and your gay "sport" and F Brock Obama. I am NOT gay.

Kanemano

2009-02-10 11:38:58 AM

Oh my there are homosexual athletes, stop all sports where I might touch one.

Senior_Blanco

2009-02-10 11:40:26 AM

StopArrestingMe

You sound gay.

fritopendejo

2009-02-10 11:44:30 AM

Mr. Vincent Vega: I don't deny that these guys are athletes. MMA takes such a high toll on your body and joints that just to train seriously for a bout takes serious balls. But there's no denying that any time you get two guys writhing around in a sweaty mass on a mat it's pretty damn ghey.

I have had conversations with gay guys who love the sport for two reasons.

A) The sticky man pretzels.

B) Although gay, they're still guys and like to watch a fight.

Also IMO I just can't get into that style of fighting. Not because of the gayness (well, not just because of the gayness) but because I find the whole thing incredibly boring. I'd much prefer seeing two guys go toe to toe until one of them can't stand on his own two legs anymore than a fight that quickly devolves into a highly skilled and deadly variation of plunge the pickle.

And don't trot out that old chestnut "That 'gay' guy would still whip your ass!" Of course he would. Mostly because he's a trained fighter and my fighting skills peaked somewhere in between Tekken 3 and Tekken Tag Tournament. Partly because I's tap out as soon as I felt a dick rubbing up against me.

/Because MMA is pretty farking gay.
//It doesn't mean you're gay for enjoying it.
///It doesn't mean I'm gay for thinking its gay.
~~////It doesn't mean all MMA fighters are gay. I'm pretty sure though if every pro athlete came out of the closet the number of homo/bisexuals in all sports would shock us~~.

ftfy

fritopendejo

2009-02-10 11:47:04 AM

StopArrestingMe: Im just tired of how you gays always have to advertise it. Im STRAIGHT but I dont walk around telling everyone. I dont go around trying to have a proposition that makes the fedoral government give rights to straight people. I dont have straight pride parades. I dont have a sport where I make you watch me be straight. So do NOT make me watch you guys rear naked choke each other. My daughter Gracie should NOT be exposed to this sodom and gomorrah BS and she should NOT be hearing about this war machine going on a rampage in a gay club and getting arrested by the cro cops. He should be executed for interfering with the law and thats the truth.

I hear this gay sport is the most fastest growing sport in America. And Islam is fastest growing religion in the world? I dont know whats less appealing, the gay guy who wants to clean my ass like a janitor or the axe murderer who wants to behead me for having freedom. JK obviously the gay guy is less appealing. Anyway God is getting pissed at your gay and Islam BS. He will soon envelop us a mist with giant spiders and monsters and such. IMO we should sacrifice this gay war machine to the abomination. No one shall be harmed tonight.

And do NOT threaten me or call me gay because otherwise as Iceman said in the least gay movie ever "youre body is writing checks that youre ego cant cash and I am dangerous and will LITERALLY shoot you." F all you libs and your gay "sport" and F Brock Obama. I am NOT gay.

Awesome. I'm not sure if it would be awesomer if you were serious or trolling. Doesn't matter...that was awesome.

J13P

2009-02-10 11:47:32 AM

HAHAHAAHAHA I have a bridge to sell you in new york.

what a fag!

The Divine Ponytail

2009-02-10 11:54:09 AM

Burn_Atlanta

2009-02-10 12:00:10 PM

GavinTheAlmighty: Want to be impressed? Go search for GSP/Greg Jackson's game plan against BJ Penn for UFC 94. It's like farking neurosurgery. Unbelievable.

You mean he couldn't think it up until after he'd gone through four years of college, four years of medical school, and 6-8 years of residency and advanced training? I completely agree: unbelievable.

Displayed 50 of 90 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

Redisplay/refresh comments

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

If you like these links, you'll love

The next best thing to UltraFark

learn more | sign up

Report

Support Fark

learn more

Headlines of the Month
Fark NotNewsletter

Report

Like Fark!

Follow @Fark On Twitter

Report

Fark.com

Top Commented

Top Commented ▼

Top Commented
Top Clicked
Top Voted
My Recent Commented
Recent Mentions

Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.
When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.
Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.
You need to create an account to submit links or post comments.
Click here to submit a link.