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(Some Guy)   Thirty-eight planned movie remakes you never wanted to know about. Dear God... they're remaking "Footloose"   (denofgeek.com) divider line
    More: Scary  
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11969 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Mar 2008 at 1:18 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



125 Comments     (+0 »)


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2008-03-24 1:25:55 AM  
Pelham 123? There's nothing wrong with the original!

Not going to pass judgement on Battle Royale until I see who they get for it. Still, wouldn't it be easier to just put the original on DVD and market the hell out of it?
 
2008-03-24 1:28:32 AM  
movieactors.comView Full Size


Gesundheit.
 
2008-03-24 1:32:42 AM  
I would biatch and moan about the lack of ideas in Hollywood, but i would just sound like an adult in a Charlie Brown cartoon

WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH, WAH WAH
 
2008-03-24 1:34:25 AM  
Enough with the Dune.

I'm a big believer in the fact that remakes for the most part don't ruin the original film, with very rare exceptions. And nothing is too sacred for a remake, but The Birds and The Dirty Dozen still stand fine on their own. Logan's Run is one of the greatest/worst dated movies ever made, so go for it.
 
2008-03-24 1:36:02 AM  
shinjitsuism: Gesundheit.

Seriously, I love that movie. Frank Costanza and Felix Unger thwart bandits on the subway. Would watch it now if it wasn't so damned late.
 
2008-03-24 1:38:01 AM  
The Lives Of Others

The stunning German film is getting an American remake, with Anthony Minghella attached to produce, but not direct. It's only been optioned so far, so 2010 would be the earliest you see it. Our advice? See the original. It's genuinely stunning.


Sounds like the page needs a quick update.
 
2008-03-24 1:46:38 AM  
Remaking Footloose? Why not remake Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo, it has aged just as well.

/remake Flashdance, you can never have enough of a dancing woman drenched in water
 
2008-03-24 1:46:43 AM  
Short Circuit? SHORT F-ING CIRCUIT??!! Bastards should be shot for just thinking that.
 
2008-03-24 1:47:37 AM  
if they remake Near Dark i'm gonna hurt someone...
 
182
2008-03-24 1:55:28 AM  
No Brave New World? Or is it already finished?
 
182
2008-03-24 1:56:22 AM  
Oops! I got ahead of myself.
 
2008-03-24 2:01:04 AM  
Zombie Hitler: Seriously, I love that movie. Frank Costanza and Felix Unger thwart bandits on the subway. Would watch it now if it wasn't so damned late.

Frank Costanza lol

grizzoulian.comView Full Size


We're moving to Del Bocca Vista because the Seinfeld's don't want us there. NO ONE TELLS FRANK COSTANZA WHAT TO DO!
 
2008-03-24 2:03:58 AM  
They could remake the movie The Day After. The world needs another wake up call.
 
2008-03-24 2:14:43 AM  
Oddly, I'm looking forward to the Logan's Run remake.

But Footloose and Fame? See, I've been telling you there is no god!
 
2008-03-24 2:18:41 AM  
1984
Tim Robbins is apparently hunting for the money for a new big screen adaptation of George Orwell's classic and never-more-relevant novel. He's not having much luck though, we're led to believe.


Are you kidding? Even if the film is good, every high school kid will be going "Dude this takes place in the PAST! And everyone knows this stuff didn't happen in 1984! All that happened was... Van Halen and stuff. This movie is dumb!.
 
2008-03-24 2:20:04 AM  
Westworld, hell yes! I'm sure a "Futureworld" movie won't be to far behind as well.

There's a movie starring John Saxon from the 70's I'd like to see remade. I don't remember the name, but the dude takes part in a cryonics experiment then California has the big one. He gets buried, then 500 years later is rediscovered by a new society with magic dildos.
 
2008-03-24 2:20:52 AM  
Wombatzu: if they remake Near Dark i'm gonna hurt someone...

I see I'm not needed here. Hearing about The Last Starfighter pissed me off, but this would take it to a totally new dimension.
 
2008-03-24 2:22:01 AM  
Luckily most of those movies I couldn't give a darn about. I am however interested in Logans Run (I recently watched the original and as much as I hate to admit it, it could use the update or at the very least a George Lucas style re-edit with a replacement for all those horrible models they used in the city scenes.)


& The Birds (Quite honestly who ever attempts to direct will burn in hell. Much like remaking North by Northwest - you cannot screw with teh Master and perfection has already been acheived)
 
2008-03-24 2:22:25 AM  
shinjitsuism: Gesundheit.

Terrific freeze-frame. I love The Taking of Pelham 1-2-3.


I hate the thought of that being remade, but the concept of an Evil Dead or The Warriors remake absolutely sickens me.
 
2008-03-24 2:26:53 AM  
SnarfVader: Oddly, I'm looking forward to the Logan's Run remake.

But Footloose and Fame? See, I've been telling you there is no god!


It would be better if they combined all three movies. Sure it would have all the angst of Footloose and the annoying singing and dancing of Fame but on the positive side they would all be Runners being hunted down by the Sandmen.

It has its own kind of beauty.
 
2008-03-24 2:29:57 AM  
When they make Akira a live action movie, will the third world war still start in 1988? Heh. As for the story, they could make it the same, frame by frame, with awesome new fx and updated fashions and I'd be happy.
 
2008-03-24 2:36:30 AM  
Dirty Dozen could be good actually.

Id hit it.

You know what old movie id like to remake?

Key Largo. The first hostage movie.

it was ground breaking for its time. a RESPECTFUL remake of course

the Brazillian Job got me angry.

the ORIGINAL 1969 version of TIJ was supposed to have a sequel, but it didnt, and ending it on the cliffhanger it did, made it the best ending EVER.

the remake is an insult to us all.

the final scene:

theitalianjob.comView Full Size
 
2008-03-24 2:40:41 AM  
The Birds.

Martin Campbell, prepare to die.
 
2008-03-24 2:47:13 AM  
i say while theyre at it, remake Citizen Kane.

Michael Keaton will play Kane.

Instead of rosebud being the sled, Kane was shot by some crack dealer nicknamed Rosebud. so the FBI has to find him.
just before he dies, he annouces who did it.
 
2008-03-24 2:47:29 AM  
Westworld was perfection. they already got their shiatty remake as Jurrassic Park. Even Futureworld was a helluva more fun than the redo.
 
2008-03-24 3:01:31 AM  
Instead of remaking those movies, how about just rereleasing them in the theaters? Lots cheaper to do and you please existing fans, while getting new fans.
 
2008-03-24 3:08:50 AM  
Do we really need a SECOND remake of "The Thing?"
 
2008-03-24 3:14:03 AM  
WhyteRaven74: Instead of remaking those movies, how about just rereleasing them in the theaters? Lots cheaper to do and you please existing fans, while getting new fans.

because old films, especially ones in black and white are boring.

/the views and comments expressed in the above post are not necessairly those of fark or neruoticrocker.
 
2008-03-24 3:16:34 AM  
i had a friend in one of my film classes who put it best.

"the worst kind of film is the remake. its like rewriting a book!"

i had to laugh hard at his comment.

/funny bc its true
 
2008-03-24 3:16:56 AM  
Mega_Doof: Do we really need a SECOND remake of "The Thing?"

NO! The FIRST remake was excellent! Hollywood stop stealing stolen ideas!
 
2008-03-24 3:19:34 AM  
the remake of The Fly (with goldblum) was actually better than the 1st
 
2008-03-24 3:22:29 AM  
I've said it before, but it bears repeating.

Someone (like Fincher) should remake Strangers on a Train.

Remake outdated movies. You know, the ones with too much pre-60's era smarm.
 
2008-03-24 3:26:08 AM  
Oh, and just in case I get flamed for it later, I love older movies. I love all movies, no matter what the era. But some movies are really hokey in retrospect. In certain situations, like They Live, the campyness works in it's favor, but others leave me wishing it was made in a darker time period.
 
2008-03-24 3:45:47 AM  
The remaking of the Evil Dead movie should be interesting. I mean, since Raimi is still going to be in charge of the movie & since ED 2 was a remake/reimagining of the first film, it should be pretty cool.
 
2008-03-24 4:06:24 AM  
Just thought of a movie that shouldn't be remade, but everyone should see. It's called "The Green Slime". It's beyond awesome.
 
2008-03-24 4:13:09 AM  
Springy23: I've said it before, but it bears repeating.

Someone (like Fincher) should remake Strangers on a Train.

Remake outdated movies. You know, the ones with too much pre-60's era smarm.


I don't know about that. I just saw Strangers on a Train and North by Northwest in the theater a few days ago. Yes, they looked dated but definitely don't need to be remade. Just re-released. The place was packed and everyone seemed to have a great time.

I keep wanting to open a movie house that screens classics. I just don't have the money.

Yet.
 
2008-03-24 4:35:16 AM  
NeuroticRocker: /the views and comments expressed in the above post are not necessairly those of fark or neruoticrocker.

hehehe

GungFu: What it needs is for somebody to release a two-disc dvd

that would so totally rule
 
2008-03-24 4:35:56 AM  
At least they haven't started on an "American Splendor" remake.
 
2008-03-24 4:53:49 AM  
A new Death wish, Stallone as Paul Kersey, WTF is that!

And Conan the barbaria, seriously wtf
 
2008-03-24 5:32:31 AM  
WhyteRaven74: Instead of remaking those movies, how about just rereleasing them in the theaters? Lots cheaper to do and you please existing fans, while getting new fans.


Hey! No stealing my ideas! I've always thought there is a market for showing older movies in theaters. There are tons of movies that are just better on the big screen. I'd buy a ticket to see the original The Birds long before I'd pay to see Drillbit Taylor.

That said, if you're gonna remake a movie, at least include the original on DVD in with the DVD release of your remake. That I could respect as proper homage.
 
2008-03-24 6:01:41 AM  
What about redoing Transformers?
 
2008-03-24 6:23:39 AM  
The Swarm
This is more like it! Lots of bees! Frank Schaetzing's book is plundered again for the big screen, with Silence Of The Lambs adapter Ted Tally on scripting duties. No director or cast yet, though.

ummm... bees? remake? That book is just a few years old and is about sealife

Actually a nice book, but tries too hard to be a hollywood script in my oppinion
 
2008-03-24 6:35:41 AM  
They'll redo them because people will go see them. For the most part these remakes will be thrown together and will either future unknown actors or Hollywood legends such as Ben Afleck and Jessica Simpson.

It appears that the movie industry is all out of original ideas. Soon they'll be working on remakes of films that came out last year.
 
2008-03-24 6:41:06 AM  
There are a few in there I've never heard of, some that I could care less if they get remade and some that Hollywierd should be shot for thinking about doing a remake!

I haven't seen Battle Royale, but have heard a lot about it and REALLY want to see it before hollywierd eff's the whole thing up.
 
2008-03-24 7:00:13 AM  
Footjews: Nobody Puts Bubbie in the Corner
 
2008-03-24 7:00:31 AM  
Former Lee Warmer
I keep wanting to open a movie house that screens classics. I just don't have the money.

There is an old theater here in the town that does that. Its a really great old place but was getting kind of run-down.
They used to show movies for $1 that were about to be released on DVD. The place was mostly empty.

Since they switched to classics, they have shut-down for renovations because it has become so packed and I guess money-making. A lot of the people going to the shows are college and high school age kids so there definitely is an audience.

Hitchcock week was awesome. Can't wait for it to open again.
 
2008-03-24 7:04:25 AM  
Tokyogirl79

The remaking of the Evil Dead movie should be interesting. I mean, since Raimi is still going to be in charge of the movie & since ED 2 was a remake/reimagining of the first film, it should be pretty cool.

Evil Dead 2 was not a remake. Cut out that opening segment that they had and it starts right where the first left off, with him getting hit in the face by the mysterious floating force. For legal reasons, Sam Raimi was unable to obtain permission to use footage from the first movie in order to make a recap at the beginning that would let the audience know what had happened in the first movie. To work around this problem, he re-shot some key scenes from the first, but with a simplified plot. For example, the recap was streamlined to show only Ash and his girlfriend. There thats why its a different opening scene.

Also, in August, Bruce Campbell revealed in a radio interview that the proposed remake was "going nowhere" and "fizzled" due to extremely negative fan reaction.

So this page needs an update.
 
2008-03-24 7:33:30 AM  
Remakes.


Everything has got to be dumbed down for the masses.

Just as Lenny Kravitz is a musical re-make of something original and superior,great classic films have to be ruined in order to appeal to each generations shrinking standards.

Nearly ALL remakes omit the atmosphere,character and warmth of the original and replace it with dazzling CGI/effects and crappy performances. 21st century SLICK ruins 1970s gritty texture.

Here is a list of superb films I predict will get raped in the next few years:

The Friends of Eddie Coyle
Used Cars
Thunderbolt and Lightfoot
Electra Glide in Blue
Two Lane Blacktop
The Wild Bunch
The Good,the Bad and the Ugly
Thief

......and worst of all--Taxi Driver.

Yes,Taxi Driver will someday get re-made.
It will be stripped clean of all the urban alienation and metaphors and replaced with slick action scenes.(Travis will fly through the air with two pistols blazing John Woo style)
Also,the young hooker will be played by a non-talent hot Elisha Cuthbert type actress with plenty of full nude scenes but none of the existentially strange ambiguity in relation to Travis.
It will be sexier and more stupidly obvious.

Mark my words on this one.
Sad.
 
2008-03-24 7:47:13 AM  
How many of these are going to be remakes and how many of these are going to be adaptations of the original source material?
Like Logan's Run; new adaptation of the book, remake of the Michael York movie or *shudders* the TV show?
 
2008-03-24 7:52:16 AM  
There should have been a sequel to The Last Starfighter. Not a stupid remake.
 
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