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(News.com.au)   You know you've thrown a legendary party if your dog overdoses on ecstasy, there's four inches of beer on the floor, and your parents find handcuffs and underwear in your sister's room   (news.com.au) divider line
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2008-03-10 4:08:47 PM  
Around here we would call this Tuesday.

/except for the dog part, wtf is up with drugging the puppy?
 
2008-03-10 4:14:26 PM  
Swap the ecstacy with blodder and it sounds a lot like my old neighborhood circa 1976.
 
2008-03-10 4:16:44 PM  
He managed to teach his dog to roll and play dead at the same time.
 
2008-03-10 4:16:45 PM  
Yeah, that is highly unusual. My sister usually kept her handcuffs and underwear in the back seat of her car.
 
2008-03-10 4:18:19 PM  
4 inches of beer in a living room is almost 500 gallons (12'x15'x4") ... what a waste.
 
2008-03-10 4:19:13 PM  
submitter: your parents find handcuffs and underwear in your sister's room

who says those are from the party?
 
2008-03-10 4:21:27 PM  
vanblah: 4 inches of beer in a living room is almost 500 gallons (12'x15'x4") ... what a waste.

I'd bet money that was beer cans that were spread out all over the floor - no way could that be 4" of standing liquid.
 
2008-03-10 4:25:00 PM  
Mrs Anscomb said she was shocked that her girl could have caused such a mess. She told the Daily Mail Gemma had always been a straight A student.

Someone doesn't know her little snowflake very well, now does she?
 
2008-03-10 4:28:26 PM  
Diogenes: Mrs Anscomb said she was shocked that her girl could have caused such a mess. She told the Daily Mail Gemma had always been a straight A student.

Someone doesn't know her little snowflake very well, now does she?


Parents: smart != prude. Good grades doesn't mean virginal.
 
2008-03-10 4:31:27 PM  
PullItOut: Parents: smart != prude. Good grades doesn't mean virginal.

Oh, so very true. Sometimes it's the smart ones you need to worry about more.
 
2008-03-10 4:53:26 PM  
"What made me more angry was that she refused to come home and face the music and help with the clear-up."

Well at least the mother is focused on the real problem here.
 
2008-03-10 5:08:34 PM  
It's not a party until the kitchen is blue, your grandparents are catatonic in the cupboard, the living room furniture is in the backyard pond and there's a Pershing missile in the middle of the house.
 
2008-03-10 5:11:43 PM  
UberDave: It's not a party until the kitchen is blue, your grandparents are catatonic in the cupboard, the living room furniture is in the backyard pond and there's a Pershing missile in the middle of the house.

Or until the naked guy shows up.
 
2008-03-10 5:21:39 PM  
I liked this article better the first time we discussed it.
 
2008-03-10 5:21:59 PM  
Special Olympic Bronze: vanblah: 4 inches of beer in a living room is almost 500 gallons (12'x15'x4") ... what a waste.

I'd bet money that was beer cans that were spread out all over the floor - no way could that be 4" of standing liquid.


Possibly if they had a sunken living room or a split level, but that would take several kegs.
 
2008-03-10 5:23:17 PM  
img357.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
Ral
2008-03-10 5:23:30 PM  
I can't help but notice the common theme of "teen goes into hiding", as if they're independent adults with their own jobs, homes, etc. Why do the parents tolerate that shiat? You call the cops and drag their ass home.

This girl's parents are shocked that "their girl" could do something like this? That's half the problem right there -- their cluelessness.
 
2008-03-10 5:24:13 PM  
But Gemma, who drank to excess and passed out at 7:30pm

What a lightweight... and good chance she got a train pulled on her.
 
2008-03-10 5:24:23 PM  
"I have done everything I can to bring her up properly. But I must have gone wrong somewhere."

Mother at least sounds reasonable. Should just disown the little biatch.
 
2008-03-10 5:24:48 PM  
Dare I?
WTF - The Aristocrats!
 
2008-03-10 5:25:27 PM  
UberDave: It's not a party until the kitchen is blue, your grandparents are catatonic in the cupboard, the living room furniture is in the backyard pond and there's a Pershing missile in the middle of the house.

Don't forget the mutants and motorcycles.

Gary, Wyatt and Chett unavailable for comment.
 
2008-03-10 5:25:30 PM  
littlett's: Possibly if they had a sunken living room or a split level, but that would take several kegs.

Sounds like the living room WAS sunken!! AMIRITE??
 
2008-03-10 5:25:31 PM  
mrbean70: He managed to teach his dog to roll and play dead at the same time.

FTW.

However, yeah, this is a repeat.
 
2008-03-10 5:25:55 PM  
Special Olympic Bronze: no way could that be 4" of standing liquid.

It could be. You know what they say, "Drink one can, pee twelve."
 
Ral
2008-03-10 5:25:55 PM  
UberDave: It's not a party until the kitchen is blue, your grandparents are catatonic in the cupboard, the living room furniture is in the backyard pond and there's a Pershing missile in the middle of the house.

For some reason it was that part that made me LOL.

[image from servicepals.com too old to be available]
 
2008-03-10 5:26:09 PM  
Treygreen13: I liked this article better the first time we discussed it.

yep
 
2008-03-10 5:26:24 PM  
awesome
 
2008-03-10 5:26:37 PM  
That's nothing. You should have seen my 19th birthday party. There were 3 12 packs of Milwaukie's Best and a pint of Captain Morgan's. There must have been at least nine of us. We barely fit in the living room of my stepdad's house!
Oh man, we were all laughing and junk. It was so much fun.
 
2008-03-10 5:27:01 PM  
5000_gallons_of_toothpaste: UberDave: It's not a party until the kitchen is blue, your grandparents are catatonic in the cupboard, the living room furniture is in the backyard pond and there's a Pershing missile in the middle of the house.

Or until the naked guy biker gang shows up.


FTFY.
=Smidge=
 
2008-03-10 5:27:15 PM  
dryknife: Dare I?
WTF - The Aristocrats!


LOL!
 
xav
2008-03-10 5:27:24 PM  
Dude, she's 8. Handcuffs won't fit, you need to use nylon rope.
 
2008-03-10 5:27:28 PM  
 
2008-03-10 5:27:34 PM  
img.dailymail.co.ukView Full Size

The guilty party.
 
2008-03-10 5:27:35 PM  
It happened in England so the dog just passed out from exhaustion from having to eat so many pills.
 
2008-03-10 5:27:58 PM  
Dogs and rolling do go together, but they were doing it wrong.
 
2008-03-10 5:28:03 PM  
If I did that, my mom would track me down and beat me to death. There would be a follow up article on fark about it.
 
2008-03-10 5:28:10 PM  
My sister usually kept her handcuffs and underwear in the back seat of her car.


My car, actually.
 
2008-03-10 5:28:27 PM  
Meh.

here's a cat on LSD (new window)
 
2008-03-10 5:29:13 PM  
RokuSanNi: The guilty party.

Going to hell in 3..2..
 
2008-03-10 5:29:50 PM  
Sounds like my family's last reunion.

/Irish and French Canadian Catholics.
//And southern White Trash.
 
2008-03-10 5:29:55 PM  
RokuSanNi: The guilty party.

*checks ageofconsent.com*

I'd wait a year, and then hit it.
 
2008-03-10 5:30:08 PM  
Smidge204: FTFY.
=Smidge=


PCU.

"Even the naked guy showed up."
"Hey! Naked guy! Now its a party!"
 
2008-03-10 5:30:27 PM  
onmilwaukee.comView Full Size

Amateurs.
 
2008-03-10 5:30:41 PM  
Question for those in the know.

What CAN the parents really do to her? Here in the USA, you can't beat her ass (child abuse), you can't really ground them, you can't kick them out of the house. Can you call the cops and press charges on your own sub 18 child? Perhaps some time behind bars might sober her up to how good she really had it before.
 
2008-03-10 5:31:05 PM  
I swear this story was on FARK a few days ago. What the hell, dude?
 
2008-03-10 5:31:21 PM  
Ral: I can't help but notice the common theme of "teen goes into hiding", as if they're independent adults with their own jobs, homes, etc. Why do the parents tolerate that shiat? You call the cops and drag their ass home.

I would never want to see a child of mine again if they did this. For one I wouldn't be able to control my anger. And here is the consequence of your complete disregard for the rest of the family, you are no longer a member of it.
 
2008-03-10 5:32:25 PM  
BlorfMaster:

Meh.

here's a cat on LSD (new window)


Jesus. That was messed up.
 
2008-03-10 5:32:45 PM  
Murphy's Corollary: Question for those in the know.

What CAN the parents really do to her? Here in the USA, you can't beat her ass (child abuse), you can't really ground them, you can't kick them out of the house. Can you call the cops and press charges on your own sub 18 child? Perhaps some time behind bars might sober her up to how good she really had it before.


Send their ass to military/boarding school.
 
2008-03-10 5:33:17 PM  
drevil877: "What made me more angry was that she refused to come home and face the music and help with the clear-up."

Well at least the mother is focused on the real problem here.


Ummm, shouldn't she be working to pay off the damages and stolen stuff? The only way you learn the value of property is by having to work for it.
 
2008-03-10 5:34:19 PM  
Approves of UpperDave

knobtweakers.netView Full Size
 
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