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(Omaha World Herald)   Ted Turner says he doesn't want to buy all the land in the contiguous United States -- just everything that touches the 1,960,000 acres he already owns   (omaha.com) divider line
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    More: Scary  
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15289 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Feb 2008 at 8:58 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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birkin
2008-02-07 8:59:33 PM  
and he criticizes capitalism? shades of jack london.
 
boxster
2008-02-07 9:01:25 PM  
Submitter obviously didn't read the article. His goal is two million, only 40,000 more than his current total.
 
TeddyRooseveltsMustache
2008-02-07 9:02:08 PM  
What's he gonna do, start his own nation?
 
clowncar on fire
2008-02-07 9:02:15 PM  
I don't want to own the whole world- just your half!
 
musmatta
2008-02-07 9:02:19 PM  
Seems like a cool guy.
 
ChuableVicodin
2008-02-07 9:02:24 PM  
Watch out, he's fixin' to colorize the land!
 
Tackboard
2008-02-07 9:03:07 PM  
TeddyRooseveltsMustache: What's he gonna do, start his own nation?

He's raising the largest herd of bison in the USA...Boy does those bison steaks taste good
 
Aye Carumba
2008-02-07 9:04:27 PM  
"You know what 2 million acres is?" Turner asked over a plate of bison miniburgers and transfat-free onion rings. "If my land was all connected, in one long straight line, a mile deep, it would stretch from New York to San Francisco."


Holy crap!
 
Number41
2008-02-07 9:05:19 PM  
Square mile = 640 acres
2 million acres = just over 3000 sq miles
Delaware = just under 2500 sq miles.

Christ, that's a lot of land.
 
Richard Pye
2008-02-07 9:05:41 PM  
His fortune, upward of $7 billion at one point, has shrunk to between $1 billion and $2 billion, he said. Part of that decline is due to a record $1 billion gift to the United Nations.

He could have sent some money my way. Christ, what an asswipe.
 
McManus_brothers
2008-02-07 9:07:37 PM  
"Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm going to colorize the Moon."

/obscure?
 
luckychipin
2008-02-07 9:14:23 PM  
I wonder if he is working with a crazy realtor lady with big sunglasses and a huge floppy hat who drives around with a license plate frame that says...

Consult a Realtor
 
Gelatinous
2008-02-07 9:15:04 PM  
He can deny it all he wants, but the politically savvy ultra-rich are buying property located on top of major aquifers.
 
HumbleGenius
2008-02-07 9:16:00 PM  
Can anyone draw on a map approximately how much land he owns?
 
Secret Master of All Flatulence
2008-02-07 9:16:45 PM  
I hope the places he owns land in pass a "Ted Turner Property Tax Increase", mandating that anybody who owns more than 1 million acres of land has to pay 50 times the going tax rate each year.
 
netcentric
2008-02-07 9:16:58 PM  
Mmmmmmm....buffalo burgers at Ted's Burger Shack.


/wave of the future
 
ejunkie
2008-02-07 9:18:13 PM  
When you say two million acres it sounds like a lot, but if you take 3125 square miles and make it one big sqare, it'd take less than an hour to drive east to west through its 55.9 mile length width. (or height)
 
kilgorn
2008-02-07 9:19:23 PM  
Maybe he's going to rent some land to the bureaucrats at the UN who lined their pockets with that $1B boondoggle

/but he won't share/sell water rights with his neighbors
 
lcmino
2008-02-07 9:20:06 PM  
Does anybody else kind of feel bad for the guy? I mean he used to be one of tose people involved in every conspiracy theory about the "New World Order" and now the dudes just trying to get more beef on to the menu at a few restaurants

//But the bison is good
//mmmmmm brink of extinction om nom nom nom
 
hyperspacemonkey
2008-02-07 9:20:20 PM  
FTA:Then he joked: "I've been thinking about doing some swaps. I'd be able to cut the United States in half and charge people from going from the north to the south."

HAHAHAHAAHahahaha...hahaha...haha..hooo...ummmm...

...yeah.

The UN considers the Dali Lama to be the a national political leader for less tangible power than this dude has.
 
p51d007
2008-02-07 9:20:27 PM  
I wish he would just drop dead. Mouth of the south is an understatement. He's such a loony tunes person.
And I wonder what his buddies in PETA think about his MEAT ranches?
 
Drannon
2008-02-07 9:22:04 PM  
He owns about as much land as Delaware and Rhode Island combined.
 
Lifeless
2008-02-07 9:26:13 PM  
p51d007: I wish he would just drop dead. Mouth of the south is an understatement. He's such a loony tunes person.

And what would you do with all that money? Something much less awesome than bison ranching, I'd presume.
 
Xandar
2008-02-07 9:28:41 PM  
HumbleGenius: Can anyone draw on a map approximately how much land he owns?

img509.imageshack.usView Full Size


Hope this helps

/not to scale
//maybe not even close
///I think it's close
////approximately 1.1 times Delaware and Rhode Island combined
 
Drannon
2008-02-07 9:28:58 PM  
He owns about as much land as Delaware and Rhode Island combined, but in the grand scheme of things:

[image from pages.drexel.edu too old to be available]


It's a lot, but its not that much.
 
Szech
2008-02-07 9:29:07 PM  
Doesn't he know real estate is tanking?


Ted, you can't flip that for 8 billion. You missed the peak, man. You missed the peak.
 
Drannon
2008-02-07 9:30:11 PM  
Xandar,

I hate you.
 
Drannon
2008-02-07 9:30:53 PM  
At least mine is to scale. :p
 
kilgorn
2008-02-07 9:31:02 PM  
Does anyone else remember his Channel 17 in Atlanta when
it played songs to slide show pictures ALL day?

/Can't listen to "Long and Winding Road" to this day
 
sunbird
2008-02-07 9:31:47 PM  
Scary? Why? He's not planning to use the land to achieve world domination, he's simply farming tasty animals.

/hmmm, world domination.
 
archerjoe
2008-02-07 9:33:48 PM  
I guess he's a fan of Bomani Armah.

/He's not a fan of spinnin' rims
 
ShouldBeStudying
2008-02-07 9:35:02 PM  
He owns land in the middle-of-nowhere in North Florida too. I have no idea why he would want to have property outside of Perry.
 
Xandar
2008-02-07 9:35:17 PM  
Drannon: At least mine is to scale. :p

But mine was made is MS Paint so . . .

:p :p

/:p
 
pentachris
2008-02-07 9:35:54 PM  
The "Mouth of the South" might be mellowing, at least in terms of his appetite for ranchland in Nebraska.

static.flickr.comView Full Size


Mellow?
 
Drannon
2008-02-07 9:36:03 PM  
Xandar,

So was mine!
 
whammer
2008-02-07 9:36:15 PM  
The XIT Ranch in Texas used to be 3,000,000 acres.

And reassuringly, the owners of the XIT, like Ted Turner, were a rotten group of scoundrels up to no good, utterly ruthless in their land grabbing and indifferent to the common good or the needs of others.

And reassuringly, Ted Turner's brilliant scheme is going to end up as lunch for the bigger and meaner fish in the pond. Just like the XIT.
 
Xandar
2008-02-07 9:36:25 PM  
Mine was made using not is

CRAP
 
Sir Roderick Glossop
2008-02-07 9:39:54 PM  
clowncar on fire: I don't want to own the whole world- just your half!

You don't need me here!
 
rlbgator
2008-02-07 9:40:48 PM  
clowncaronfire - i get it!
 
president of new danistan
2008-02-07 9:47:11 PM  
Xandar, that would be a great map...too bad you put the land he owns in Kansas. I'd make fun of you more, but flyover country is easy to mix up. Plus, you never said that this is where the land actually is, you just showed us what the size is equal to.
 
FLMountainMan
2008-02-07 9:52:15 PM  
Number41: Square mile = 640 acres
2 million acres = just over 3000 sq miles
Delaware = just under 2500 sq miles.

Christ, that's a lot of land.

Yeah, but Delaware is extremely small. St. Joe's Paper Company, until the 50's or so, owned land in Florida that amounted to almost two Delawares and even until (and I'm recalling these facts from memory, so theyt may be inexact) the 90's owned 3% of Florida. 3% Doesn't sound like much, but it is. Ted's using it for (mainly) conservation and obtained it all legally, so good for him. Better he than ADM, ConAg, or Shady Oaks Suburban Golf Course Development Company
 
Bob55
2008-02-07 9:53:14 PM  
tedturner.comView Full Size
 
scotus
2008-02-07 9:53:26 PM  
gullyborg.typepad.comView Full Size
 
KrustAsian
2008-02-07 9:55:52 PM  
Wait, didn't Turner die a couple months ago?
 
Donald_McRonald
2008-02-07 9:57:55 PM  
KrustAsian: Wait, didn't Turner die a couple months ago?

That was Ike Turner.
 
Fool_Marquis
2008-02-07 10:02:00 PM  
Item: A small group of people could, conceivably, set up an underground facility on his property, then use that to launch covert strikes against the united states...

Orrrr i could have just read too many eco-terrorist novels.

Whichever.
 
Smellvin
2008-02-07 10:14:54 PM  
Part of that decline is due to a record $1 billion gift to the United Nations.

Ted Turner's thought process: What could I do with a billion dollars?... I think I'd like to give it to charity, but it's not like it could be better used to feed children, as grant money to start businesses in third world countries, as research money for diseases, or seed money for a charity. Instead, let's just flush it down the toilet that is international bureaucracy! This should fund at least fifty non-binding resolutions!
 
EdNortonsTwin
2008-02-07 10:15:35 PM  
Did this headline just Godwin itself???
 
Dobbler
2008-02-07 10:18:23 PM  
He just wants more farm subsidies.
 
MuToiD_MaN
2008-02-07 10:24:06 PM  
I'll always think of him as Captaiiiiinnn Plllaaanet!!! thanks to Robot Chicken.
 
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