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(Breitbart.com)   Actual headline: "Russians open up new front in British-German sunbed war." In related news, there is a British-German sunbed war   (breitbart.com) divider line
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4188 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Feb 2008 at 12:44 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



49 Comments     (+0 »)
 
kingMountain
2008-02-07 12:04:09 PM  
We shall defend our sunbeds, whatever the cost may be, we shall put on the lotion, we shall put on the small towel, we shall put on the tiny sunglasses and close the lid, we shall lay down for 20 minutes; we shall never stop tanning.
 
kingMountain
2008-02-07 12:07:18 PM  
oops, i thought a sunbed was a tanning bed; oh well
 
relmar
2008-02-07 12:47:18 PM  
kingMountain wins, thread over.
 
Smellvin
2008-02-07 12:47:56 PM  
The Germans might besiege Leningrad, Moscow, and Stalingrad with their sunbeds, but before you know it the Russians will have done all the work and pushed the Germans back to Berlin.
 
GoodOmens
2008-02-07 12:48:35 PM  
kingMountain: oops, i thought a sunbed was a tanning bed; oh well

Heh PWNED by failure to RTFA
 
iamnin69
2008-02-07 12:49:25 PM  
They really dont like Russian tourists in most of those places the article mentions.
 
Icon-Cat
2008-02-07 12:49:50 PM  
You know who ELSE liked to conduct war between the British and the Germans?
 
Donald_McRonald
2008-02-07 12:50:27 PM  
In related news, there is a British-German sunbed war

Footage of the victims is particularly gruesome:
thesuperficial.comView Full Size
 
ultimatedrivingmachine
2008-02-07 12:51:38 PM  
Wow, another group of pasty-white people fighting over lounge chairs to become sunburned? what is the world coming to?
 
daffy
2008-02-07 12:52:09 PM  
Wait, Brits sunbath? Why do they always look so pasty?
 
Kar98
2008-02-07 12:52:11 PM  
Begun, zee sunbed vars haff.
 
fatal_exception
2008-02-07 12:53:02 PM  
I don't get it. Brits must be total pussies. When I'm on vacation and see that someone has staked out a lounger like that I just toss the towel aside and drag the lounger down to the beach.

It's not their lounger or their towel. Fark that noise.
 
wowzer97pooh
2008-02-07 12:54:07 PM  
Plenty of sunbeds available here.

[image from blackpoolaccommodation.org.uk too old to be available]
 
Manfred J. Hattan
2008-02-07 12:54:31 PM  
In this version it's the Americans who initiate the battle of the bulge.
 
kc987654
2008-02-07 12:54:31 PM  
I thought the Von Ribbentrop-Molotof sunbed pact had this already sewn up?
 
Ninja Wicked
2008-02-07 12:54:38 PM  
Oh god this will get ugly, why cant those two a century without starting a war which will devastate Europe
 
kc987654
2008-02-07 12:55:07 PM  
kc987654: I thought the Von Ribbentrop-Molotof sunbed pact had this already sewn up?

Molotov
 
The Devil's Left Hand
2008-02-07 12:55:11 PM  
I've got nothing worthwhile to add to this serious debate, so here's a picture of a hot russian (Olga Kurylenko):

img173.imagevenue.comView Full Size
 
Compulsive Liar 1986
2008-02-07 12:56:08 PM  
calm down folks, there's enough skin cancer for everybody.
 
Oznog
2008-02-07 12:59:47 PM  
Know who else...

naw, that's too easy.
 
gorgor
2008-02-07 1:00:12 PM  
When their back looks like cottage cheese on a ceiling vent, they can have it.
 
groverpm
2008-02-07 1:02:51 PM  
daffy: Wait, Brits sunbath? Why do they always look so pasty?

Of course Brits sunbath. How else would they get that lovely beetroot red tan so redolent of Brits abroad.
 
Shooter_McGavin
2008-02-07 1:04:58 PM  
Now, THAT is news.

/sarcasm
 
limeyfellow
2008-02-07 1:05:21 PM  
Damn right there is. Those damn crouts wait till we have a hangover and then sneak out early in the morning and put all their towels on every sunchair. Spain is our battlefield in this war and the Germans must be defeated once and for all.
 
pjc51
2008-02-07 1:05:48 PM  
Indeed
 
POTUS
2008-02-07 1:06:09 PM  
This guy needs his sunbed!!

img204.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
goplano
2008-02-07 1:13:33 PM  
Hot War?
 
Bondith
2008-02-07 1:16:09 PM  
kc987654
Molotov

Mmm, cocktails.
 
Cyborg77
2008-02-07 1:25:49 PM  
We must all be willing to lay down our towels in defense of the Motherland.

/One skin cancer death is a tragedy, a million is a statistic
 
Mega Steve
2008-02-07 1:28:34 PM  
Wake me up when the Japanese start stealing U.S. chairs.
 
Johann65
2008-02-07 1:28:56 PM  
limeyfellow: Damn right there is. Those damn crouts wait till we have a hangover and then sneak out early in the morning and put all their towels on every sunchair. Spain is our battlefield in this war and the Germans must be defeated once and for all.

Crouts???

/just soak 'em with a little olive oil and red wine vinegar
 
studebaker hoch
2008-02-07 1:30:11 PM  
There's a simple way to avoid the issue.

The resorts should just say "no reserving spots with towels".

Or "any spot left unattended for more than 5 minutes is considered open"

Towels on it or not.

/of course, you'll still get assholes disregarding the rules anyway.
 
limeyfellow
2008-02-07 1:31:41 PM  
See that is what the Germans do. They are unreasonable and then they complain just because we vomit over their girlfriends and kick them in the nuts before passing out. There is no pleasing them.
 
The Voice of Doom
2008-02-07 1:34:02 PM  
*puts his towel on this post so he can comment here after coming back from RTFA*
 
Pontus and the Nail Drivers
2008-02-07 1:36:58 PM  
Is there anything more tragic than beautiful alabaster skin scorched by a tanning bed? I think not. Ladies, ladies, ladies...please stop. There's a reason those things are shaped like coffins.
 
King Keepo
2008-02-07 1:45:38 PM  
studebaker hoch: /of course, you'll still get assholes disregarding the rules anyway.

Yup, they're called "Germans".

*sprinkles sand on The Voice of Doom's towel and cracks another lager*
 
brantgoose [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2008-02-07 1:47:39 PM  
If we let them get away with this, the tourists win.
 
jboomgaarden
2008-02-07 1:52:15 PM  
studebaker hoch: I feel really bad for you that you were so incredibly bored that devised a solution to this "problem". I would start drinking now if I were you.
 
jboomgaarden
2008-02-07 2:00:10 PM  
*giggles* two people that talk funnay fighting over a chair
 
Weji Atreides
2008-02-07 2:02:49 PM  
This thread is useless without more pics of these so called amazing Sunbeds...

/Free Foobies for everyone!!!
 
BasqueBastard
2008-02-07 2:10:03 PM  
I get a kick out of being President & signing the sunbed Lend-Lease Act.
 
guidoanselmi
2008-02-07 2:26:58 PM  
siberianlight.netView Full Size


VS

media1.break.comView Full Size

(don't mind the face paint...)
VS

img.thesun.co.ukView Full Size


This will be ugly, but my bets on Putty.

//DNRTFA
 
HoratioGates
2008-02-07 2:37:17 PM  
How much would it really cost, if there is a shortage, for hotels to make sure there are enough sunbeds for everyone? If only they folded up or something so that the extras could be stored when demand was low.
 
kingMountain
2008-02-07 2:44:02 PM  
GoodOmens: Heh PWNED by failure to RTFA

ain't got time to read.
 
The Voice of Doom
2008-02-07 3:04:28 PM  
HoratioGates
How much would it really cost, if there is a shortage, for hotels to make sure there are enough sunbeds for everyone? If only they folded up or something so that the extras could be stored when demand was low.

The problem likely is the room needed to put up the unfolded ones when demand is high..
 
dc-kid
2008-02-07 3:09:58 PM  
studebaker hoch:
Or "any spot left unattended for more than 5 minutes is considered open"
Towels on it or not.

worst idea ever.

what if you had to take a piss and the bathroom was on the other side of the hotel lobby, and while your up and at'em, decide to stop by the bar for a water or beer. there's your 5 minutes
 
studebaker hoch
2008-02-07 4:01:55 PM  
Actually, I have *seen* the "no saving spots with towels" signs already.

They are univerally ignored, by assholes.

A cool resort would enforce it. That way, you get humans in the chairs instead of towels all day. But how could they do it, move your stuff? Then comes the accusations of theft, missing purses/cameras etc. So the resorts just do nothing.

A real answer? Go to resorts that are classy enough to actually have enough seating for their guests.
 
studebaker hoch
2008-02-07 4:03:20 PM  
jboomgaarden

I would start drinking now if I were you.

Way ahead of you.
 
studebaker hoch
2008-02-07 6:19:16 PM  
This guy had the winning idea

/note: this link is certified 100% rick-roll free.
 
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