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(Gazette Net)   Assistant high school football coach suspended after giving player "a shot to his padded ass"   ( gazettenet.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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60 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Oct 2002 at 4:46 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

29 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-10-21 04:57:15 PM  
Waaaa, farking waaaa.

It sounds like the only person who had a problem is the principal. Probably has a fat ass no one would want to spank.
2002-10-21 05:00:22 PM  
"padded ass" was the best spin this guy could put on it? What was the first version, "well muscled young rump"?
2002-10-21 05:01:18 PM  
here in alabama where football is a religion, (such as catholicism, baptism, football) one of my old HS football coaches choked a player and slapped him on the back of the head b/c the player fumbled the ball. punching a player in the ass is nothing. bah! amateurs
2002-10-21 05:01:53 PM  
I thought this was an accepted practice for sports teams. Why the uproar?
2002-10-21 05:05:34 PM  
He slapped his padded ass to see if he was a tight end.
2002-10-21 05:07:57 PM  
I played in Florida, where football is big. This is a load of crap, so the kid probably got a swift kick to the ass, big deal. It's football, not knitting or tiddleywinks. Kid probably had it coming.
2002-10-21 05:10:36 PM  
Give that coach an asshat (and I still can't figgure out what an asshat is ?!?!).
2002-10-21 05:12:53 PM  
I particularly like how this article starts off like journalism, and slowly melts into a moral lesson. By the end of it, I felt like I was being lectured on good manners.
2002-10-21 05:14:31 PM  
Absolute bullplop.
2002-10-21 05:24:48 PM  
2002-10-21 05:35:14 PM  
What parent, when allowing or (more probably, because footbal practise is Hell) encouraging their child to play such a violent, injury-prone sport would complain about a "shot to the ass", whatever that is?
2002-10-21 05:37:58 PM  
What's next? A player getting suspended for slapping another player's ass after a great play?

farkin dumbass principal bizzach.
2002-10-21 06:10:26 PM  
I don't feel like I got a good picture of either side of the story from the article, but I can assure you of this: if that coach had struck a player again that player's parents would have sued the principal and school district for mad money and won.

More generally, killing Mexicans was a tolerable activity 150 years ago in the US. Should it never have been made officially criminal because "that's the way my paw always done things"?

Suppose the kid didn't want to be kicked in the ass, padded or not? I doubt that he signed off for that sort of thing. What do you Mike Jordan would have done if he got a shot in the ass from his coach for turning over the ball? I doubt a "thank you" would have been the follow-up.

What if your boss slapped you around a little for jamming the copier? It would be a criminal offense; your boss would be taking a little trip to central booking. Hey, the kid had no reason to be struck from the coach. Players hit you all the time because those are the rules of the game, but never by officials or coaching staff. It's a simple criminal offense. Honestly, the coach got off lucky in just being fired.
2002-10-21 06:12:55 PM  
I hate how non sports people get to make the rules for sports people.
2002-10-21 06:17:04 PM  
I played in Minnesota where football is a whim (like choosing macaroni and cheese, instead of mashed potatos), and I got that on a daily basis. Mostly because I sucked.
2002-10-21 06:22:13 PM  
sleepy-giant you know absolutely d!ck about High school football.
2002-10-21 06:23:15 PM  
I totally agree with Sleepy_Giant

You also have to wonder how good this coach, and coaches in general are if they have to resort to taking physical action against their own players just to get their attention.
2002-10-21 06:28:51 PM  
sleepy-giant you know absolutely d!ck about High school football.

Maybe so, Artemis, but I know a bit about law. What's your point?
2002-10-21 06:29:23 PM  
1) The principal was doing her job, whether it sucks or not. If the school policy (which was probably set by the superintendant or school board) says staff can't hit kids, then her job is to enforce it. Pretty simple.

Beyond that, if she did nothing and the kid sued, she'd be liable, not to mention fired. Also pretty simple.

Her job is to be in charge. When you're in charge, you're in charge. End of story. A football coach should be the first person to understand that and agree with it.

2) Either being smacked on the ass is a legitimate part of football or it isn't.

I saw it isn't. Football is a sport, not gay porn. Gay porn has its place, I'm sure, but probably not in a high school football game.

In any case, US football will always be a sad sport until they let the clock run. Get on the field, get off, and play, for crying out loud. Stopping everything every forty seconds is weak lazy crap. You get more athletic action in some Asian legislatures.
2002-10-21 06:31:19 PM  
Agreed Thornhill. The general reaction to Sprewal's choking of his own coach was that the guy is a lunatic and should be ejected from the NBA. Now a coach kicks a high school player and these guys think the kid should suck it up? I think the kid should beat the coach's ass, personally. I think firing the guy is a close second.

And before you fire back, Artemis, please try to have a point to make that's relevant to the topic.
2002-10-21 06:55:58 PM  
When did it become illegal to kill Mexicans? Damn, there go my plans for this weekend.
2002-10-21 06:57:44 PM  
Well maybe we can talk some of these guys into football gear so we can kick them in the asses instead?
2002-10-21 07:05:21 PM  
"Men, football is war. God, I love it so..." (Bloom County)
2002-10-21 07:49:22 PM  
My first thought about this headline was "a shot of WHAT?!" I don't know where my brain is sometimes...
2002-10-21 08:00:24 PM  
Ok, never did the article say that the coached booted the player in the ass, it said he smacked him in the padded ass. Ok, So, booting someone may not be common practice, but I interpreted it as saying he got a pat on the ass, such as the one you would get after making a decent play. This is common practice in highschool football, as well as college, and even proffesional. Hell, I'd even venture to say that it is seen in professional basketball as well. Sounds to me like the player was on a power trip, especially when he told the coach that he was going to recieve a phone call and even gave him a set time.
2002-10-21 08:26:16 PM  
Though school officials won't discuss the incident, citing confidentiality issues, Lamanna said his firing was triggered when he gave the player "a shot to his padded ass" after scuffling with him on the field.


I think it's clear that the coach gave the kid a little more than a "pat on the ass". The coach probably wacked him pretty hard A) because he reminded people that the kid was wearing padding; B) because they had a scuffle - whatever the gesture was, it wasn't supportive; and C) because he didn't say that he patted him - why else would the coach be so vague about what he did?

If anyone was on a power trip, it was the coach. He obviously thought that he could get away with "hitting" a player because *he is* the coach. As Sleepy_Giant pointed out, just because you're on the football field doesn't mean society's rules and people's rights are suddenly void.
2002-10-21 10:44:22 PM  
He should coach at our school. Here, the volleyball coach can call the girls farking losers and not get suspended.

Talk about Asshats!!!
2002-10-22 01:58:51 AM  
Hey, I grew up like 5-10 minutes from there, this is my local paper...first time I've seen something local on Fark since the gas station fire extinguisher spoogingm:)

Hey, those of us not within 10 minutes of a sniper shooting location gotta get excited over something...
2002-10-22 12:47:51 PM  
what a poorly written article.
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