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(Gazette.com)   Hot wings place in Colorado hires a guy to stand outside in a chicken suit; city forces owner to have the guy in the chicken suit hold a flag to "maintan the town's mountain grandeur." With snowy chicken-suited photo goodness   (gazette.com) divider line
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    More: Dumbass  
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34686 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2008 at 7:15 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



171 Comments     (+0 »)


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King Something [TotalFark]
2008-01-14 2:26:51 PM  
myteespot.comView Full Size
 
faxinator
2008-01-14 2:35:19 PM  
I love vacationing in Colorado in the winter. However, Woodland Park is not Breckenridge, so leave Chicken Man alone.
 
whyworry
2008-01-14 2:35:40 PM  
FTA: Chicken Man would not comment. Said Branden: "He does not talk. He's a chicken."

Lisa Branden FTW
 
noYOUare
2008-01-14 2:37:35 PM  
Well, they blew up the Chicken Man in Philly last night...
 
SpinStopper
2008-01-14 4:00:18 PM  
He's everywhere! He's everywhere!

[image from i7.tinypic.com too old to be available]
 
birdmanesq
2008-01-14 4:07:40 PM  
I've heard it said that Katharine Lee Bates's original lyrics were going to read: "Oh beautiful for spacious skies, for dudes in chicken suits, for purple mountain majesty, above the fruited plain."

/Majestic indeed.
 
cheshirecatsmileyface
2008-01-14 4:18:06 PM  
Chickens always make me think of:

Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you?
You don't act like the other chickens do.
You wear a disguise to look like human guys
but you're not a man you're a chicken, Boo....
 
noYOUare
2008-01-14 4:31:54 PM  
birdmanesq: above the fruited plain."

Dude, that doesn't even RHYME.
 
Chuck Wagon
2008-01-14 4:44:56 PM  
http://www.subservientchicken.com? (new window)
 
Sensei Can You See [TotalFark]
2008-01-14 4:45:11 PM  
noYOUare: birdmanesq: above the fruited plain."

Dude, that doesn't even RHYME.

How about:

Oh beautiful for spacious skies
For dudes in chicken suits
For purple mountain's majesty
Above the plain of fruits

/no, wait--that would be San Francisco
 
birdmanesq
2008-01-14 5:05:34 PM  
noYOUare: Dude, that doesn't even RHYME.

I know, that's why she decided to go with the other thing. But in her honor, I always sing the original version.
 
Cagey B
2008-01-14 6:12:45 PM  
Why, why must you force me to be the Reading Comprehension Gestapo, subby?

The city didn't force Chicken Man to carry the flag, the owner had Chicken Man carry the flag as a form of protest. The city's asshattery extends to other areas, including drafting an ordinance that would limit costumed characters to 90 days of display a year (WTF?).

As it stands, if the city wanted to really ante up the PR battle, they would advertise their location as a Furry Free Speech Zone, and have them hold up their own signs advertising city services and whatnot. Preferably those guys that wear the crotchless panda suits.

I predict the city's effort at curtailing the activities of costumed characters would benefit from this plan.
 
Control_this
2008-01-14 7:05:01 PM  
[image from koaa.com too old to be available]

Aint nothing more patriotic than a chicken selling beer. I love this country.
 
Boobies!!!
2008-01-14 7:18:26 PM  
A nice town would secondarytan the town's mountain grandeur.
 
Europa312
2008-01-14 7:19:03 PM  
I live close to Woodland Park and love the chicken. I only wish ALL the businesses would get mascots.

As for "Mountain Grandeur"- the place has fake palm tress and a Wal-Mart. I think that's out the window.
 
JonnyBGoode
2008-01-14 7:20:34 PM  
What does a flag have to do with "mountain grandeur"?
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:22:01 PM  
"It's a funky town. It's a funky chicken."

win.
 
jjorsett
2008-01-14 7:22:03 PM  
It says if it is not specifically permitted, it is specifically prohibited."

Looks like government has finally figured out how to regulate all behavior. And economically too. Oops, I'm probably violating the law, since making snarky Fark comments aren't specifically permitted.
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:23:51 PM  
JonnyBGoode: What does a flag have to do with "mountain grandeur"?

nothing. TFA the council doesn't like the chicken with or without the flag. it's downright unamerican - "the law "does not say specifically that costumed characters are not allowed. It says if it is not specifically permitted, it is specifically prohibited." a big BULLSHIAT on that.
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:24:51 PM  
doofusgumby: "It's a funky town. It's a funky chicken."

win.

PS now I have that damn K-TEL commercial running through my head. MAKE IT STOP!
 
mathmonkey
2008-01-14 7:24:57 PM  
JonnyBGoode: What does a flag have to do with "mountain grandeur"?

My guess is she's trying to make it like tossing the chicken is unpatriotic.
 
kenposan
2008-01-14 7:26:12 PM  
If this is her main source of advertising, good luck.

/thinks people in animal suites are stupid advertsing
//or dressed as the statue of liberty
 
daveydave
2008-01-14 7:26:49 PM  
Why is Chicken Man forced to hold a flag? I don't get that. Maybe I'm just baked.
 
vudukungfu [TotalFark]
2008-01-14 7:27:01 PM  
doofusgumby: "the law "does not say specifically that costumed characters are not allowed. It says if it is not specifically permitted, it is specifically prohibited." a big BULLSHIAT on that.

US Code states that. Just like using the americn flag to sell disover cards. YOu may not use it in an advertizement. Same paragraph that prohibits burning it.

On the other hand, given our recent proclivity to enact patiort acts, and create a DHS and TSA, a chicken waving a flag seems appropriate.
/VET.
//Eagle scout.
///Won't give up on my country even if I have given up on my countrymen.
 
KaneB
2008-01-14 7:27:04 PM  
Europa312: I live close to Woodland Park and love the chicken. I only wish ALL the businesses would get mascots.

As for "Mountain Grandeur"- the place has fake palm tress and a Wal-Mart. I think that's out the window.

Fake palm trees? Yeah, they can stop biatching about the chicken RIGHT THE FARK NOW.
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:27:28 PM  
mathmonkey: JonnyBGoode: What does a flag have to do with "mountain grandeur"?

My guess is she's trying to make it like tossing the chicken is unpatriotic.

BUT if it was a chicken SALAD, would tossing it be patriotic?
 
kilgorn
2008-01-14 7:27:37 PM  
Q. Does the mayor own the local KFC?
 
luckybastard
2008-01-14 7:28:12 PM  
Is she trying to say that patriotic American's are chicken?
 
luckybastard
2008-01-14 7:28:52 PM  
Oops. That's "Americans"

Not "American's"
 
Cagey B
2008-01-14 7:29:08 PM  
luckybastard: Is she trying to say that patriotic American's are chicken?

...

NOBODY...calls me..."chicken"
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:30:13 PM  
vudukungfu: doofusgumby: "the law "does not say specifically that costumed characters are not allowed. It says if it is not specifically permitted, it is specifically prohibited." a big BULLSHIAT on that.

US Code states that. Just like using the americn flag to sell disover cards. YOu may not use it in an advertizement. Same paragraph that prohibits burning it.

On the other hand, given our recent proclivity to enact patiort acts, and create a DHS and TSA, a chicken waving a flag seems appropriate.
/VET.
//Eagle scout.
///Won't give up on my country even if I have given up on my countrymen.

wha? US Code? since when is it illegal to burn a flag that you own?

and if it is a law, there's a whole lotta guilty people out there.
 
doofusgumby
2008-01-14 7:31:23 PM  
kenposan: If this is her main source of advertising, good luck.

/thinks people in animal suites are stupid adveritsing
//or dressed as the statue of liberty

animal suites? must be some fancy kennels where you live.
 
mmonnens
2008-01-14 7:32:33 PM  
I am an only child
Born of the wild
Riddled to spend my time
Defending my land

You are the only one
Born in the sun
Riddled to spend your time
Defending my plan

Dead dog on the highway
Median cats are growling at me
I turn my lights on brighter
Im counting through the night ride
And its one more life for the taker
Chickenman chickenman
One more song for the maker
Chickenman chickenman

On the road to athens
I saw a dead deer on the highway
I slipped into a desert
Five prairie dogs and a rabbit

I was running down on queen street
I saw a woman on the sidewalk
(danger danger)
She was beaten by a stranger
(danger danger danger danger)
Danger danger danger
And its one more life for the taker
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand
One more song for the maker
Hold my hand
Chickenman

I was on the road to austin
Met a man on the highway
He sold me junk and conversation
He was wise and dirty from the weather
I said darkness into darkness
All the carnage of my journeys
Makes it harder to be living
He said its a long road to be forgiven
One more life for the taker
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my had
One more song for the maker
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand

I am an only child
Born of the wild
Riddled to spend my time
Defending my land

You are the only one
Born in the sun
Riddled to spend your time
Defending my plan

I went looking for a car
Found myself beneath the stars
I went looking for a girl
Found a man and his world
Chickenman chickenman
(I went looking for a car)
Chickenman hold my hand
(found myself beneath the stars)
Chickenman chickenman
(I went looking for a girl)
Chickenman hold my hand
(found a man and his world)

I am an only child
(chickenman chickenman)
(chickenman hold my hand)
Hold my hand
(chickenman chickenman)
(chickenman hold my hand)
I am an only child
(chickenman chickenman)
(chickenman hold my hand)
Hold my hand
(chickenman chickenman)
(chickenman hold my hand)
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand
Chickenman chickenman
Chickenman hold my hand
 
Cagey B
2008-01-14 7:33:13 PM  
doofusgumby: kenposan: If this is her main source of advertising, good luck.

/thinks people in animal suites are stupid adveritsing
//or dressed as the statue of liberty

animal suites? must be some fancy kennels where you live.

It's where the Scrooge McDuck furry stays when he's in town.
 
Mad Mark
2008-01-14 7:34:05 PM  
hollywoodtoday.netView Full Size

Leave Chicken Man alone!
 
j4s0n
2008-01-14 7:34:21 PM  
doofusgumby: kenposan: If this is her main source of advertising, good luck.

/thinks people in animal suites are stupid adveritsing
//or dressed as the statue of liberty

animal suites? must be some fancy kennels where you live.

Sadly, you'd be suprised..

Link (new window)
 
bugmn99
2008-01-14 7:35:18 PM  
David Buttery, your name makes me want crab legs.
 
herb Tarlek's daughter
2008-01-14 7:36:10 PM  
SpinStopper: He's everywhere! He's everywhere!

I totally remember that! It was hilarious!
 
vudukungfu [TotalFark]
2008-01-14 7:36:22 PM  
doofusgumby:
wha? US Code? since when is it illegal to burn a flag that you own?

and if it is a law, there's a whole lotta guilty people out there.

U S CODE (new window)
and yes, there are a lot of guilty people, corporations, and politicians out there..
 
ScottMpls
2008-01-14 7:36:39 PM  
The manager is obviously a chicken shiat ...

/nothin'
 
UN_SPACEY
2008-01-14 7:39:20 PM  
Narrowly tailored to serve a compelling governmental interest?
 
dangelder
2008-01-14 7:39:44 PM  
America is where wings take dream.
 
drjekel_mrhyde
2008-01-14 7:41:00 PM  
Where is Hotwingconspiracy
 
Stibbons
2008-01-14 7:41:02 PM  
And every morning I'll say: "Good morning Chicken!"
And at your wedding I'll sing: "Bawk Bawk Bawk Bawk, Bawk Bawk Bawk Baw??"
 
ScottMpls
2008-01-14 7:41:23 PM  
UN_SPACEY: Narrowly tailored to serve a compelling governmental interest?

Obviously in the interests of national security, and to protect the locals from terrists ...
 
Mike__Hunt
2008-01-14 7:41:31 PM  
Teets and arse breasts and thighs.... good eats!
 
ramp it up
2008-01-14 7:42:44 PM  
My town is the pinnacle of snobbery and doesn't allow signs advertising your business or restaurant (for instance, no "Golden Arches" to announce a McDonald's) so it's a blast for newcomers to try and find their way around. Every shopping plaza looks identical which makes it even more fun.
 
gund
2008-01-14 7:43:59 PM  
Shouldn't it be
"if it's not specifically permitted, it is specifically prohibited"?
 
penthesilea
2008-01-14 7:44:09 PM  
Get rid of the chicken and have a chick in a bikini out there. Give them something to cluck about.
 
vudukungfu [TotalFark]
2008-01-14 7:44:40 PM  
more complete (new window)Remember the little flag decals you get with the iscover card are illegal.
Someone in Advertizing should do a year in jail.
/really.
 
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