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(Some Guy)   Millions of college students die of hunger after microwave ovens found to be dangerous   ( divider line
    More: Unlikely  
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13192 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Mar 2007 at 9:57 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

151 Comments     (+0 »)

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2007-03-29 08:23:24 PM  
Cell phones probably do more harm to cells than microwave ovens.
2007-03-29 08:30:47 PM  
After being evacuated from my dorm at 3AM back in my college days because someone left popcorn burning in their microwave, I believe it.
2007-03-29 08:36:47 PM  
Wow, eight people were tested! That's got me convinced. Fie on you tv dinners! Fie I say!
2007-03-29 08:55:39 PM  
2007-03-29 09:44:22 PM  
While it was disturbing and could have killed me, I have to give a shout-out to Dr. Wineberg and his classic, "Jiffy Pop Testicles Surgical Replacement" gag.

One for the ages my friend, I LOLed so outloud I couldn't sue you for malpractice. By the way, the papers I served you? You guessed it ANTRHAX! Gotcha!
2007-03-29 09:44:42 PM  
I had to explain to my roommate's mother, who read this a few years ago, that microwaving blood is different than microwaving your food. When you inject blood into a person, you want it to be whole. If the blood cells have been lysed (i.e. broken up) by being microwaved, your body won't like that very much.

However, with food, it really doesn't matter much whether the components are broken up. In fact, your stomach is very acidic because it wants to break down what you eat into usable products.

I'm sure there are still some nutrients lost with microwaving, as is the case with all cooking. However, I'd imagine eating microwaved broccoli is better for you than munching on a bag of potato chips.
2007-03-29 10:00:24 PM  
queezyweezel: Cell phones probably do more harm to cells than microwave ovens.

Beer trumps all as far as dangerousness goes. Good thing college kids never drink.
2007-03-29 10:01:51 PM  
They've been saying this for years.

*ding!* Oooh, pizza's ready!
2007-03-29 10:01:51 PM  
Duh, its because microwaves are a form of lighter fluid
2007-03-29 10:02:23 PM  
That is the single stupidest thing I have ever read on fark.

Thanks Subby! Always looking for new record holders.
2007-03-29 10:03:29 PM  
I'm going to go stick a bunch of CD's and DVD's and forks and spoons and diecast cars in my microwave and see what happens.
2007-03-29 10:03:34 PM  
This article fails the breathless exclamation trustworthiness test.

I never believe articles that overuse exclamations! It looks like the article is written by a gullible idiot! Your house could be on fire RIGHT NOW!
2007-03-29 10:03:58 PM  
And exactly how does this harm Ramen noodles? or Easy Mac?
2007-03-29 10:04:27 PM  
I've always found it interesting that the vast majority
of people don't know how to use the power control.
Practically all microwaves will heat things in 10% increments from 10 up to 100.
Virtually everyone just blasts at 100% power whatever they have in it, even if they're just warming something up.

/and I'm talking about women, too
2007-03-29 10:04:46 PM  
And yet I've never had anything greenlighted....
2007-03-29 10:05:00 PM  
Bad Housekeeping >

You cook pizza in the microwave? That's one floppy pizza...
2007-03-29 10:06:51 PM  
They is the nasty cats, not microwaves...duh

[image from too old to be available]
2007-03-29 10:06:53 PM  
Miles D Davis Jr.: That is the single stupidest thing I have ever read on fark.

seconded. whoever wrote this must have slept through basic physics classes while getting their journalism degree.

/I slept through my english classes.
2007-03-29 10:07:22 PM  
Interesting... nurse warmed blood in a microwave oven. Microwave being in the OR because everyone likes a burrito during surgery.
2007-03-29 10:08:04 PM  

I've used a microwave for 21 year with no harm. Bypassing the door lock and using it with the door open, that's another story. No, I haven't tried that.

Anyone ever try the grape trick? You cut a grape in half and nuke it and it's supposed to shoot out plasma. Haven't tried that yet either.
2007-03-29 10:08:51 PM  

-Ha! The burrito's pointing at me! That means I get to eat it!

-Double or nothing for this hot dog?

[image from too old to be available]
2007-03-29 10:09:26 PM  
The violent change that microwaving causes to the food molecules forms new life forms called radiolytic compounds. These are mutations that are unknown in the natural world.

Never put this guy's hat or other foil objects into a microwave.
2007-03-29 10:10:00 PM  
I love the constant assumption that incr'd cholesterol levels in food -----> incr'd serum cholesterol levels.

\too many other holes in article to even think about
2007-03-29 10:11:04 PM  
I'd worry more about the crap I put into the microwave, rather than the microwaving itself.
2007-03-29 10:11:05 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

I found that article very interesting.

/PS: no foil in the microwave
2007-03-29 10:11:12 PM  
Oh sure, blame it on the cat!

[image from too old to be available]

2007-03-29 10:12:10 PM  
Food? Microwave oven? Intriguing . . .

/Guess that explains the power cord on the bread box
2007-03-29 10:13:01 PM  
I'm not a huge fan of microwaves, but I'll say this much.

I like chili a lot, and the chili I make (from scratch) cooked in a microwave tastes way better, and the meat has better texture, than when I tried the same recipe on top of the stove in a pot. It took a lot longer to cook, and basically tasted like boiled meat and was a pain in the ass because I had to stay at the stove for a significant amount of time. I also cook my frozen veggies in the microwave.

Scientifically, there is pretty much 0 leakage of MW out of an oven due to design, and what tiny bit there might be, rapidly diminishes to 0 due to some law about cubing with distance or something. From a nuitritional perspective I don't see any problem with heating food up by making water molecules vibrate. 'Mysterious compounds' that will kill you happens a lot more with things we take for granted.. like barbeques.. that charred carbon? It's carcinogenic. (Really.)

The reason people are afraid of microwaves is because they vibrate and make noise. It makes us think that deadly gamma radiation is shooting through us.

At least Rick Jones is safe.
2007-03-29 10:13:33 PM  
My brain hurts after reading that article... microwaving cooking? eating food microwaved food?

Certainly nothing with such bad editing could be believable.

Not to mention how, could someone in the medical field not think about the possibility of microwaves not farking up blood?
2007-03-29 10:13:52 PM  
FTA:There was a lawsuit in 1991 in Oklahoma. A woman named Norma Levitt had hip surgery, but was killed by a simple blood transfusion when a nurse "warmed the blood for the transfusion in a microwave oven!"

Doesn't radiation rip about DNA? What did they think would happen?
2007-03-29 10:14:25 PM  
Some of the above information on microwaved food was published in an Eight Volume Lawyers Cyclopedia which is used by lawyers who sue in medical cases. Who knows? One day there may be a class action lawsuit against microwaves.

Classic stuff!
2007-03-29 10:14:38 PM  
"Standing in front of a microwave is also highly damaging to your health. Perhaps you have already felt this intuitively? We know that cells explode in the microwave - just fry an egg in your microwave. We are made up of trillions of cells. So work out how many are getting damaged if you stand in front of your microwave for 5-10 minutes."


lawl? DOH! We are made up of sooo many cells, of course!!
2007-03-29 10:14:40 PM  
But is the coffee pot okay?
2007-03-29 10:15:40 PM  
Cue the "Not this shiat again" guy.

Bullshiat like this circulates perpetually. One week it's magnets that cure cancer, then it's microwaves making food poisonous, later it'll be something involving crystals. To quote the inimitable M.C. Hawking, "New age motherfarkers, don't get me started. / Made more sense than them last time I farted."
2007-03-29 10:15:47 PM  
Bad Housekeeping: Oh sure, blame it on the cat!

Not that cat, statistics don't apply to the individual...
2007-03-29 10:15:48 PM  
Woops (about = apart) in my previous comment.
2007-03-29 10:16:34 PM  
Microwaves disperse quickly, and those in a microwave oven aren't that powerful, so unless you are peering in the window with your nose against the glass for 20 minutes, you'll be fine.

Also, radiation affects living matter (e.g. blood transfusions) much differently than it does non-living matter (e.g. meat). Radiation hurts cells by breaking down the DNA, causing cell death or mutations when it replicates. Digestion will break down any cells you consume in the end anyway, which will already be dead, so it doesn't matter if they are torn up to begin with. Now, if you inject mutated, damaged blood cells into someone's bloodstream, then there will be some problems.
2007-03-29 10:16:43 PM  
increased cholestoral levels?!?? Seriously?! Could it have anything to do with that Hungry Man Fried Chik'n Dinner with over one pound of food? No, of course not. How about dem supreme pizza rolls? Nah...

/doesn't think microwaved broccoli will cause heart attackies
2007-03-29 10:17:26 PM  
sirgrim: Doesn't radiation rip about DNA? What did they think would happen?

Different kind of radiation. Electromagnetic Radiation is just radio waves. Your microwave operates at about 2.4Ghz, and the waves vibrate the water molecules in food. Gama & beta radiation (nuclear radiation) break down cells.
2007-03-29 10:18:19 PM  
Don't forget the article's disclaimer:

Disclaimer : This information is not medical advice. Because every person's situation is different, the author of this article will not be held responsible for any negative results which come from reading or acting upon the information in this article. Use at your own risk.

The author's assertions are based on the misconception that irradiated food is the same as microwaved food, when in fact it is not - ionizing radiation is entirely different than high-power radio waves.

(Note: Irradiation is not the same as microwaving, but they are similar in that both use unnatural frequencies to alter food).

Whatever. Whoever greenlighted this pap needs to check their sources before attempting to engage everyone in a debate about absolutely nothing.
2007-03-29 10:19:01 PM  

By Stephanie Relfe B.Sc. (Sydney)

Well isn't that cute. Bachelor's degree is the new high school. Come back when you get your Master's, sweetheart.
2007-03-29 10:19:33 PM​asp?cite ID=4387 Sorry no pops.

Norma Levitt did get microwaved blood. Died of a blood clot. I find this so hysterical... how could anyone working in a hospital be so stupid as to microwave blood in the nurse's lounge.

Dying here. Soooo funny.
2007-03-29 10:19:42 PM  

Thanks for clearing that up.
2007-03-29 10:20:10 PM  

FTA:There was a lawsuit in 1991 in Oklahoma. A woman named Norma Levitt had hip surgery, but was killed by a simple blood transfusion when a nurse "warmed the blood for the transfusion in a microwave oven!"

Doesn't radiation rip about DNA? What did they think would happen?

Microwave radio waves - microwave radiation - is nowhere near energetic enough to break DNA. I would think it most likely to affect the polarization of membranes of some sort, which could potentially affect many cell processes.

If you heat a bag of blood in a microwave, though, you are likely to overheat parts of it enough to kill blood cells.
2007-03-29 10:20:25 PM  
We have a microwave oven, and I have to admit that from time to time I have cooked and heated leftovers in it, but this article really opened my eyes. From now on, I'm not going to use it for anything buy drying cats.
2007-03-29 10:20:32 PM  
2007-03-29 10:17:26 PM queezyweezel [TotalFark]

So are you saying heating blood in a microwave oven should not be damaging to the person receiving said blood?

2007-03-29 10:21:15 PM  
//and drunk, I should definitely add that
2007-03-29 10:22:46 PM  
I am concerned about cell phones though, which operate at the microwave band also, as does wireless in PC's..

See, it's not the frequency I have an issue with.. it's how they are designed to work.

There is continuous wave radiation which we are bombarded with 24 hours a day from the sun and so forth.. but it's smooth and constant. Then there is new generation cell phones and wireless.. those operate using constantly pulsing signals, and are square wave rather than sine.

And well, I know completely how it's not ionizing radiation.. but I'd really really like to see some serious studies done on how square wave pulsed signals affect the neurological system in organisms.

Nobody talks about it, yet medical authorities say 'dont give cells to children'.. why not? We all know cell phones aren't ionizing radiation. Do you know something we don't?
2007-03-29 10:24:28 PM  
Get thee to It's completely debunked there

/surprised there aren't half a dozen hotlinks to the snopes entry
//too lazy to do it myself
///slashies kill ur foodz!!
2007-03-29 10:24:51 PM  
Dextro: So are you saying heating blood in a microwave oven should not be damaging to the person receiving said blood?

No. it'd be very detrimental. when you microwave a liquid, you heat it up very rapidly, and kill the cells. You boil it on a microscopic level.
I'm not sure what the exact effect on a living organism is when exposed to 1KW of 2.4Ghz energy, but it's not good. The FCC says you shouldn't stand in front of a 4W beam of wifi radiation.
It may kill cells, but it won't mutate them. Any RF engineers know exactly what happens to cells when they're exposed to high power RF radiation?
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