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(Reuters)   Since the killer hurricane season didn't pan out, global warming scientists are more careful with their doom forecasting. Just kidding: Now they're predicting all life on Earth will die soon   (today.reuters.com) divider line
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    More: Unlikely  
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1257 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 28 Nov 2006 at 10:13 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



36 Comments     (+0 »)
 
2wolves [TotalFark]
2006-11-28 8:37:36 PM  
On a geological scale they're correct.

It's "Global Climate Change" for the record.

Now go out and drink on Exxon's dollar troll boy.
 
BrownManUPS
2006-11-28 9:59:40 PM  
It is pretty hot outside for Early December coming up...

/Indiana
//Forcast calls for snow...fark
 
PirateKing [OhFark]
2006-11-28 10:08:18 PM  
Boy are you sarcastic folks going to look silly when we're all dead.
 
PC LOAD LETTER [TotalFark]
2006-11-28 10:17:25 PM  
Nah, not all life, just most of it :/
 
d000fus
2006-11-28 10:25:48 PM  
It's unusually warm in my apartment, therefore global warming is a FACT.
 
MWeather
2006-11-28 10:27:38 PM  
Natural or man-made, climate change likely will result in a Malthusian catastrophe. This is not news.
 
Kiler
2006-11-28 10:28:47 PM  
Subby forgot the EVERYBODY PANIC line.
 
MindStalker
2006-11-28 10:34:30 PM  
Kiler: Warning! Entire earth will look like Mexico City... EVERYBODY HISPANIC!
 
Kar98
2006-11-28 10:41:05 PM  
Lovelock adopted the name Gaia, the Greek mother earth goddess, in the 1960s to apply to his then revolutionary theory that the earth functions as a single, self-sustaining organism. His theory is now widely accepted.

Oh really now.

Nope, it's commonly discussed as the Gaia Hypothesis. Accepted, as theory? Not so much.
 
Electrify
2006-11-28 10:47:32 PM  
Sounds more like a crackpot looking to get some media attention than an actual scientist.

Why can't the media focus on competent people in these fields and leave the attention whores alone.
 
LesserEvil [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2006-11-28 10:50:32 PM  
Clearly, the lull in hurricanes is only a bigger sign of impending doom!

Ever notice how the sandwich-board "The End Is Near" guys disappeared when the climatologist "The End Is Near" guys came out of the woodwork?

Coincidence? I think not.

Must have been pretty easy to get student loans in the 60s and 70s.
 
Dave The Slushy
2006-11-28 11:02:19 PM  
Funny thing is, I've stopped caring. Thanks to George Carlin and Battlestar Galactica, I've decided:

1) The planet is fine
2) Humanity isn't worth saving

As a result, I feel no guilt in knowing that my gas-guzzling aging Japanese sports car is doing its bit to speed up the demise of this spoilt, self centred, masochistic excuse for a civilization.

/Losing all hope is freedom.
 
theeagle
2006-11-28 11:04:15 PM  
Holy jumpin' Jesus! Things are all farked up! Bad kitty!!
 
Hogwasher
2006-11-28 11:15:32 PM  
Once the Himalyan glaciers are gone, two billion people in China and India are going to run very short of water.

If the Greenland ice cap melts, another two billion people will be displaced by sea level rises, the cooling of Europe and the heating of the equatorial countries.

Even taking the undisputed science, it starts to look bad very quickly.
 
Kiler
2006-11-28 11:20:33 PM  
MindStalker Much better!

Hogwasher The logical solution would be to pipe that rising sea water to inland China and India. That will give them water and lower the sea levels at the same time. It's win win.
 
pummisher
2006-11-28 11:21:28 PM  
Waterworld is coming true.
 
talkertopc [TotalFark]
2006-11-28 11:31:48 PM  
Kar98
it's commonly discussed as the Gaia Hypothesis. Accepted, as theory? Not so much.
It's not? It seems self evident to me that most things on earth are connected and affects each other, we affect our environment and it affects us.

submitter
Now they're predicting all life on Earth will die soon
English is not my first language but I think I learned early on that "they" means more than one.
 
lerry
2006-11-28 11:31:49 PM  
Well...They're talking mid-century here... So I'll be about 75 years old...almost dead.... And my kids will be dead because I'm pro-choice, so this doesn't effect me...
 
skyrous
2006-11-28 11:57:03 PM  
So we have to move north?

Ok note for tomorrow... pick up shot gun case of beer and hound dog.

When it literally get hot as hell head north with said items drink case of beer on the way and when I become conscious again I'll be extremely hung over... and I should be conquerer of Canada as well. I can then invite the rest of America in and spend a a century or two at our new summer home.

ain't America GREAT!
 
Dave The Slushy
2006-11-29 12:00:27 AM  
lerry

Well...They're talking mid-century here... So I'll be about 75 years old...almost dead.... And my kids will be dead because I'm pro-choice, so this doesn't effect me...

Dude, by the time your 75, 80 will be the new 40! Realised the other day that there's every chance I could live to be 150. Hell, 60 isn't even old any more....

Basically, we'll be hitting out second mid-life crisis when the shiat hits the fan.
 
her.royal.majesty
2006-11-29 12:48:46 AM  
Dave The Slushy
/Losing all hope is freedom.

amen to that. except my crx won't start right now, so i'm saving the environment with crappy public transit and a bike.
 
bmasso
2006-11-29 2:12:48 AM  
MWeather : Natural or man-made, climate change likely will result in a Malthusian catastrophe. This is not news.

You mean "malthisian" - as in a false disaster prediction?

Wiki entry on R. Mathius : "He is best known for his pessimistic, false, but highly influential, views on population growth, which overlooked the potential for improvements in food-production technology, city water supplies, etc.
 
Dave The Slushy
2006-11-29 4:18:36 AM  
her.royal.majesty

amen to that. except my crx won't start right now, so i'm saving the environment with crappy public transit and a bike.

BOOOOO!!

/Bonus points for the bike and the lamp-post tin-foil wrap though.
 
her.royal.majesty
2006-11-29 4:28:20 AM  
Dave The Slushy
/Bonus points for the bike and the lamp-post tin-foil wrap though.

oh i KNOW you're not talking shiat about my car!
 
MWeather
2006-11-29 8:22:20 AM  
bmasso:You mean "malthisian" - as in a false disaster prediction?

Wiki entry on R. Mathius : "He is best known for his pessimistic, false, but highly influential, views on population growth, which overlooked the potential for improvements in food-production technology, city water supplies, etc.

No, I mean Malthusian, as in Thomas Malthus. Where the hell did R. Mathius come from? How can you copy something from Wikipedia, but get the guy's name wrong?

Malthus was only wrong because there was a revolution in farming techniques. Now that population has grown, those improvements are moot.
 
1. Put snakes on plane
2006-11-29 9:03:43 AM  
MWeather: Malthus was only wrong because there was a revolution in farming techniques.

Malthus was wrong for several reasons. The underlying reason was that he did not understand technology and how it advances. Farming is still advancing, and at a much more rapid pace than it was in Malthus's time.

Citing Malthus seriously makes anyone's claims look foolish.
 
VRaptor117
2006-11-29 9:27:24 AM  
We didn't listen!?! We...We didn't listen!!!
 
mtuTopHat
2006-11-29 9:53:39 AM  
FTFA:
"The earth has a fever..."

Well, I think we all know the cure...
 
MWeather
2006-11-29 11:11:49 AM  
1. Put snakes on plane: Farming is still advancing, and at a much more rapid pace than it was in Malthus's time.

Population is increasing faster than food supply, so that doesn't really matter. And it has nothing to do with the context in which I used the term: climate change.

Citing Malthus seriously makes anyone's claims look foolish.

I didn't cite Malthus, I referred to a Malthusian catastrophe. There is a difference between saying Malthus was right, and referring to population exceeding food supply.

Are you saying population outstripping food supply isn't a Malthusian catastrophe?
 
boogereater
2006-11-29 12:25:45 PM  
1. Put snakes on plane

Citing Malthus seriously makes anyone's claims look foolish.

Charles Darwin cited Malthus.
 
llieswald
2006-11-29 1:00:56 PM  
FTFA: The earth has a fever

Needs more cowbell.

[image from content.answers.com too old to be available]
 
unto_others
2006-11-29 1:07:37 PM  
BrownManUPS: It is pretty hot outside for Early December coming up...

/Indiana
//Forcast calls for snow...fark
I'm also in Indiana, and it seems like winter ain't what it used to be. Looks to be precipitating slush right now, but yesterday was 60 degrees! Aside from the evil winter of '02-'03 I haven't worn a winter coat in ages.
 
carmody
2006-11-29 1:10:42 PM  
Yesterday in Wichita it was 65 degrees. When I woke up today it was about 35, and has now dropped to 25, with thunderstorms dropping sleet, freezing rain and hail all over town. Tomorrow's high is supposed to be in the mid-20s.

It's stupid to assume that "global warming" means every temperature everywhere will slowly go up. Weather patterns will be disrupted in a myriad of ways...if the proponents of climate change theory are correct.

In the end, it'll be interesting to see who gets to say, "I told you so."
 
bmasso
2006-11-29 1:40:30 PM  
MWeather : No, I mean Malthusian, as in Thomas Malthus. Where the hell did R. Mathius come from? How can you copy something from Wikipedia, but get the guy's name wrong?

Perhaps because he prefered to go by "Robert", instead of "Thomas Robert", etc.?
Wiki : ..."he preferred to be known as "Robert Malthus"...
Any mistake in spelling his last name was an actual typo, though.

Malthus was only wrong because there was a revolution in farming techniques.

The pertainent part is that he WAS wrong.
So any labeling of GW/GCC as a "Malthusian Disaster" has a certain ironic overtone to it you may not have intended.

Now that population has grown, those improvements are moot.

Yes, if you assume that NO FURTHUR IMPROVEMENTS will ensue.
Which appears to be (T.) R. Malthus's major mistake in the first place,
assuming that a variable was a constant.

Last bit from Wiki : Malthus's arithmetic model of food supply is almost universally rejected as it can be clearly demonstrated that food supply has kept pace with population for the past two centuries...

A "Malthusian Disaster" is certianly possible in theory, but theory only takes you so far before you have to surrender to WHAT ACTUALLY OCCURS.
 
hockeyfarker
2006-11-29 2:31:21 PM  
You know, they can't predict the weather for five days from now. Excuse me if I have doubts about predictions 50 years away.

It was -23 Celsius when I got up this morning. The ski hills are getting record snowfall for this time of year. What global warming?
 
MadSkillz
2006-11-29 8:49:43 PM  
Scientists love saying stuff like this for more grant money.

Remember it's all about the grant money.
 
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