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(NY Sun)   Actual headline: "Scientist: By year 3000, we'll be giants with brown skin living to age of 120." Aaaaallll righty, then   (nysun.com) divider line
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    More: Weird  
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1268 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 17 Oct 2006 at 5:07 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



53 Comments     (+0 »)


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extraugly
2006-10-17 4:32:57 PM  
I'm all for the pert breasts. Viva la evolution!
 
Slim Pickens
2006-10-17 4:38:51 PM  
I'm pretty sure that by the year 3000, I'm going to be bacterial waste.
 
mryoop789
2006-10-17 4:39:04 PM  
He's assuming humans will survive that long as a species.

/is doubtful
 
jay_vee
2006-10-17 4:39:47 PM  
The rocket cars are going to have to be big then.
 
mryoop789
2006-10-17 4:43:53 PM  
[image from duchovny.net too old to be available]
 
rose8199 [OhFark]
2006-10-17 4:49:14 PM  
that sounds reasonable to me
 
skinnycatullus [recently expired TotalFark]
2006-10-17 4:55:08 PM  
...mankind splits into a frail, wealthy genetic upper class and a downtrodden, ape-like worker class

I think we have a good start on that already.
 
tarrant84
2006-10-17 5:00:29 PM  
Except the fact that short, fat, bald rich guys are marrying hot women... this guy isn't taking into account the fact that having money often trumps having great genes.

"Men will exhibit symmetrical facial features, look athletic, and have squarer jaws, deeper voices. Women on the other hand will develop lighter skin, large clear eyes, pert breasts, glossy hair and even features."

Have you seen what the average person looks like nowadays?

[image from news.bbc.co.uk too old to be available]

Also, by and large, cultures aren't really mixing.
 
muninsfire
2006-10-17 5:05:46 PM  
skinnycatullus: ...mankind splits into a frail, wealthy genetic upper class and a downtrodden, ape-like worker class

I think we have a good start on that already.

Yep. You'll be in the worker class, given you don't recognize the literary reference.
 
bikerdiva
2006-10-17 5:08:00 PM  
*gives thumbs-up to her black Puerto Rican dad and white mom*
 
whidbey
2006-10-17 5:12:16 PM  
tarrant84: Also, by and large, cultures aren't really mixing.

Maybe not in Whitebread North America...
 
Q-Redux
2006-10-17 5:16:30 PM  
Who might be giants by the year 3000?

Oh, They Might Be Giants.

/so very sorry
 
doublebonus
2006-10-17 5:16:34 PM  
Ever been to L.A? Da cultures be mixin'!
 
cpux
2006-10-17 5:17:14 PM  
[image from reason.com too old to be available]
 
Phoenix65420
2006-10-17 5:18:39 PM  
from TFA "Dr. Curry predicts that 100,000 years from now, mankind will be divided into two distinct subspecies, with a genetic elite moving in ever more exclusive circles.The genetic upper class will, he argues, be increasingly tall, thin, symmetrical, clean, healthy, and creative, while the genetic underclass will be short, stocky, asymmetrical, grubby, unhealthy, and less intelligent"

So....

Tfarkers

and

Fark liters?
 
soupnyc807
2006-10-17 5:19:04 PM  
The future of humanity?

[image from muppet.wikia.com too old to be available]
 
DrZiffle
2006-10-17 5:23:03 PM  
We'll Be Giants With Brown Skin

Barry Bonds?
 
BizarroHulk
2006-10-17 5:23:37 PM  
I saw a tall brown-skinned woman with pert breasts today. Could she be a time traveller from the year 102000?

Or maybe just a Brazillian model?

Or did I just give some screenwriter the treatment for a direct to DVD movie starring Sofia Vergara: "The Model from the End of Time"


/I'm not remotely funny today, am I?
 
Wizzin
2006-10-17 5:26:06 PM  
Unless it is happening in the next 60 years or so, I couldn't care less.
 
boogerwolf
2006-10-17 5:38:05 PM  
I tend to think at the rate Chinese are breeding it will be the opposite. Everyone will have Asian features, be small and have short weeners. Well, except the womenfolk. They won't have weeners. And Yao Ming's desendants.

I didn't put too much thought into this. Can't you tell.
 
Walker [TotalFark]
2006-10-17 5:38:39 PM  
Who gives a f*ck? We'll all be dead.
 
lordargent
2006-10-17 5:39:39 PM  
[image from photos.signonsandiego.com too old to be available]

I knew it.
 
TastyElectricSoap
2006-10-17 5:40:29 PM  
This is one of the stupidest piles of bunk ive heard all week.
 
StinkyFiddlewinks
2006-10-17 5:40:39 PM  
We'll need to be giants in order to keep our heads above the water.

That's it. I hereby proclaim myself: StinkyFiddlewinks, Scientist.

Expect my Romeroesque reports in a few weeks.

Phase one: Humans to evolve webbed fingers and toes by 3000.
 
Ecobuckeye
2006-10-17 5:48:04 PM  
And, 35 years after that, we ain't gonna need to tell the truth, won't tell no lies. Everything you think, do and say, will be in the pill you take that day.
 
Ecobuckeye
2006-10-17 5:48:48 PM  
Damn, I blew it by 500 years. Crap.
 
Weidbrewer [OhFark]
2006-10-17 5:56:02 PM  
Didn't we already speand half the day debating this in another thread?


http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=2355101

Oh yeah, that's right. We did
 
Twitch OSX
2006-10-17 6:15:02 PM  
So.. were all gonna be giant mexicans? Wheres the spiffy tag?
 
EJ25T
2006-10-17 6:26:08 PM  
Are we sure this guy is a scientist?

A scientician, perhaps...
 
Dave L
2006-10-17 6:41:44 PM  
This article is, as has been pointed out, total bunkum, and reflects the scientists prejudices more than any possible real future.

In fact, its really probably worse than good science fiction, which is usually based on sound science.

Evolution takes multiple paths simultaneously, not one or two, and variation is the rule rather than the exception. I would think variation will probably increase rather than decrease, as new factors, probably social rather than geographical, start to take the most prominent role.

Plus, he's missed the likelihood that by 3000 B.C. we will have managed to populate large parts of the space outside the planet, and as evolution shows, isolated communities develop increased differences.
 
nevesis
2006-10-17 6:44:22 PM  
Technology increases human life span. (see: any doctor on earth)

Technology development will increase exponentially. (see: moore's law)

Thus - human life span will increase exponentially.

Fark year 3000, people born in the 1980s will average 120 year life spans.


/nanotechnology, stem cells, et al are just beginning
 
Dufus
2006-10-17 6:51:47 PM  
Weidbrewer

Didn't we already speand half the day debating this in another thread?

Like you had something better to do?
 
Bahamut
2006-10-17 6:56:47 PM  
I have no problem with my ancestors all looking like Rosario Dawson.
 
exno
2006-10-17 7:10:20 PM  
THEY TOOK OUR JOBS!!
 
Major Thomb
2006-10-17 7:16:24 PM  
Behold the power of scientifically invalid extrapolation.
 
JohnnyStreets
2006-10-17 7:38:56 PM  
"Women will have lighter skin, large, clear eyes, pert breasts, glossy hair, more symmetrical features, and smooth, hairless skin." WOO!!
 
peachykeen
2006-10-17 7:47:38 PM  
If you want to know what the humans of the future will look like, don't look at who you think is attractive, look at who is actually having the babies. Personally I'm for government regulated reproduction.

Notice this is by a school of economics, not science.
 
Tobin_Lam
2006-10-17 7:59:30 PM  
Weidbrewer

Didn't we already speand half the day debating this in another thread?

Apparently subby just founded the lower class by missing the huge discussion on the front page. Greenlighter is his right hand man.

/Greenlighters: You guys are better than this.
 
braingame
2006-10-17 8:02:45 PM  
PERTY-BREASTED AMAZON SECHS!!!!

WHOOOO HOOOO!
 
Bacontastesgood
2006-10-17 8:31:36 PM  
boogerwolf I tend to think at the rate Chinese are breeding....

The Chinese population is on the decline. Try Indian.

I didn't put too much thought into this. Can't you tell.

You are a fine example of the mentally deficient sub-species of human known as the "totalfarker".
 
MortuusLupus
2006-10-17 9:23:36 PM  
We better damn well not lose the SDF-1. I'm not going to leave behind a legacy of huge, dark-skinned descendants if they're going to just let that ship escape and get taken by a bunch of tiny folk.
 
Tarkus
2006-10-17 10:00:17 PM  
Only 120? Bring on the antiagathic drugs!
 
Tachikoma
2006-10-17 10:19:51 PM  
"Women will have lighter skin, large, clear eyes, pert breasts, glossy hair, more symmetrical features, and smooth, hairless skin."

They'll all be anime characters?
 
pshaw
2006-10-17 10:22:42 PM  
Q-Redux: Who might be giants by the year 3000?

Oh, They Might Be Giants.

/so very sorry

*rimshot*
 
tyr9
2006-10-17 10:23:42 PM  
Bahamut, that will be your "desendents" looking like Rosario Dawson.
/I'm an arse
//And I wouldn't mind my desendents looking like that either
 
darthaegis [OhFark]
2006-10-18 8:55:31 AM  
Where's your Science God now?

/always wanted to say that.
 
Makh
2006-10-18 10:05:05 AM  
The genetic upper class will, he argues, be increasingly tall, thin, symmetrical, clean, healthy, and creative, while the genetic underclass will be short, stocky, asymmetrical, grubby, unhealthy, and less intelligent.

I think the opposite. Think of the way many nerds and geeks look. And in the book, even the morlock were more intelligent.
 
Weidbrewer [OhFark]
2006-10-18 10:44:24 AM  
Dufus
Like you had something better to do?


Obviously I did not.
 
Smeggy Smurf
2006-10-18 1:04:05 PM  
In 102000, technology uses you!
 
God-is-a-Taco
2006-10-18 4:11:28 PM  
I don't see humanity being one color in only 994 years from now. There will still be some Caucasians and Asians I imagine.

Ecobuckeye

And, 35 years after that, we ain't gonna need to tell the truth, won't tell no lies. Everything you think, do and say, will be in the pill you take that day.

If man is still alive.. if woman can survive, they may find...

I came here to reference that song, good work.
 
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