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(   Student's science experiment is imprinting herself as duck's mother. Little quacker now wears a diaper and follows her to class. Your dog wants foie gras   ( divider line
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11258 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 May 2006 at 2:09 PM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

75 Comments     (+0 »)

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2006-05-30 12:18:34 PM  
Why do ducks have large webbed feet?

... to stamp out burning forest fires.

Why do elephants have large flat feet?

... to stamp out burning ducks.
2006-05-30 12:22:13 PM  
Foie gras comes from geese, not ducks, you heathen.
2006-05-30 01:32:44 PM  
2wolves: Foie gras comes from geese, not ducks, you heathen.

"Foie gras [fwɑ gʁɑ] (French for "fat liver") is the fattened liver of a duck or goose that has been overfed."

/don't know, I'm a steak, pork, shrimp man myself.
2006-05-30 01:35:16 PM  
Whoa. I'm the heathen. There goes another finger joint.
2006-05-30 02:12:51 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
2006-05-30 02:13:03 PM  
But what does the sheep want for lunch?
2006-05-30 02:13:57 PM  
Duck Job NSFW!

2006-05-30 02:14:06 PM  
Not to go all PETA or anything, but doesn't this seem a little mean?

"Hey, hey duck! I'm your mother! Eh, just kidding."
2006-05-30 02:14:36 PM  
Sick PETA on the little biatch for duck-abuse! Five Alarm DUCK-ABUSE!!!


You can do your science fair project on something like that these days? I mean, sure I did one on goldfish, but I was in fifth grade. And I didn't dress them up either.
2006-05-30 02:14:56 PM  
sure its cute now, just wait until it grows up to be a 6 foot freak of nature, then we will see how cute it is...
2006-05-30 02:15:17 PM  
Aw man, buzz_kirkwood beat me to it. Phooey.
2006-05-30 02:15:21 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-05-30 02:15:38 PM  
Well, buzz, the article says she's keeping it, so, uh, no, not really mean.
Most pets seem to think of their owners as parents.
2006-05-30 02:16:19 PM  
This so-called science sounds like quackery.
2006-05-30 02:17:54 PM  
Oh my god, that is awful.

Living at home while in college?
2006-05-30 02:18:01 PM  
My brother brought home a duckling soon after it hatched (he stole it from it's mother) and it followed him all over the place. My mom made him take it back, though. It really did think he was it's mother. Quack.
2006-05-30 02:18:24 PM  
Great. Now she has ruined the ducklings chance of being able to survive in the wild. Good going jerk!
2006-05-30 02:19:22 PM  
...why does Godzilla have big feet?

To stamp out the burning elephants.
2006-05-30 02:19:45 PM  
foie gras? I thought it was Faux Grass.

/I was wondering why the French would eat astroturf.
2006-05-30 02:19:58 PM  
Don't make me bring out Bob the Angry Flower.
2006-05-30 02:21:32 PM  
Duck butter.
2006-05-30 02:22:30 PM  
Its awesomto fart in an elevator full of old people, cause they can't smell it anyway
2006-05-30 02:23:39 PM  
Science: All It's Quacked Up to Be (Copyright 2006 by the Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

You wouldn't want someone else walking away with your Pulitzer...
2006-05-30 02:24:11 PM  
this gal sounds like she quaked up, a real bird-brain.

/don't like the puns? bill me!
2006-05-30 02:24:28 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-05-30 02:24:51 PM  

sure its cute now, just wait until it grows up to be a 6 foot freak of nature, then we will see how cute it is...

[image from too old to be available]

Kill... me!
2006-05-30 02:25:09 PM  

Most pets seem to think of their owners as parents.

Awww jeeez.NOW you tell me.
How am I going to afford college tuition?

Is he gonna live in my basement for the rest of his life?

Maybe he could get a football scholarship, he's just the right size.
He'd make a GREAT football.
2006-05-30 02:25:40 PM  
I think the duck just wants some Sunchips.

/RIP Mitch
2006-05-30 02:26:07 PM  
Is this really news?

Fleaking Rame!
2006-05-30 02:26:36 PM  
At parties I find the discussion of Howard The Duck often ends in knock down, drag-out brawls.
2006-05-30 02:27:07 PM  
Megan's going to have a great sex life when she's out on her own.

Her dad probably encouraged the project for precisely that reason.
2006-05-30 02:27:38 PM  
Megan had a little duck
His plumage was white as snow
Everywhere that Megan went
the duck was sure to go
He followed her to school one day
It was against the rules
If he hollers, let him go
Eeny meeny miny moe!

/apologies to George "Spanky" McFarland
2006-05-30 02:29:38 PM  
RadioactiveApe; I was totally lookin for that picture, well played good sir!
2006-05-30 02:29:41 PM  
Its awesomto fart in an elevator full of old people, cause they can't smell it anyway

Thanks for the tip?

uberlemming, I was about to chastise you for misspelling part of your first pun, thereby rendering it without 'pun'ch, but you more than made up for it with the slashy pun. Well played.
2006-05-30 02:29:43 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
Not available for comment.
2006-05-30 02:30:11 PM  
She's a Witch!
2006-05-30 02:31:44 PM  
i had some ducks when i was kid, basically with the hopes to grow up for a diversified diet for my snake. one really liked me and followed be around when ever i was out side. i named him peep peep. when i would go outside i would say peep peep and he would come running out of whereever he/she was and come follow me. if i would start running he/she would run and flap his/her wings after me. i used to feed it cheerios and corn and vegtables and let it forrage in the backyard for food. i really liked that duck. they do sh*t everywhere tho. they are not inside pets. my dad decided it made to much noise and one say it was gone =( i cried.
2006-05-30 02:32:12 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

Mmmmm. Duck.
2006-05-30 02:34:34 PM  
Did anyone do it yet?
Her myspace page?
2006-05-30 02:35:47 PM  
She's looking for a duck friendly apartment? That's great! My place allows ducks and it even has a little room in the kitchen where the ducky can sleep. Oh, also, it won't get cold, this little comartment has an excellent heater in it. Yes it gets quite warm in there...
2006-05-30 02:37:09 PM  
From TFA:

Megan plans to live at home for her first year or two of college. After that, Megan says she'll have to find an apartment that's duck-friendly.

So, what, the duck is going to be living in it's Mother's basement forever? Don't ducks usually leave the nest after a while and go out on their own?

/faulted experiment
2006-05-30 02:37:50 PM  
That's nothing...

My mother was a duck.
2006-05-30 02:38:26 PM  
Did anyone do it yet?
Her myspace page?

Damn thats one fugly biatch, makes me wonder what the poor duck looks like. Also I noticed a lack of duck in the pictures, I thought she loved this duck... I think she is abusing the duck.
2006-05-30 02:39:38 PM  
damn I have been fartin up a storm here at work, it is a good thing this place is smoke free!
2006-05-30 02:40:53 PM  
ekidwell wins the thread.

\Ducks eat for free at Subway.
2006-05-30 02:41:20 PM  
I hope she's thought about how long ducks live - These things live longer than cats. In a protected setting, ducks can live 25 years or more - I know this from personal experience - my uncle took in a duck that was hanging out on his patio one year, and the damn thing outlived him.

Since it was 16 years old (at least), we thought we'd have to put it down, since it couldn't live on its own in the wild. My aunt took it into the vet, but didn't want to go they said they'd take care of it.

Fast forward six months later - we found out that they didn't euthanize it - it is STILL alive 4 years later, at a wildlife rehab place. It hangs out in the pond during the warm weather, and still eats corn out of your hand.

To make a long story short - this girl may have another thought coming when she's pushing 40 and that damn duck is still hanging around.....
2006-05-30 02:41:52 PM  
Of course she's abusing the duck. For sarters she kidnapped the thing from its family and tricked it into thinking she was its mom. thats the M.O. of a lot of abduction cases.
2006-05-30 02:43:38 PM  
Foie gras is farking nasty! My husbands' parents always make it for the holidays.

Anyone who thinks it tastes good needs to reevaluate their taste buds. Just because it's expensive and rare, does not make it good.

People are so farking stupid.
2006-05-30 02:45:37 PM  

Your aunt needs to be shot when she nears old age, see how she feels about that!

You know, instead of putting her in a home and all.
2006-05-30 02:46:19 PM  
It's not like it's hard to get a duck to imprint on you. I watched a friend's duck when she was out of town and it imprinted on me, no problem--this after having imprinted earlier on my friend. Fickle children, those ducklings.

The duck was dumb as rocks. If you walked around the corner and the duck couldn't see you, she would stop in her tracks and start honking. Couldn't figure out that you were three bloomin' feet away.

Eventually the thing got big--lost its cute duckling qualities--and my friend took it back to the farm from whence it came. There's really no reason to have a duck as a "pet." They are large, loud, smelly, and they poop anywhere and everywhere.
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