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(Hammurabi)   Hammurabi's Code of Laws   ( divider line
    More: Interesting  
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6505 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jun 2002 at 3:14 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

73 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-06-07 03:19:15 PM  
If man switches TV at local pub from Football to ballet - he automatically dies, by the hand of god.
2002-06-07 03:21:07 PM  
Wrong thread Panama.
2002-06-07 03:21:07 PM  
Law 1: All attractive Farkettes must get their wardrobe exclusively from Frederick's of Hollywood.
2002-06-07 03:21:39 PM  
If any one write a code of laws too hard to understand, and others read it and cannot understand, he has transduced, and shall be labeled a bureaucrat and given a pension.
2002-06-07 03:21:47 PM  
they must have had a lot of electric chairs back then.
2002-06-07 03:21:51 PM  
in other news, how the fark did this get posted?
2002-06-07 03:22:00 PM  
Especially TheBitingFaery.
2002-06-07 03:22:02 PM  
"110. If a "sister of a god" open a tavern, or enter a tavern to drink, then shall this woman be burned to death."

Umm, yeah.
2002-06-07 03:22:06 PM  
2002-06-07 03:22:21 PM  
Next up on Fark: The Magic of the Magna Carta.
2002-06-07 03:23:07 PM  
Hammurabi is gay.
2002-06-07 03:23:11 PM  
Hammurabi has too many laws.

He should have but two laws:

1. Man is free to stare at boobies all day long.
2. Woman must not say a word to her boobie staring man.
2002-06-07 03:23:38 PM  
this goes there. ---^
[image from too old to be available]
2002-06-07 03:24:10 PM  
Too texty. Can someone post the Cliff Notes version?
2002-06-07 03:24:22 PM  
TheBitingFaery, HeatherAngelique, and Saturngirl must post nude several shots of themselves on a server of plentiful bandwidth, and must verily post the link thereof, that other farkers might view them, and slaughter kittens.
2002-06-07 03:25:19 PM  
Now there's a smooth read.

Rejected "Samurai Jack" episode?
2002-06-07 03:25:25 PM  
If a man trolls...blah blah..flamed by all...blahh...mods...

nah, forget it, I got nothin'
2002-06-07 03:25:56 PM  
Do you think anyone will actually READ this one? On a Friday afternoon? ;)
2002-06-07 03:26:23 PM  
For cryin out loud, that's just too many fuggin laws. Chill out Haummurabi, lifes too short.
2002-06-07 03:26:56 PM  
pacman - no I checked it. Right thread. It is the unwritten law of Hammurabi. See, it was supposed to carry over from the last link on the website. If you...........Awww fark it. Nevermind...
2002-06-07 03:27:16 PM  
2002-06-07 03:27:58 PM  
Code of Laws: I always went for this one as a prerequisite for Philosophy and the Great Library. Anyone remember the game I'm alluding too? Hint: Sid Meier
2002-06-07 03:28:06 PM  
Man, so many offenses punishable by death... are we sure that this isn't the Texas penal code? :-)
2002-06-07 03:28:22 PM  
What are words for? When no one listens anymore?
2002-06-07 03:29:19 PM  
148. If a man take a wife, and she be seized by disease, if he then desire to take a second wife he shall not put away his wife, who has been attacked by disease, but he shall keep her in the house which he has built and support her so long as she lives.

Yeah, I'm talking to you, Newt Gingrich!
2002-06-07 03:29:31 PM  
Sperrylite I never found a use for the Hanging Gardens.
2002-06-07 03:29:32 PM  
Combine this link with the NASCAR and the Horse racing link. You have before you THE HAT TRICK OF SUCK.
2002-06-07 03:31:16 PM  
I got you Panama.. my bad...

Bass555 were you in an MP3 channel on IRC today? If not someone has your name.
2002-06-07 03:31:16 PM  
19,092.1)If any man post in threads before reading article, you are probably posting at and shall be punished by posts that mock your short attention span, small weener, and the fact that you sleep with your sister/brother/mother.
2002-06-07 03:31:25 PM  
An eye for an eye my arse, more like death for an eye
2002-06-07 03:33:58 PM  
277. If any one hire a ship of sixty gur, he shall pay one-sixth of a shekel in money as its hire per day.
Damn those minimum wage laws!
2002-06-07 03:34:14 PM  
I enjoy ham.
2002-06-07 03:35:13 PM  
2. If any one bring an accusation against a man, and the accused go to the river and leap into the river, if he sink in the river his accuser shall take possession of his house. But if the river prove that the accused is not guilty, and he escape unhurt, then he who had brought the accusation shall be put to death, while he who leaped into the river shall take possession of the house that had belonged to his accuser.


2002-06-07 03:36:05 PM  
I can see afew people back then wondering whether their neighbors could swim. Especially the ones with the nice houses pretty wives.
I suspect most of the non-swimmers were kind of bred out of the equation back then.....
2002-06-07 03:36:49 PM  
"If any one bring an accusation against a man, and the accused go to the river and leap into the river, if he sink in the river his accuser shall take possession of his house."

So be sure not to commit your crimes during monsoon season.
2002-06-07 03:36:49 PM  
Spaking as a former classics major with his share of Mesopotamian history behind him, who now does world history textbooks for a living: Hammurubai was one bad motha!
2002-06-07 03:38:39 PM  
This is kinda like adding "in bed" to the end of fortunes in fortune cookies, except these are laws, and you add "Shall be put to death." Hmm..well, somewhat similar.
2002-06-07 03:39:00 PM  
I can see afew people back then wondering whether their neighbors could swim.

... And so was born the Trial Lawyer. Lowest form of animal known to mankind. Lower than the ape. Lower than the eel. Lower than the half-toed sloth in the maw of a tiger.
2002-06-07 03:39:00 PM  
220. If he had opened a tumor with the operating knife, and put out his eye, he shall pay half his value.

I wonder if the same goes for Spitballs
2002-06-07 03:41:22 PM  
And thus were lawyers born.

It's interesting to see how many laws they had that were punishable by death (modified by social class, of course)... lots of rules about slavery... rules for when you could divorce and remarry and when you couldn't... a culture so son-oriented that if your wife was barren she might give you one of her personal slaves to impregnate instead... and the famous "eye for an eye" laws, which sound barbaric today, but which were mostly intended to limit how much you could be punished for fighting. Oh, and tons of laws that set in stone (literally) the amount of money you could charge for certain services.
2002-06-07 03:41:28 PM  
PacMan: No, I was not! Somebody has my name? (*looks around*) - I wouldn't be suprised, it doesn't seem as though it would be uncommon.
2002-06-07 03:43:43 PM  
He who gets The Great Library first, wins, especially in II.

The Hanging Gardens will just make you lazy in building your temples and coliseums. Tis useless other than for the points.

Was it me or did Sid purposely make Communism the best government ever because he was secretly a pinko bastard himself?
2002-06-07 03:46:27 PM  
one gur for every five ka of corn

blimey! a gur for 5 ka! yeou must be jeoking!
2002-06-07 03:47:42 PM  
Oh, and the hideously long invocation at the end, where he asks every frickin' deity to take it out on any future kings who don't follow his rules to the letter.

May Nin-karak, the daughter of Anu, who adjudges grace to me, cause to come upon his members in E-kur high fever, severe wounds, that can not be healed, whose nature the physician does not understand, which he can not treat with dressing, which, like the bite of death, can not be removed, until they have sapped away his life.

What a thing to wish on some guy's "members", eh?
2002-06-07 03:49:42 PM  
"Was it me or did Sid purposely make Communism the best government ever because he was secretly a pinko bastard himself?"

You're missing the point. As the game player, the most effective form of gov't is where your units/people do pretty much what you say.

Besides, isn't there a wonder that you can get that keeps your democracy from preventing attacks on your neighbors?
2002-06-07 03:51:40 PM  
oh arent you just the man
2002-06-07 03:52:59 PM  
and I bet that crime as at an all time low...
2002-06-07 03:55:38 PM  
49, 50 and 51 refer to growing corn. Wasn't corn unknown until the native americans began cultivating it? Didn't they develop it as a hybrid grain?

OK, so I am a geek, but it probably means some other crop. Like wheat or heroin or something.
2002-06-07 04:05:07 PM  
"Like wheat or heroin or something."

"More bread, dear?"
"No, thanks. I'm still coming down from the muffins you served for breakfast."
"Well, don't come crying to me when you get the shakes in an hour."
2002-06-07 04:07:41 PM  
Tricky Chicken, yea I've been reading Guns, Germs, and Steel and thought that too. My guess would be a translation "error", 'cause I don't know how much English ole' Hammi spoke.

And there's a good reason for all the death prisons.

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