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(Reuters)   Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and two small kids are holing up in an African camp where wild lions will keep the media away while Angelina has her baby. What could possibly go wrong?   (today.reuters.com) divider line
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    More: Dumbass  
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15902 clicks; posted to Main » and Entertainment » on 10 Apr 2006 at 6:49 PM (17 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



61 Comments     (+0 »)


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the_gospel_of_thomas
2006-04-10 3:48:06 PM  
submitter: "Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and two small kids are holing up in an African camp where wild lions will keep the media away while Angelina has her baby. What could possibly go wrong?"


All of this security, isolation and man-eating wild animals won't prevent some pervert artist from making a sculpture of Angelina giving birth on a bearskin rug ... after the fact.

/for starters.
 
The Rev. Numbers
2006-04-10 3:48:20 PM  
No doubt they'll be importing the doctor, though.
 
envail
2006-04-10 3:55:02 PM  
I wonder if they're naming the baby Daniel.
 
the_gospel_of_thomas
2006-04-10 3:57:12 PM  
[image from images5.theimagehosting.com too old to be available]

Artists' conception of the baby and the delivery doctor sculpture.
 
muninsfire
2006-04-10 4:05:07 PM  
Betcha that someone makes a reality TV series out of it.

/Wonder who's going to sell their soul?
 
Mugato [TotalFark]
2006-04-10 5:12:00 PM  
It'll be funny when somehow the kid comes out looking like that wierd Asian lesbian lover of hers.
 
theghostinthemachine
2006-04-10 5:12:34 PM  
Maybe a dingo ate 'cher baby.
 
KinetiKiteniK
2006-04-10 6:52:27 PM  
"gives birth in tribute?"

roflmao what is this world coming to LOL
 
unfarkingbelievable
2006-04-10 6:52:40 PM  
Who really gives a fark? People have babies every minute; that doesn't make them special at all.
 
Alphax
2006-04-10 6:53:33 PM  
Well, on the good side, perhaps some paparazzi will get eaten. Or a Fox News reporter... nah, they never go in the field.
 
SlothB77
2006-04-10 6:54:00 PM  
Weirder celebrity couple Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes or Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt?
 
Axis of Weasel
2006-04-10 6:54:19 PM  
arent there tigers in africa?

[image from img118.imageshack.us too old to be available]
 
JoeCowboy
2006-04-10 6:54:30 PM  
Them's not babies, them's bait.

JC
 
shiatweasel
2006-04-10 6:54:34 PM  
the_gospel_of_thomas: All of this security, isolation and man-eating wild animals won't prevent some pervert artist from making a sculpture of Angelina giving birth on a bearskin rug ... after the fact.

I'd fap to it.
 
ACCORDianate
2006-04-10 6:54:42 PM  
unfarkingbelievable
Who really gives a fark? People have babies every minute; that doesn't make them special at all.

x2 with that
 
rka
2006-04-10 6:55:02 PM  
So she has her baby like people have for eons. Whoopty do.
 
cryinoutloud [BareFark]
2006-04-10 6:55:35 PM  
So Brad wasn't happy about her giving birth in Paris, I bet he loves this.

How odd do you have to be to think, "Hmmm....the media is all over us, and it's going to get worse when the baby comes. I know!--I'll go have the baby in a third-world country where there are wild animals outside my window. That'll keep those paparazzi away!"

I have to give her maximum points for imagination, however.
 
Teucer
2006-04-10 6:55:54 PM  
TGOT,

Kunta Kinte, behold the only thing greater than yourself!
 
Sinto [OhFark]
2006-04-10 6:56:09 PM  
It's a great setting for her next movie based on the experience: "Womb Raider."
 
TurboCojones
2006-04-10 6:56:42 PM  
My mom sez there are alot of black people in Africa
 
Alphax
2006-04-10 6:57:47 PM  
BTW, any pics of a pregnant Angelina Jolie? That would be hot.
 
TurboCojones
2006-04-10 6:59:48 PM  
Mombutufotuquah and Kutetufarnupah... meet your new brother John
 
Vosh
2006-04-10 7:01:31 PM  
The more money you have, the more slaves you own. The more money you have, the more services you can get from more people. If they don't provide those services, the penalty is homelessness and possibly death, depending on how reliable and safe the homeless shelters are. It's amazing what you can achieve when you own enough slaves.
 
bassman79
2006-04-10 7:05:03 PM  
Axis of Weasel: arent there tigers in africa?

Would someone please hurt Axis of Weasel? That's the second time I've seen that, and that's two times too many!

/AAAAAAHHHH! MY EYES!
 
SaraG
2006-04-10 7:05:54 PM  
if they wanted privacy, then why did they tell everyone and their bloody mother that they were going to africa to have the baby? why not just stay where they were and keep their mouths shut?

(answer: LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEE! I'm having my baby in Africa and you're not! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!)
 
MizzouGuy
2006-04-10 7:07:21 PM  
2006-04-07: Angelina Jolie can't decide if she wants her new baby to be a cheese-eatin' surrender monkey or a Zulu Warrior
 
the_gospel_of_thomas
2006-04-10 7:07:31 PM  
Axis of Weasel, that's just wrong.
 
muninsfire
2006-04-10 7:08:31 PM  
Axis of Weasel

Will you quit sharing? We all know you're a freak; no need to post pictures of yourself to prove it.

Freak.
 
mechugena
2006-04-10 7:09:36 PM  
Axis of Weasel: Thanks...I just got fired as that came on my screen

/kidding
//was already jobless
///not really, just wanted to make you feel bad
///now I feel bad, and have an addiction to slashies
 
Teucer
2006-04-10 7:14:27 PM  
Well whomever the boy is in Weasel's picture, he has a very good sense of humor.
 
Walker [TotalFark]
2006-04-10 7:14:30 PM  
Axis of Weasel:

Well you've gone ahead and given me my nightmare juice for tonight. Thanks.
 
Landofmiddlegirth
2006-04-10 7:14:52 PM  
besides a lame headline, perhaps a photoshop is in order
 
whammer
2006-04-10 7:20:26 PM  
We can only hope that the rumor gets started among the paparazzi that using copious amounts of 'Brut' works as a lion-repellant.
 
black_knight
2006-04-10 7:22:10 PM  
"What could possibly go wrong?"

Tom Cruise locks himself in Brad's and Angelina's closet.
 
The Hypnotoad
2006-04-10 7:24:39 PM  
unfarkingbelievable
No baby has been this big a deal since Jesus. JESUS.
 
ThatsJustWrong!
2006-04-10 7:30:20 PM  
The_gospel_of_Thomas
Axis of Weasel, that's just wrong.

Hrrmm Mkay? You called? :)
 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark]
2006-04-10 7:30:23 PM  
Axis of Weasel
Eyes! Goggles! Nothing!
 
Durendal
2006-04-10 7:33:08 PM  
The celebrity couple and their two adopted children Maddox and Zahara arrived in the southern African country last week

[image from alphabetofmanliness.com too old to be available]

It's good to know that little Maddox is learning the alphabet.
 
SharkInfested
2006-04-10 7:35:06 PM  
will this thread involve the use of the word Snatchlasticity? Will it be in connection with the lions?
 
Jument
2006-04-10 7:39:23 PM  
I for one am rooting for the lions.

Angelina is smokin' hot but I'm tired of reading about the retarded exploits of the super-rich and apparently super-stupid.
 
T.rex
2006-04-10 7:39:35 PM  
Awww. with the dumbass tag, i was hoping the article revlealed that his posh couple was torn apart by lions... In other news, Rodhesian Ridgeback dogs are used in Africa to ward off lions, and they actually love kids, so maybe a better choice.
 
Excen
2006-04-10 7:42:50 PM  
I swear to his noodly appendage that if anything goes wrong during childbirth, something's getting lit on farking fire.

/Infant mortality is obscenely high in Africa
//Hope and pray, you farking wankers!
 
imnotgonnabe
2006-04-10 7:44:32 PM  

Axis of Weasel
arent there tigers in africa?


only in Kenya

/obscure?
//goes back to watching the badgers dance
 
the_gospel_of_thomas
2006-04-10 7:51:46 PM  
[image from images5.theimagehosting.com too old to be available]

/oops, still modified from the last thread I used this ...
 
Lambeau
2006-04-10 7:59:42 PM  
I think I saw this movie already...
 
cryinoutloud [BareFark]
2006-04-10 8:27:10 PM  
Other bestest Fark headline: "Earthquake shakes African country; Kenyans run 26.2 miles away."

Something like that.
 
modernlover
2006-04-10 8:31:02 PM  
axis of weavel

you will be appearing on me and my wife's christmas cards this year
 
Paddy [OhFark]
2006-04-10 8:31:10 PM  
Somehow they are taking a turn to the worse...

[image from affichescinema.com too old to be available]



I heard there's a sequel in the pipeline...
After Bennifer, we now have Brangelina.
Oh world, where have you come to???
 
culturemock
2006-04-10 8:33:29 PM  
Two words: silent birth.
 
CustomAndy
2006-04-10 9:16:27 PM  
"Namibian Afrikaans daily newspaper Die Republikein said the pair had moved from a luxury beach resort..."

Die Republikein? Sounds like my kind of newspaper.
 
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