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(CBS News)   Kansas school board decides that science is too boring and needs a better plot. Flying Spaghetti Monster is victorious   ( divider line
    More: Cool  
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27383 clicks; posted to Main » and Fandom » on 08 Nov 2005 at 6:04 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

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2005-11-08 6:07:05 PM  
2005-11-08 6:07:30 PM  

Where it's okay to go back in time. And to screw your sister. And to conrhole a cousin or two.
2005-11-08 6:07:35 PM  
Touched by his noodly appendage?
2005-11-08 6:07:42 PM  
reason surrenders.
2005-11-08 6:07:55 PM  
What exactly is "cool" about making people dumber, submitter?
2005-11-08 6:07:58 PM  
Yes! Beer volcano and stripper factory for all the kids!
2005-11-08 6:08:04 PM  
Kansas: At least we're not South Carolina or Mississippi.
2005-11-08 6:08:05 PM  
Awwwwww, that so doesn't deserve a "Cool" tag.
2005-11-08 6:08:15 PM  
My aunt lives in Kansas. Hopefully she will move soon, as she has a 5 yr old getting ready for 1st grade.
2005-11-08 6:08:25 PM  
In other news, Clark Kent insists he's from Iowa.
2005-11-08 6:08:26 PM  
Bevets, awaken!
2005-11-08 6:08:29 PM  
Congratulations, people of Kansas. You just became a punchline.
2005-11-08 6:08:47 PM  
Yeeeaah :)
2005-11-08 6:08:53 PM  
I liked this:

In addition, the board rewrote the definition of science, so that it is no longer limited to the search for natural explanations of phenomena.

Ah the old "if you don't fit in, just redefine until you do" defence.
2005-11-08 6:08:53 PM  
That article needs more cowbell!

So what is this "Language" they speak of?
2005-11-08 6:08:54 PM  
Why does Kansas hate America?
2005-11-08 6:08:54 PM  
Wow, what an instructive and fact-filled article. They covered every angle.
2005-11-08 6:09:07 PM  
What's the matter with Kansas?
2005-11-08 6:09:24 PM  
Action Replay Nick: Yes! Beer volcano and stripper factory for all the kids!

RAmen, brotha! RAmen!
2005-11-08 6:09:27 PM  
I feel stupider just being in a neighboring state.
2005-11-08 6:09:33 PM  
"Dust in the Wind" now being performed by a band named "Missouri."
2005-11-08 6:09:43 PM  
Bahahaha....FARK KANSAS! Dumbasses!
2005-11-08 6:09:48 PM  
This should be good.
2005-11-08 6:09:50 PM  
Are they going to teach Scientology too? It's just as credible as any Christian myth. What about Zoroastrianism? The Hindu version of creation?

the ACLU should make sure that every creation myth get's equal time. Every. Single. One.

See how the farktard fundies like it when little Johnny comes home talking about Xenu and the Earth Mother.
2005-11-08 6:10:02 PM  
Drew has no choice now, we MUST have a Kansas tag!
2005-11-08 6:10:08 PM  
I think an emergency memo needs to be distributed to colleges, universities, and employers that students from Kansas should now be shunned Amish style.
2005-11-08 6:10:13 PM  

The article was probably written in theme.
2005-11-08 6:10:19 PM  
Does this mean we Floridians get to pass on the "Stupidest State in the USA" crown now?

Congratulations, Kansas. Enjoy your stay at the top.
2005-11-08 6:10:37 PM  
How is this cool?
2005-11-08 6:10:40 PM  
Hooray Reason.....

2005-11-08 6:10:54 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2005-11-08 6:11:00 PM  
Ha Ha!

/Insert Nelson pic here
2005-11-08 6:11:09 PM  
Revisiting a topic that exposed Kansas to nationwide ridicule six years ago...

obviously not enough.

/and lo, the floodgates were opened.
2005-11-08 6:11:20 PM  
We're happy for the FSM, not the negative impact he'll have on education. More FSM is always a good thing!
2005-11-08 6:11:24 PM  
you're joking?
2005-11-08 6:11:35 PM  
Unbelievable. Stop the planet, I want to get off. 8-(

Truly makes me nervous, as I finish up my teaching degree...what kind of crap am I going to have to get fired over by the time I get placed somewhere? *shudder*
2005-11-08 6:11:39 PM  
submitted from the Guardian with an s-hitter headline.
2005-11-08 6:11:40 PM  
Kansas, go back to Dorothy.

Or in this case, Darwin.

I now claim the right to not hire any Kansasians educated in high school after this date due to your people being completely f*cking retarded.
2005-11-08 6:11:56 PM  
The sad part is there are several other states lining up to pass similar provisions. Kansas may be first, but there are plenty of other sheep ready to follow off the cliff.
2005-11-08 6:11:58 PM  
Now that this is over, we can get back to news about us troops overthrowing autocratic and theocratic regimes.

Oh shiat.
2005-11-08 6:12:02 PM  
Us Kansans just want to stay right in Jesus's eyes.
2005-11-08 6:12:05 PM  
Former President Clinton unavailable for comment from his ranch outside Little Rock, Arkentucky.
2005-11-08 6:12:15 PM  
Never trust a Kansas Doctor.

/That's a pretty big Tumor, we'll need 20 CC's of prayer for that one.
2005-11-08 6:12:26 PM  
Eh, nothing'll change. It's Kansas. Science teachers probably get "YOU LIAR, FOSSILS ARE A SATANIC TRICK" as a matter of course.

I'm sure their record of new scientific advances and achievements (*snorfle*) will remain as stellar as before.
2005-11-08 6:12:31 PM  

"Kansas: At least we're not South Carolina or Mississippi."

HEY!! I live in SC, and let me tell you, there aren't a bunch of toothless hicks down here like you think. It is actually a nice little area, and everyone seems pretty friendly to boot.
2005-11-08 6:12:36 PM  
I cannot fathom how this was accepted. So far, not one single theory has been brought forth validating intelligent design. Clearly, It's just a bunch of religious hogwash.
2005-11-08 6:12:47 PM  
I am embarrassed to live here. Seriously trying to click my heels outta this place.
2005-11-08 6:12:48 PM  
Our Pasta, who art in the Great Pasta Bowl, hallowed be HIS name.
Thy beer volcano come. Thy will totally be done, on Earth as it is in the Great Pasta Bowl.
Give us this day our daily delicious farking noodles.
And forgive us our lack of sauce, As we destroy those who took our sauce from us.
And lead us not into dry, cracked cassarole, But deliver us to the stripper factory.
For HIS might is the kingdom, and the noodly appendage, and the meatballs, for ever and ever.
2005-11-08 6:12:52 PM  
I guess they think even the Vatican is wrong when they say, "Evolution is in the bible." Or, when they say, "We should listen to science."
2005-11-08 6:13:02 PM  
Who would want to learn mechanics in an auto class any way?

All you need to know is put gas in the car and something beyond science takes care of the rest.

Confused? So is Kans.ass
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