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(AZCentral)   National crisis averted: lettuce prices returning to normal levels   ( azcentral.com) divider line
    More: Followup  
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1512 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2002 at 2:02 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

43 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-04-05 02:05:43 AM  
can i ask who is actually gonan be REALLYand I mean REALLY upset if lettuce prices rise? Eat MEAT!!!
2002-04-05 02:05:51 AM  
I couldn't believe it. No lettuce on my Jumbo Jack!
2002-04-05 02:06:04 AM  
I wouldn't know, I'm a salad dodger.
2002-04-05 02:08:30 AM  
*uncocks revolver and pulls gun away from head*

Finally, I can sleep at night.
2002-04-05 02:09:02 AM  
Obligatory "tossing salad" joke goes here

Now if you'd return my petrol levels to under 1.50, I'd be much obliged America
2002-04-05 02:13:02 AM  
Good. Expensive enough in mob-run Chicago as it is. Not that I eat lettuce, but my girlfriend does..
2002-04-05 02:13:14 AM  
Someone notify the King of Romainia. Or Icebergia for that matter...
2002-04-05 02:19:04 AM  
I think the U.S. has trade embargos in the works against Icebergia. Watch the prices go up again!
2002-04-05 02:22:33 AM  
Okay, then screw it. I'm back to eating yard clippings...
2002-04-05 02:29:34 AM  
Romaine and Iceberg are ok, but my favoritest of all the lettuces is George, the quiet one.
2002-04-05 02:30:23 AM  
Guess they were right when they called me crazy for hoarding tons of lettuce and refigerants to cool it.

Right for now that is.
2002-04-05 02:42:10 AM  
I am one happy lettuce eater
2002-04-05 02:49:03 AM  
It could mean the fall of the Romaine empire

(sorry) *skulks off*
2002-04-05 02:51:59 AM  
Man: Doctor, green leaves keep falling out of my ass

(after rectal examination)

Doctor: I've got bad news for you sir. It's only the tip of the Iceberg.
2002-04-05 02:56:27 AM  
So, I built my fortress to protect my lettuce hoard for nothing? That's just great.
2002-04-05 03:12:59 AM  
Try shower fungus, the other green leafy thing.
2002-04-05 03:27:27 AM  
yay! or......um......yeah
2002-04-05 03:30:43 AM  
Well thank god.
2002-04-05 03:31:04 AM  
Man, this bullshiat is just like the rolling blackouts we had here in California during our "energy crisis"* last year. Bullshiat, I tells ye, bullshiat! Who really eats that much iceberg anyhow? It's got no flavour nor does it have any sort of nutritional value to speak of. The Average American ends up just smothering it with cholesterol-ladel and high-fat-fortified ranch dressing anyhow, so it's not like it's anything special, except from a purely financial standpoint. Iceberg was never really a naturally-occurring plant anyhow, it was a crude genetic alteration made by man, with the idea that the higher than normal water content would yield higher than normal dollars. Well, they succeeded.

-he who stacks pork
2002-04-05 03:33:27 AM  
Well, I suppose ther term "ladel" fits, although I really meant to spell "laden", as in "cholesterol-laden"... and you thought I was referring to that terrorist bastard who also contains the word "laden".

-he who stacks pork
2002-04-05 03:50:17 AM  
Lettuce is for holding up my croutons, so they don't become french drenched, and lose their ability to perform their main duty in life, to be crunchy upon their demise. I do love that Wendys Single tho, dang lettuce is 3 times the sandwich, and after years of throwing it on the passenger side of the pickup truck, i seem to have created a sort of compost heap, perhaps i will try to plant lettuce in it. Damn, never mind, i can't find the seeds in my salad, I keep coming up with sunflower. Oh well, I'll save gardening knowledge for later on in life.
2002-04-05 03:52:04 AM  
[image from mediaservice.photoisland.com too old to be available]
Ummm, I think we have bigger problems than lettuce prices!
2002-04-05 03:55:37 AM  
Lettuce have some decent news articles for a change.
2002-04-05 04:00:39 AM  
In other news, the pope took a crap today.
2002-04-05 04:04:16 AM  
I have been at work for a few days...did anybody end up going to the Vanilla Ice Concert the other day?
2002-04-05 04:06:31 AM  
2002-04-05 04:15:13 AM  
Half Tard bio, was this you? don't answer if it was, please.
[image from mediaservice.photoisland.com too old to be available]
2002-04-05 04:20:11 AM  
Hey! That's a Frisky new cut, isn't it?
2002-04-05 04:47:26 AM  
Hytes Xian, yeah it is, nice of you to notice:)
2002-04-05 06:49:08 AM  
[image from geocities.co.jp too old to be available]

I'm sure he'll be happy.
2002-04-05 07:29:37 AM  
Wow, I guess I can finally sleep well tonight. I've been up late going over my finances trying to figure out just how I'm going to be able to afford that head of lettuce this week.

2002-04-05 07:32:10 AM  
the second best thing to be grown hydroponically is lettuce. bib (or boston) lettuce is like butter in your mouth, its soo good. just the lettuce alone is enough. put a little balsamic vinegar on there and you're one happy person.
2002-04-05 07:43:29 AM  
no i'm not
2002-04-05 07:55:14 AM  
Think of the rabbits! Won't someone please think of the rabbits?
2002-04-05 09:02:35 AM  
Wbew! What a re-leaf!
2002-04-05 09:06:49 AM  
In the words of Homer S.

"You don't make friends with salad"
2002-04-05 09:26:47 AM  
God, our college's food service claimed this was the reason for the really crappy lettuce we've had for 2 months. At least now they won't have a real excuse...
2002-04-05 10:20:43 AM  
Since the shortage was due to unusually cold weather, if you're a vegetarian, you ought to be coming out in favor of global warming.
2002-04-05 10:34:26 AM  
Hey, I work in the produce dept. at a Stop and Shop, I've had to deal with lots of pissed off customers for a while now. I hope they get all the lettuce they can stand now, and choke on it.
2002-04-05 10:37:53 AM  
who finds these lettuce links? are they actually out on the internet activly looking for things about lettuce?
2002-04-05 10:55:34 AM  
Good thing I only eat veal.

(nice cabbage head reference fb)
2002-04-05 12:17:08 PM  
Lettuce leaf this thread, and go elsewhere.
2002-04-05 06:55:13 PM  
Whoa my Boobies got changed and is staying at the bottom of the page...
lettuce move on now...
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