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(Union Trib)   Enron turns over 700 boxes of evidence; state attorney discovers 500 of them contain empty pizza boxes, used coffee cups, and chili bowls   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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9663 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Mar 2002 at 2:42 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

54 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-03-27 02:44:48 PM  
Yeah, that's real funny........

farkin' crooks.
2002-03-27 02:45:29 PM  
"We didn't want to be accused of getting rid of any documents at that office," Thode said. "We went above and beyond the call of duty."

I don't think that used food containers qualifies as documents. Idiot.
2002-03-27 02:47:32 PM  
They are just trying to watch expenses. Do you have any idea what dumpster fees are up to nowadays?
2002-03-27 02:48:08 PM  
...Enron's Portland, Ore., officials...

This explains it. They were all stoners. (If only....)
2002-03-27 02:48:41 PM  
Ought to toss every one of the smart ass bastards in the clink.
2002-03-27 02:49:02 PM  
Nothing wrong with a little good humor. The got caught, they lost, mine as well have a party and let the government clean up the trash.
2002-03-27 02:49:22 PM  
I'm quite sure they told our pal Grivas to throw that stuff out :)
2002-03-27 02:49:59 PM  

Enron is so over.
Lets move on to something else...
2002-03-27 02:51:25 PM  
Dang, can you believe the audacity? What surprises me is that they actually still have paid spokeswhores to spout out the corporate lies. After what the company has spewed the last few years, you almost have to assume that the truth is the opposite of whatever they announce.
2002-03-27 02:51:25 PM  
So Enron staffers gulp down pizza and chili all day? Boy, am I not looking forward to this "Women of Enron" issue of Playboy...
2002-03-27 02:52:01 PM  
man, these bozos have some big ass kahunas. You know, it's not like they're all 5 seconds away from being thrown in the can or anything, then they pull a stunt like this.. you gotta love it...
2002-03-27 02:52:26 PM  
I hope the enron bastardos go to jail and get raped by the biggest meanest mofo in there. Those fvckers are killing my stock options because everyone is worried about accounting now.
2002-03-27 02:53:07 PM  
These people should be shot.

Seriously. They're now actively participating in a scam, rather than simply being tools used in the scam. Enron farked over a lot of people, and they're now clearly aware and proud of it.

Contempt of court.
Obstruction of justice.

Lots of charges. They should go from the top to the bottom and make any charge that one individual is convicted of into a conviction for every one of them. Let's let the "a corporation exists as an individual" principle bite itself in the ass.
2002-03-27 02:54:10 PM  
Hey, did anyone else notice the missed transcription? What Thode ACTUALLY said is, ""We went above and beyond the call of DOODY."
2002-03-27 02:54:26 PM  
For benefit of those who won't read an article but still like to pontificate, here's the official line on why this happened: when Enron got the subpoena, it demanded all pertinent documents. Since Enron didn't want to be again accused of destroying info, they included the contents of the recycling bins, into which people throw all paper products, not just documents. That why pizza boxes, paper cups etc.
2002-03-27 02:55:58 PM  
Real funny Eric Thode. Until you get a contempt of court citation, obstruction of justice and hopefully more.

Anyone having anything to do with the slimy Enron debacle should be jailed. And I'm talking the executives not the workers.

When I hear the news bits about Anderson losing over 70 customers and that they may go out of business - I laugh. I laugh loud.

Time to pay the piper, punks. You got caught.
2002-03-27 02:55:58 PM  
Ooh, an article that was rejected on Spiffy day is posted.
2002-03-27 02:56:08 PM  
Enron counsel's response to Bill Lockyer:
"I clearly marked one pile 'Trash' and the other pile 'Stuff to go to California AG.' I guess the custodial staff got it mixed up. Damn Mexicans, don't speak our language. Guess you'll have to go after the custodial services company, it's all their fault...."
2002-03-27 02:56:09 PM  
I'm not surprised; a lot of Enron's actions could be interpreted as delusionally arrogant or terminally stupid. Even working there, I wasn't sure which was the case all the time. Although I began to favor the former. It seemed like they were smoking their own dope toward the end. I recall CEO Jeff Skilling claiming that Enron would become the "World's Leading Company." Someone asked him when we would know we had accomplished it. His answer: "It's kind of like pr0nography; you'll know it when you see it."
2002-03-27 02:59:34 PM  
Mattdog: "Enron is so over. Lets move on to something else..."

Hate to ruin your whole day, but it just started...
2002-03-27 03:04:43 PM  
These people should be shot.

Except for our pal Grivas, and the hotties about to appear in Playboy. We can spare them, they know not what they do.
2002-03-27 03:07:14 PM  
The whole Enron executive board, Kenny-boy included, should be beaten about the head and shoulders and staked out over anthills.

Douchebag motherfarkers.
2002-03-27 03:18:34 PM  
Good for the Fed. Goverment. Enron give them garbage, and the Government acts mildy offended. For that little stunt alone some people at that company should get automatic jailtime for making a mockery of justice. In the end , if some higher ups from both Enron and Arthur Anderson don't do some serious time, I will rule the rest of my life with the Magic Eight Ball.

[image from too old to be available]

2002-03-27 03:29:35 PM  
Sorry, Skinink, no one will take a serious fall for Enron. Junk bond trading ruined fortunes and lives, and Boesky and Milikin did a few years in country club prison (Milikin has somehow restored his public image in the years since). The S&L scandal? The Keating Five continued their terms - John Glenn even got to even be a space hero again. And Neil Bush? Anything happen to him?

The rich and powerful don't go down. They just don't. And it sucks.
2002-03-27 03:33:37 PM  
They're all motherfarkers, all of 'em, I bet the Bush toadies in Justice found it funny as well.

2002-03-27 03:37:38 PM  
You are so right!

This reminds me of a saying an economics prof once told us, "if you own the bank or government $100,000 your in trouble. If you own the bank or government $100,000,000,000 they're in trouble"
2002-03-27 03:41:06 PM  
Typo-for above post. please replace "own" with "owe"
please accpet my deepest heartfelt apologies
2002-03-27 03:42:21 PM  
That's right BillDarryl, they don't go down, and neither do we, their domestic armed forces, ready to keep the peasants in their place.
2002-03-27 03:42:22 PM  
And Accept
2002-03-27 03:43:35 PM  
BillDarryl is absolutely right. None of the big boys in this mess will go down because they have all given Bush tons of money.

I sure hope the scales on satan's pecker face the wrong way and are as sharp as razors while it slides in and out of the asses of these men for eternity.
2002-03-27 03:48:13 PM  
OK, let's say some farker sends the the feds (IRS in this case) some general garbage and (ewww) crumpled tissues along with his reciepts when he gets audited. What will happen to the farker? But this is Enron, so, oh, it's just going beyond the call of duty.

Bet they get a stern scolding from the judge, and a warning..."If you do that again, we'll scold you in writing with very strong language!"
2002-03-27 03:49:52 PM  
if they hadn't fuked thousands out of jobs.... I'd find that funny.... but I'm not laughing..... fukin money greeady whores
2002-03-27 03:53:40 PM  
It's kinda like when it was discovered that Andersen had been shredding, Enron acted holier-than-thou and fired them. A week later, it was discovered that Enron was also shredding and the CEO acted surprised and promised to "get to the bottom of it" and make sure it didn't happen anymore. Heck, it was pretty common knowledge in November that shredding was taking place on a grand scale. Nothing like this surprises me anymore.
2002-03-27 03:57:48 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
I found this on the Smoking Gun - honest.
2002-03-27 04:08:25 PM  
holyshiat.. and i thought the title was a joke....
2002-03-27 04:16:23 PM  
"Hi, we're Enron, and we're trying really hard to land ourselves in a Federal pound-us-in-the-ass prison..."
2002-03-27 04:17:46 PM  
The D.A. should be laughing his head off at this lark while he siezes the entire office.
2002-03-27 04:51:59 PM  
Pizza boxes and chili bowls?

Guess we know where they got all that natural gas now.
2002-03-27 04:57:10 PM  
Can someone please explain to me what the Bush administration has to do with any of this?

I mean, I agree, these executives should go to prison, and not white guy prison, I mean come here I wanna kiss you prison. That said, I haven't seen anything, besides campaign donations, that connect Enron to the Bush Admin.

And for all you democrats that hate Bush, keep in mind that Clinton was taking campaign donations from the Chinese at the same time they were stealing Nuclear Secrets. I know some Republicans thought it was a conspiracy, but I asked them for proof as well that Clinton was giving the secrets away, and there was nothing.

What ever happened to innocent until proven guilty?
2002-03-27 05:07:37 PM  
Innocent until proven guilty?

OhmyGod, stop .. my sides are aching.. I'm gonna bust a gut.
2002-03-27 05:24:53 PM  
Hitman7s, I think the problem that democrats and most independants have with the Enron/Bush thing is the perception of wrong doing. Even before Enron went down the crapper Congress was wanting information about Enron's input into the nation's energy plan. The answer that was given was that Enron's money had no influence over the decision process, but evidence points to the opposite. And when the congress asked for documents that might clear up the confusion about this, they have been blocked, stymied, and hampered by the administration at every turn. This looks like Bush and the administration are trying to hide something.

The only reason such a big deal is being made of this is because Bush is acting like he is guilty. There may be nothing wrong, but because Bush refuses to release any evidence one way or the other, most people will asume that if he was innocent in this then he would release the information.

And as for the comparison between the Clinton/China connection to the Bush/Enron connection. Clinton was very forth coming with information about this when it was revealed and returned the money that was donated to his campaign. Also there is no creditable evidence that China took part in deciding any federal policy (yes, there are people that say they did but they also wear tin foil beanies).
2002-03-27 05:35:26 PM  
Just thought y'all might be interested in this:

[image from too old to be available]

Caption from the Houston Chronicle website:
Todd Norris, top left, of Neon Electric Corp. has a bird's-eye view Tuesday as the last Enron Field sign is removed. The Astros are in discussions to sell the naming rights, but new signs won't go up for at least another month. Ownership of the old signs has not been determined.
2002-03-27 05:39:19 PM  
I would be willing to put money down that if any of the Enron Execs go to prison for this that they get their sentences commuted by Bush. They have nothing to worry about.
2002-03-27 07:27:12 PM  
These guys are real scumbags.
2002-03-27 08:07:58 PM  
Don't go pointing the finger at me. Maybe those are mostly my pizza boxes, but I didn't take any important documents. I am happy with my 500 staplers.
2002-03-27 08:39:20 PM  
i think it needs a hero tag - enron are the funniest thing KPMG released their theme song
2002-03-27 09:31:07 PM  
Grivas: are they the Swingway model, or that other POS that binds up like a 12 yr old Taiwanese whore- not that I'd know much about that. Staplers anyway...
2002-03-27 10:07:27 PM  
I'm sorry, this is funny as all hell. Might as well get a few get shots in if they're going down.
2002-03-28 12:26:34 AM  
"It took seven deputies two full days to get through little more than half the boxes..."

ok,let's say that a deputy makes $20 and hour and one full day = eight hours. One dputy would get paid $160 a day. Seven deputies would then get $2240 for looking through Enron's trash. And our tax money paid for it.

They didn't cost people enough already?
2002-03-28 08:12:37 AM  
*slaps Grivas around a bit with a Swingline stapler*
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