Skip to content
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(   Jesus Chainsaw Massacre now available with half the spatter   ( divider line
    More: Spiffy  
•       •       •

21810 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Feb 2005 at 9:12 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

1088 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Newest

2005-02-11 10:04:24 AM  
Thomas edison didn't believe either.

(on prayer) "The endeavour to change universal power by selfish supplication I do not believe in." ~Thomas Edison"

I'm not saying christians aren't intelligent, there are plenty of people who are perfectly brilliant people who believe in god. I'm just saying not all athiests are "OMG HAHAHA GOD SUXS" idiots.
2005-02-11 10:04:27 AM  
Hmm, the Passion Of The Christ is constantly critisized in fark headlines because Mel Gibson has the nerve to be a conservative but Farenheit 911 never seems to be ridiculed.

I sense a tinge of bias here..
2005-02-11 10:05:34 AM  

I see the mindless sheep as the ones who are blindly loyal only to their own delusions of pseudo-intellectual superiority.

of course having blind loyalty to someone else's delusions and gaining your own little perch of superiority is kinda nice, too.
2005-02-11 10:05:40 AM  
I don't care if you ADD violence to the film, a couple of days of torture doesn't equal what hundreds of thousands of people have gone through all over the world, from prisoners of war to victims of terrible wasting diseases. And what does that have to do with my life today? The idea that making the "scourging" really graphic -- and literally adding insult to injury by depicting people yelling at Jesus -- helps us to understand "what Jesus went through" are living in some kind of storybook fantasyland where the suffering of a man 2000 years ago is some kind of magic cross-temporal sin eraser because, to God, sin is like kryptonite, and Jesus dying (even though he was only dead for 2 1/2 days or so) is some kind of "Get out of Hell Free" card. It's savage. It's primitive. It's Cosmology for Dummies.
2005-02-11 10:06:30 AM  
2005-02-11 10:02:19 AM Jsimmons38040

I have a slightly different quote from Al.

" religious basis is necessary."
~ Albert Einstein"

Ummmm.... There IS a difference between believing in god/God/gods and being a "religious" person.
2005-02-11 10:07:35 AM  
"I am a deeply religious nonbeliever.... This is a somewhat new kind of religion."

Letter to Hans Muehsam March 30, 1954; Einstein Archive 38-434
2005-02-11 10:07:39 AM  

I do not believe in god either, but I have always had a strong feeling that I am wrong.

Interesting dilemma there. Why do you think you are wrong?
2005-02-11 10:08:07 AM  
[but Farenheit 911 never seems to be ridiculed]

whatWhatWHAT???? I'm must be new here.
2005-02-11 10:08:08 AM  
I know! Let's all go see this movie, and at the end, we'll all sing "Always look on the bright side of life!"
2005-02-11 10:08:23 AM  

"A man's ethical behaviour should be based effectually on sympathy,
education, and social ties and needs; no religious basis is necessary.
Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of
punishment and hope of reward after death.
~ Albert Einstein"

I will add

"Religion is for the weak of mind." Phil Herup

//raising my boy Catholic, then he can grow up and come the same conclusion that I did.
2005-02-11 10:08:24 AM  
Hmm, the Passion Of The Christ is constantly critisized in fark headlines because Mel Gibson has the nerve to be a conservative but Farenheit 911 never seems to be ridiculed.

Jesus Palamino, you jackholes have to insert Moore into everything. What do a flick about Christ's death and the Moore film have to do with each other?

You're frickin' brain dead, dude.
2005-02-11 10:08:38 AM  
Gibson invented a new film genre: Christian Snuff.
2005-02-11 10:10:10 AM  
"We shouldn't bother paying attention to a guy who flings his own feces around".

Sounds to me like the kind of guy you need to keep an eye on.
2005-02-11 10:10:51 AM  
Jesus said that they would hate us Christians. This thread proves he was right - as usual.
2005-02-11 10:11:06 AM  
Except that the passion probably had more truth than F9/11.
2005-02-11 10:11:08 AM  
Mr. Clarence Butterworth

Jesus Palamino, you jackholes have to insert Moore into everything. What do a flick about Christ's death and the Moore film have to do with each other?

it's further proof of teh lib-u-ral bias inherent in anything that isn't ....well, conservative biased.

and yes, you imagined all of those snarky michael moore headlines in the past. these are not the droids you are looking for.
2005-02-11 10:11:13 AM  

I really like that site actually, especially the whole fridge magnet gig. "The magnets allowed human beings to pay $14 to commit the unforgivable sin, thus damning ones eternal soul forever and ever to hell (estimated one soul per magnet set)."
2005-02-11 10:12:11 AM  
and yes, you imagined all of those snarky michael moore headlines in the past. these are not the droids you are looking for.

I guess I did. Dumbass Bush-bots.
2005-02-11 10:12:33 AM  

I'm speaking to the "I said it on Fark, therefore it is a concrete law of nature and the universe" crowd. The teachings of Jesus have been around a long time and have stood the test of time. Sure, people have corrupted and soiled the good faith of Chritianity on their own doing, but the teachings and the philosophies are still intact. Christians should not be judged as a whole by the actions of a few; nor should Christians judge others. That is God's job.
2005-02-11 10:12:42 AM  

Pure gut instinct, I have never been able to explain it.
2005-02-11 10:13:14 AM  
The next time you aregue with a christian remember that christians beleive in ghosts.
2005-02-11 10:13:34 AM  
"Someone should make a 2 hour movie of Santa crying so that adults will believe in him also."
2005-02-11 10:13:59 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2005-02-11 10:14:40 AM  
The next time you misspell remember to use the preview before post.
2005-02-11 10:14:51 AM  
LittleSmitty: Bah, read the book. Movies never capture the essence of a good book.

they made a book out of that?
2005-02-11 10:15:30 AM  
I'm not a God botherer, but I was under the impression that Newton was a completely batshiat insanse uber-Christian. Has the BBC been lying to me again?
2005-02-11 10:16:17 AM  
"Every one who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that a spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe - a spirit vastly superior to that of man, and one in the face of which we with our modest powers must feel humble. In this way the pursuit of science leads to a religious feeling of a special sort, which is indeed quite different from the religiosity of someone more naive."
Albert Einstein

"There are more sure marks of authenticity in the Bible than in any profane history."
Sir Isaac Newton

"All human discoveries seem to be made only for the purpose of confirming more and more the truths contained in the Sacred Scriptures."
Sir William Herschel

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."
Galileo Galilei

"If we find the answer [the unified theory], it would be the ultimate triumph of human reason - for we would know the mind of God."
Stephen Hawking

"I give myself over to my rapture. I tremble; my blood leaps. God has waited 6000 years for a looker-on to His work."
Johannes Kepler

I couldn't find the newton quote I had previously seen.

Thats what color the sky is in my world. Next.
2005-02-11 10:16:31 AM  
Re:Add the word some before Christians and you would not look so intolerant and predjudiced yourself.

I should have said many.
Didn't mean to sound like a troll but,
I do take it personally when someone or a group of someones has very little tolerance for different life styles or opinions on science or other religions.

These same somebodys expecting you to step aside when their religion is interjected into our schools, government, courts...

PS. I dont feel like a tumor.
The name is implied as a tumor attached to the almighty.
2005-02-11 10:17:07 AM  
I'll wait for the book.
2005-02-11 10:17:16 AM  
Just like seeing all muslims as "towel headed terrorists", judging all christians by the loud yammerings of folks like Jerry Falwell and Mel Gibson is inaccurate and simplistic. Unforunately, it is always the fringes of every group that make the most noise, so that all people of the christian faith get the "fundie" label put on them.
I am a practicing christian(Lutheran, if you were wondering), and I saw Passion. You know what? It did not change my faith or my views one way ot the other. It is a movie. Just a movie. Hating it doesn't make you a christian basher, liking it doesn't make you a religius sheep. It is just a movie.
2005-02-11 10:17:52 AM  
You want the difference between M. Moore and M. Gibson? Here it is:

Michael Moore showed us a movie intending to convince us of his position, which was that we should question the motives, claims and actions of our leaders in these particular matters.

Mel Gibson showed us a movie intending to convince us of his position, which was that a man named Jesus was a magical demigod who ended up in a position -- possibly with God's participation -- where he was beat up and crucified, and that this event somehow fulfilled a symbolic function wherein the event, combined with our unthinking faith in the idea that Jesus, despite dying and ascending, is hanging around nearby, "saves" me from... well, from God, I guess.

The difference? Moore may bend the truth, but at least he made a movie about real people and real situations, not savage, ancient fairy tales.
2005-02-11 10:18:52 AM  
Yeah, electro Jesus is always right, cos' he incarnated as Nostradamus so he knows when a thread on Fark is erupting in a Bash teh Christians fest

for all you Dutch farkers, read "Alias Paulus" from T. Voskuilen for a new perspective. Don't know if it already has been translated in English.
2005-02-11 10:19:55 AM  
This Here Giraffe,

Newton was deeply religious. He just happened to come along at the time when the church had gone from the fathers of modern(modern for thier time, that is) science to trying to dispel the very things they were discovering. And the Earth not being the center of the universe was contrary to common beliefs of the time.
2005-02-11 10:19:58 AM  
What Christians don't understand is that the foundation for their beliefs came from Plato.

See: The Republic/Cave Story
Written some 350years before baby Jesus was born.

//Damnit, Mary! Your farking baby is crying again!
2005-02-11 10:20:10 AM  

I thought you were 'funning' in your previous post, but now it seems your conundrum is legit. Quite a dichotomy, isn't it?

Similar to my duality: a liberal Christian

/liked 'Passion" AND 'Fahrenheit.'
2005-02-11 10:20:21 AM  
""The church says the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the church." Ferdinand Magellan"

this game is fun!

/I'm gonna go make a sammich, it's impossible to convince either me or you any differently so i'm doing the smart thing and not trying
2005-02-11 10:20:59 AM  
I guess this is my major objection to the film :
It seems to glorify the negative aspects of the life of Christ and be designed to upset people into further belief rather than putting the emphasis on the positive side and trying to INSPIRE people into further belief.

The gore is just fun to tease about , but the general theme of the film seemed to be "See? See?!? You should feel bad aboput this!!!"
2005-02-11 10:21:13 AM  
Let me be the first.
Shut up barjockey, you cock.
2005-02-11 10:21:51 AM  
I want a special edition with alternate endings. The whole "rise from the dead" thing just spoiled the flick for me.
2005-02-11 10:24:11 AM  
TurnerBrown: Face it. You just like bashing christians.

Got it in one, turnerbrown! Welcome to FARK.

Oh yes, Shut up BARJOCKEY, you cock. Second! WOOT!
2005-02-11 10:24:38 AM  
"Shake off all the fears of servile prejudices, under which weak minds are servilely crouched. Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call on her tribunal for every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear."
Thomas Jefferson (Letter to Peter Carr, Aug. 10, 1787)

"Since our inner experiences consist of reproductions, and combinations of sensory impressions, the concept of a soul without a body seem to me to be empty and devoid of meaning."
Albert Einstein

"Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration--courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and, above all, love of the truth."
Henry Louis Mencken

"I believe in Spinoza's God who reveals himself in the orderly harmony of what exists, not in a God who concerns himself with fates and actions of human beings.


I do not believe in the immortality of the individual, and I consider ethics to be an exclusively human concern with no superhuman authority behind it.

The religion of the future will be a cosmic religion. It should transcend a personal God and avoid dogmas and theology. Covering both natural and spiritual, it should be based on a religious sense arising from the experience of all things, natural and spiritual and a meaningful unity. Buddhism answers this description. If there is any religion that would cope with modern scientific needs, it would be Buddhism..."
- Einstein again
2005-02-11 10:24:43 AM  

Excuse me, I'm not exactly "feelin' the love" here. And if you haven't already noticed, it is in fact a "Bash teh Christians fest" already.
2005-02-11 10:25:13 AM  
That's the impression I got:

"See! See what this guy had to go through with for you puny humans? Now you better get right with God or he's going to fark your shiat up for all eternity! Got it? Good!"
2005-02-11 10:25:22 AM  
Gibson invented a new film genre: Christian Snuff.

Now all we need is a series based on the lives of the saints.

A wealth of gory, often oddly homoerotic, martyrdoms to choose from:

[image from too old to be available]
2005-02-11 10:25:33 AM  

I do not think any responsible academian will dispute Jesus existed since he is well documented in sources outside the bible and even outside chritianity. He was just not the son of god(unless I am wrong, then I will probably be going to hell).
2005-02-11 10:25:53 AM  

"Dawn of the christ" perhaps?
2005-02-11 10:26:19 AM  
This thread is useless without Mike_71
2005-02-11 10:26:36 AM  

any way you slice it, religion essentially comes down to 'some guy said this, and i believe it'.

and yes, i know there's a lot more baggage to it than that, but just for a second view christianity thru the same lense that you do hinduism, or islam, or hell...even 7th day adventists or mormons. even within the christian faith, there are examples that you would probably find...particularly non-divinely inspired. that's how a non believer views christianity. some guy said some stuff, people believe it, and there are good & bad effects.

and this isn't so much directed at you, as...the general persecution-complex crowd.... this is fark. people here tend to have few sacred cows. post a picture of the hottest chick on the planet, and somebody will call attention to her pointy knees. when some yammering knob has little more to say than 'fark jesus!', you aren't being persecuted. you are on the internet. you have to wade thru stupidity in every other thread on this site, so i'm at a loss for how this angle makes you a unique persecuted little snowflake.
2005-02-11 10:26:55 AM  


As far as the tollerence thing, I have found most christians to be more accepting of other people than your basic non-christian, with some loud mothed exceptions of course.

Tolerance levels are lower if tolerance is defined as anything is OK, there is no right or wrong. Most people wont accept that in words/communication, in their pet's behavior, or in science. Why should we accept it in our world view?

Sorry, may not be able to respond. The boss is around;)
2005-02-11 10:26:57 AM  
I just like to bash the ones that invite me to their church for Starbucks and assloads of donuts.

They say things like: "I believe women have too many rights. I am subservient to my husband. Now let's watch the Blue Collar Comedy special!"
Displayed 50 of 1088 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Newest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

In Other Media
Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.