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(Detroit News)   Apparently unfamiliar with Snopes, Detroit News writes story about GM's history of vehicular nomenclature malfunctions   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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26514 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Dec 2004 at 2:47 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

166 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-12-27 09:24:11 AM  
Apparently The Detroit News' fact-checking department is on vacation. The "Nova = Won't Go" is an urban legend.
2004-12-27 09:31:58 AM  
I am sure there was something on fark about this before (more than a year ago).
2004-12-27 09:32:41 AM  
You've got to love that Journalistic integrity
2004-12-27 09:39:30 AM  
Sometimes, naming a product after a masturbatory term can help sales.

For example - Whack-O-Lube.
2004-12-27 09:47:34 AM  
I'm waiting for the Chrysler Fap to go on sale.
2004-12-27 09:50:47 AM  
Journalistic Integrity, labman? Did you get that pairing from the same book that gives us Millitary Intelligence and Icy Hot?
2004-12-27 09:58:11 AM  
Most car names are, by their very existence, crap.
2004-12-27 10:10:55 AM  
The Chevy Nova legend lives on in countless marketing textbooks, is repeated in numerous business seminars, and is a staple of newspaper and magazine columnists who need a pithy example of human folly. Perhaps someday this apocryphal tale will become what it should be: an illustration of how easily even "experts" can sometimes fall victim to the very same dangers they warn us about.

2004-12-27 10:30:47 AM  

The whole "Nova = "doesn't go" tale was merely another in a long line of automotive jokes, like the ones about "Ford" being an acronym for "Fix or repair daily" or "Found on road dead"

but those aren't jokes.
2004-12-27 10:39:49 AM  
Whew, guess driving a Chevy Butt-Plug isn't as embarrassing as I thought.
2004-12-27 10:40:16 AM  
Should be named Honda Celibate:
[image from too old to be available]
Your own penis will reject you if you drive one of these.
2004-12-27 10:47:03 AM  
I love my new GM Wanker !
2004-12-27 10:49:51 AM  
why use slang terms? I love my Ford Penis. The old lady? she can't get enough of her Subaru Masturbate.
2004-12-27 10:49:51 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Meet the new 2006 Dodge Blumpkin
2004-12-27 11:07:22 AM  
My Dad wanted a Saturn Urinary Tract Infection, but I got him to upgarde to the Labia Canker.
2004-12-27 11:08:41 AM  
I'm more mystified by the fact that Razor USA seems to think they are the only ones who can use the name "Razor." So do Gilette and Schick have to rename thier products "Facial hair removal device?"
2004-12-27 11:42:35 AM  
Namestakes for common products have different rules.

"Razor USA" manufactures motored vehicles. Thus, by having a Chevy Razor (or whatever company wanted), should Razor USA's sales start to falter, they could claim it was because of Chevy using their product name, thus asking for damages unless royalties are paid for each car sold.
2004-12-27 11:43:57 AM  
I still think Uranus is a better name than Saturn.

Uranus, there is no substitute.

Uranus, ask the man who owns one.

Nothing runs like Uranus.
2004-12-27 11:44:39 AM  
Same thing with "Monster" cables, right?
2004-12-27 11:45:32 AM  
The Buick Wanker?
2004-12-27 11:57:52 AM  
They are instead reserving the name for the sport edition.
2004-12-27 12:00:50 PM  
I can see the logic in that InfamousG, but common products? I guess there are things in this world I'm not meant to understand.
HPZ [TotalFark]
2004-12-27 12:18:59 PM  
This headline does not poke nearly enough fun at the authors of this ridiculously out-of-touch article. Lemme see if I can fix that.
HPZ [TotalFark]
2004-12-27 12:35:38 PM  
Now that I've rtfa, I think it's the submitter who's out of touch.
2004-12-27 02:54:30 PM  
"Tension is always more interesting," Manning said. "Crossfire works because it's exciting, a little edgy, and the danger of being caught in crossfire is good. People buying sports cars like that faux sense of 'I'm a dangerous, risk-taking, 007 kinda guy.' "

This IS a joke right? A car company from Detroit...this crossfire is "good"?
2004-12-27 02:54:39 PM  

BWAHAHAHAHAH. that was great.
2004-12-27 02:55:43 PM  
I drive Honda Moneyshot.
2004-12-27 02:56:13 PM  
Just yesterday I saw a 2005 MrCasual's Giant Wang.
2004-12-27 02:57:36 PM  
this = thinks

mea culpa.
2004-12-27 03:00:21 PM  
And just like that, el_hueso wins the thread.
2004-12-27 03:00:54 PM  
I just bought a Chrysler Cunnilingus. I really liked the cosmopolitan sounding name.

Friend of mine is driving the new Fellatio from Mitsubishi. She was thinking about getting a Daewoo Dirty Sanchez (the new economy car) but didn't like the color.
2004-12-27 03:01:10 PM  
I want to get one of those Volkswagen Toe Rags.
2004-12-27 03:01:52 PM  

She was thinking about getting a Daewoo Dirty Sanchez (the new economy car) but didn't like the color.

or the "new car smell"
2004-12-27 03:01:56 PM  
Considered: Hep Cat, Beaver, Detroiter, El Tigre. According to legend, the Thunderbird's giant wings stirred the winds

As ripe as the moniker "Beaver" would be for innuendo, I'd give my left nut for a car named "Hep Cat".
2004-12-27 03:02:02 PM  
What, nothing about the Mitsubishi Pajero?

/pretty happy with my Isuzu Wizard Trooper
2004-12-27 03:03:33 PM  
Your mom goes to college.
2004-12-27 03:05:00 PM  
I think the Chrysler "Hovergoat" would do well.
2004-12-27 03:05:32 PM  
Anyone ever interview to be a journalist before? I am curious what the process is. Seriously.
2004-12-27 03:05:43 PM  
My marketing professor told that story too. He didn't like me 'cos I pointed out that its an urban legend.
2004-12-27 03:06:07 PM  
I also heard that Volkswagen, in its never-ending "cuteness" trend, is coming out with the Honeypot convertible. The roof apparently splits in the middle and folds sideways.
2004-12-27 03:07:01 PM  
I like Honda's big screw-up alot more. They launched the Honda Fitta a few years back, unaware that fitta means pussy in swedish...
2004-12-27 03:07:24 PM  
"Hunter may be a good name for some people who like to hunt, but may be bad for animal activists," said Lincoln Merrihew, managing director of the automotive practice at Boston-based consultants Compete Inc.

So if I was a Virgo and wanted a Ford... I definitely wouldn't be getting a Taurus, right? Because that would just be traumatic.

On the other hand, driving any kind of Ford might be traumatic for anyone. =)
2004-12-27 03:07:41 PM  
Besides, Dude...Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian American, please.
2004-12-27 03:08:22 PM  
Um, hummer anyone?
2004-12-27 03:09:37 PM  
i don't know how many times I heard this story during business school. no one would listen when I called shenanigans, either.
2004-12-27 03:10:15 PM  
Born_In_A_Shed: Um, hummer anyone?

You offering?
2004-12-27 03:11:13 PM  
Let's not forget these classics, seen when I lived in Japan:

Hijet Dumbo
Suzuki Cappucino - best car named after a type of coffee (sorry if the spelling's off)
Escudo - best car named after Portuguese money
Nissan Figaro - best car named after an opera character
Honda Beat - named long before the LaCrosse
Honda Today - with a decal down the side that read "Good design Limited edition" that made me wonder about the design quality of the other editions

And nobody's mentioned the "Hummer" yet?
2004-12-27 03:11:16 PM  
Thank you, Snopes Nazis, for obscuring the truly funny portion of the story, that GM only narrowly avoided selling in Quebec a car with the name of a local slang term for masturbation.

In other news, they call wanking off "LaCrosse" in Quebec? Do they wear protective equipment, too?
2004-12-27 03:14:31 PM  
I'm just glad the Ford Thunderbird wasn't called the "Beaver".....I can hear it now !

/Not today guys, I'm waxing my Beaver.
/For the first 1,000 miles, you must break the Beaver in gently.
/Last night I got drunk, and wrecked my Beaver.

....Please add on, you creative Farkers. :-)
2004-12-27 03:14:37 PM  
Can't wait to see the new car, the 2005 Dodge Bukakke.
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