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(Zillow)   Proper staging is key to selling your haunted house   (zillow.com) divider line
53
    More: Weird  
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4448 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2023 at 11:54 PM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
theteacher [TotalFark]
2023-03-07 8:34:01 PM  
Grammar ghost. "Most all props, etc can be purch sep."
 
raerae1980 [TotalFark]
2023-03-07 8:37:34 PM  
Shut up and take my money!   They have a farkin' casket...like, it is Halloween all year long in that house.  I ❤ it.  These folks are my soulmates.

/ my skulls would fit right in!
 
KarmicDisaster [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 8:42:08 PM  
What's the deal with no toilet paper in the toilets and "outdoor portable bathrooms ". Sounds like they have a severe septic problem, not everyone wants to deal with that.
 
fragMasterFlash [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 9:10:58 PM  
Do you like head cheese?
 
Jesus McSordid [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 9:12:41 PM  
Two acres of shiat land.
 
Rage Against the Thorazine [TotalFark]
2023-03-07 9:25:05 PM  
photos.zillowstatic.comView Full Size


external-content.duckduckgo.comView Full Size
 
EvilEgg [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 9:33:27 PM  
I bet they have some skeletons in their closet.
 
mjjt [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 10:48:37 PM  
3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?
 
Rage Against the Thorazine [TotalFark]
2023-03-07 11:04:33 PM  

mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?


No worse. It's in Texas.
 
Ass_Master_Flash [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 11:14:04 PM  

raerae1980: Shut up and take my money!   They have a farkin' casket...like, it is Halloween all year long in that house.  I ❤ it.  These folks are my soulmates.

/ my skulls would fit right in!


But, Texas
 
raerae1980 [TotalFark]
2023-03-07 11:22:32 PM  

Ass_Master_Flash: raerae1980: Shut up and take my money!   They have a farkin' casket...like, it is Halloween all year long in that house.  I ❤ it.  These folks are my soulmates.

/ my skulls would fit right in!

But, Texas


It just adds to the horror- theme 😄
 
mjjt [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-07 11:23:17 PM  

Rage Against the Thorazine: mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?

No worse. It's in Texas.

Fark user imageView Full Size


It's got at least 2 breweries and a vinyard, so can't be that bad, can it?

So you'd have to get a couple of handguns and a hat, and trade the Prius for a pickup
 
austerity101
2023-03-08 12:01:42 AM  

mjjt: Rage Against the Thorazine: mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?

No worse. It's in Texas.

[Fark user image image 850x445]

It's got at least 2 breweries and a vinyard, so can't be that bad, can it?

So you'd have to get a couple of handguns and a hat, and trade the Prius for a pickup


I mean, as long as you're not someone who can get pregnant, or a queer person, and you're white, I'm sure it's fine.
 
SloppyFrenchKisser
2023-03-08 12:02:06 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
roofmonkey
2023-03-08 12:02:37 AM  
Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses
 
Claude Ballse
2023-03-08 12:05:56 AM  
I guess it's easier to leave the trash in place and sell this place as a "Haunted House" than it is to rent a dumpster and hire some day laborers from the Home Depot parking lot to clean it out.

With the added bonus of camouflaging all of the structural faults of the home.

/looking at you, front door gaps.
 
Lunakki
2023-03-08 12:07:31 AM  

roofmonkey: Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses


Hey, I'm a woman who was born in Texas, and only three things on that list apply to me!
 
morg
2023-03-08 12:07:41 AM  
The decor is haunted haunted house, the house itself is a murder house.
 
DiDGr8 [BareFark]
2023-03-08 12:09:52 AM  

KarmicDisaster: What's the deal with no toilet paper in the toilets and "outdoor portable bathrooms ". Sounds like they have a severe septic problem, not everyone wants to deal with that.


They are open as a "Haunted Estate" on Saturday and the last Friday of October. From 7:30pm to Midnight. For $15. They may very well have a septic problem, but who knows what visitors have been trying to flush.
 
roofmonkey
2023-03-08 12:15:15 AM  

Lunakki: roofmonkey: Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses

Hey, I'm a woman who was born in Texas, and only three things on that list apply to me!


I love Texan girls like I love eating really extremely overly ridiculously hot peppers.
I know I'll regret it sooner or later but I just can't help myself; maybe this time it will be worth it...
 
X-Geek
2023-03-08 12:16:20 AM  
It was called "13 Vultures"

The only Google review:

DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME!

Decided to go last minute. When you walk in there is a small sign that says Cash Only $15/Person. Then there is a FOOD TRUCK to your left selling food and hot chocolate. On your right is the line. We got in line and waited 40 MINUTES! While we were waiting they had a group of people doing the thriller dance every 5 minutes for entertainment for people in the line. We got to the front and we were told we needed to purchase our tickets at the "ticket booth" also known as the FOOD TRUCK. So he told us we had to go get tickets and then get back in line at the back. As we started to ask questions he ignored us and yelled out for everyone else in line that tickets needed to be purchased at the "ticket booth" a.k.a. FOOD TRUCK. A lot of people didn't know this as well and had to get out of line to go purchase tickets. Obviously mad we decided it wasn't worth it and decided to just leave. Sadly I can't get my time back. Don't waste your time like we did.

1. There should be a sign saying that you need to purchase tickets either at the entrance or on the "ticket booth" a.k.a FOOD TRUCK.

2. If you don't want to put a sign maybe put a person at the entrance to tell people they need to purchase tickets.

3. Instead of having people do the same boring dance EVERY 5 MINUTES. Maybe have them go around and let people know they need to purchase tickets.


/FOOD TRUCK
 
Claude Ballse
2023-03-08 12:27:35 AM  

roofmonkey: Lunakki: roofmonkey: Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses

Hey, I'm a woman who was born in Texas, and only three things on that list apply to me!

I love Texan girls like I love eating really extremely overly ridiculously hot peppers.
I know I'll regret it sooner or later but I just can't help myself; maybe this time it will be worth it...


There's really two types of Texan women out there:

1. Airheads that just want to be subservient to idiot Texan men and can't think for themselves.
2. Intelligent, educated Texas women who are smart enough that they know to never marry a Texan.

/wife is native Texan
//lots of Texan women like her prefer Californian men
///after hearing stories from her and her friends about past relationships, I understand why
////Californians are coming for your women folk, Texas
 
genner
2023-03-08 12:30:41 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
roofmonkey
2023-03-08 12:40:42 AM  

Claude Ballse: roofmonkey: Lunakki: roofmonkey: Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses

Hey, I'm a woman who was born in Texas, and only three things on that list apply to me!

I love Texan girls like I love eating really extremely overly ridiculously hot peppers.
I know I'll regret it sooner or later but I just can't help myself; maybe this time it will be worth it...

There's really two types of Texan women out there:

1. Airheads that just want to be subservient to idiot Texan men and can't think for themselves.
2. Intelligent, educated Texas women who are smart enough that they know to never marry a Texan.

/wife is native Texan
//lots of Texan women like her prefer Californian men
///after hearing stories from her and her friends about past relationships, I understand why
////Californians are coming for your women folk, Texas


Yeah and then there are the Ukrainian ladies. Like Texans with a sexier accent.
 
Neondistraction
2023-03-08 12:42:02 AM  

genner: [Fark user image 707x491]


My favorite part of that episode is the very end where the robot is hiding from Danzig next door.

"I cannot live with that guy.  He's so frightening, he's so annoying, and he doesn't wear a shirt!"
 
ukexpat
2023-03-08 12:45:06 AM  
Not even Abby Sciutto would live in that dump.
 
Markoff_Cheney [recently expired TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-08 12:50:50 AM  

raerae1980: Shut up and take my money!   They have a farkin' casket...like, it is Halloween all year long in that house.  I ❤ it.  These folks are my soulmates.

/ my skulls would fit right in!


It is wicked cool, aside from the location. The work put in there is just... I love it.
 
2wolves [TotalFark]
2023-03-08 1:19:07 AM  

morg: The decor is haunted haunted house, the house itself is a murder house.


Because who would ever know.
 
netfreq
2023-03-08 1:33:45 AM  
That's a bold strategy, cotton (let's see if it pays off for him)
 
SBinRR [OhFark]
2023-03-08 1:44:08 AM  
Does that Partridge Family bus come with it?
 
The Southern Dandy
2023-03-08 2:18:41 AM  
JAMIE!!!

thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size
 
ansius
2023-03-08 4:31:17 AM  
On the outside: Looks like the house from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

On the inside: ...
 
My Sober Alt
2023-03-08 4:55:38 AM  

KarmicDisaster: What's the deal with no toilet paper in the toilets and "outdoor portable bathrooms ". Sounds like they have a severe septic problem, not everyone wants to deal with that.


That's the scariest thing to me.  I once had a friend from South America who tossed toilet paper in the waste basket. I never told her she didn't have to do that. She was far too cute for that.
 
winedrinkingman
2023-03-08 4:58:44 AM  

mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?


The plumbing is a disaster and it is in the middle of Trumpland, so worse than all of that
 
My Sober Alt
2023-03-08 5:00:31 AM  

Claude Ballse: I guess it's easier to leave the trash in place and sell this place as a "Haunted House" than it is to rent a dumpster and hire some day laborers from the Home Depot parking lot to clean it out.

With the added bonus of camouflaging all of the structural faults of the home.

/looking at you, front door gaps.


Baird, Texas doesn't have a Home Depot
 
wxboy
2023-03-08 5:54:18 AM  

mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?


Worse, the Interstate. Like, the street address is literally I-20.
 
Cheron
2023-03-08 6:00:38 AM  
This must be a metaphor. It was the bus used for the acid test but now it is more duck dynasty.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Unobtanium [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-08 6:01:26 AM  

mjjt: 3 bed on 2 acres for $125,000

What is it, next to chem factory?


It's next to an Interstate Highway:
3516 Interstate Highway 20 W, Baird, TX 79504
 
Hey Nurse! [OhFark]
2023-03-08 6:38:20 AM  

KarmicDisaster: What's the deal with no toilet paper in the toilets and "outdoor portable bathrooms ". Sounds like they have a severe septic problem, not everyone wants to deal with that.


Or the space heaters, or the wood rot, or the hidden mold (lots of water damage), or the completely disgusting kitchen, or the junk in the yard, or the freaking junked school bus. This place is a dump. Wouldn't take it for free.
 
FarkaDark
2023-03-08 6:46:55 AM  

Lunakki: roofmonkey: Every woman I've ever dated and/or met from Texas was:

1. Hot
2. Smart, but not really smart
3. The best kind of slutty
4. Batshiat crazy, in the "questionable judgement" part of the hot/crazy plot.

/descended from Texans
//Californian for life
//fark y'all in your confederate arses

Hey, I'm a woman who was born in Texas, and only three things on that list apply to me!


media.tenor.comView Full Size
 
cwheelie
2023-03-08 8:10:36 AM  
I lived in Abilene for 3 years. It's even worse than you imagine
 
KarmicDisaster [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-03-08 8:14:43 AM  

cwheelie: I lived in Abilene for 3 years. It's even worse than you imagine


and that's just the smell.
 
Incog_Neeto
2023-03-08 8:45:32 AM  
Client:  I need a place to stash my kidnap victims

Realtor :  Have I got the place for you!
 
freakymescan
2023-03-08 8:46:38 AM  
I want to say that I've been to that haunted house before, but it was really out of the way, there was nothing around it, and I was happy to have the whole experience over with.
 
waxbeans [TotalFark]
2023-03-08 8:52:04 AM  
I'm only buying if it comes with everything in the pictures
 
Someone Else's Alt [TotalFark]
2023-03-08 9:15:35 AM  
Run down piece of shiat with bars on the windows in the middle of nowhere Texas and has a rape dungeon.


Yesh.
 
geekbikerskum
2023-03-08 9:16:03 AM  

Cheron: This must be a metaphor. It was the bus used for the acid test but now it is more duck dynasty.

[Fark user image 850x637]


Come on. Get happy.
 
TwilightZone
2023-03-08 10:18:06 AM  
Scariest thing in the place was the high school lockers.
 
Chuck Wagon
2023-03-08 11:06:24 AM  

Hey Nurse!: KarmicDisaster: What's the deal with no toilet paper in the toilets and "outdoor portable bathrooms ". Sounds like they have a severe septic problem, not everyone wants to deal with that.

Or the space heaters, or the wood rot, or the hidden mold (lots of water damage), or the completely disgusting kitchen, or the junk in the yard, or the freaking junked school bus. This place is a dump. Wouldn't take it for free.


Looks like it needs a new roof too.
 
Smelly Pirate Hooker
2023-03-08 11:13:26 AM  
I mean ... LOL, that's amazing. I salute the seller/real estate people.
 
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