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(WSAZ West Virginia)   First it shakes the poo lose and then you get your O face   (wsaz.com) divider line
78
    More: Repeat, Large intestine, Defecation, Small intestine, Stomach, Pharmaceutical drug, Gastrointestinal tract, Ingestion, hours of ingesting  
•       •       •

5021 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Feb 2023 at 8:35 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



78 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
RogueWallEnthusiast [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-09 8:36:22 AM  
Rectix - SNL
Youtube O2FkgBIL-kI
 
ifky
2023-02-09 8:40:56 AM  
If you would just eat one bowl of colon blow you would be fine.

worleygig.comView Full Size
 
wetrat
2023-02-09 8:41:00 AM  
"After 14 hours of ingesting, the pill reaches the large intestine and gets to work."

A large cup of black coffee is a lot faster and doesn't cost $69 a month.
 
Clash City Farker
2023-02-09 8:41:14 AM  
If you want to go poop, drink more water.
 
FarkaDark
2023-02-09 8:41:29 AM  
I'm still traumatized from that one time the vibrations chipped my teeth.
 
puckrock2000
2023-02-09 8:41:42 AM  
Vibrant is not currently covered by health insurance, but the company is offering a coupon to cap out-of-pocket costs at $69 per month.

Nice.

/butt stuff
 
talkertopc [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:44:10 AM  
How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?
 
Petey4335
2023-02-09 8:46:18 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Hoblit [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:46:51 AM  
Watza' pool-lose anyway?
 
Eightballjacket [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:46:58 AM  
media.tenor.comView Full Size
 
oldfarthenry [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:47:43 AM  
M-M-Man - I h-h-had a b-b-b-breakthru offloading this m-m-morning, I t-tell y-y-ya!
 
ObscureNameHere
2023-02-09 8:48:11 AM  

Petey4335: [Fark user image image 220x220]


[Well That's Enough Internet for Today.jpg]
 
Hoblit [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:48:53 AM  

Hoblit: Watza' pool-lose anyway?


Well, the lesson here is that if you're going to make fun of someone else's spelling, you should probably check you're own.
 
Sentient
2023-02-09 8:49:32 AM  
As someone who tries to reduce single-use plastic bags, recycle my metals etc., I can't help but wonder if we should be eating small battery-powered mechanical devices daily that just get pooped directly into the waste system.
 
hoyt clagwell [OhFark]
2023-02-09 8:49:32 AM  
Interesting.  Of course, this is coming from a physician who didn't know that constipation was a medical problem until his first day as an intern.  Quickly learned to add prophylactic laxatives to my order sets

/Only had to deal with that for a year
//Happily my (professional) life no longer involves pooping
///Leave my private life outta this!
 
Hoblit [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:49:41 AM  
So you have to wait until you get your O face, to have enough O's for the whole word "loose"?
 
aimtastic [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:50:04 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


Moth larva?
 
Loris [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-09 8:51:25 AM  
When I was in high school, a bunch of us rode to school in Chuck's car. He had a rather large subwoofer in the back of the car. There were many farts on the way to school.
 
benelane
2023-02-09 8:57:56 AM  
I think I saw a remote controlled version on chaturfriend or something. It was quite a perverted site with live, free and naked women, so of course I never went back.
 
Mrs. Snipes [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 8:58:12 AM  
Go to your local drug store and find the candy section. Look for the sugar free version of your favorite candy, like chocolate-covered toffee or peanut butter cups. Whatever it says the serving size is, start with that. Also, while you're at the drug store, get some soft, friendly toilet paper and maybe even some soothing wipes.

Cancel any plans for the rest of the day.

Give it an hour or 2. You might need to 1.5 times the serving or 2X the serving but you'll be shiatting a lot sooner than 14 hours.

Afterwards, apologize profusely to your butthole.
 
blatz514 [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-09 9:00:43 AM  
A 12 pack of Blatz will do the trick.
 
UncleDirtNap
2023-02-09 9:03:48 AM  
"Poooooooop coming out!"

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
kbronsito
2023-02-09 9:05:46 AM  
Just download the Chipotle loyalty app.
 
Badmoodman [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 9:05:54 AM  
First it shakes the poo lose and then you get your O face

Cool, then you can add your 'O' in 'lose.'
 
EBN-OZN
2023-02-09 9:10:10 AM  
Two words: Taco Bell.
 
BitwiseShift
2023-02-09 9:12:50 AM  

UncleDirtNap: "Poooooooop coming out!"

Fark user imageView Full Size



Early adopter.   Used it for dating as a suppository in as many places as could fit.
 
New Rising Sun
2023-02-09 9:14:04 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


Seems like it:  https://www.vibrantgastro.com/wp-content/uploads/ifu.pdf
And their latest patent is US11504024

An excerpt:

Fark user imageView Full Size


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
eagles95
2023-02-09 9:14:18 AM  

EBN-OZN: Two words: Taco Bell.


Thank you. A crunchwrap and bean burrito and you are back to normal in under 15 minutes.
 
jso2897
2023-02-09 9:16:48 AM  
This development conjures scenarios.
 
Marcos P
2023-02-09 9:22:58 AM  
Haha what come on
 
Wine Sipping Elitist [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 9:26:44 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


From the article:
The capsule is meant to be taken every day

Since they use the singular form of capsule, I think you're supposed to fish iat out of the toilet and swallow it again.
 
MythDragon
2023-02-09 9:27:15 AM  

Mrs. Snipes: Go to your local drug store and find the candy section. Look for the sugar free version of your favorite candy, like chocolate-covered toffee or peanut butter cups. Whatever it says the serving size is, start with that. Also, while you're at the drug store, get some soft, friendly toilet paper and maybe even some soothing wipes.

Cancel any plans for the rest of the day.

Give it an hour or 2. You might need to 1.5 times the serving or 2X the serving but you'll be shiatting a lot sooner than 14 hours.

Afterwards, apologize profusely to your butthole.


i.insider.comView Full Size
 
EBN-OZN
2023-02-09 9:32:41 AM  

MythDragon: Mrs. Snipes: Go to your local drug store and find the candy section. Look for the sugar free version of your favorite candy, like chocolate-covered toffee or peanut butter cups. Whatever it says the serving size is, start with that. Also, while you're at the drug store, get some soft, friendly toilet paper and maybe even some soothing wipes.

Cancel any plans for the rest of the day.

Give it an hour or 2. You might need to 1.5 times the serving or 2X the serving but you'll be shiatting a lot sooner than 14 hours.

Afterwards, apologize profusely to your butthole.

[i.insider.com image 750x657]


This method works, too. (NSFW)

https://www.craigslist.org/about/best/lax/182862349.html
 
sinko swimo
2023-02-09 9:34:08 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


ever feel your cell phone vibrate? hmmm? same thing. neither one is safe for the environment. mankind is a destroyer of itself. but seriously, everything in medicine has a side effect. band-aids = sticky hurts when you pull it off. x-ray = you're exposed to x-rays. it's just the nature of the way things work.
 
AnotherDeadBard [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 9:34:23 AM  

Clash City Farker: If you want to go poop, drink more water.


You mean like ... out of the toilet?
 
MythDragon
2023-02-09 9:38:10 AM  
There is an easier and cheaper way to do this. You know those boresnake cleaners for rifles?
media-amazon.comView Full Size

Get a couple of those and tie them together.   Swallow one end and let it work its way down and through while keeping the other end out of your mouth.  Once the tip arrives out the other side, you can just pull the whole thing through.

But if you want maximum efficiency, tie the newly appeared tip to the loop hanging out of your mouth, and now you have a never ending chain that's always ready to go.  You can just give a little pull when you need a little loosening.

Kinda like those old fashioned never ending cloth towel hand driers that used to be in gas station bathrooms.
 
Prof. Frink [BareFark]
2023-02-09 9:38:14 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


Might help clear drain-clogs on the way down.
 
MythDragon
2023-02-09 9:40:30 AM  

EBN-OZN: MythDragon: Mrs. Snipes: Go to your local drug store and find the candy section. Look for the sugar free version of your favorite candy, like chocolate-covered toffee or peanut butter cups. Whatever it says the serving size is, start with that. Also, while you're at the drug store, get some soft, friendly toilet paper and maybe even some soothing wipes.

Cancel any plans for the rest of the day.

Give it an hour or 2. You might need to 1.5 times the serving or 2X the serving but you'll be shiatting a lot sooner than 14 hours.

Afterwards, apologize profusely to your butthole.

[i.insider.com image 750x657]

This method works, too. (NSFW)

https://www.craigslist.org/about/best/lax/182862349.html


Best review ever. I remember those farking chips. How did manufactures think people would be okay with that shiat?
 
brap [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 9:41:19 AM  
The vibrating constipation medication is being marketed in Adult Toy shops as Butt UN-Plugs.
 
Wine Sipping Elitist [TotalFark]
2023-02-09 9:41:33 AM  
This seems like the cheapest solution

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Vtimlin
2023-02-09 9:46:09 AM  

talkertopc: How does it work? Is there a tiny motor in there with a battery? What happen once it leaves the body and enter the sewer system? Is it safe for the environment?


Reuseable
 
yakmans_dad
2023-02-09 9:46:28 AM  

Hoblit: Watza' pool-lose anyway?


self-respect
 
eldoobie
2023-02-09 9:46:55 AM  

Hoblit: Watza' pool-lose anyway?


/pet peve
 
beyondmycontrol
2023-02-09 9:48:20 AM  

Hoblit: Hoblit: Watza' pool-lose anyway?

Well, the lesson here is that if you're going to make fun of someone else's spelling, you should probably check you're your own.
 
Snazzy1
2023-02-09 9:49:09 AM  

blatz514: A 12 pack of Blatz will do the trick.


I mean is there anything a 12 pack of Blatz can't do??
 
natazha [BareFark]
2023-02-09 9:50:30 AM  

wetrat: "After 14 hours of ingesting, the pill reaches the large intestine and gets to work."

A large cup of black coffee is a lot faster and doesn't cost $69 a month.


That only works for about 30% of people.
 
Wessoman
2023-02-09 9:52:05 AM  

Wine Sipping Elitist: This seems like the cheapest solution

[Fark user image image 165x160]


Yep. You don't want to go any cheaper than that:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Marcos P
2023-02-09 9:55:49 AM  
A coffee and a marlboro used to get me going, I called it a Texas Enema. I dont smoke any more
 
thealgorerhythm
2023-02-09 9:56:39 AM  
Or you could eat more vegetables
 
thealgorerhythm
2023-02-09 9:58:16 AM  

Snazzy1: blatz514: A 12 pack of Blatz will do the trick.

I mean is there anything a 12 pack of Blatz can't do??


Nobody at the bar got any sexier. You just lost all discernment and self respect.
 
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