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(CNN)   Have you eaten any food recently? Congrats, you have listeria   (cnn.com) divider line
84
    More: Sick, Disease, Food and Drug Administration, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Foodborne illness, Infection, Listeriosis, Brand, Diarrhea  
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5253 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Feb 2023 at 5:20 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



84 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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Dr.Fey [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 3:50:00 PM  
FTA:  The recalled foods were distributed in Connecticut, the District of Columbia,Maryland, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, South Carolina and Virginia, according to the FDA.

I'm on Maui and have been for the last two weeks.  Pretty sure Mama's Fish House is safe.

/obvious humblebrag is obvious
 
xanadian [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 4:29:05 PM  
I have a whole bottle of Cool Mint Listeria by the bathroom sink.  I rinse with it every night.
 
plecos [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 5:16:53 PM  
I think there's this show where the food got contaminated all over the world and a lot of people got sick...obviously fiction.  Check HBO Max for local listing in your area.
 
Be polite walk on the right
2023-02-06 5:20:38 PM  
Yes but my Listeria took mushrooms and cocaine first
 
DuneClimber
2023-02-06 5:21:04 PM  
A little listeria never hurt anyone.
 
Nintenfreak [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:22:38 PM  
Don't be listerical Subby
 
born_yesterday [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:26:15 PM  
The recall by Fresh Ideation Food Group LLC includes ready-to-eat sandwiches, salads....

Smart move, you sonsabiatches
 
functionisalwaystaken
2023-02-06 5:26:20 PM  
Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.
 
wxboy
2023-02-06 5:28:20 PM  
I don't really know for sure, but a lot of these seem like the kinds of things you might buy at a gas station or 7-11 when you're in a rush, or the overpriced premade food at an airport, wrapped up in saran wrap with a label slapped on it.

If you're eating cold food from places like that, it's more of a surprise when you don't get sick.
 
ISO15693
2023-02-06 5:28:21 PM  
Not the best Def Leppard album, but still decent.
 
WTP 2
2023-02-06 5:28:54 PM  
just another reason i have hostess cupcakes FOR breakfast, and the wife hates that i do that.
but this is another +1 for my diet of cupcakes and sugar stuff.
 
mistahtom
2023-02-06 5:29:45 PM  
Don't eat processed foods....
 
BunchaRubes
2023-02-06 5:30:13 PM  
I have leftover homemade pizza for breakfast and just had some mac and cheese for lunchdinner.  And I'm like 900 mile sfrom any of those places.
 
BunchaRubes
2023-02-06 5:32:05 PM  

wxboy: I don't really know for sure, but a lot of these seem like the kinds of things you might buy at a gas station or 7-11 when you're in a rush, or the overpriced premade food at an airport, wrapped up in saran wrap with a label slapped on it.

If you're eating cold food from places like that, it's more of a surprise when you don't get sick.


That's exactly what they are.

https://www.fda.gov/safety/recalls-market-withdrawals-safety-alerts/fresh-ideation-food-group-llc-recalls-sandwiches-and-other-products-because-possible-health-risk#recall-announcement
 
The Weekend Baker
2023-02-06 5:32:16 PM  
It's most likely to sicken pregnant women and their newborns, adults aged 65 or older, and people with weakened immune systems, according to the CDC.

Hmmm, I'm sure there aren't any people like that around after three years of pandemic.  Nope.
 
invictus2 [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:32:24 PM  

WTP 2: just another reason i have hostess cupcakes FOR breakfast, and the wife hates that i do that.
but this is another +1 for my diet of cupcakes and sugar stuff.


pussy!, Grab a bottle of the morning dew

A.M. Ale Ad - Saturday Night Live
Youtube _fLtEVc3jTU
 
Dahnkster [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:32:26 PM  
This is the dawning of the Age of Listeria.
/The Age of Listeria, The Age of Listeria.
//Listeria...
///Listeria!

Fark user imageView Full Size


My lawn... Dig it.
 
p89tech
2023-02-06 5:32:30 PM  
Have you.... ?

Yep, you're gonna' die.

Sure, like I was gonna' live forever before I did that thing.

Whatever, I'm still gonna' keep stepping off curbs without looking both ways. It beats living to be as old as my father.
 
anuran
2023-02-06 5:34:45 PM  

functionisalwaystaken: Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.


The last time I had listeria it was courtesy of a well established pizza place
 
MillionDollarMo
2023-02-06 5:34:46 PM  
It's much better to catch listeria as quickly as possible to build up immunity.
 
Spego
2023-02-06 5:36:06 PM  
Hysteria (Remastered 2017)
Youtube XJBrrOarTfs
 
tintar [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:36:08 PM  
Fresh Ideation Food Group ???

eh, prolly unrelated.
 
Walker [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:36:41 PM  
I like to look at it as listeria has me! Suck it listeria!
 
anuran
2023-02-06 5:36:55 PM  

functionisalwaystaken: Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.


... and my last serious food poisoning was from an expensive supermarket. Still can't be around pickled herring fifteen years later. Price is no guarantee
 
Tarl3k
2023-02-06 5:38:32 PM  
Again, stop eating ready-to-eat food.  It's the highest risk of foodbourne illness...
 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 5:40:50 PM  

wxboy: I don't really know for sure, but a lot of these seem like the kinds of things you might buy at a gas station or 7-11 when you're in a rush, or the overpriced premade food at an airport, wrapped up in saran wrap with a label slapped on it.

If you're eating cold food from places like that, it's more of a surprise when you don't get sick.


If you're eating HOT food from places like that, you're pretty much guaranteed death.
 
Hickory-smoked
2023-02-06 5:41:40 PM  
I expect to see MAGAs stuffing themselves with gas-station turkey subs to trigger Fauci.
 
Senseless_drivel
2023-02-06 5:42:42 PM  

ISO15693: Not the best Def Leppard album, but still decent.


I got to know tonight
What you ate last night
Can't stop this feeling
Can't stop this fire

[Chorus]
Oh, I get hysterical, listeria, oh, can you feel it, do you believe it?
It's such a magical mysteria
When you get that feeling better start believing
Because it's a miracle, oh, say you will, ooh babe
Listeria blows out your rear
 
Subtonic
2023-02-06 5:49:26 PM  
Shiat, that Wawa sub in the fridge was dinner.

...

Meh, fark it.
 
jman144
2023-02-06 5:51:02 PM  
Listeria? I've never even used mouthwash!
 
pastramithemosterotic
2023-02-06 5:52:16 PM  

invictus2: WTP 2: just another reason i have hostess cupcakes FOR breakfast, and the wife hates that i do that.
but this is another +1 for my diet of cupcakes and sugar stuff.

pussy!, Grab a bottle of the morning dew

[YouTube video: A.M. Ale Ad - Saturday Night Live]


A young David Koechner. Huh
 
LarryDan43
2023-02-06 5:55:25 PM  

xanadian: I have a whole bottle of Cool Mint Listeria by the bathroom sink.  I rinse with it every night.


That's how you get natural immunity
 
Godscrack
2023-02-06 5:56:22 PM  
Nope. Don't buy commercial pre made food.
 
DOCTORD000M
2023-02-06 5:58:47 PM  
All The Food is Poison | Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! | Adult Swim
Youtube _Re6pZri8Gw
 
Day_Old_Dutchie
2023-02-06 6:01:37 PM  

Tarl3k: Again, stop eating ready-to-eat food.  It's the highest risk of foodbourne illness...


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Arkanaut
2023-02-06 6:03:50 PM  
Thanks for your concern, subby, but I cook my food.
 
Arkanaut
2023-02-06 6:06:36 PM  

Subtonic: Shiat, that Wawa sub in the fridge was dinner.

...

Meh, fark it.


Futurama - Once again, the conservative sandwich heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!
Youtube kId0WiD69JM
 
fragMasterFlash [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 6:11:29 PM  
Well if that burrito I just munched kills me at least I can enjoy the yummy aftertaste as I perish.
 
Madman drummers bummers [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 6:12:45 PM  

born_yesterday: The recall by Fresh Ideation Food Group LLC includes ready-to-eat sandwiches, salads....

Smart move, you sonsabiatches


That company name tells me that they've done this before, probably several times: reorganize and rename to avoid lawsuits.

But when I do that, it's "avoiding consequences" and "obstruction of justice."
 
kbronsito
2023-02-06 6:16:36 PM  

xanadian: I have a whole bottle of Cool Mint Listeria by the bathroom sink.  I rinse with it every night.


You gotta mainline it to get the covid protection.
 
Tarl3k
2023-02-06 6:23:34 PM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: Tarl3k: Again, stop eating ready-to-eat food.  It's the highest risk of foodbourne illness...

[Fark user image 425x318]


That IS a good way to get super strength and intelligence. ;)
 
darinwil
2023-02-06 6:24:02 PM  

kbronsito: xanadian: I have a whole bottle of Cool Mint Listeria by the bathroom sink.  I rinse with it every night.

You gotta mainline it to get the covid protection.


The egg salad is loaded in the rig, here we go!

/Oooh cool mint
//Little late for that, I think this is bad
///The eggs feel soo beautiful
 
capt.snicklefritz [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 6:27:15 PM  

Dr.Fey: FTA:  The recalled foods were distributed in Connecticut, the District of Columbia,Maryland, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, South Carolina and Virginia, according to the FDA.

I'm on Maui and have been for the last two weeks.  Pretty sure Mama's Fish House is safe.

/obvious humblebrag is obvious


We honeymooned on Maui and had a dinner there.

What I'm trying to say is that I'm jealous.
 
DarksideHalo
2023-02-06 6:31:25 PM  

anuran: functionisalwaystaken: Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.

... and my last serious food poisoning was from an expensive supermarket. Still can't be around pickled herring fifteen years later. Price is no guarantee


pickled herring
Well there's your problem.
Not even once.
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist
2023-02-06 6:51:56 PM  

functionisalwaystaken: Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.


I hope the breakable comb I recently used was safe. At least I don't have to worry about it infecting me any more because it broke.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Short Victoria's War
2023-02-06 6:56:20 PM  
they're just sleepin'

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Tom Marvolo Bombadil
2023-02-06 6:58:22 PM  

Tarl3k: Again, stop eating ready-to-eat food.  It's the highest risk of foodbourne illness...


So we should eat food that isn't ready to eat?  That seems counter-intuitive, but hey, whatever the science says!  Guess I don't need to cook this chicken after all...
 
bigdog1960
2023-02-06 6:59:09 PM  
Luckily am only 62 and not pregnant and eat little processed food.
 
Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist
2023-02-06 7:04:15 PM  

Tom Marvolo Bombadil: Tarl3k: Again, stop eating ready-to-eat food.  It's the highest risk of foodbourne illness...

So we should eat food that isn't ready to eat?  That seems counter-intuitive, but hey, whatever the science says!  Guess I don't need to cook this chicken after all...


Have you ever been sick after eating Goldberry's raw tuna?
 
anuran
2023-02-06 7:13:03 PM  

DarksideHalo: anuran: functionisalwaystaken: Haven't eaten any gas station food that wasn't a frozen coke, I think I'm good.

... and my last serious food poisoning was from an expensive supermarket. Still can't be around pickled herring fifteen years later. Price is no guarantee

pickled herring
Well there's your problem.
Not even once.
[i.pinimg.com image 400x400]


Definitely never again. 5' projectile vomiting is Nature's way of telling you "Don't put that in your body."
 
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