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(Zillow)   Perfect property for investors Lots of potential, being sold "AS IS"   (zillow.com) divider line
179
    More: Fail, Total structure area, Total interior livable area, supported browser, Mobile Apps, Perfect property, Perimeter, Volume, Length  
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8133 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Feb 2023 at 12:05 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



179 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Newest | Show all

 
Willie_One_Eye [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 11:56:06 AM  
Potential as landfill.
 
Ethertap [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 11:58:13 AM  
Eh, around here that would count as "furnished"
 
NewportBarGuy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:05:34 PM  
That thing doesn't even have potential for a crack den.
 
DoBeDoBeDo [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:07:01 PM  
The exposed beams are very industrial......so hot right now!
 
EBN-OZN
2023-02-06 12:07:32 PM  
I like the gas can in #14. Power of suggestion?
 
damndirtyape
2023-02-06 12:07:44 PM  
Omahahaha, no.

i'll see myself out.
 
DecemberNitro
2023-02-06 12:07:45 PM  
You'd be safer living in a tent year round.
 
pounddawg
2023-02-06 12:08:07 PM  
Perfect property for investors! - unlivable, toxic, needs clean up.

Lots of potential -- can't get any worse

being sold "AS IS". -- take it or leave it.
 
SpectroBoy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:08:27 PM  
Now I need a tetanus shot just from looking at the pictures.
 
wxboy
2023-02-06 12:08:44 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
austerity101
2023-02-06 12:08:46 PM  
Just needs a little bit of beige paint and you can charge 2 grabs a month for it.
 
Rev.K [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:09:11 PM  
Why did the selling realtor even bother with interior pictures?
 
austerity101
2023-02-06 12:09:15 PM  
Lol, 2 *grand.

/my phone is being frisky this morning.
 
iamskibibitz
2023-02-06 12:09:18 PM  
The fact that the bothered to take as many pictures of that place as they did is pretty wild.
 
houstondragon
2023-02-06 12:09:38 PM  

Ethertap: Eh, around here that would count as "furnished"


No haggling, they know what they got ;P
 
fiddlehead
2023-02-06 12:09:56 PM  
I wonder how often real estate agents are all "Wow, my shiat property is BLOWING UP views on Zillow that's AMAZING...oh never mind, it's all non-buyer traffic from that Zillow mockery site."
 
cleek
2023-02-06 12:10:36 PM  
realtor didn't even try for a digital remodel?
 
SpectroBoy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:10:51 PM  
More like ass is, amirite?
 
Literally Addicted [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:11:14 PM  
fixer upper
 
AlphaG33k
2023-02-06 12:12:44 PM  
Always interesting to see how the middle class in the greatest country in the world lives.
 
CheatCommando [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:12:57 PM  

iamskibibitz: The fact that the bothered to take as many pictures of that place as they did is pretty wild.


Maybe they got them from the coroner after the previous owner was transported.
 
doctorguilty
2023-02-06 12:13:13 PM  

iamskibibitz: The fact that the bothered to take as many pictures of that place as they did is pretty wild.


Seriously. The house is a total loss, how about pictures of the neighborhood instead?
 
theteacher [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:13:22 PM  
July 22
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
born_yesterday [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:13:37 PM  

NewportBarGuy: That thing doesn't even have potential for a crack den.


I was going to chide you as being too finicky to ever make it as a crack dealer but I checked it out and you called it.

Maybe a crack AirB&B.
 
theteacher [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:14:26 PM  

doctorguilty: iamskibibitz: The fact that the bothered to take as many pictures of that place as they did is pretty wild.

Seriously. The house is a total loss, how about pictures of the neighborhood instead?


The lot is pretty big.
 
batrachoseps
2023-02-06 12:15:03 PM  
Zillow says the rental value is $1250/mo. This place will pay for itself in a little over 2 years!
 
Somaticasual [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:15:25 PM  
I feel that hanging gasoline jug might come in handy,
although law enforcement may have different opinions...
 
Spindle
2023-02-06 12:15:31 PM  
The interior pictures showed the assorted stuff laying around to be, dare I say, clean.  Meaning someone lived there and took care of their stuff while the house rotted around them.  Kind of a toss up of guesses between person of extreme advanced age and/or severe mental illness
 
starlost
2023-02-06 12:15:51 PM  
Laugh all you want but i happen to know he has a schoolbus down by the river. A SCHOOLBUS. This is just the place he shared with his mother when social security was due.
 
youre killing independent george
2023-02-06 12:15:53 PM  
TWENTY-SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLARS?

Jesus.

Not even for twenty-seven hundred.. That house barely comes with enough land for it to fit on: 0.05 acre, by the math.
 
LarryDan43
2023-02-06 12:18:04 PM  
That's a trap house
 
Begoggle
2023-02-06 12:18:12 PM  
Cities need to condemn more houses.
Condemn it, reclaim the property, clear the house completely and make an empty lot.
 
Markoff_Cheney [recently expired TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:18:37 PM  
Wow, that must be a worthless lot of land as well.
 
Bear OmNomNom
2023-02-06 12:19:19 PM  
There wasn't a lot of calculation involved in the sale price. The previous occupants already did the meth!
 
nytmare
2023-02-06 12:20:13 PM  
Someone stole the aluminum siding for scrap? Now the exterior walls are made of swiss cheese. And bees. And fleas.
 
arrogantbastich [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:20:16 PM  
I don't want to imagine the people who lived in that.
 
thisPuffin
2023-02-06 12:20:22 PM  
These Zillow posts in recent days are not Fark.com quality.  These are cheap posts that aren't news or entertainment.
 
TommyDeuce [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:20:33 PM  
Realtor (slaps porch) This baby will hold so much crack!
 
Crocoduck
2023-02-06 12:20:49 PM  
The next episode of The Last of Us may very well be in Omaha....
 
Erma Gerdd
2023-02-06 12:20:53 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

/an attempt was made
 
darth sunshine
2023-02-06 12:21:17 PM  
hey!  Central air!
 
kb7rky
2023-02-06 12:21:24 PM  
They'd have to pay *me* to take it.
 
Snarcoleptic_Hoosier
2023-02-06 12:21:59 PM  
If you had the money to demolish the house, it may not be a bad piece of land. A zoomed out Google maps view shows several of the roads in that neighborhood run right into the financial district.
 
Schmerd1948 [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:21:59 PM  
I love the honesty of the listing. They even depict Nebraska weather in the winter. I guess none of the spring pictures came out.
 
MusicMakeMyHeadPound [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-06 12:22:01 PM  

youre killing independent george: TWENTY-SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLARS?

Jesus.

Not even for twenty-seven hundred.. That house barely comes with enough land for it to fit on: 0.05 acre, by the math.


$12.39/sq. ft.  of land.

If it weren't for demolition costs that would be fairly cheap. I think. I'm calibrated to New York, not Nebraska.

Of course, the problem is that $27,000 is well below the minimum amount for a mortgage, so you'll need to pay that in cash. Might not be a terrible buy if you're a developer.
 
MarciusDecimus
2023-02-06 12:23:33 PM  

EBN-OZN: I like the gas can in #14. Power of suggestion?


I like the "central air".

Riiiight.
 
CheatCommando [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:23:40 PM  

Spindle: The interior pictures showed the assorted stuff laying around to be, dare I say, clean.  Meaning someone lived there and took care of their stuff while the house rotted around them.  Kind of a toss up of guesses between person of extreme advanced age and/or severe mental illness


From looking at the broader map data, this is the bad part of town. It gets a lower crime grade than my neighborhood is SE Washington DC.
 
DannyBrandt [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:24:15 PM  
Does it have gas stoves, or electric?
 
Smelly Pirate Hooker
2023-02-06 12:25:27 PM  
I'd say that price is $25K too high.
 
brap [TotalFark]
2023-02-06 12:26:27 PM  
That's a typo; the property is actually being not-sold "AS IF" by the get-real estate firm of Valley Girl and Associates L.L.P.
 
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