"We can't afford an online media marketing push - please, for the love of all that's tawdry & trite, get engaged at a goddamned Cracker Barrel and upload pictures! C'mon! And, to show you that we don't mean business at all, we're gonna turn it into a goddamned contest! Only five of you couples get a chance to 'win' this shiat!"

Man, read the contest rules & regulations. It's friggin' hilarious.

Imagine giving a company an irrevocable license to use your engagement video forever, anywhere and everywhere. Oh, and everything about both of you - "any and all names, identities, titles, likenesses, distinctive appearances, physical likenesses, images, portraits, pictures, photographs (whether still or moving), screen personas, voices, vocal styles, statements, gestures, mannerisms, personalities, performance characteristics, biographical data, signatures, and any other indicia or imitations of identity or likeness listed, provided, referenced, or otherwise contained in the Entry (all attributes, collectively, per person, a "Persona"), including the Video, for purposes of advertising and trade, in any format, medium, or technology now known or later developed without further notice, approval, or compensation, unless prohibited by law" - for free, forever and ever.

All that for $2,000 per person, doled out to you over the course of a year as multiple Cracker Barrel Old Country Store gift cards (can't have you spending it all at once, you crazy, gluttonous kids!)

Seriously, a national chain spends $10,000 and in return hundreds of couples push videos onto Instagram advertising Cracker Barrel, all of which the company can now farm to their heart's content. On a per-video basis, they're likely gonna spend less than a hundred bucks, and in return get all the "personas" they can mine & map onto AI deepfakes. You'll be one of Cracker Barrel's faces, forever, and they can do anything that they like with you, or to you, and you can't do a damned thing about it because you signed away your rights in return for... up to $35 a week in free food.

Farking morons.

*$2,000 per couple - not even per person.

pastramithemosterotic: Pocket Ninja: Free food for a year from Cracker Barrel is a threat, not an offer.

You won't live the year if you eat there every day

Thankfully, the contest saves you from yourself - you're only given up to $35 a week, or as the rules state it, enough to "provide one (1) meal or entrée for two (2) people per week ($35 average per visit per couple) over the course of 52 weeks."