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(Yahoo)   Hollywood to remake Seven Samurai   ( divider line
    More: Stupid  
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3289 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Mar 2002 at 2:21 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

77 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-03-02 02:23:17 PM  
2002-03-02 02:24:31 PM  
Jesus farking Potatoes. Why? Tishiro Mifune should climb out of his grave and stab Weinstein in his stupid bald fat ass.
2002-03-02 02:26:06 PM  
"Remake" as in "make a complete bollocks of".
2002-03-02 02:26:35 PM  
wasn't there a recent remake of this with Antonio banderas?
2002-03-02 02:27:13 PM  
Probably gonna make some Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon type film out of it. The Magnificent Seven did the concept justice - leave it the fark alone!
2002-03-02 02:27:15 PM  
Hollywood always farks over good movies...
2002-03-02 02:27:30 PM  
This has already been remade by Hollywood
2002-03-02 02:28:26 PM  
This is not happening this is not happening oh please god say it aint so. I love that film
2002-03-02 02:28:50 PM  
i'd like to see hollywood make a movie that isn't a remake... and isn't crappy too.
2002-03-02 02:31:14 PM  
I was gonna say, didn't Magnificent Seven do this?

Jesus Christ, Hollywood, is it any wonder why Independent Cinema is gaining more and more of a following?
2002-03-02 02:33:13 PM  
Been there, done that -- it's known as THe Magnificent Seven.

And it was made in....

(Wait for it)

1960. *yawn*
2002-03-02 02:34:26 PM  
Not enough "diversity" on the original cast for Hollywood Lib'-ruls.
2002-03-02 02:35:00 PM  
I have no doubt that a remake of Citizen Kane is just around the corner.
Hollywood has oficially run out of original ideas.
2002-03-02 02:35:52 PM  
Can't they just stick to cartoons and 70 shows.
2002-03-02 02:36:56 PM  
Not only did the Magificent Seven do this, but so did Battle Beyond the Stars, A Bug's Life, and Hawk the Slayer.
2002-03-02 02:37:08 PM  
No it will be the Citizen Caine Mutiny!
Murder two movies in one shot.
2002-03-02 02:38:03 PM  
Been remade as a western (Magnificent Seven, as many of you have already pointed out), a sci-fi movie (Battle Beyond the Stars) and to a certain extent, a kid flick (A Bug's Life) we really need another interpretation?
2002-03-02 02:39:45 PM  
There's nothing to remake about Citizen Kane. It has no audience today. Seven Samurai has fighting, although that wasn't the main content of the original, fighting has a market. Citizen Kane is people talking about a dead guy. No place for that today. Maybe if Kane fought off a band of ninja warriors.... Hey my phone is ringing...
2002-03-02 02:40:05 PM  
Why can't hollywood just stick to making bad movies about 70's cartoons?

Why can't they leave the good movies alone. Is hollywood on some psychotic destructive mission to make all films SUCK?
2002-03-02 02:41:06 PM  
Citizen Caine Mutiny on the Bounty
2002-03-02 02:41:58 PM  
No, One_of_Us, we don't, but Weinstein is GREEDY and can never have enough cash.

Gee, I wonder if this is going to be in English? Probably w/a "diverse" cast.
2002-03-02 02:44:58 PM  
Akiro Kurosawa will haunt these people to the grave. I'm betting this movie has ninjas. LOTS of ninjas. Because ninjas are from Japan and are cool and belong in a movie with samurai so they can go down to the bar and get drunk with each other and blah blah blah blah /scriptwriter.

*Rocks back and forth crying*
2002-03-02 02:49:51 PM  
Citizen Kane is people talking about a dead guy. No place for that today.

There's plenty of room for dead people in Hollywood films... especially when they're the undead!

Night of the Living Citizen Kane!
2002-03-02 02:54:10 PM  
My choices for the cast of Seven Samurai 2000:

Lead Samurai - Sean ConneryWanna-be Samurai - Chris TuckerStep-n-Fetch-It Villager - Steve BuscemiFat-Buddy Samurai - Sean AstinHe-So-Crazy Samurai - Donald Gibb ("Ogre" from Revenge of the Nerds)Sword-Master Samurai - Christopher WalkenTouchy-Feely Samurai - Kevin Spacey

And introducing the all-new for 2000 8th 7th Samurai:

"Girl-Power" Samurai - Sarah Michelle Gellar
2002-03-02 02:55:04 PM  
2002-03-02 03:00:55 PM  
It's going to suck because it's going to be a star vehicle for some has-been trying make it back to Hollywood.
It's going to suck because it's going to be a star vehicle for some young star trying get to the "next pay scale".
It's going to suck because it's going have more unlikely explosions then ever with more CG!
2002-03-02 03:02:30 PM  
Wasn't Star Wars also a remake of this?
2002-03-02 03:02:52 PM  
Or you could just take the cast of "Armageddon" and put them to work on the remake... and make sure there's that "All-Samurai-walk-towards-camera scene in slow-motion," a la Jerry Bruckheimer.
2002-03-02 03:03:07 PM  
As has been stated by many already in this thread.
This movie is great.
[image from too old to be available]
2002-03-02 03:03:50 PM  
I dunno anything about this new one, but the old one was teh rox!
2002-03-02 03:04:50 PM  
FARK MGM!! Rollerball, Foxy Brown, Walking Tall, and now this....

It'll prob be "The Five N'Syncers" with the members of N'Sync building a theater in a poor town and performing to attract folks and raise money to save the town....

Coming in 2003...."Casablanca 2003" starring Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, and Freddie Prinze, Jr.....
2002-03-02 03:05:47 PM  
Oops...also FARK MGM! for their planned remaking of Logan's Run too...
2002-03-02 03:09:30 PM  

[image from too old to be available] +[image from too old to be available]=???
2002-03-02 03:11:47 PM  
star wars got it's basis from the hidden fortress, another kurosawa film
2002-03-02 03:15:22 PM  
C'mon you know it'd rule... if...

Seven Samurai, by Kevin Smith.
Starring Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith, Jason Lee, Jeff Anderson, Brian O'Halloran and Chris Rock.

"Bandits? Awww, I'm not even supposed to be here today!"

"The Empire would be great if it weren't for all the farking Samurai."

"The whole farking Empire's against us, I swear to Amaterasu."

Besides, it's been remade many times. Hell, "A Bug's Life" is a remake of Seven Samurai. Peasants (ants) seek warriors to help defend themselves against bandits (locusts), and together they defend their village (anthill).
2002-03-02 03:15:55 PM  
Another depressing observation, the STUDIO have decided to make this, no writer, no director, no script, nothing. Just a pitch to make some money and it's greenlighted. Dumbasses.
2002-03-02 03:17:18 PM  
Tomorrow: Casablanca, starring Leo DiCaprio, Britney Spears, and Michael Tucker as Sam.

I may throw up.
2002-03-02 03:23:13 PM  
The New Seven Samurai:

- Ben Affleck
- Matt Damon
- James Van der Beek (or whatever)
- Those two guys from Dude, Where's my Car?
- Adam Sandler
- And the veteran: Kevin Costner...
2002-03-02 03:25:14 PM  
boycott Miramax and MGM films.
2002-03-02 03:35:09 PM  
somebody please pluck out my eyes
2002-03-02 03:40:51 PM  
NO! FARK NO! God, if you are listening to me now, please don't let Hollywood make this movie. The Magnificent 7 was a great remake, but we no longer possess actors of such skill and grace to remake a movie of such stature any more. Please God, don't let these evils bastards destroy a wonderful movie! Amen.

PS: I FARKING HATE HOLLYWOOD! I can just see their list of actors now:

Bruce Willis as the veteran leader
Russel Crowe
Ben Affleck
Tom Cruise
Freddie Prinze Jr
John Leguizamo
and Busta Rhymes as Toshiro Mifune's character

2002-03-02 03:44:07 PM  
Hollywood does a remake? That isn't news.

The day they come up with an original idea will be.
2002-03-02 03:51:19 PM  
star wars was also heavily influenced by seven samurai... look at the characters... obi-wan is the master samuri, luke is the wanna-be, etc... i haven't seen it in long enough to pick out the others... watch them and you'll be able to.
2002-03-02 03:53:44 PM  
Hollywood is ONLY capable of remakes these days. All the brain cells have be lipo sucked out, or the silicone rot has set in. Hollywood is good for only one thing..Cheap Ho's walking the blvd, and good drugs. Hell the best network stuff is even made elsewhere.
2002-03-02 03:56:30 PM  
SLAYERSWINE's Seven Saurai

Clint Eastwood
Lee Ving
Steve Buscemi
Kurt Russell
Willem Dafoe
Leonard Dicaprio
Robert DeNiro

These 7 dudes would kick ass.
2002-03-02 04:06:07 PM  
7 Samurai is one of the greatest films ever made. The last battle in the rain is unbelievable. THere is no way to do justice to it.
2002-03-02 04:29:38 PM  
Slayerswine: What, no Harvey Keitel?
2002-03-02 04:30:54 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

The Japanese make the best films ever!
2002-03-02 04:31:54 PM  
Remember Willis in Pulp Fiction?

[image from too old to be available]
2002-03-02 04:35:10 PM  
Willis is apparently also starring in the remake of 2001:

[image from too old to be available]
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