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(Straits Times)   What would you do with 800kg of chewing tobacco? Singapore doesn't do NASCAR or baseball, so customs officers would really like to know   (straitstimes.com) divider line
    More: Weird, Malaysia-Singapore Second Link, Singapore, Smuggling, Chewing tobacco, SINGAPORE - Customs officers, Outline of health sciences, first instance, Checkpoints Authority  
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1257 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Feb 2023 at 10:20 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



30 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2023-02-04 8:56:16 PM  
There are a few of these around me.

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2023-02-04 9:41:58 PM  
That's pretty ballsy when you know that spitting carries fines, public caning, or jail time.

Ouch.
 
2023-02-04 10:26:57 PM  
What would you do with 800kg of chewing tobacco?

Well, spit, eventually.

/just a ton between the cheek and gum
 
2023-02-04 10:28:04 PM  
i don't know, use it as compost?
 
2023-02-04 10:29:00 PM  
Imagine, you could have gone your whole life never hearing this song...

Earl Dibbles Jr - The Country Boy Song (Official Music Video)
Youtube Vx5A6WMFzig
 
2023-02-04 10:34:50 PM  

MBooda: Well, spit, eventually.


media.tenor.comView Full Size
 
2023-02-04 10:43:09 PM  
I've heard Singapore described as a well run corporate state. They're such a-holes they got kicked out of Indonesia, IIRC. When you're there, imagine a strict granny is watching you, and don't put your feet on the furniture, and don't spit.
 
2023-02-04 10:44:07 PM  
Illegalizing anything creates an instant black market.
 
2023-02-04 10:45:15 PM  

Nick el Ass: MBooda: Well, spit, eventually.

[media.tenor.com image 640x478] [View Full Size image _x_]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-04 10:46:30 PM  

emonk: Illegalizing anything creates an instant black market.


That's a euphemism for "up the butt". It's always, "up the butt".
 
2023-02-04 10:47:46 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


What are we going to do with 800kg of chewing tobacco?
Awwww yeah.
Lets whisper sweet nothings to it..
Awwwww yeah.
 
2023-02-04 10:48:49 PM  
Make a tea out of it and use it to spray on your tomato plants to kill aphids and deter other pests.

/Yes...it works.
 
2023-02-04 10:52:47 PM  
enough to make ur jaw rot away from cancer
 
2023-02-04 10:54:10 PM  

The Official Fark Cajun: Make a tea out of it and use it to spray on your tomato plants to kill aphids and deter other pests.

/Yes...it works.


I came here to say that.

FWiW, tobacco can be grown to attract bugs. In the Caribbean they plant tobacco around crops to give the bugs something to eat.

The concentrated nicotine is a poison but the tobacco plants themselves are very tasty.

For the same reason to plant roses around grapes. The bugs will eat the roses before the grapes.
 
2023-02-04 10:57:53 PM  

The Official Fark Cajun: Make a tea out of it and use it to spray on your tomato plants to kill aphids and deter other pests.

/Yes...it works.


Add some plutonium for tomacco.
 
2023-02-04 11:02:54 PM  

jsmilky: enough to make ur jaw rot away from cancer


This. It's a disgusting habit, and IIRC, much, much more likely even than cigarettes to cause mouth/throat cancer.

What to do with it?
Being Singapore I'd say seal the smugglers in a room with it, fumigate them with the whole quantity, showcase the cancers they get.

/FWIW, those concerned about spitting it in public, it's easy to carry an empty coke can and spit into that as you hold it to your mouth like you're drinking.
//but then again, you're still walking around with a mouth that looks like you got stung
///disgusting, addictive habit. Used to wake up to toxic, quarter-full bottles of grime in the living room on the weekends
 
2023-02-04 11:03:08 PM  
if I were customs I'd search it for bales of Mehican d!tchw33d
 
2023-02-04 11:20:47 PM  
Strqange coinkydink. You use 800 kg to build a NASCAR car you can chew.
 
2023-02-04 11:22:22 PM  
Take it to the most remote location you can find, put it all in one big pile, and set it on fire. Stand upwind.

//Chewing tobacco has to be one of the most disgusting habits in existence
/If you doubt that, you likely have never looked into a spit cup before
 
2023-02-04 11:36:11 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-05 1:03:51 AM  
A family member way back when swore that the best way to clean car wash film off of a windshield was to soak some chewing tobacco in coca cola and put that in a dish towel to use as a scrubber. I don't know about you, but for me car wash film on the windshield has never been that big of an issue. Anyway, have fun with all the scrubbing, Singapore.
 
2023-02-05 1:11:34 AM  

replacementcool: i don't know, use it as compost?


Dunno what kind (if any) pesticide laws there are in Singapore but that's actually a viable use if you're growing root veggies that are prone to grub infestations without killing the pollinators.
 
2023-02-05 1:53:25 AM  

wildcardjack: I've heard Singapore described as a well run corporate state. They're such a-holes they got kicked out of Indonesia, IIRC. When you're there, imagine a strict granny is watching you, and don't put your feet on the furniture, and don't spit.


You don't recall correctly. That country directly north of them on the same penninsula is called Malaysia. Singpore mught be strict about spitting and gum, but they take care of their citizens (no homeless that I saw) and are definitely not assholes.
 
2023-02-05 3:28:38 AM  

The Prionic Woman: but they take care of their citizens (no homeless that I saw)


I don't know the specifics of Singapore's policies for homeless people, but you have to realize that "I didn't see any" doesn't mean there isn't a problem. It could be that they arrest them, and they're in jail out of sight. It could mean that they transport them outside of the city center to encampments. And it could mean that they treat them well and provide them with housing and job opportunities. The latter would be great, but I really farking doubt that's the case in Singapore.
 
2023-02-05 3:31:22 AM  

The Prionic Woman: and are definitely not assholes.


I can also promise you than Lee Kuan Yew is 100% an asshole. A smart one, but still an asshole.
 
2023-02-05 3:32:13 AM  

NobleHam: Lee Kuan Yew is was


FTFM.
 
2023-02-05 5:44:02 AM  
I was stuck in Buenos Aires during 9/11 and this fixer-type guy (who was actually Iraqi and everyone just called him "Iraqi") pulled me aside and solemnly gave me an almost empty bag of chew. I'm not a chew or a dip guy and I have no idea if chew is scarce down there but I accepted it and that day and I chewed some tobacco. So, Iraqi would give away 800kg of chew to his friends in times of need. I miss that guy.
 
2023-02-05 10:10:18 AM  

replacementcool: i don't know, use it as compost?


media-amazon.comView Full Size
 
2023-02-05 11:34:32 AM  
There aren't enough canes in Singapore for 800kg of chewing tobacco.
 
2023-02-05 2:31:52 PM  
Start growing Mullets.
 
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