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(Serious Eats)   Burrito is my spirit animal, here is my bible   (seriouseats.com) divider line
92
    More: Spiffy, Burrito, Mexican cuisine, Taco, Tortilla, United States, Corn tortilla, Enchilada, Meat  
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975 clicks; posted to Food » on 04 Feb 2023 at 2:13 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



92 Comments     (+0 »)
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majestic
2023-02-04 2:22:53 PM  
Dorado style = Hot Pockets.
 
ReapTheChaos
2023-02-04 2:39:14 PM  
If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.
 
olrasputin
2023-02-04 2:42:07 PM  
Bean, cheese, and chicharron, please.
 
WordsnCollision [OhFark]
2023-02-04 2:55:28 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-04 3:12:02 PM  

ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.


All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade
 
FatherChaos [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 3:16:17 PM  
Just be careful where you get them:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-04 3:22:58 PM  
This thread is full of chaos
 
Kitty2.0 [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-04 3:23:18 PM  

ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.


This. The best burrito I ever had was in a shiatty hole in the wall place. It was as big as a baby's leg and everything was amazingly fresh and tasty. Never found anything else like it.
 
ReapTheChaos
2023-02-04 3:37:37 PM  

151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade


Well the squeeze bottles are more for other condiments, like hot sauce, ketchup, etc.
 
tintar [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 3:53:14 PM  
so... burritos are tacos, but tacos flautas enchiladas and taquitos are all burritos?

[kenjeong dot jaypeg]
 
Telephone Sanitizer Second Class
2023-02-04 3:55:30 PM  

ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.


Also, it needs to have Christmas lights hung up outside year round.

Years of living in agricultural areas of the Pacific Northwest have given me fantastic Mexican food radar. I'll eat at every taco truck I can find. The uglier the truck, the better the food. I saw a hideously painted one the other day and went out of my way to try it. After I ordered a burrito and a torta, the woman casually mentioned that today they had tamales. When a taco truck offers you something not on the normal menu, you buy it. So I ended up with a giant delicious lunch. I even let my wife have some.
 
Axeofjudgement
2023-02-04 4:14:50 PM  
Well then Subby needs The Tortilla Temple, where the twin gods of Tortilla hold reign on the universe. May the chorizo spill forth and bless you in their blanket of warmth
 
drjekel_mrhyde
2023-02-04 4:30:29 PM  
I just order from the joints my Mexican friends would let their mother eat from.
 
anuran
2023-02-04 4:35:04 PM  

ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.


We had one of those two blocks from home. Eventually the nice lady who owned it closed the place because she was tired of losing whole shifts of employees to La Migra
 
Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist
2023-02-04 4:51:00 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
luna1580 [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 5:13:11 PM  

tintar: so... burritos are tacos, but tacos flautas enchiladas and taquitos are all burritos?

[kenjeong dot jaypeg]


And if you drop a tortilla on the ground, suddenly the entire earth becomes a taco! TTT shall shine that day upon us all with corn and flour glory as we dance upon our planet taco. And our patron saint tintar shall smile again....
 
cyberspacedout
2023-02-04 5:35:40 PM  
When I was in highschool, I was introduced to a Latin market with a hole-in-the-wall burrito place on the side that had carne al mojo de ajo. I came home once after eating there, and it was so strong on my breath that my mother thought something was wrong with me.

Those were good burritos.
 
Be polite walk on the right
2023-02-04 6:40:18 PM  
Paging Baphomet

Baphomet to thread 12741702
 
Be polite walk on the right
2023-02-04 6:42:30 PM  

majestic: Dorado style = Hot Pockets.


calzones

thestayathomechef.comView Full Size
 
oldfarthenry [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 7:43:15 PM  
My burrito-fueled spirit animal is a barking spider.

/contractual obligation
 
austerity101 [BareFark]
2023-02-04 8:51:58 PM  
Haven't people belonging to Native tribes been telling people not to say "spirit animal" for like, years now?
 
austerity101 [BareFark]
2023-02-04 8:52:23 PM  

ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.


Authenticity is a myth.
 
Gough
2023-02-04 9:37:31 PM  

151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.


As an aside, for years one of the notable details at our favorite hole-in-the-wall fish 'n' chips place, one of those where you can see into the kitchen, was how many guys on the line were wearing "lojacks".  I don't know if the owner was a con himself, but he was willing to give the guys a chance and taught them some good habits.
 
tintar [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 9:48:59 PM  

luna1580: tintar: so... burritos are tacos, but tacos flautas enchiladas and taquitos are all burritos?

[kenjeong dot jaypeg]

And if you drop a tortilla on the ground, suddenly the entire earth becomes a taco! TTT shall shine that day upon us all with corn and flour glory as we dance upon our planet taco. And our patron saint tintar shall smile again....


most any resulting planet is fine, even sanguich! just not that crummy cob planet...
 
NathanAllen
2023-02-04 10:06:58 PM  
Here. Here is where the dorado burrito attained legendary status.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Be polite walk on the right
2023-02-04 10:40:19 PM  
i2.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
olrasputin
2023-02-04 11:28:08 PM  

151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade


Um...I make several varieties of taqueria-style salsa that can easily be dispensed with a squeeze bottle (some based on these*, and also a simple arbol salsa).

And the default red and green salsas that come on the side at basically every taqueria or meat market around here have the same consistency. Hate to say it, but if you think salsa needs to be too chunky to work in a squeeze bottle, your Minnesota is showing...

*yes, her website organization is an absolute clusterfark; but she has some legit cool ideas in there
 
abhorrent1
2023-02-04 11:41:59 PM  
A Brief History of the Burrito

Stopped reading there. Just get to the farking point already.
 
johnny_vegas [TotalFark]
2023-02-05 12:03:02 AM  
San Diego farkers should try Quattros Milpas in Barrio Logan.  You get what was made that day and it is damn good.

las-cuatro-milpas.comView Full Size
 
Peter von Nostrand
2023-02-05 12:38:27 AM  

151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade


Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.
 
Axeofjudgement
2023-02-05 1:51:32 AM  

Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.


Oh fark outta here with that shiat.
 
Axeofjudgement
2023-02-05 2:35:30 AM  

olrasputin: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Um...I make several varieties of taqueria-style salsa that can easily be dispensed with a squeeze bottle (some based on these*, and also a simple arbol salsa).

And the default red and green salsas that come on the side at basically every taqueria or meat market around here have the same consistency. Hate to say it, but if you think salsa needs to be too chunky to work in a squeeze bottle, your Minnesota is showing...

*yes, her website organization is an absolute clusterfark; but she has some legit cool ideas in there


percise1 has a Garlic spritzer

Someday you'll have a Thai chili spritzer after you've killed half your tongue and stroked out
 
McGrits [TotalFark]
2023-02-05 8:03:04 AM  
A surprising article that is not all click bait trash and hate juice.

I need to learn how to make the Sonoran water tortillas.
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-05 8:52:13 AM  

Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.


Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?
 
luna1580 [TotalFark]
2023-02-05 10:26:30 AM  

151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?


hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-05 10:39:49 AM  

luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....


Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh
 
luna1580 [TotalFark]
2023-02-05 10:45:12 AM  

151: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh


sorry to hear about your 'rona (it probably is) i think me and peas and axe all had it in december or early january because "sickest i can remember being" was basically everyone's description of it. of course if you have chills and MAJOR body aches it could be this year's flu strain too.....
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-05 10:53:44 AM  

luna1580: 151: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh

sorry to hear about your 'rona (it probably is) i think me and peas and axe all had it in december or early january because "sickest i can remember being" was basically everyone's description of it. of course if you have chills and MAJOR body aches it could be this year's flu strain too.....


Only reason I don't think it's Covid is because it's "different" than the other times I actually had Covid. I can't really put it into scientific reasonable terms, mostly because I can't even think logically, all upper respiratory but I swear to baby Jesus it's melting my brain, which I never experienced before. Like the worst flu I ever had, fever dreams and shiat like that, but no actual flu symptoms. It farking sucks. Called in to work on Friday and Saturday for the first time in over 25 years of having a job. Texted the boss last night like I'll come in tomorrow even though I told you I'll never work Sundays (I farking hate brunch), but whoever had to pick up for me deserves today off and I'll suck it up. Woke up this morning like LOL NOPE NOT HAPPENING SORRY. I smoke at least a pack and a half a day, since Wednesday I've smoked maybe 4-5 cigarettes. THAT'S a great indicator of how bad this shiat is. I'm rambling I'm gonna shut up
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-05 11:04:28 AM  

151: luna1580: 151: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh

sorry to hear about your 'rona (it probably is) i think me and peas and axe all had it in december or early january because "sickest i can remember being" was basically everyone's description of it. of course if you have chills and MAJOR body aches it could be this year's flu strain too.....

Only reason I don't think it's Covid is because it's "different" than the other times I actually had Covid. I can't really put it into scientific reasonable terms, mostly because I can't even think logically, all upper respiratory but I swear to baby Jesus it's melting my brain, which I never experienced before. Like the worst flu I ever had, fever dreams and shiat like that, but no actual flu symptoms. It farking sucks. Called in to work on Friday and Saturday for the first time in over 25 years of having a job. Texted the boss last night like I'll come in tomorrow even though I told you I'll never work Sundays (I farking hate brunch), but whoever had to pick up for me deserves today off and I'll suck it up. Woke up this morning like LOL NOPE NOT HAPPENING SORRY. I smoke at least a pack and a half a day, since Wednesday I've smoked maybe 4-5 cigarettes. THAT'S a great indicator of how bad this shiat is. I'm rambling I'm gonna shut up


The real kicker in my asser was when I was trying to have a conversation with my friends kid, and he asked "why do you sound like Beetlejuice right now?"

That was when I realized, on Thursday night, ain't no damn way I'm going to work tomorrow. Also got his mom sick, which I apologized profusely for yesterday, in a very Beetlejuice sounding voice. She replied, extremely Beetlejuicely "it's ok"

I just want soup
 
olrasputin
2023-02-05 11:07:19 AM  

151: 151: luna1580: 151: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh

sorry to hear about your 'rona (it probably is) i think me and peas and axe all had it in december or early january because "sickest i can remember being" was basically everyone's description of it. of course if you have chills and MAJOR body aches it could be this year's flu strain too.....

Only reason I don't think it's Covid is because it's "different" than the other times I actually had Covid. I can't really put it into scientific reasonable terms, mostly because I can't even think logically, all upper respiratory but I swear to baby Jesus it's melting my brain, which I never experienced before. Like the worst flu I ever had, fever dreams and shiat like that, but no actual flu symptoms. It farking sucks. Called in to work on Friday and Saturday for the first time in over 25 years of having a job. Texted the boss last night like I'll come in tomorrow even though I told you I'll never work Sundays (I farking hate brunch), but whoever had to pick up for me deserves today off and I'll suck it up. Woke up this morning like LOL NOPE NOT HAPPENING SORRY. I smoke at least a pack and a half a day, since Wednesday I've smoked maybe 4-5 cigarettes. THAT'S a great indicator of how bad this shiat is. I'm rambling I'm gonna shut up

The real kicker in my asser was when I was trying to have a conversation with my friends kid, and he asked "why do you sound like Beetlejuice right now?"

That was when I realized, on Thursday night, ain't no damn way I'm going to work tomorrow. Also got his mom sick, which I apologized profusely for yesterday, in a very Beetlejuice sounding voice. She replied, extremely Beetlejuicely "it's ok"

I just want soup


Hell-kudos to your friend for having a kid who knows what Beetlejuice sounds like.
 
ski9600 [TotalFark]
2023-02-05 11:09:31 AM  

luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos 

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....


Around here, there is the "Orange" salsa. It kicks my arse. I think it's orange habanero with maybe water or stock in the blender jar. Mix that up and add sour cream or crema. Does anyone have the recipe?
 
Axeofjudgement
2023-02-05 11:37:37 AM  

151: 151: luna1580: 151: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos you need to drive over the the shiatty side of town and look for a place that should have been closed by the health department 20 years ago. The building could have been a restaurant originally, but could just as likely have once been a gas station. The menu will be on the wall in Spanish, and they will sell for about $2.50 each. At lunch time the parking lot will be overflowing with pick-up trucks and vans, with 8 or 10 people riding in each.

Condiments (like salsa) will be made from scratch and come in little plastic cups, or squeeze bottles on the tables. If they come in those packets like ketchup, turn around and walk out, it's not authentic.

All of these things are true, with two exceptions. More cop cars than trucks in the parking lot. Either because the cops are there eating, or arresting the lead line Cook.

And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

Thanks for the thinly disguised racism in food post.

Lmao what the fark racism did you perceive? Cops aren't a race. Cooks aren't a race. fark you talking about?

hey how's things? you been good? you are missed.

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Yeah I dunno wtf I was on about on that rant, every place in southwest Detroit has those too.

I'm ok. Busy as absolute fark and since Monday I've been the sickest I've ever been in my life. Hopefully not Covid, but eh

sorry to hear about your 'rona (it probably is) i think me and peas and axe all had it in december or early january because "sickest i can remember being" was basically everyone's description of it. of course if you have chills and MAJOR body aches it could be this year's flu strain too.....

Only reason I don't think it's Covid is because it's "different" than the other times I actually had Covid. I can't really put it into scientific reasonable terms, mostly because I can't even think logically, all upper respiratory but I swear to baby Jesus it's melting my brain, which I never experienced before. Like the worst flu I ever had, fever dreams and shiat like that, but no actual flu symptoms. It farking sucks. Called in to work on Friday and Saturday for the first time in over 25 years of having a job. Texted the boss last night like I'll come in tomorrow even though I told you I'll never work Sundays (I farking hate brunch), but whoever had to pick up for me deserves today off and I'll suck it up. Woke up this morning like LOL NOPE NOT HAPPENING SORRY. I smoke at least a pack and a half a day, since Wednesday I've smoked maybe 4-5 cigarettes. THAT'S a great indicator of how bad this shiat is. I'm rambling I'm gonna shut up

The real kicker in my asser was when I was trying to have a conversation with my friends kid, and he asked "why do you sound like Beetlejuice right now?"

That was when I realized, on Thursday night, ain't no damn way I'm going to work tomorrow. Also got his mom sick, which I apologized profusely for yesterday, in a very Beetlejuice sounding voice. She replied, extremely Beetlejuicely "it's ok"

I just want soup


Sounds like what just went around our job.  It was like a month of coughs lost voice fever sweating etc...  I killed 160 cough drops in 4 days to keep going.
 
sotua
2023-02-05 11:45:31 AM  

Be polite walk on the right: majestic: Dorado style = Hot Pockets.

calzones

[thestayathomechef.com image 850x566]


That's an empanada.
 
sotua
2023-02-05 11:49:51 AM  

ski9600: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos 

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Around here, there is the "Orange" salsa. It kicks my arse. I think it's orange habanero with maybe water or stock in the blender jar. Mix that up and add sour cream or crema. Does anyone have the recipe?


Raw habaneros are awesome in thin slices with sauce and thin slices of onion and a pinch of salt. I could see pureeing that and using it as sauce.
 
sotua
2023-02-05 11:50:23 AM  

sotua: ski9600: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos 

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Around here, there is the "Orange" salsa. It kicks my arse. I think it's orange habanero with maybe water or stock in the blender jar. Mix that up and add sour cream or crema. Does anyone have the recipe?

Raw habaneros are awesome in thin slices with sauce and thin slices of onion and a pinch of salt. I could see pureeing that and using it as sauce.


Ah goddammit, habanero and onion thin slices *in lemon juice* with a pinch of salt.
 
olrasputin
2023-02-05 11:58:17 AM  

ski9600: luna1580: 151: Peter von Nostrand: 151: ReapTheChaos: If you want authentic Mexican burritos

but olar is right that squeeze bottle red and green salsa is super legit. i like the green best! every good burrito joint in chicagoland has the squeeze bottles and little cups to go....

Around here, there is the "Orange" salsa. It kicks my arse. I think it's orange habanero with maybe water or stock in the blender jar. Mix that up and add sour cream or crema. Does anyone have the recipe?


If it's creamy, the habaneros are probably poached in a neutral oil, then blended with salt, lime juice, garlic, and enough oil to hit the texture you want.
 
Oneiros [OhFark]
2023-02-05 12:22:37 PM  

151: And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade


There are plenty of salsas that go through a blender, sometimes then cooked a second time afterwards.  They'll go through a squeeze bottle that's got a decent sized opening.

Here's one from Pati Jinich:
Pati Jinich - Salsa Verde with Chile de Árbol
Youtube KHqvN05ZSRU



/has learned from her show that you're supposed to put green salsa on red tacos
//and red salsa on green tacos
 
151 [OhFark]
2023-02-05 12:29:40 PM  

Oneiros: 151: And if you have a squeeze bottle of salsa on the table, get right the fark out, how you gonna squeeze ANY kind of salsa through any kind of squeeze bottle opening. That shiat ain't legit or homemade

There are plenty of salsas that go through a blender, sometimes then cooked a second time afterwards.  They'll go through a squeeze bottle that's got a decent sized opening.

Here's one from Pati Jinich:
[YouTube video: Pati Jinich - Salsa Verde with Chile de Árbol]


/has learned from her show that you're supposed to put green salsa on red tacos
//and red salsa on green tacos


What the fark is a sesame? It's a way to open shiat
 
wouldestous
2023-02-05 12:33:58 PM  

FatherChaos: Just be careful where you get them:

[Fark user image 625x468]


imageproxy.ifunny.coView Full Size
 
Oneiros [OhFark]
2023-02-05 12:35:21 PM  

McGrits: A surprising article that is not all click bait trash and hate juice.

I need to learn how to make the Sonoran water tortillas.


I would need a bigger griddle to make sobaqueras tortillas.  I can only do maybe 16" across right now.

Korean Korner in Rockville, MD used to sell them, but I haven't seen them there in the past year or so.  I don't think I've been to MegaMart recently, I should go check there.

If you have Netflix, check the episode of The Taco Chronicles where they covered burritos... they show how to assemble them.  (You fold 1/3 or so in, put down the filling, fold in the other side, then roll, if I remember the order correctly.  One side ends up being open, but you have more structural integrity on the sides)

I think that's where I learned that you're supposed to shake on hot sauce between bites, rather than trying to unwrap, sauce, and re-wrap
 
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