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(Slate)   M. Night Shamalamadong's new film is probably too scary for most of his fans, who are really just there for the twist, anyway   (slate.com) divider line
54
    More: Dumbass, M. Night Shyamalan, Fear, Doomsday Clock, Belief, Horror film, The Sixth Sense, Staffordshire, horror movie  
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3434 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Feb 2023 at 9:38 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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fragMasterFlash [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 7:15:12 PM  
I think most people are going hold out for the deepfake version that replaces the character played by Dave Bautista with Drax.
 
born_yesterday [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 7:28:03 PM  
That slumdog bastard twisted all of us!
 
Three Crooked Squirrels [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 8:05:25 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
Mrtraveler01
2023-02-03 9:43:40 PM  
media.tenor.comView Full Size
 
Telephone Sanitizer Second Class
2023-02-03 9:47:27 PM  
Oh, is this the one based on the Paul Tremblay novel The Cabin at the End of the World? That someone in charge has renamed and wiped any references to the source material in all the promotions?

Yeah, it can get farked.
 
The Four Ringer [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 9:47:53 PM  
I'm watching Old right now, so I'm getting a kick...
 
puffy999 [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 9:47:54 PM  
Beavis & Butthead / The Cramps - Ultra Twist
Youtube -CGZ5mk51mM
 
Bslim
2023-02-03 9:51:21 PM  
Shamahackalong is the ultimate manifestation of a Hollywood disease: Eyeball-it Syndrome. F*ckers who don't know shiat about anything but will jump into any project for a paycheck, f*ck canon, f*ck the audience, f*ck their own mothers. These are your Kurtzman's, your JJ's and this sack of walking crap.
 
daffy
2023-02-03 9:51:25 PM  

fragMasterFlash: I think most people are going hold out for the deepfake version that replaces the character played by Dave Bautista with Drax.


That's the one I would watch.
 
I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 9:53:10 PM  

Mrtraveler01: [media.tenor.com image 220x159]


I'm a little sad this took four replies but I'm mostly glad that I came here for this and it was here.
 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 9:54:49 PM  
Well, that doesn't sound totally derivative of practically every movie since the beginning of ever.

A deft hand could make it both scary and thrilling, but Shaymalan is not that hand.
 
baronbloodbath [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 9:55:05 PM  
I live by where this was filmed, so I'm getting a kick.

/ignore the banjo, paddle faster
 
SirMadness
2023-02-03 9:56:52 PM  
Nostalgia Critic: Lord Shyamalan (uncut)
Youtube vGTgqPX7wiY
 
Tarl3k
2023-02-03 10:03:52 PM  
Sigh, if you take all of the good parts of the movies he's made after The Sixth Sense, you can probably combine them into one decent movie.  Unbreakable had some good parts, Signs has some good pieces, and Split had the skeleton of a good movie...but I'm not sure why anybody cares what he makes anymore.
 
Spawn_of_Cthulhu
2023-02-03 10:13:02 PM  

Telephone Sanitizer Second Class: Oh, is this the one based on the Paul Tremblay novel The Cabin at the End of the World? That someone in charge has renamed and wiped any references to the source material in all the promotions?

Yeah, it can get farked.


Yeah, it is.
 
Jake Havechek [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 10:13:03 PM  
The Village has a really cool Twilight Zone plot and twist, but his movies have pacing problems.  By the time he gets to the mind blowing scene, you're already bored.
 
StaleCoffee
2023-02-03 10:18:25 PM  
He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.
 
Iczer
2023-02-03 10:18:49 PM  

Tarl3k: Sigh, if you take all of the good parts of the movies he's made after The Sixth Sense, you can probably combine them into one decent movie.  Unbreakable had some good parts, Signs has some good pieces, and Split had the skeleton of a good movie...but I'm not sure why anybody cares what he makes anymore.


The trees are invading the home of a family that grew older at a beach for pharmaceutical research (or whatever the fark it was) while the Devil watches as a corpse...?
 
yakmans_dad
2023-02-03 10:24:04 PM  
Beetlejuice has the scariest premise: there is no grand reckoning at death; everyone just continues on into infinite decrepitude.
 
StaleCoffee
2023-02-03 10:25:01 PM  

StaleCoffee: He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.


I have never, anywhere, stated "I hope he dies" about anyone including Donald Trump. Never. I will never say that again. Ever, about anyone.

Except M. Night Shamalayananananan.

I hope he dies.
 
thisisyourbrainonFark
2023-02-03 10:36:44 PM  

yakmans_dad: infinite decrepitude


Good metal band name.

"Split" was pretty good, but only because of James McAvoy.

/wow, didn't realize he was behind "After Earth," yeesh
 
cew-smoke
2023-02-03 10:43:25 PM  
I've heard that this movie ranks up as one of his best. Don't know for sure, but I'll give it a try.
 
AppleOptionEsc
2023-02-03 10:55:09 PM  

StaleCoffee: StaleCoffee: He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.

I have never, anywhere, stated "I hope he dies" about anyone including Donald Trump. Never. I will never say that again. Ever, about anyone.

Except M. Night Shamalayananananan.

I hope he dies.


Touch grass.
 
Noah_Tall
2023-02-03 11:03:07 PM  
Show the man some respect Subby.  The name is Shamalamadingdong.
 
baxterdog
2023-02-03 11:03:16 PM  
I thought his name was Shamalamadingdong? Is subby under forty? Know your history to meme correctly!
 
Spice Must Flow
2023-02-03 11:05:00 PM  
What does Sixth Sense have in common with Titanic?
Icy dead people.
 
baxterdog
2023-02-03 11:05:27 PM  
All right, Noah, what part of Seattle are you at? We might have to meet at Beth's now that they've reopened. \m/
 
MythDragon
2023-02-03 11:05:58 PM  

StaleCoffee: StaleCoffee: He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.

I have never, anywhere, stated "I hope he dies" about anyone including Donald Trump. Never. I will never say that again. Ever, about anyone.

Except M. Night Shamalayananananan.

I hope he dies.


Can you show us on the doll where M. Night Shambhalambalaylan touched you?
 
abhorrent1
2023-02-03 11:09:45 PM  
So they compare it to a quiet place? Okay, now I know not to waste my time.
 
The Exit Stencilist
2023-02-03 11:31:29 PM  
I want rustling plants and aliens who are thwarted by rain!
 
buravirgil
2023-02-03 11:46:47 PM  

The Exit Stencilist: I want rustling plants and aliens who are thwarted by rain!


A spoiler for an old movie, okay. Said spoiler is also acerbic and mocking?
Maybe you're just mean.
But rustling and thwarted? That's diction of such care and consideration to betray love.
 
R0AHN
2023-02-03 11:50:52 PM  

MythDragon: StaleCoffee: StaleCoffee: He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.

I have never, anywhere, stated "I hope he dies" about anyone including Donald Trump. Never. I will never say that again. Ever, about anyone.

Except M. Night Shamalayananananan.

I hope he dies.

Can you show us on the doll where M. Night Shambhalambalaylan touched you?


Clearly in the Shamalamalamalllamadingdangdong.
 
Smurfnazi420
2023-02-03 11:57:18 PM  

Bslim: Shamahackalong is the ultimate manifestation of a Hollywood disease: Eyeball-it Syndrome. F*ckers who don't know shiat about anything but will jump into any project for a paycheck, f*ck canon, f*ck the audience, f*ck their own mothers. These are your Kurtzman's, your JJ's and this sack of walking crap.


But tell me how you really feel.
 
rdnjr1234
2023-02-04 12:01:53 AM  
I'll never forgive him for what he did to Avatar.
 
CarnySaur [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 12:32:24 AM  
I think the big twist is that this story is on FARK's Main page!
 
blackminded
2023-02-04 1:27:13 AM  
I always wondered, why Anglicize "Manoj" into "M. Night" but keep Shyamalan?

/McAvoy was the bomb in Split, yo
 
bikkurikun
2023-02-04 2:39:55 AM  
He needs to focus on making an avatar sequel. The first one was brilliant but the animated series that followed was rather bland and mediocre.
 
Commander Lysdexic
2023-02-04 5:44:36 AM  
Twist: it was all a dream.
 
Mister Peejay
2023-02-04 7:23:56 AM  

yakmans_dad: Beetlejuice has the scariest premise: there is no grand reckoning at death; everyone just continues on into infinite decrepitude.


Infinite bureaucracy.  Run by people who hated life so much that they killed themselves.
 
darwinpolice [BareFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-04 8:04:09 AM  

The Four Ringer: I'm watching Old right now, so I'm getting a kick...


I don't think I've ever seen a movie with more inexplicably stupid, unnatural dialog than that movie.
 
Breaker Breaker
2023-02-04 8:16:32 AM  
Bruce was SO obviously a ghost, I knew it almost immediately, no one else interacted with him. Living people were cold when he was in the room. I can't brag about being sophisticated about movie plots, so please allow me this one questionably humble claim to fame. Great movie, however, even though I said "Well, duh" at the big reveal.
 
Snort
2023-02-04 9:13:09 AM  
I just read the Wikipedia summary so I don't needlessly suffer.
 
NeoCortex42 [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 9:15:13 AM  

Tarl3k: Sigh, if you take all of the good parts of the movies he's made after The Sixth Sense, you can probably combine them into one decent movie.  Unbreakable had some good parts, Signs has some good pieces, and Split had the skeleton of a good movie...but I'm not sure why anybody cares what he makes anymore.


I enjoyed Unbreakable.  I thought Split was really good.  Glass was frustrating because I liked it well enough, but just when it started to feel like it was going to get great (direct confrontation in the open and the world being aware), the movie ends.  I'd be up for a follow-up movie in that world, honestly.

Overall, I think M. Night has an excellent eye for cinematography and color, but he really needs a better writer with him.
 
The Four Ringer [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-04 9:58:00 AM  

darwinpolice: The Four Ringer: I'm watching Old right now, so I'm getting a kick...

I don't think I've ever seen a movie with more inexplicably stupid, unnatural dialog than that movie.


I was glad that I was on Fark at the time so I had an ample distraction. The premise was interesting but the movie was garbage. On par for him
 
deadsanta
2023-02-04 10:18:23 AM  
NeoCortex42:
I enjoyed Unbreakable.  I thought Split was really good.  Glass was frustrating because I liked it well enough, but just when it started to feel like it was going to get great (direct confrontation in the open and the world being aware), the movie ends.  I'd be up for a follow-up movie in that world, honestly.

Overall, I think M. Night has an excellent eye for cinematography and color, but he really needs a better writer with him.

The problem with Knight is that he can barely write, he's at like high school or low-college skillset with his plotting and his dialogue, ugh.  He should get himself a great ghostwriter, pun intended, and stick to direction/cinematography.  Or just crank out Corman-level pulp and stop trying to dress it up as a major work.
 
Tarl3k
2023-02-04 1:10:53 PM  

NeoCortex42: I enjoyed Unbreakable.  I thought Split was really good.  Glass was frustrating because I liked it well enough, but just when it started to feel like it was going to get great (direct confrontation in the open and the world being aware), the movie ends.  I'd be up for a follow-up movie in that world, honestly.

Overall, I think M. Night has an excellent eye for cinematography and color, but he really needs a better writer with him.


Yeah, Unbreakable and Split had the potential to be great movies, but as you said, the writing didn't allow them to become what they should have been.  i gave up on Glass about 20 minutes in, just wasn't what I wanted to see at that point.  Glad ti find out that it fizzles out before the necessary confrontation happens, and I was right to abandon it.
 
itsaback
2023-02-04 1:11:17 PM  

Bslim: Shamahackalong is the ultimate manifestation of a Hollywood disease: Eyeball-it Syndrome. F*ckers who don't know shiat about anything but will jump into any project for a paycheck, f*ck canon, f*ck the audience, f*ck their own mothers. These are your Kurtzman's, your JJ's and this sack of walking crap.


which Kurtzman are you referring to?
 
NeoCortex42 [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 1:20:33 PM  
After reading the plot synopsis of Knock at the Cabin, it sounds like a way less fun version of Cabin in the Woods.
 
NeoCortex42 [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 1:23:10 PM  

Tarl3k: NeoCortex42: I enjoyed Unbreakable.  I thought Split was really good.  Glass was frustrating because I liked it well enough, but just when it started to feel like it was going to get great (direct confrontation in the open and the world being aware), the movie ends.  I'd be up for a follow-up movie in that world, honestly.

Overall, I think M. Night has an excellent eye for cinematography and color, but he really needs a better writer with him.

Yeah, Unbreakable and Split had the potential to be great movies, but as you said, the writing didn't allow them to become what they should have been.  i gave up on Glass about 20 minutes in, just wasn't what I wanted to see at that point.  Glad ti find out that it fizzles out before the necessary confrontation happens, and I was right to abandon it.


The disappointment of Glass was I'd rather watch a movie where the third act of Glass was the start of the story instead of the end of it. I hope he revisits that world again, but I'm fairly certain he's done with it.
 
BonoboJeezus
2023-02-04 1:47:24 PM  

MythDragon: StaleCoffee: StaleCoffee: He has zero original ideas since his first film and literally just farking makes trash versions of stories someone else has done a better version of first. Every single farking film since "I see dead people" is just a shiatty, garbage, filthyass ugly fail-version of something someone else has done almost immediately prior to his shiatty farking attempt at redoing it. He is a worse storyteller than Michael farking Bay. If you took Michael Bay's budget and subtracted 100 million dollars, then subtracted all the intelligence of the rodent that wrote the script, then subtracted a half gallon of milk, you might get a movie this shiat heel wrote.

He is pure garbage and I don't understand why the fark imbeciles keep giving him money. He's the far right idiot republican of hollywood film industry. His stupidity has shocking staying power. JK rowling should suck his dick for his magical idiot glittersperm.

I hope he dies.

I have never, anywhere, stated "I hope he dies" about anyone including Donald Trump. Never. I will never say that again. Ever, about anyone.

Except M. Night Shamalayananananan.

I hope he dies.

Can you show us on the doll where M. Night Shambhalambalaylan touched you?


My brain and eyeballs.
 
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