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(CBS News)   Companies save billions of dollars by giving employees fake "manager" titles instead of paying them more. Subby wants Drew to name him VP of the Politics tab   (cbsnews.com) divider line
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    More: Obvious, JPMorgan Chase, Research, Title, Wage, Salary, Employment, University of Texas at Dallas, Management  
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673 clicks; posted to Business » on 03 Feb 2023 at 8:50 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



41 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
bostonguy [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 8:28:43 AM  
Subby wants Drew to name him VP of the Politics tab

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Two Dogs Farking [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 8:38:03 AM  
Sorry, Subby - you'll have to fight me for it.
 
DoBeDoBeDo [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 8:46:12 AM  
I'd wager any of the big 4 accounting firms is ~50% Vice Presidents of some sort or other.
 
p89tech
2023-02-03 8:53:32 AM  
Banks are notorious for it.
 
claytonemery [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 8:57:24 AM  
God, I saw this time and again working in industry.  Employees who've stuck around for ages are eventually made "managers" with nothing to do.  So they get a desk on "Useless Row" and spend their time sticking fingers into real workers' work.

Then, the first time the company takes a downturn, all the deadwood gets cleared out.  First they're offered an "incentive" to retire.  If they don't get the hint, they're booted out in a few weeks.

The funny part is that anyone who sticks around at a company for years hasn't any gumption to improve themselves by moving on.  So they're automatically useless.  Yet if they hunker down, they get promoted just because.  Weird.
 
NewportBarGuy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 8:57:31 AM  
Wasn't this an episode of Cheers?

"I can't afford to give you a raise, but I can give you a title!"
 
Cajnik [OhFark]
2023-02-03 8:59:21 AM  
My company did this and I'm not happy. I'm a director with no direct reports.

I'm a bit worried when it comes to future interviews
 
krebshack
2023-02-03 9:00:32 AM  
Back when I used to work in a grocery store, the only people who became managers were the people stupid enough to fall for this trick. Granted, they got a bit of a pay bump at first, but they gave up the regularly scheduled pay raise for union members and the union protection whenever the company tried to pull some shady stuff.

And for busy seasons like 4th of July, Thanksgiving, or Christmas they always ended up earning less than because they weren't getting paid OT.

We had one manager in the dry goods department, nice guy, who earned less on an annual basis than most of the people he supervised specifically because he gave those things up.
 
shinji3i
2023-02-03 9:02:30 AM  
Dennis Reynolds God Hole
Youtube Wf7IgoXQk-M
 
natazha [BareFark]
2023-02-03 9:02:53 AM  
California has (or at least had when I was working) a special exemption, so IT people were completely excluded from getting overtime or being paid for more than 40 hours a week.
 
Another Government Employee
2023-02-03 9:03:10 AM  
Well, duh.

Exemption from FLSA saves 20% or more on every job unit. It also makes it more difficult for those units to unionize under LRB rules.
 
ajgeek [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 9:16:05 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Emposter [OhFark]
2023-02-03 9:18:32 AM  
In other news, corporations do evil shiat because no one makes them pay for doing it.

More exciting news at 11.
 
bostonguy [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 9:25:21 AM  

Cajnik: My company did this and I'm not happy. I'm a director with no direct reports.


Exactly the same thing happened to me once at a marketing agency.
 
pissnmoan
2023-02-03 9:31:02 AM  
This information brought to you by First Assistant Jizz Moppers everywhere.
 
holdmybones
2023-02-03 9:36:23 AM  

Cajnik: My company did this and I'm not happy. I'm a director with no direct reports.

I'm a bit worried when it comes to future interviews


I worked for a startup whose sales org consisted of teams of directors (sales reps) who reported to VPs, and those VPs (including one with zero reports) reported to a VP, who reported to a CRO. The company had about 100 emp.
 
Bslim
2023-02-03 9:36:55 AM  
I want to be Assistant CEO to the Executive Manager in charge of things!
 
FormlessOne
2023-02-03 9:49:17 AM  
Nothing like watching folks re-discover exempt employee abuse. It's been going on for decades, as the article notes.
 
jso2897
2023-02-03 9:55:25 AM  

FormlessOne: Nothing like watching folks re-discover exempt employee abuse. It's been going on for decades, as the article notes.


Well, I'm bored - let's have an exciting story about black teenagers smashing display cases, and how awful and terrifying it is.
 
The Ocho
2023-02-03 9:59:38 AM  
I'm a manager without direct reports or delegated buying/spending approval. However I work closely and advise many managers that have both.

My leadership team calls my role a manager because the other managers are my peers in business judgement, strategy, and senior leadership advisement.
 
Lyonstaff
2023-02-03 10:29:40 AM  

The Ocho: I'm a manager without direct reports or delegated buying/spending approval. However I work closely and advise many managers that have both.

My leadership team calls my role a manager because the other managers are my peers in business judgement, strategy, and senior leadership advisement.


So...you're propping up the work accomplishments of others who will actually be able to put Managerial Experience on a resume?
 
Tyrone Slothrop [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 10:47:24 AM  
Last place I worked at, the only way you could get a raise was getting a promotion to a new title. Otherwise you'd get a "cost of living" adjustment that was less than the rate of inflation. And if you were happy in your position and didn't want a promotion, well, tough luck.
 
Tyrone Slothrop [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 10:51:52 AM  

claytonemery: God, I saw this time and again working in industry.  Employees who've stuck around for ages are eventually made "managers" with nothing to do.  So they get a desk on "Useless Row" and spend their time sticking fingers into real workers' work.

Then, the first time the company takes a downturn, all the deadwood gets cleared out.  First they're offered an "incentive" to retire.  If they don't get the hint, they're booted out in a few weeks.

The funny part is that anyone who sticks around at a company for years hasn't any gumption to improve themselves by moving on.  So they're automatically useless.  Yet if they hunker down, they get promoted just because.  Weird.


The funny thing is you think you have to "improve yourself" and "move on". Because clearly there's no value in simply being able to do something well, and having institutional knowledge. Sounds like you'd be just as bad running a company as the people you worked for.
 
thrasherrr
2023-02-03 11:00:42 AM  
Sadly, I thought TFA would be about companies like AT&T who make every line employee in right to work states a manager so they can't join the union.
 
dbirchall [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 11:07:14 AM  

natazha: California has (or at least had when I was working) a special exemption, so IT people were completely excluded from getting overtime or being paid for more than 40 hours a week.


"Exempt" employees are not at all unique to California.

When I was younger and dumber, I was once "VP of Technology" in a 2-person shop.
 
Short Victoria's War
2023-02-03 11:33:33 AM  
One place I worked gave the receptionist some sort of executive title.
Then signing authority, to 'streamline things'.
Then pointed the finger at her when the police came asking questions...

/I don't know nuffin' I just work here...
 
Lambskincoat [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 11:58:56 AM  
I once did a temp job in CA where the guy I worked with wanted to be named dept. manager so he could boss me around temporarily until the second of the two person dept could be hired. He totally lost his shiate when he didn't get it, his boss told me they didn't give it to him because he was a jerk. This was 30 yrs ago and I thought he was a moron. He was about 20 yrs older than I was. People in the US desire power even in the stupidest of situations.
 
Thosw [BareFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 12:29:11 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Last place I worked at, the only way you could get a raise was getting a promotion to a new title. Otherwise you'd get a "cost of living" adjustment that was less than the rate of inflation. And if you were happy in your position and didn't want a promotion, well, tough luck.


Came here to say this. Spent five years at the top of my salary band because I hadn't been promoted. 27 years now and I'm still considered just a First Level Officer, but my pay is going up again and I'm eligible for bonuses.

/don't want to manage
//know too many co-worker secrets
 
Autoerotic Defenestration
2023-02-03 12:35:01 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
runwiz [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-03 1:02:04 PM  
I never cared about my job title.  Usually never knew what it was.  Main concern was the dollar amount on the paycheck.
 
Flowery Twats
2023-02-03 1:04:06 PM  

Thosw: Tyrone Slothrop: Last place I worked at, the only way you could get a raise was getting a promotion to a new title. Otherwise you'd get a "cost of living" adjustment that was less than the rate of inflation. And if you were happy in your position and didn't want a promotion, well, tough luck.

Came here to say this. Spent five years at the top of my salary band because I hadn't been promoted. 27 years now and I'm still considered just a First Level Officer, but my pay is going up again and I'm eligible for bonuses.

/don't want to manage
//know too many co-worker secrets


Me, too. Finally, just retired and came back as an hourly contractor. Same money, fewer hassles.
 
tricycleracer
2023-02-03 1:21:08 PM  
7-11 was notorious for making every single employee an assistant manager to skirt overtime.
 
claytonemery [TotalFark]
2023-02-03 1:30:41 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: claytonemery: God, I saw this time and again working in industry.  Employees who've stuck around for ages are eventually made "managers" with nothing to do.  So they get a desk on "Useless Row" and spend their time sticking fingers into real workers' work.

Then, the first time the company takes a downturn, all the deadwood gets cleared out.  First they're offered an "incentive" to retire.  If they don't get the hint, they're booted out in a few weeks.

The funny part is that anyone who sticks around at a company for years hasn't any gumption to improve themselves by moving on.  So they're automatically useless.  Yet if they hunker down, they get promoted just because.  Weird.

The funny thing is you think you have to "improve yourself" and "move on". Because clearly there's no value in simply being able to do something well, and having institutional knowledge. Sounds like you'd be just as bad running a company as the people you worked for.


I can see how you might think that.  But these were computer companies.  Everything changed all the time.  You had to keep learning and evolving just to do the work.  Yet there were people who excelled at dodging work and doing nothing, just hung around.  When the economy would take a downturn or the work dried up, ambitious people moved on.  Those who stayed behind contributed nothing, just kept their heads down.  And would get promoted as job vacancies came open, and eventually became managers -- all without ever doing a lick of work.  So when the company eventually took a hit, they were first to get the axe.  And holy mackerel, there was no way they could get another job because they hadn't DONE anything for years.  A lot just gave up, took "early retirement", and went to work in a liquor store or something.
 
gyorg [SwearJar]
2023-02-03 4:48:39 PM  

claytonemery: God, I saw this time and again working in industry.  Employees who've stuck around for ages are eventually made "managers" with nothing to do.  So they get a desk on "Useless Row" and spend their time sticking fingers into real workers' work.

Then, the first time the company takes a downturn, all the deadwood gets cleared out.  First they're offered an "incentive" to retire.  If they don't get the hint, they're booted out in a few weeks.

The funny part is that anyone who sticks around at a company for years hasn't any gumption to improve themselves by moving on.  So they're automatically useless.  Yet if they hunker down, they get promoted just because.  Weird.


That reminds me, I've been meaning to read "Bullshit jobs"
 
Coredatum
2023-02-03 4:51:36 PM  
This article confirms something that I've suspected for a while, and likely explains all the people I see on LinkedIn with the title of 'Director' of something.
 
Coredatum
2023-02-03 4:55:16 PM  

The Ocho: I'm a manager without direct reports or delegated buying/spending approval. However I work closely and advise many managers that have both.

My leadership team calls my role a manager because the other managers are my peers in business judgement, strategy, and senior leadership advisement.


I'm in a similar role as this.  At my company, it's called an ICM (Independently Contributing Manager).  I work with other managers and directors but don't have any direct reports, which is fine by me.
 
Koodz
2023-02-03 10:46:12 PM  
Just this week my company "promoted" every office manager to Regional Vice President of wherever their office was.

I asked if I could be named Regional Vice President of the northeast end of the second floor hallway but I haven't heard back yet.
 
Warrior Kermit
2023-02-04 6:31:25 AM  
I work for a small business owner who has 10 stores, He and the GM would promote people to managers at a salary 50 plus hours exempt from OT yet pay them less than the federal guidelines allow.  both from NY knowing these folks in these small rural southern towns either wouldn't know they are getting screwed or be too afraid to lose their jobs to say anything.
 
dryknife
2023-02-04 7:45:28 AM  
Director of Extravagant Title Creation would be a nice position, but you would have to be one of those running the game, not one being played.
 
morg
2023-02-04 10:07:18 AM  
My company gave everyone over grade X the Assistant Vice President role and only in the directory but I'm not sure where that's going because we have a presence in California and California does not muck around when it comes to overtime. I wouldn't be surprised if it was a software limitation in Workday.
There were many years when 50-80 hours was normal, all laboring under the belief that there was an end in sight and then we'd be able to go back to "normal". Instead, "normal" is continually redefined to whatever we did in the best quarter within the past 5 years. I'm depressed and it sucks but don't worry about me, I have a plan to extricate myself.

/no guns inovled in this plan!
 
PhoenixFarker [TotalFark]
2023-02-04 12:29:26 PM  

claytonemery: God, I saw this time and again working in industry.  Employees who've stuck around for ages are eventually made "managers" with nothing to do.  So they get a desk on "Useless Row" and spend their time sticking fingers into real workers' work.

Then, the first time the company takes a downturn, all the deadwood gets cleared out.  First they're offered an "incentive" to retire.  If they don't get the hint, they're booted out in a few weeks.

The funny part is that anyone who sticks around at a company for years hasn't any gumption to improve themselves by moving on.  So they're automatically useless.  Yet if they hunker down, they get promoted just because.  Weird.


The dumbest hot take today.
 
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