Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Yahoo)   "2 reasons Meta stock is exploding 20% after a whopper earnings miss", does not mention if Zuck found the ideal tip-to-tip efficiency or how he got the mean jerk time down   (finance.yahoo.com) divider line
15
    More: Misc, Share (finance), Shares outstanding, Share repurchase, Employment, Company, Earnings per share, Expense, Market capitalization  
•       •       •

357 clicks; posted to Business » on 02 Feb 2023 at 1:50 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



15 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
Farking Clown Shoes [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 1:29:31 PM  
Zuckerbot announced a "year of efficiency" and the investors lapped it up, because they love efficient robots.

It amazes me that they haven't considered that Meta is next on the DOJ antitrust division's dance card after they're done with Google.
 
brokenbiscuits [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 1:59:27 PM  
Is it stock buybacks? I bet it's stock buybacks. Zuckerbot likely greenlit stock buybacks.

That or they're going to sell even more of their users' personal data. Then stock buybacks.

/ ...
// Stock buybacks.
/// Christ, I'm stuck in a loop.
 
NewportBarGuy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-02 2:00:20 PM  
FOMO

They have missed this so much and now they plowed everything they have back into tech...

They found the lows and bought at the perfect time!!

...or did they?
 
Mr. Tweedy
2023-02-02 2:09:37 PM  
Third reason - because Wall Street is full of idiots who do waaaaaay too much cocaine
 
MusicMakeMyHeadPound [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-02-02 2:23:41 PM  
I've never watched Silicon Valley but that clip had me dying.
 
born_yesterday [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 2:25:51 PM  
Zuckerberg must have wowed them with that superfast android knife trick he stole from Aliens.
 
Koodz
2023-02-02 2:31:24 PM  

MusicMakeMyHeadPound: I've never watched Silicon Valley but that clip had me dying.


Farkers talked me into watching it last month and I finished the series last night. It's worth watching.
 
TedCruz'sCrazyDad
2023-02-02 2:47:48 PM  

brokenbiscuits: Is it stock buybacks? I bet it's stock buybacks. Zuckerbot likely greenlit stock buybacks.

That or they're going to sell even more of their users' personal data. Then stock buybacks.

/ ...
// Stock buybacks.
/// Christ, I'm stuck in a loop.


No it's cafeteria workers.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Bonzo_1116 [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 2:51:48 PM  

brokenbiscuits: Is it stock buybacks? I bet it's stock buybacks. Zuckerbot likely greenlit stock buybacks.

That or they're going to sell even more of their users' personal data. Then stock buybacks.

/ ...
// Stock buybacks.
/// Christ, I'm stuck in a loop.


There's no such thing as personal data anymore
 
Grand_Moff_Joseph [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 3:48:21 PM  
Is it because the market is completely delusional and disconnected from reality? That it's influenced by Jim Cramer and r/memestonks than actual data?
 
Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste [recently expired TotalFark]
2023-02-02 4:11:57 PM  
1. Because the investor class is exceedingly small and buried in massive amounts of money without anything to do with it. So they just make it rain on companies like Meta. If you haven't noticed, the economy, the stock market, the Fed, and any reasonable expectations of profit/loss, etc. are completely disconnected to reality by now.
 
brokenbiscuits [TotalFark]
2023-02-02 5:02:54 PM  

Bonzo_1116: brokenbiscuits: Is it stock buybacks? I bet it's stock buybacks. Zuckerbot likely greenlit stock buybacks.

That or they're going to sell even more of their users' personal data. Then stock buybacks.

/ ...
// Stock buybacks.
/// Christ, I'm stuck in a loop.

There's no such thing as personal data anymore


The European Union (and the UK to a lesser extent) would beg to differ. Person Data is a legal term in areas that care at least marginally more about individual rights than here in the US.
 
thedeathknell
2023-02-02 6:39:44 PM  
Needs higher hair...

Every Time Mark Zuckerberg says Higher Hair on Paradise PD Netflix Show Creepy Creeper Funny Short
Youtube JfvSuLaIsng
 
Craw Fu
2023-02-02 7:36:41 PM  

Koodz: MusicMakeMyHeadPound: I've never watched Silicon Valley but that clip had me dying.

Farkers talked me into watching it last month and I finished the series last night. It's worth watching.


I loved that show, so funny.  And if you ever worked in tech, a lot of it hit home.
 
jaytkay [OhFark]
2023-02-02 8:04:54 PM  

TedCruz'sCrazyDad: No it's cafeteria workers.


Take THAT, you fatcat cafeteria workers with your massive salaries, giant bonuses and obscene stock option gifts!
 
Displayed 15 of 15 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh comments
This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

If you like these links, you'll love

TotalFark

Come check out what's behind the curtain.

learn more | sign up
On Twitter

  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.