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(Slate)   Today's Slatesplanation: What real drag queens think about George Santos   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Law, Irony, Twitter, New York City, Hypocrisy, LGBT, Republican Party (United States), Culture  
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1248 clicks; posted to Politics » and Main » on 01 Feb 2023 at 5:30 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



39 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2023-02-01 9:19:06 AM  
Let's kick this off the usual way.

Lying Liar Jr.'s List of Lying Lies:

1. Claimed he graduated summa cum laude with a 3.89 GPA from Baruch college, who have no record of his attendance.
2. Claimed he graduated New York University, who also have no record of his attendance.
3. Claimed his parents sent him to Horace Mann prep school in the Bronx, who ... well, you know.
4. Claimed he was a volleyball star in college and "slayed" both Harvard and Yale teams.  Baruch doesn't play against either one.  This claim appears to have been cribbed directly from the resume of his former boss at LinkBridge Investors, Pablo Oliviera, who _was_ an All-American volleyball player at Baruch, where he also graduated.
5. Claimed he "sacrificed" both of his knees and got two "very nice" replacements because of his Volleyball days.
6. Claimed he worked for Goldman-Sachs and Citigroup, who have no record of his employment
7. Claimed he was both Jewish and Ukrainian with the historical family name Zabrovsky.
8. Claimed he was bi-racial, half black
9. Claimed he was the first openly gay non-incumbent republican elected to congress, yet divorced a woman in 2019
10. Claimed he lived with his husband and four dogs in Long Island; there is no marriage record of such
11. Claimed he committed no crimes in Brazil, despite Brazilian prosecutors investigating him for fraud
12. Claimed his mother was a white immigrant from Belgium and her family lived in Brazil for over a century
13. Claimed to have founded an animal charity called Friends of Pets United for which no records exist anywhere
14. Started a GoFundMe (as Anthony Zabrovski) for said charity, falsely claiming it was a 501(c)(3) nonprofit
15. Claimed he owned a number of rental properties
16. Claimed he was robbed of his rent money
17. Claimed 9/11 claimed his mother's life.  The mother who died in 2016
18. Lied about his campaign finances
19. Campaign staffers impersonated McQarthy staffers to elicit campaign donations
20. Claimed he was one of the first in the US to get COVID (** UPDATE: According to a Semafor investigation, the metadata in photos of him on a hospital gurney and of a positive COVID test at Elmhurst Hospital in Queens seem to support Santos' claim, so this may be true after all.)
21. Claimed to have voted on House bills dated before he was even sworn in
22. Claimed his grandmother was a holocaust survivor
23. Claimed he had employees who died in the Pulse shooting
24. Set up a company called DeVolder Organization, supposedly the source of his wealth, whose address was a closed medical office.  The address was changed to a PO box at a Mailboxes Etc.
25. Raised $3,000 in a GoFundMe (as Anthony DeVolder) to help a disabled, homeless vet's dog have a tumour removed. Kept the money, let the dog die.
26. Claims his mom, Fatima DeVolder, worked at the World Trade Center on 9/11.  Records show she wasn't even in the country at the time, and hadn't been since 1999; she didn't even apply for a US visa until 2003.
27. Denies being a drag queen pseudonymed "Kitara Ravache" in Brazil, though Brazilian drag queen Eula Rochard says she knew him personally as "Anthony DeVolder" and "Kitara."
28. Claimed he didn't have the money for his mother's funeral and petitioned Father Jose Carlos da Silva of Saint Rita's Catholic Church in Long Island City to help cover her funeral expenses.  A collection plate was passed for this purpose.  It is unknown how much was raised.  After the funeral he went skiing in the Poconos.  With the money he raised.
29. Started a GoFundMe (as Anthony DeVolder on behalf of Anthony D. Santos, as listed on the GoFundMe page) to also raise thousands for his mother's funeral expenses.  In case it wasn't obvious, Anthony D. Santos and Anthony DeVolder are both George.
30. Claimed on the Loud Majority show that he has had a "very extensive role in gas and oil in this country" and helped develop carbon capture technology thanks to his "many" trips to Moscow.
31. Claims he's 6'2", but photos show he's barely taller than Matt Gaetz, who's 5'7".
32. Claimed on the Brazilian podcast "Rádio Novelo Apresenta" that he was the victim of an assassination attempt.
33. Claimed on the same podcast that his Florida home was vandalized because of his political affiliation.
34. Claimed on the same podcast that he was mugged of his briefcase, watch, and shoes on 5th Ave. at 3pm after leaving his office with his purported husband that doesn't exist by two men who "weren't black, they were even white".
35. Edited his Wikipedia page (under the editor name Anthony Devolder) that he had acting roles on the Disney shows Hannah Montana and The Suite Life of Zack & Cody.
36. Further claimed in his Wiki edit that he had "taped" (acted, presumably) a movie in 2009 called The Invasion with "Uma Turman,Chris Odanald ,Melllisa George and Alicia Silver Stone" (His "spelling").  That movie came out in 2007 and starred Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig.
37. Even further claimed in his Wiki edit that he worked as a drag queen from age 17 and won several gay beauty pageants.  All of these edits were riddled with typos and spelling errors.
38. His election campaign listed several people as donors to his campaign who don't exist, including a few who lived at address that did not exist, either, such as "West Fingerboard Road" in New York.
39. Claimed he had a cancerous brain tumor, but, much like the poor soul who was turned into a newt by a witch, he got better.  There are no medical records to support this.
 
2023-02-01 1:13:27 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 2:43:09 PM  
The guy's so famous (or infamous) now...pretty soon they'll be actively recruiting blatant liars and crooks like George here.  It'll be a bonus for Republicans.  They'll even put it in writing.

The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.

.....


I'll just go now.
 
2023-02-01 3:53:46 PM  
Oh... Honey no...
 
2023-02-01 5:32:32 PM  

xanadian: The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.



Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 5:34:08 PM  
So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.
 
2023-02-01 5:34:37 PM  
The edgiest thing about George Santos are the shoulder pads in his ladies' blazer.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 5:34:43 PM  
As a red-blooded hetero manly man I will say that Santos is much more attractive as a woman.
 
2023-02-01 5:39:05 PM  
He does take a great shave.  If it's even necessary.
 
2023-02-01 5:39:34 PM  

foo monkey: The edgiest thing about George Santos are the shoulder pads in his ladies' blazer.

[Fark user image image 600x400]


I always pull the collar out over the sweater. Have I been doing it wrong this whole time. This is time sensitive by the way.
 
2023-02-01 5:42:30 PM  
That is not George Santos. His name might be Anthony DeVolder - or he might be Nelson Franklin running a long (and confusing) con.

sosyncd.comView Full Size


But we can almost certainly say that "George Santos" is not the name on his birf sertifikit.

// my first and last piece of evidence is that that's what he says his name is
 
2023-02-01 5:42:58 PM  

Psychopusher: Let's kick this off the usual way.

Lying Liar Jr.'s List of Lying Lies:

1. Claimed he graduated summa cum laude with a 3.89 GPA from Baruch college, who have no record of his attendance.
2. Claimed he graduated New York University, who also have no record of his attendance.
3. Claimed his parents sent him to Horace Mann prep school in the Bronx, who ... well, you know.
4. Claimed he was a volleyball star in college and "slayed" both Harvard and Yale teams.  Baruch doesn't play against either one.  This claim appears to have been cribbed directly from the resume of his former boss at LinkBridge Investors, Pablo Oliviera, who _was_ an All-American volleyball player at Baruch, where he also graduated.
5. Claimed he "sacrificed" both of his knees and got two "very nice" replacements because of his Volleyball days.
6. Claimed he worked for Goldman-Sachs and Citigroup, who have no record of his employment
7. Claimed he was both Jewish and Ukrainian with the historical family name Zabrovsky.
8. Claimed he was bi-racial, half black
9. Claimed he was the first openly gay non-incumbent republican elected to congress, yet divorced a woman in 2019
10. Claimed he lived with his husband and four dogs in Long Island; there is no marriage record of such
11. Claimed he committed no crimes in Brazil, despite Brazilian prosecutors investigating him for fraud
12. Claimed his mother was a white immigrant from Belgium and her family lived in Brazil for over a century
13. Claimed to have founded an animal charity called Friends of Pets United for which no records exist anywhere
14. Started a GoFundMe (as Anthony Zabrovski) for said charity, falsely claiming it was a 501(c)(3) nonprofit
15. Claimed he owned a number of rental properties
16. Claimed he was robbed of his rent money
17. Claimed 9/11 claimed his mother's life.  The mother who died in 2016
18. Lied about his campaign finances
19. Campaign staffers impersonated McQarthy staffers to elicit campaign donations
20. Claimed he was one of the first in the US to get COVID (** UPDATE: According to a Semafor investigation, the metadata in photos of him on a hospital gurney and of a positive COVID test at Elmhurst Hospital in Queens seem to support Santos' claim, so this may be true after all.)
21. Claimed to have voted on House bills dated before he was even sworn in
22. Claimed his grandmother was a holocaust survivor
23. Claimed he had employees who died in the Pulse shooting
24. Set up a company called DeVolder Organization, supposedly the source of his wealth, whose address was a closed medical office.  The address was changed to a PO box at a Mailboxes Etc.
25. Raised $3,000 in a GoFundMe (as Anthony DeVolder) to help a disabled, homeless vet's dog have a tumour removed. Kept the money, let the dog die.
26. Claims his mom, Fatima DeVolder, worked at the World Trade Center on 9/11.  Records show she wasn't even in the country at the time, and hadn't been since 1999; she didn't even apply for a US visa until 2003.
27. Denies being a drag queen pseudonymed "Kitara Ravache" in Brazil, though Brazilian drag queen Eula Rochard says she knew him personally as "Anthony DeVolder" and "Kitara."
28. Claimed he didn't have the money for his mother's funeral and petitioned Father Jose Carlos da Silva of Saint Rita's Catholic Church in Long Island City to help cover her funeral expenses.  A collection plate was passed for this purpose.  It is unknown how much was raised.  After the funeral he went skiing in the Poconos.  With the money he raised.
29. Started a GoFundMe (as Anthony DeVolder on behalf of Anthony D. Santos, as listed on the GoFundMe page) to also raise thousands for his mother's funeral expenses.  In case it wasn't obvious, Anthony D. Santos and Anthony DeVolder are both George.
30. Claimed on the Loud Majority show that he has had a "very extensive role in gas and oil in this country" and helped develop carbon capture technology thanks to his "many" trips to Moscow.
31. Claims he's 6'2", but photos show he's barely taller than Matt Gaetz, who's 5'7".
32. Claimed on the Brazilian podcast "Rádio Novelo Apresenta" that he was the victim of an assassination attempt.
33. Claimed on the same podcast that his Florida home was vandalized because of his political affiliation.
34. Claimed on the same podcast that he was mugged of his briefcase, watch, and shoes on 5th Ave. at 3pm after leaving his office with his purported husband that doesn't exist by two men who "weren't black, they were even white".
35. Edited his Wikipedia page (under the editor name Anthony Devolder) that he had acting roles on the Disney shows Hannah Montana and The Suite Life of Zack & Cody.
36. Further claimed in his Wiki edit that he had "taped" (acted, presumably) a movie in 2009 called The Invasion with "Uma Turman,Chris Odanald ,Melllisa George and Alicia Silver Stone" (His "spelling").  That movie came out in 2007 and starred Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig.
37. Even further claimed in his Wiki edit that he worked as a drag queen from age 17 and won several gay beauty pageants.  All of these edits were riddled with typos and spelling errors.
38. His election campaign listed several people as donors to his campaign who don't exist, including a few who lived at address that did not exist, either, such as "West Fingerboard Road" in New York.
39. Claimed he had a cancerous brain tumor, but, much like the poor soul who was turned into a newt by a witch, he got better.  There are no medical records to support this.


You're doing the Lord's work.
 
2023-02-01 5:43:44 PM  

Subtonic: foo monkey: The edgiest thing about George Santos are the shoulder pads in his ladies' blazer.

[Fark user image image 600x400]

I always pull the collar out over the sweater. Have I been doing it wrong this whole time. This is time sensitive by the way.


You're fine, just make sure you have collar stays in or starch the hell out of it.
 
2023-02-01 5:45:08 PM  
Also, did anyone interview Santos about what real drag queens think about Santos? He's a lot of fake things, but I believe he was actually a real drag queen.
 
2023-02-01 5:49:07 PM  
I read he was rejected by a guy on a dating app, so he made a profile with that guys picture and catfished people.

That's pretty psycho
 
2023-02-01 5:50:37 PM  

MattytheMouse: So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.


Ahem...

Fark user imageView Full Size


My favorite part is how she was so shocked at how unwelcome other MAGA assholes made her feel. Thoughts and prayers, Nazi.
 
2023-02-01 5:53:55 PM  

austerity101: MattytheMouse: So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.

Ahem...

[Fark user image 425x276]

My favorite part is how she was so shocked at how unwelcome other MAGA assholes made her feel. Thoughts and prayers, Nazi.


Okay, I'm out of the loop. Who is that?
 
2023-02-01 5:54:00 PM  
y.yarn.coView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 5:56:10 PM  

Ed Grubermann: austerity101: MattytheMouse: So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.

Ahem...

[Fark user image 425x276]

My favorite part is how she was so shocked at how unwelcome other MAGA assholes made her feel. Thoughts and prayers, Nazi.

Okay, I'm out of the loop. Who is that?


Okay, a brief bit o the Googles and... what an idiot!
 
2023-02-01 5:57:13 PM  

Ed Grubermann: austerity101: MattytheMouse: So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.

Ahem...

[Fark user image 425x276]

My favorite part is how she was so shocked at how unwelcome other MAGA assholes made her feel. Thoughts and prayers, Nazi.

Okay, I'm out of the loop. Who is that?


That's Lady MAGA. Read the sash!
 
2023-02-01 5:58:25 PM  

xanadian: The guy's so famous (or infamous) now...pretty soon they'll be actively recruiting blatant liars and crooks like George here.  It'll be a bonus for Republicans.  They'll even put it in writing.

The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 6:00:40 PM  

xanadian: The guy's so famous (or infamous) now...pretty soon they'll be actively recruiting blatant liars and crooks like George here.  It'll be a bonus for Republicans.  They'll even put it in writing.

The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.

.....


I'll just go now.


That was the movie starring Tim Allen, right? The one where if you kill George Santos, you become George Santos?
 
2023-02-01 6:01:32 PM  

MattytheMouse: So far, George Santos is the only problematic drag queen republicans have managed to find, which is why I'm proposing that kids shouldn't be allowed around George Santos.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 6:01:56 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 6:03:43 PM  

MattytheMouse: xanadian: The guy's so famous (or infamous) now...pretty soon they'll be actively recruiting blatant liars and crooks like George here.  It'll be a bonus for Republicans.  They'll even put it in writing.

The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.

.....


I'll just go now.

That was the movie starring Tim Allen, right? The one where if you kill George Santos, you become George Santos?


Wasn't that also the rule for the Dark One in Once? That "wish I was as good as Fables" show?
 
2023-02-01 6:05:15 PM  

xanadian: The guy's so famous (or infamous) now...pretty soon they'll be actively recruiting blatant liars and crooks like George here.  It'll be a bonus for Republicans.  They'll even put it in writing.

The written rule will be known as the Santos Clause.

.....


I'll just go now.


I like you, but
media0.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 6:09:20 PM  
Let them fight!
 
2023-02-01 6:14:04 PM  

Psychopusher: 27. Denies being a drag queen pseudonymed "Kitara Ravache" in Brazil, though Brazilian drag queen Eula Rochard says she knew him personally as "Anthony DeVolder" and "Kitara."


He was young and had fun at a festival.

Sue him for having a life!
 
2023-02-01 6:27:32 PM  
Who wants to have a brain tumor? WTF??? Yet this noob claimed to have one?
Ok...what's next on this guy's lie-o-rama of lies? I think he's gonna claim to be from the future to warn us about the past and whatnots....ooo-ga-boo-ga....
Alien abduction! President of inner Mongolia! Inventor of the Heart Lung machine! 12 Purple Hearts from Vietnam and Uzbekistan and outer Mongolia!
40 hole in ones at Mar a Dump-0!
Like, this could totally happen with this guy. Really.
 
2023-02-01 6:32:22 PM  

Mrtraveler01: Psychopusher: 27. Denies being a drag queen pseudonymed "Kitara Ravache" in Brazil, though Brazilian drag queen Eula Rochard says she knew him personally as "Anthony DeVolder" and "Kitara."

He was young and had fun at a festival.

Sue him for having a life!


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 6:32:30 PM  

Artist: Who wants to have a brain tumor? WTF??? Yet this noob claimed to have one?
Ok...what's next on this guy's lie-o-rama of lies? I think he's gonna claim to be from the future to warn us about the past and whatnots....ooo-ga-boo-ga....
Alien abduction! President of inner Mongolia! Inventor of the Heart Lung machine! 12 Purple Hearts from Vietnam and Uzbekistan and outer Mongolia!
40 hole in ones at Mar a Dump-0!
Like, this could totally happen with this guy. Really.


Wants? No.
Wants sympathy for allegedly having a brain tumor while trivializing what others go through? Oh, you betcha.
 
2023-02-01 6:33:08 PM  

palelizard: Also, did anyone interview Santos about what real drag queens think about Santos? He's a lot of fake things, but I believe he was actually a real drag queen.


We're beyond meta here.
 
2023-02-01 6:36:01 PM  

Dr Dreidel: That is not George Santos. His name might be Anthony DeVolder - or he might be Nelson Franklin running a long (and confusing) con.

[sosyncd.com image 400x310]

But we can almost certainly say that "George Santos" is not the name on his birf sertifikit.

// my first and last piece of evidence is that that's what he says his name is


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 7:32:44 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-02-01 7:50:18 PM  
Santos and the police pillow guy. Death match in the Octagon.
Sunday.
Sunday.
Sunday.
Followed by dragging MTG around the track at NASCAR at 200 MPH.
 
2023-02-01 8:25:12 PM  
Do you think Santos and Lindsey Graham trade makeup secrets?
 
2023-02-01 8:53:44 PM  
Santos is a joke but he would cut your throat if he believed doing so would get him what he wanted and he could get away with it.
 
2023-02-01 9:17:26 PM  

Vacation Bible School: Artist: Who wants to have a brain tumor? WTF??? Yet this noob claimed to have one?
Ok...what's next on this guy's lie-o-rama of lies? I think he's gonna claim to be from the future to warn us about the past and whatnots....ooo-ga-boo-ga....
Alien abduction! President of inner Mongolia! Inventor of the Heart Lung machine! 12 Purple Hearts from Vietnam and Uzbekistan and outer Mongolia!
40 hole in ones at Mar a Dump-0!
Like, this could totally happen with this guy. Really.

Wants? No.
Wants sympathy for allegedly having a brain tumor while trivializing what others go through? Oh, you betcha.


Aannndddd....grifting some sort of "fund raising" for the brain tumor he has.
 
2023-02-01 9:47:48 PM  
It's a shame this news broke on the anniversary of Kitara's Bat Mitzvah.
 
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