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(MSN)   Christians claim the Satanic Temple is using the supernatural to manipulate people   (msn.com) divider line
239
    More: Ironic, Religion, Prayer, Ritual, Belief, Witchcraft, Occult, Fasting, Satanism  
•       •       •

3331 clicks; posted to Politics » on 31 Jan 2023 at 10:25 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



239 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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unixpro [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 6:38:13 PM  
So are they.
 
raerae1980 [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 6:40:42 PM  
So help me gods, don't you go telling me Werewolves AND vampires exists!!
 
fragMasterFlash [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 6:49:59 PM  
I should have know Alien versus Predator was based on a true story.
 
aleister_greynight [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 7:01:59 PM  
So say your prayers and quit your biatching "Prayer Warriors."
 
IgG4 [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 7:07:23 PM  
Damn they are farcking stupid.
 
North_Central_Positronics [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 7:30:35 PM  
A guy coming back from the dead after three days to save your soul doesn't appear on their supernatural radar, I guess.
 
Demetrius [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 7:42:02 PM  
Yes. Yes we are.
 
Exile On Beale Street [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 7:59:33 PM  

Demetrius: Yes. Yes we are.


That's hilarious the way your avatar is right over it
 
Lorelle [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 8:16:01 PM  
"On the front door, they say, 'We call ourselves Satanists, but we don't serve Satan.' But then that's like a Christian saying, 'I'm a Christian, but I don't serve Jesus.' How can you be a Christian not serving Jesus? Either you have one master, or you have the other."


Over the past several years, I've noticed that most evangelical Christians worship Ol Pussygrabber instead of Jesus.
 
Earguy [recently expired TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 8:41:08 PM  
WILL NOT CLICK ON FOX LINK
 
Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 9:18:52 PM  
You know, I have absolutely zero interest in SatanCon. It sounds very stupid, like a Mensa gathering for people who measure their self-worth by edginess instead of IQ. But I'd rather spend a week attending SatanCon workshops and pretending to be interested in whatever they have to say than in even setting foot in any sort of evangelical church, so I guess that's something to consider.
 
hubiestubert [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 9:38:09 PM  
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Bootleg [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 9:43:39 PM  
I thought they finally ended that show.

/Only got to season 6.
 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 10:12:14 PM  

North_Central_Positronics: A guy coming back from the dead after three days to save your soul doesn't appear on their supernatural radar, I guess.


Never underestimate the capacity of the faithful for cognitive dissonance.
 
FormlessOne
2023-01-31 10:26:37 PM  
Christians claim a lot of shiat. Like, for example, that they're Christians.
 
drewsfarkthrowaway
2023-01-31 10:28:41 PM  
These assholes are lucky to remember to breathe, even if it's out of their mouths.
 
FormlessOne
2023-01-31 10:30:08 PM  

Lorelle: "On the front door, they say, 'We call ourselves Satanists, but we don't serve Satan.' But then that's like a Christian saying, 'I'm a Christian, but I don't serve Jesus.' How can you be a Christian not serving Jesus? Either you have one master, or you have the other."


Over the past several years, I've noticed that most evangelical Christians worship Ol Pussygrabber instead of Jesus.


I love the "you're either a Christian or a Satanist" bit, as though there isn't a third, fourth, or eleven-hundredth choice.

Emo Philips does come to mind.

Emo Philips - Joke on Religion
Youtube ANNX_XiuA78
 
Mad-n-FL
2023-01-31 10:30:12 PM  
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0822847/
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:30:17 PM  
"Here, eat this bread. It is literally the flesh of a guy who died 2000 years ago, go ahead and wash iat down with some of His blood."
 
The Lone Gunman
2023-01-31 10:30:41 PM  
"You're just a troll"

These words were spoken by Tucker Carlson. To someone else. Someone who is not also Tucker Carlson.
 
Ragin' Asian [recently expired TotalFark]
2023-01-31 10:31:13 PM  
If your god is omnipotent, surely he would stop this blasphemy. You obviously didn't pray sufficiently hard to earn enough faith bucks.
 
Hickory-smoked
2023-01-31 10:31:35 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Stoker
2023-01-31 10:32:20 PM  
What, you can't compete biatches?
 
Hell Poodle
2023-01-31 10:34:16 PM  
The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.
 
monsatano [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-31 10:34:16 PM  

raerae1980: So help me gods, don't you go telling me Werewolves AND vampires exists!!


I saw a documentary about that years ago. They both have a thing for brunettes was my takeaway.
 
Nick el Ass
2023-01-31 10:34:38 PM  
After School Satan Club song.

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0428/0465/files/assc-video.mp4?v=1645628021
 
Fart_Machine
2023-01-31 10:34:38 PM  
Tucker calling someone a troll.

Oh wow.
 
towatchoverme
2023-01-31 10:36:09 PM  
Christians are doing some hard work turning people away from God all by themselves. You'd think they'd be thankful for some help.
 
Gergesa
2023-01-31 10:38:06 PM  
s.yimg.comView Full Size
 
Jim_Callahan
2023-01-31 10:38:19 PM  
I mean, they're a religion, so... yes?

Admittedly a religion that started exclusively as a means to troll Christianity's more excitable/stupid members, and honestly is still pretty much half about that, but it's not like that disqualifies it as a religion or prevents it from doing normal religion things like using the supernatural to manipulate its members for profit or control.
 
farkitallletitend
2023-01-31 10:39:32 PM  

Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.


We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:43:13 PM  

Jim_Callahan: I mean, they're a religion, so... yes?

Admittedly a religion that started exclusively as a means to troll Christianity's more excitable/stupid members, and honestly is still pretty much half about that, but it's not like that disqualifies it as a religion or prevents it from doing normal religion things like using the supernatural to manipulate its members for profit or control.


They are only a religion for tax and legal purposes. There is nothing supernatural about them.
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:44:33 PM  

farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.


Christians have free will but everything that happens is part of God's plan. Makes sense if you don't think about it.
 
Nick el Ass
2023-01-31 10:47:27 PM  

farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.


Idiots are just idiots and there is no such thing as god/Satan.
 
BMulligan
2023-01-31 10:51:13 PM  

jst3p: "Here, eat this bread. It is literally the flesh of a guy who died 2000 years ago, go ahead and wash iat down with some of His blood."


I thought it was only the Catholics who still believed in literal trans-substantiation. Is that wrong?

/ lapsed Catholic
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:53:36 PM  

BMulligan: jst3p: "Here, eat this bread. It is literally the flesh of a guy who died 2000 years ago, go ahead and wash iat down with some of His blood."

I thought it was only the Catholics who still believed in literal trans-substantiation. Is that wrong?

/ lapsed Catholic


I am pretty sure that is the case there might be some other obscure denominations., I was just going for low hanging fruit. Keep in mind "only the Catholics" is ~1.3 billion people.
 
Epicedion
2023-01-31 10:54:41 PM  

jst3p: farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.

Christians have free will but everything that happens is part of God's plan. Makes sense if you don't think about it.


Free will doesn't make sense whether you believe in God or not. If you want to argue with that point it's only because that's what was always going to happen
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:55:05 PM  

Gergesa: [s.yimg.com image 640x375]


I really liked the first three seasons of that show then I had no desire to pick it up again. I am not sure why, but he really played the role well.
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 10:55:42 PM  

Epicedion: jst3p: farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.

Christians have free will but everything that happens is part of God's plan. Makes sense if you don't think about it.

Free will doesn't make sense whether you believe in God or not. If you want to argue with that point it's only because that's what was always going to happen


I knew someone was going to say that.
 
foo monkey
2023-01-31 10:57:07 PM  
It's times like this I wish iat were Friday.
 
foo monkey
2023-01-31 10:57:58 PM  
Satanists are messing with real spiritual forces despite what they claim.

You can't logic with people who think faith equals fact.
 
BMulligan
2023-01-31 10:58:21 PM  

jst3p: BMulligan: jst3p: "Here, eat this bread. It is literally the flesh of a guy who died 2000 years ago, go ahead and wash iat down with some of His blood."

I thought it was only the Catholics who still believed in literal trans-substantiation. Is that wrong?

/ lapsed Catholic

I am pretty sure that is the case there might be some other obscure denominations., I was just going for low hanging fruit. Keep in mind "only the Catholics" is ~1.3 billion people.


True enough. And no other faith has a figurehead who dresses as sharp as Father Frank does. He's too sexy for his cassock.
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 11:01:51 PM  

monsatano: raerae1980: So help me gods, don't you go telling me Werewolves AND vampires exists!!

I saw a documentary about that years ago. They both have a thing for brunettes was my takeaway.


I recently learned from a very wise sage that a werewolf can kill a vampire.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 11:02:25 PM  

Nick el Ass: farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.

Idiots are just idiots and there is no such thing as god/Satan.


Lucifer is going to smite you for that.
 
thisisyourbrainonFark
2023-01-31 11:02:40 PM  
Sexy devil thread?

yournextshoes.comView Full Size

media0.giphy.comView Full Size

gifdb.comView Full Size
 
ZMugg [TotalFark]
2023-01-31 11:04:51 PM  
They could manipulate me with this:
th.bing.comView Full Size

... easily.
 
hlehmann
2023-01-31 11:05:02 PM  
People that like to proclaim that they're Christians tend to be garbage people.  Prove me wrong.
 
Sexy Jesus [recently expired TotalFark]
2023-01-31 11:05:13 PM  
The most dangerous of all enthroned lies is the holy, the sanctified, the privileged lie- the lie everyone believes to be a model truth. It is the fruitful mother of all other popular errors and delusions. It is a hydra-headed tree of unreason with a thousand roots. It is a social cancer!
 ---Anton LaVey
 
jst3p
2023-01-31 11:06:55 PM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: Sexy devil thread?

[yournextshoes.com image 850x537]
[media0.giphy.com image 400x224] [View Full Size image _x_]
[gifdb.com image 683x500] [View Full Size image _x_]


Does she count as a devil?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
thisisyourbrainonFark
2023-01-31 11:06:57 PM  

Nick el Ass: farkitallletitend: Hell Poodle: The christian paradox where your god is so powerful and mighty, but he can't protect you from a secular organization meeting with each other.

We have free will so all the God is going to save you crap is just that. Crap.There's no paradox. He doesn't fix stupid because you have free will. No mask and died of Covid? It wasn't God's will. You're an idiot. He loves idiots.

Idiots are just idiots and there is no such thing as god/Satan.


But there is

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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