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(Mental Floss)   Let's fire up the Wayback Machine and return to a simpler time when television celebrities would battle one another on camera for our gladiatorial entertainment   (mentalfloss.com) divider line
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    More: Vintage, National Basketball Association, Battle of the Network Stars, CBS, NBC, David Letterman, Pepperdine University, Olympic Games, TV Guide  
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1730 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 29 Jan 2023 at 12:12 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



41 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
Wanebo [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-29 11:00:10 AM  
Many a young libido was stirred when Lynda Carter jumped up on the swimmers starting block, hooked her thumbs under her suit next to her boobs, and adjusted her swimsuit by pulling if forward and away from her body and then letting it snap back into place.
 
edmo [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-29 11:36:30 AM  

Wanebo: Many a young libido was stirred when Lynda Carter jumped up on the swimmers starting block, hooked her thumbs under her suit next to her boobs, and adjusted her swimsuit by pulling if forward and away from her body and then letting it snap back into place.


Seconded
 
RolandTGunner [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 11:37:45 AM  
SNL T's and A's
Youtube y0f1Ywnjq0A
 
FlashHarry [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 12:16:54 PM  

Wanebo: Many a young libido was stirred when Lynda Carter jumped up on the swimmers starting block, hooked her thumbs under her suit next to her boobs, and adjusted her swimsuit by pulling if forward and away from her body and then letting it snap back into place.


Remember it like it was yesterday. Those unlined Speedo suits were just... outstanding.
 
FlashHarry [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 12:19:37 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
oldfarthenry [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 12:35:11 PM  
Thanks - I needed a "retro-bone" today!
 
rhondajeremy
2023-01-29 12:48:25 PM  
Watched the Weird Al segment recently. Impressive but so dangerous (he says so too)

//My favorite story: Gabrielle Carteris was rehearsing an episode with Alfonso Ribero and hugged him after the stunt was done. She was told by producers she was not to hug him after the stunt when they were on live TV because middle America doesn't like to see a black man and a white woman hug. So she told Alfonso what was said to her and when they were live, they kissed each other instead. 👏👏👏👏
 
Magnus Eisengrim
2023-01-29 12:51:46 PM  

FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]


Welcome Back Kotter!!!
 
Blathering Idjut
2023-01-29 12:57:50 PM  
The networks found a way to put their hottest female stars in a dunk tank on camera and somehow it's all of us that need to be chastised for it?
 
Hots_Kebabs [BareFark]
2023-01-29 1:09:46 PM  
"I believe the Battle of the Network Stars should be fought with guns."

some poor black child that was definitely not a bum or St Louis
 
TedCruz'sCrazyDad
2023-01-29 1:10:40 PM  

Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!


How did he not end up in pornos?
 
drewogatory
2023-01-29 1:19:14 PM  

TedCruz'sCrazyDad: Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!

How did he not end up in pornos?


Ron Jeremy was young then and there can be only one.
 
PvtStash
2023-01-29 1:22:39 PM  
yeah but it was way more truth in advertising when they did

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circus_of_the_Stars

you know, entertainment acts like what they know good already. ;)
 
Your_Huckleberry
2023-01-29 1:23:41 PM  

FlashHarry: [Fark user image image 500x337]


I'd say there's no doubt who actually won those Battles of the Network Stars.
 
MurphyMurphy
2023-01-29 1:28:50 PM  
imgs.search.brave.comView Full Size
 
Your_Huckleberry
2023-01-29 1:28:54 PM  

TedCruz'sCrazyDad: Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!

How did he not end up in pornos?


Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.


Also, back to Lynda Carter, I think they ran "in depth profile" segments on her a lot during those shows. Mostly her working out or dancing or doing gymnastics. Stretches and bounces and bends and running..... With Howard Costello leering.
At least, that's how I remember it.
 
Your_Huckleberry
2023-01-29 1:29:42 PM  

Your_Huckleberry: TedCruz'sCrazyDad: Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!

How did he not end up in pornos?

Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.


Also, back to Lynda Carter, I think they ran "in depth profile" segments on her a lot during those shows. Mostly her working out or dancing or doing gymnastics. Stretches and bounces and bends and running..... With Howard Costello leering.
At least, that's how I remember it.


Cosell. Not Costello.
 
darkman2000
2023-01-29 1:54:17 PM  
The Simon Says games were a comedic break from the competition.


We've already covered the best reason to watch the show, I just thought I'd keep the conversation going
 
darkman2000
2023-01-29 1:54:59 PM  
The Simon Says games were a fun comedic break from the competition.


We've already covered the best reason to watch the show, I just thought I'd keep the conversation going
 
Pants full of macaroni!! [BareFark]
2023-01-29 2:00:20 PM  
Honk Bag.  Now, more than ever.
 
LindenFark
2023-01-29 2:01:15 PM  
The original was a clever and successful bit of marketing.

Whoever thought a reboot in 2017 was a good idea given the modern landscape of television programming, hopefully has found a new career by now.
 
pounddawg
2023-01-29 2:32:52 PM  

FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]


si.comView Full Size


eyes forward
imagesvc.meredithcorp.ioView Full Size
 
Exile On Beale Street [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-29 2:33:56 PM  

Blathering Idjut: The networks found a way to put their hottest female stars in a dunk tank on camera and somehow it's all of us that need to be chastised for it?


metro.co.ukView Full Size
 
Exile On Beale Street [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-29 2:35:37 PM  

Your_Huckleberry: TedCruz'sCrazyDad: Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!

How did he not end up in pornos?

Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.


Also, back to Lynda Carter, I think they ran "in depth profile" segments on her a lot during those shows. Mostly her working out or dancing or doing gymnastics. Stretches and bounces and bends and running..... With Howard Costello leering.
At least, that's how I remember it.


SNL Digital Short: Body Fuzion - SNL
Youtube 5qkrR9yTsbs
 
peachpicker
2023-01-29 3:00:50 PM  

Your_Huckleberry: TedCruz'sCrazyDad: Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!

How did he not end up in pornos?

Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.


Also, back to Lynda Carter, I think they ran "in depth profile" segments on her a lot during those shows. Mostly her working out or dancing or doing gymnastics. Stretches and bounces and bends and running..... With Howard Costello leering.
At least, that's how I remember it.


I've always loved this clip. Kaplan getting smooched up by Lynda Carter and then flat out embarrassing Conrad, Telly Savalas puffing on a cig, Penny Marshall and Ron Howard hopping around like excited kids, Cosell oozing 'Farrah, baby, I'm not in charge of the rules committee!...'

Battle of the Network Stars - Robert Conrad vs. Gabe Kaplan
Youtube VSw2cFXx44g
 
Russell_Secord
2023-01-29 3:11:05 PM  
"Battle of the Network Stars"--at once the apex and the death knell of Jiggle TV.
 
The_Sponge [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 5:01:23 PM  
Held on the campus of my alma mater.

Also:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
fluffy_pope
2023-01-29 5:28:49 PM  
The SCTV version
 
farkingbubbler [OhFark]
2023-01-29 7:19:22 PM  

FlashHarry: [Fark user image image 500x337]


Gabe's thinking that he had less hair on his lips than... y'know.
 
brigid_fitch
2023-01-29 7:47:17 PM  

Your_Huckleberry: Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.


Holy cats, I remember that!  They had an impromptu race on the beach there.  They were team captains for the relay race & Kaplan's team won.  Conrad's team could have won, but Conrad pushed his own teammate down on the track, something he'd done to other female stars, to cover up his own bad performance in the race.  His team was disqualified and he flew into a temper tantrum (remember, Kaplan had already won.  The disqualification didn't change that) and bullied Kaplan into the race...that he subsequently lost.
 
whither_apophis [TotalFark]
2023-01-29 8:01:08 PM  
huh, safe for network tv, not safe for Fark
 
SoundOfOneHandWanking [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-29 8:19:05 PM  

RolandTGunner: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/y0f1Ywnjq0A]


I saw this the first time it came on, I wasn't sure if it was a real commercial or not
 
Truthman
2023-01-29 8:23:45 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

You a tough guy?
I'm a tough guy.
 
Your_Huckleberry
2023-01-29 9:07:57 PM  

Truthman: [Fark user image 425x318]
You a tough guy?
I'm a tough guy.


I thought the best line in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood was Al Pacino's character  referencing "Bob Conrad and his tight pants"
The guy certainly wore some tight britches on Wild, Wild, West.
 
Billy Liar
2023-01-29 9:22:31 PM  

brigid_fitch: Your_Huckleberry: Wasn't he actually pretty good in those competitions? I remember him and Robert Conrad having some sort of feud. Kaolin destroyed him in a race to settle everything, I think.

Holy cats, I remember that!  They had an impromptu race on the beach there.  They were team captains for the relay race & Kaplan's team won.  Conrad's team could have won, but Conrad pushed his own teammate down on the track, something he'd done to other female stars, to cover up his own bad performance in the race.  His team was disqualified and he flew into a temper tantrum (remember, Kaplan had already won.  The disqualification didn't change that) and bullied Kaplan into the race...that he subsequently lost.


"Holy Cats"???
Who are you, Dan  Duryea, fer cat's sake?  B-)

Scarlet Street 1945 Joan Bennett Dan Duryea Then you're on Easy Street
Youtube qOn4gz-NmdY
 
apathy2673
2023-01-29 10:03:29 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

pbs.twimg.comView Full Size

1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

Mr Kotter is tougher, Bobby boy
 
thespindrifter
2023-01-30 6:31:30 AM  
I seem to recall not only Linda Carter in various Speedo swimsuits, but a hot hot hot Erin Grey.
 
FlashHarry [TotalFark]
2023-01-30 8:51:11 AM  

Magnus Eisengrim: FlashHarry: [Fark user image 500x337] [View Full Size image _x_]

Welcome Back Kotter!!!


Welcome back Boner, more like!
 
Mithraic_bullshiat
2023-01-30 10:33:10 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Same era, slightly later in the evening, was 1979s Roller Disco Party at the Playboy Mansion. I get a fever and a rash just watching it: do check out Wayland Flowers trying to offer a spite BJ to the very uninterested Jim Brown via a mammy doll version of Madame while the Village People play. I can't get the timestamp to  work, it's at 40:16. Check out that straw action:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=7NMZxIouKhU&list=PL3jQKy0gEk1q9wmUsbdg3KaZWUob0_x5D&index=25&t=40:16
 
knbwhite
2023-01-30 3:58:23 PM  

Exile On Beale Street: Blathering Idjut: The networks found a way to put their hottest female stars in a dunk tank on camera and somehow it's all of us that need to be chastised for it?

[metro.co.uk image 480x288]


The Popsicle twins, God, where are they now. And did they ever lose their enthusiasm (get married).
 
morg
2023-01-30 6:51:44 PM  
I liked it but I also liked a lot of shows that don't hold up in retrospect. Looking at you, "Magnum PI" and "mork and Mindy"
 
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