Electric Grid improvements are probably immune because, well, where is the fun in that?  We all know Good Texans are of the bootstrappy-rugged-individualist sort, so why not dupe them into helping reduce the strain on the Grid and eventually enrich the lives of us all at the same time?

It is my position a $32 billion rollout of these babies would instantaneously result in a paradigm shift.  A rural setting would once again be cool, mass shootings would sharply decline (duels would take place on private land, away from population centers), and the ten gallon hat market would skyrocket.  There would be a steep increase in cool band names trying to one-up "Segways in Texas."  Those newly formed bands would not only practice, but also perform, on the spacious porches on every property.  It would be a statewide block party (with built-in social distancing) inevitably leading to spontaneous discoveries.  Republicans would subsequently fully support funding the arts, creativity would blossom and what a wonderful world it would be.  All thanks to Segways in Texas.

Full disclosure:  I have been drinking tonight and shall at once see myself out.