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(Twitter)   Now THAT's how you announce you're running for President   (twitter.com) divider line
125
    More: Awkward, shot  
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6028 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Jan 2023 at 3:10 AM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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Original [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 1:24:13 AM  
Original Tweet:
 
AirForceVet [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 2:12:35 AM  
She probably wasn't too keen on his idea.
 
Tanqueray [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 2:24:34 AM  
media0.giphy.comView Full Size
 
Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste
2023-01-27 2:24:43 AM  
"Holy shiat I'm married to this guy."
 
Alphax
2023-01-27 2:25:38 AM  
Never heard of him.  But a Republican talking about 'keeping every American safe' while his wife collapses seems very on the nose after the end of Roe v Wade.
 
oa330_man [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 2:31:46 AM  
The human race is here for one reason, and one reason only.

Somewhere, someone has uttered those magical words - "I want me some of that."

/would you like to see some pictures of my cats is a close second
 
Ishkur [OhFark]
2023-01-27 3:14:30 AM  
Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.
 
Joe_diGriz [BareFark]
2023-01-27 3:17:22 AM  
The best part in the video is that you can see his brain going from "Who's interrupting me with that noise?" to "Oh, the flag fell over" to "Uh... honey? Can you be more careful?" to "Oh, well, Bob has got her" and then getting stuck in a loop for a few seconds between "I should continue" and "I should help", before finally stopping on "I'm going to get in trouble if I don't at least go over there, aren't I?"
 
Gordon Bennett [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 3:17:56 AM  

Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.


Rollan Roberts. You probably know him as the guy whose pregnant wife passed out while he was announcing his candidacy for President.
 
Burn_The_Plows
2023-01-27 3:18:47 AM  
I hope they properly disposed of the American flag that touched the floor.
 
shinji3i
2023-01-27 3:26:41 AM  
He's a republican so farkem but

media.tenor.comView Full Size


At least he went over to check on his wife instead of giving up and working the phone banks for fainting.
 
Ragin' Asian [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 3:28:41 AM  
He just kind of moseys over. If I saw my partner collapsed on the floor, I'd be running toward them.
 
Exception Collection
2023-01-27 3:38:59 AM  
Oh!  He's Manchin's partner in keeping West Virginia dirty.
 
Ganon D. Mire
2023-01-27 3:39:45 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
NewportBarGuy [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 3:43:00 AM  

Burn_The_Plows: I hope they properly disposed of the American flag that touched the floor.


Yeah, they turned it into a pair of shorts and a bikini. As per usual.
 
wademh
2023-01-27 3:44:12 AM  

Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.


He should have rushed over and grabbed the flag before it touched the ground, hugged it, and sent an aid to see if his wife was okay to be moved so he could return to his speech.
 
MaudlinMutantMollusk [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 3:47:59 AM  
She couldn't believe that dumb motherf*cker thinking he could win
 
monsatano [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 3:54:43 AM  

Burn_The_Plows: I hope they properly disposed of the American flag that touched the floor.


They used it to wrap the baby, because it was stillborn
 
DoctorCal
2023-01-27 3:55:33 AM  
President Braxton Hicks
 
thisisyourbrainonFark
2023-01-27 3:55:54 AM  
Bury the mother of your children in a golf course like a true American hero.
 
DoctorCal
2023-01-27 4:03:43 AM  

Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.


It's Twitter. Every single one is a moron.
 
ArcadianRefugee
2023-01-27 4:12:02 AM  

Ragin' Asian: He just kind of moseys over. If I saw my partner collapsed on the floor, I'd be running toward them.


Yeah. First he just stands there gawping for like 5 seconds, then just casually saunters over like "Hey, what are you folks up to?"
 
andrewagill [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 4:16:46 AM  
I wouldn't trust anyone named Rollan after what happened last time

img.timeinc.netView Full Size
 
DORMAMU
2023-01-27 4:21:23 AM  
wearing high heels like those while pregnant?  just thinking about that makes me want to pass out
 
Ishkur [OhFark]
2023-01-27 4:23:08 AM  

Gordon Bennett: Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.

Rollan Roberts. You probably know him as the guy whose pregnant wife passed out while he was announcing his candidacy for President.


giantbomb.comView Full Size
 
EddieMoscone
2023-01-27 4:44:47 AM  

monsatano: Burn_The_Plows: I hope they properly disposed of the American flag that touched the floor.

They used it to wrap the baby, because it was stillborn


That poor flag, touching a stillborn like that. AND the ground.

Oh man, Republican Jesus is gonna get us for sure!
 
Testiclaw
2023-01-27 4:55:21 AM  
Honestly, in the world of TikTok and Faceyspace and Internet Live...if I was doing something public like this and my farking wife collapses, I'd just stand there, knowing 1) whatever venture I had planned was now DOA and 2) this is going on the interwebs...forever.

I can't imagine the feeling of absolute defeat.
 
Odin's Other Eye
2023-01-27 5:03:41 AM  

Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts


Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)
 
bloobeary [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2023-01-27 5:03:43 AM  
She collapsed and took down the flag with the gold fringe.
THIS MEANS SOMETHING.
( 🎶 spooky x-files music 🎶 )
 
Hey Nurse! [OhFark]
2023-01-27 5:21:48 AM  

Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.


And after that, you never will again...except maybe on Fark
 
Phaedrus the Vague
2023-01-27 5:28:47 AM  
The Twitterati have finally triumphed over the Illuminati. The Ill's probably tried but failed to un-woken II's wife with a poison dart.

As President of the United States, I will Twitterize federal agencies (run better with less people).-- RR II
 
Monkeyfark Ridiculous
2023-01-27 5:33:21 AM  

Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really.

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)


Maybe his last name is Il as in Kim Il Sung.
 
Bigdogdaddy
2023-01-27 5:34:23 AM  

Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)


But only if your first, middle and last name are exact
 
Albus Grundledore
2023-01-27 5:41:46 AM  

Bigdogdaddy: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

But only if your first, middle and last name are exact


> But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

Why would anybody name their child "Exact Exact Exact"?!
 
tembaarmswide [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 5:45:12 AM  
power of god!!
 
Phaedrus the Vague
2023-01-27 5:45:40 AM  
I was reading his wiki page, saw this. . .
Rollan A. Roberts is an American politician and pastor serving as a Republican member of the West Virginia Senate[1] for the 9th district. He assumed office on January 9, 2019.

and of course I thought, WV Senate in 2019, and now running for prez-- wow, that's ambitious and hilarious.

But, no, that's his dad, number I. He's drafting off his dad. More pathetic than funny at this point.
 
Phaedrus the Vague
2023-01-27 5:47:25 AM  

Albus Grundledore: Bigdogdaddy: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

> But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

Why would anybody name their child "Exact Exact Exact"?!


Major Major Major Major.
 
Knight without armor
2023-01-27 5:49:18 AM  

Albus Grundledore: Bigdogdaddy: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

> But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

Why would anybody name their child "Exact Exact Exact"?!


A joke? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_Major_Major_Major
 
The Third Man [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 5:49:43 AM  

andrewagill: I wouldn't trust anyone named Rollan after what happened last time

[img.timeinc.net image 611x404]


I don't know...barricading yourself in a hotel room after taking a maid as a hostage at least qualifies as something newsworthy.  I hate to think of what this guy's been up to behind closed doors.
 
Knight without armor
2023-01-27 5:49:59 AM  

Phaedrus the Vague: Albus Grundledore: Bigdogdaddy: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

> But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

Why would anybody name their child "Exact Exact Exact"?!

Major Major Major Major.


Ugh. Ya got me.
 
vrax
2023-01-27 5:50:44 AM  

Ishkur: Everyone in the comments is complaining that he didn't go over to help her fast enough. Like what was he supposed to do, zip over and catch her before she fell like he's the god damn Flash? I think it was shock more than anything that took him at first.

Anyway: Who is this guy? Never heard of him.


mkgifs.comView Full Size

See!  That's how you do it.
 
Phaedrus the Vague
2023-01-27 5:53:16 AM  

Knight without armor: Phaedrus the Vague: Albus Grundledore: Bigdogdaddy: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

> But only if your first, middle and last name are exact

Why would anybody name their child "Exact Exact Exact"?!

Major Major Major Major.

Ugh. Ya got me.


Another feather in my cap!
 
phaseolus
2023-01-27 6:05:07 AM  

Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)


and IIIs who go by "Trey" are assholes
 
tembaarmswide [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 6:07:32 AM  

Monkeyfark Ridiculous: Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really.

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)

Maybe his last name is Il as in Kim Il Sung.


Not sure if serious.......

Why so serious?
 
Eravior
2023-01-27 6:08:07 AM  

Odin's Other Eye: Gordon Bennett: Rollan Roberts

Ahem. Rollan Roberts II. Who apparently is a... uh... hard to tell really. 

(I HATE it when people use "II" - if there are just 2 of you, you're a Jr., junior.)


Pope John Paul, Jr? Works for me.

/Would have posted a minute earlier but I noticed the lowercase r and the question mark appear to be touching.
//r?r?r?r?r?
///Now I'm wondering about other letter, number, punctuation combinations...
 
DarnoKonrad
2023-01-27 6:14:35 AM  
There's something wrong when you're pregnant and feel the need to wear high heels.
 
Lonestar
2023-01-27 6:18:41 AM  

DarnoKonrad: There's something wrong when you're pregnant and feel the need to wear high heels.


We will never know for sure, but probably the wearing of the heels wasnt her idea.
 
jaytkay [OhFark]
2023-01-27 6:24:19 AM  
The home town newspaper knows nothing about him outside his press release.

State senator's son to announce run for president
Jan 17, 2023

charleston, w.va. - West Virginia native Rollan Roberts, son of Sen. Rollan Roberts, R-Raleigh, 9th District, will be announcing his candidacy for president of the United States.
Roberts has worked in diplomacy at the national and international level.
The announcement is set for 1 p.m. Friday, Jan. 20, at the State Capitol ground floor Rotunda.
 
labman [TotalFark]
2023-01-27 6:25:50 AM  
What I want to know is why didn't the pool boy who knocked up his wife run and keep her from falling?   I mean, of course this guy didn't do anything. He just likes to watch, anyway.
 
A Room Full of Angry Raccoons
2023-01-27 6:26:08 AM  
IS THE FETUS OKAY?!

We need it to be born & join the workforce.
 
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