CSB:  My two best friends were driving to a Dead show in Maine in the 1980s, as they came around a twisting mountainous road, suddenly moose!  The car came to a stop perilously close to the edge of the ravine, and the driver looked to his right to see if his passenger was OK but the moose had caved in the windhield next to him and all he could see was bloody fur and flesh and jellied moose.  Meanwhile the passenger looked to his right to check on the driver and all he could see was the moose carcass that had cratered the front and roof of the car.  They both staggered out of their doors, which were completely untouched, and saw each other over the hood of the car to their great relief.  Just then a legit VW microbus pulled over next to them (It was the 80s, there were still plenty of those around) and a big hippie mama came rushing towards them with her arms wide open.  They both thought some variation of "Oh yes, big mama love, that'd be great right now!"  but she ran right past them and threw herself on the dead moose, on the car hood, weeping and trying to help its spiritual journey begin or some such hippie shiat.

/totally true, they even brought back shiatty pics from their instamatic to show off in school, as well as some not-entirely-bad weed from the Oxford Speedway show.

*passenger looked left.

/obviously.