Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Twitter)   Suddenly, there was an spike in car break-ins, and nobody could understand why   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, shot  
•       •       •

7121 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2023 at 8:20 AM (11 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



119 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2023-01-24 7:34:51 AM  
Original Tweet:

 
2023-01-24 7:35:19 AM  
"Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"
 
2023-01-24 7:51:51 AM  

OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"


I *know* how to play lawn darts, Rod.
 
2023-01-24 7:57:42 AM  
I think he's too late.  That child isn't moving.
 
2023-01-24 8:09:53 AM  
This was like when the cops came to school for DARE and told us how to buy and do drugs.
 
2023-01-24 8:11:23 AM  

OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"


You do know that for, more or less, the same amount of money as the two plungers and the roll of painter's tape, you could buy an emergency escape hammer for your car and just go around smashing people's windows in.

Because no one wants to stand around for 5 minutes jimmying something when you could just smash and grab
 
2023-01-24 8:24:50 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:26:03 AM  
This lifehack will get people of colt shot by cops.
 
2023-01-24 8:26:09 AM  
The fastest way to break into a car is to tap the back window with a pointed hammer. It's 100 times faster than this method and nobody reports it.
 
2023-01-24 8:26:56 AM  
Dr. Cox?
 
2023-01-24 8:27:38 AM  
This might work if the kid was locked in a car in the Home Depot parking lot.

Good luck if it's at Nordstrom.
 
2023-01-24 8:29:25 AM  

OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"


media.wfaa.comView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:29:31 AM  
People who care about stealth just go around trying the door. Plenty of unlocked cars to steal from.

People who don't care will just smash the window.

There are plenty of other ways to open locked car doors. You think those tow truck drivers are all MIT grads? No. It's trivial to open locked car doors.
 
2023-01-24 8:30:19 AM  
Break the damned glass.
 
2023-01-24 8:32:20 AM  
This is great news for when you leave your infant in an untethered car seat in the front of the car
 
2023-01-24 8:32:41 AM  
For people who can't be bothered lugging around plungers

https://www.amazon.com/Kaisiking-Aluminum-Suction-Lifting-Laminate/dp/B08D6GC7PC/
 
2023-01-24 8:33:06 AM  
Ehhh, is nobody going to mention this is clearly fake?

He just happens to lower it at the same rate it would be lowered if a dude in the drivers seat (conveniently out of frame mind) hit the down button on the control panel?

Also, while I don't know what kind of gaff tape he's using, I'm 99% sure it would take more effort than that to open a window the way he's doing it.
 
2023-01-24 8:33:49 AM  
And how much does it cost to replace the stripped gears in the window mechanism now?
 
2023-01-24 8:33:50 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:36:13 AM  
Why was I pulled over officer?
Possession of burglary tools, sir.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:37:54 AM  
And a sudden run on plunger sales.
 
2023-01-24 8:38:13 AM  

Mangoose: OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"

You do know that for, more or less, the same amount of money as the two plungers and the roll of painter's tape, you could buy an emergency escape hammer for your car and just go around smashing people's windows in.

Because no one wants to stand around for 5 minutes jimmying something when you could just smash and grab


ae01.alicdn.comView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:39:52 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: The fastest way to break into a car is to tap the back window with a pointed hammer. It's 100 times faster than this method and nobody reports it.


BB gun
 
2023-01-24 8:40:11 AM  

Fark_Guy_Rob: People who care about stealth just go around trying the door. Plenty of unlocked cars to steal from.

People who don't care will just smash the window.

There are plenty of other ways to open locked car doors. You think those tow truck drivers are all MIT grads? No. It's trivial to open locked car doors.


images.csmonitor.comView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:42:24 AM  

Fark_Guy_Rob: People who care about stealth just go around trying the door. Plenty of unlocked cars to steal from.

People who don't care will just smash the window.

There are plenty of other ways to open locked car doors. You think those tow truck drivers are all MIT grads? No. It's trivial to open locked car doors.


If your a tow truck driver this is just one more trick you can try.

Last time my keys were locked in my car I was at a small strip mall.  I went to a discount store and bought a barbecue spatula and went behind a dry cleaners and found a wire coat hanger.  Took about 2 minutes and I was in.
 
2023-01-24 8:42:33 AM  

WickerNipple: This was like when the cops came to school for DARE and told us how to buy and do drugs.


That was pretty great, tbh.  I found out cocaine is farkin awesome.  Weed is pretty great too.
 
2023-01-24 8:43:04 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 8:43:54 AM  

Teddy Brosevelt: WickerNipple: This was like when the cops came to school for DARE and told us how to buy and do drugs.

That was pretty great, tbh.  I found out cocaine is farkin awesome.  Weed is pretty great too.


I'll never forget how awesome they made lsd sound and they were right
 
2023-01-24 8:44:20 AM  

Mangoose: OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"

You do know that for, more or less, the same amount of money as the two plungers and the roll of painter's tape, you could buy an emergency escape hammer for your car and just go around smashing people's windows in.

Because no one wants to stand around for 5 minutes jimmying something when you could just smash and grab



Incorrect.

During the pandemic our town was hiat by a series of car robberies. They never BREAK the windows (presumably for fear of setting off the alarm) so they only take shiat from cars with open windows or that are left unlocked.

This would let them get in to locked cars without the alarm going off. Just slide down the window and reach in through the window.
 
2023-01-24 8:48:32 AM  
Here in St Louis burglars aren't wasting their time on some gimmicky BS like this. They just smash in a window and take anything they want and move on to the next car. The best thing you can do here is not leave anything (even if its not valuable) visible in the car. They don't normally bother breaking in windows on cars that don't at least have an obvious chance of making it worth their while.

Much like the restaurant business, car burglars need to have a high volume turn and burn mindset to make any money.

On the topic of the video, if you don't want to risk getting glass on the kid (a valid concern), you could just break in drivers side window and save some time.
 
2023-01-24 8:49:17 AM  

Maker_of_Roads: Ehhh, is nobody going to mention this is clearly fake?

He just happens to lower it at the same rate it would be lowered if a dude in the drivers seat (conveniently out of frame mind) hit the down button on the control panel?

Also, while I don't know what kind of gaff tape he's using, I'm 99% sure it would take more effort than that to open a window the way he's doing it.


Not that it isn't stupid, but the driver's side IS in the frame. You can see the driver's seat and out the driver's side window, so unless someone is crouched in the footwell, it's probably not faked.

Still an elaborate solution to a simple problem, though.
 
2023-01-24 8:49:31 AM  
I take my dog grocery shopping on seasonally correct days.  Cool and cloudy, or cold and sunny.  I leave the windows down four inches, so she can't escape, but gets enough air, and she can poke her nose out, see and smell what's happening around her.  Then I unlock all four doors in case some brainless do-gooder decides they need to break in and rescue her.  If it's remotely warm, she stays at home.

Anyone who leaves a child unattended in a locked car should have a window broken quickly and efficiently.

People notice a child in a hot parking lot, they aren't going to take 10 to 30 minutes to run over to the local hardware store for plungers and tape, or muck around with such nonsense.  They're going to grab the tire iron from the nearest trunk and smash out the window farthest from the child.

This plunger nonsense, seems more like an instructional video on how cops plant evidence. Cops hate rights to privacy for the public, such as locked vehicles, phones, homes.  They want stop and frisk to extend to every aspect of society.

Now society/manufacturers will have to adapt again, and find some other way to bypass this method with mechanical stops to find someway to protect themselves from stealthy criminals.  The followup story will be someone getting arrested with having a plunger in their home as a burglary tool.
 
2023-01-24 8:50:40 AM  
If I see a kid or a dog in a locked car I'm not wasting all that time when I'm sure I can find a good brick a lot quicker.
 
2023-01-24 8:51:41 AM  

Ker_Thwap: People notice a child in a hot parking lot, they aren't going to take 10 to 30 minutes to run over to the local hardware store for plungers and tape, or muck around with such nonsense.  They're going to grab the tire iron from the nearest trunk and smash out the window farthest from the child.



then rescue the baby, then break the remaining windows.
 
2023-01-24 8:59:12 AM  
Plungers now on the list of "criminal tools."
 
2023-01-24 8:59:39 AM  
i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 9:00:38 AM  

OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"


Ain't no petty thief or car thief that's gonna want to spend that much time obviously farking around to get into a car - they'll just break the damn window.  Hanging around drawing attention to yourself is not your friend when you're doing illegal shiat.  Even the meth casualties know that one, 'cause the ones that don't end up spending large portions of their lives in county.  Longer you're there, more likely you'll get caught.  Get it done fast and they'll still be scratching their heads wondering if they should call the cops or what when you're already out of there
 
2023-01-24 9:01:15 AM  

OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"


No criminal is taking that much time to get into a car when they can just break a window.
 
2023-01-24 9:01:26 AM  

Ethertap: Here in St Louis burglars aren't wasting their time on some gimmicky BS like this. They just smash in a window and take anything they want and move on to the next car. The best thing you can do here is not leave anything (even if its not valuable) visible in the car. They don't normally bother breaking in windows on cars that don't at least have an obvious chance of making it worth their while.

Much like the restaurant business, car burglars need to have a high volume turn and burn mindset to make any money.

On the topic of the video, if you don't want to risk getting glass on the kid (a valid concern), you could just break in drivers side window and save some time.


It's also amazing how many times a couple of invisible laptops were left in vehicles that had been broken into.
 
2023-01-24 9:03:12 AM  

Maker_of_Roads: Ehhh, is nobody going to mention this is clearly fake?

He just happens to lower it at the same rate it would be lowered if a dude in the drivers seat (conveniently out of frame mind) hit the down button on the control panel?

Also, while I don't know what kind of gaff tape he's using, I'm 99% sure it would take more effort than that to open a window the way he's doing it.


It looks like blue painters tape.
 
2023-01-24 9:03:39 AM  

DO NOT WANT Poster Girl: The fastest way to break into a car is to tap the back window with a pointed hammer. It's 100 times faster than this method and nobody reports it.


Dead serious with this question...is this why I commonly see that tiny back window on cars obviously smashed but then have some cheap cover like tape or cardboard covering the hole because they were too poor to replace the window ? I just always assumed it was due to someone getting locked out of their car and not having the foresight to have made a spare key they store outside their vehicle.
 
2023-01-24 9:07:56 AM  
Buy two plungers before you need two plungers.
 
2023-01-24 9:11:43 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 9:14:15 AM  
how to kidnap a dead baby.
 
2023-01-24 9:19:07 AM  

SpectroBoy: Mangoose: OldRod: "Here, let me show you how to commit a crime!"

You do know that for, more or less, the same amount of money as the two plungers and the roll of painter's tape, you could buy an emergency escape hammer for your car and just go around smashing people's windows in.

Because no one wants to stand around for 5 minutes jimmying something when you could just smash and grab


Incorrect.

During the pandemic our town was hiat by a series of car robberies. They never BREAK the windows (presumably for fear of setting off the alarm) so they only take shiat from cars with open windows or that are left unlocked.

This would let them get in to locked cars without the alarm going off. Just slide down the window and reach in through the window.


Might just be the difference between a small town and a city of millions? No one blinks at a car alarm except to roll their eyes and groan "who's the farking idiot with a car alarm?"
 
2023-01-24 9:20:09 AM  
Or break the farkin back window and open that one.   Somebody that leaves a kid in a car like that deserves the repair bill.
 
2023-01-24 9:20:56 AM  
You can thank the police for what is sure to be the next Tik-Tok challenge.
 
2023-01-24 9:21:11 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-24 9:22:23 AM  

offacue: Ethertap: Here in St Louis burglars aren't wasting their time on some gimmicky BS like this. They just smash in a window and take anything they want and move on to the next car. The best thing you can do here is not leave anything (even if its not valuable) visible in the car. They don't normally bother breaking in windows on cars that don't at least have an obvious chance of making it worth their while.

Much like the restaurant business, car burglars need to have a high volume turn and burn mindset to make any money.

On the topic of the video, if you don't want to risk getting glass on the kid (a valid concern), you could just break in drivers side window and save some time.

It's also amazing how many times a couple of invisible laptops were left in vehicles that had been broken into.


As far as my insurance company knows all 11 of my macbooks got stolen from the back of my car a few weeks ago. Now I can take it easy for a while.
 
2023-01-24 9:22:23 AM  
Buy two plungers before you need two plungers.
 
Displayed 50 of 119 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.