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(Axios)   Although he's guilty, Sam Bankman-Fried pleads not guilty   (axios.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Plea, Finance, federal court, Ex-Alameda Research CEO Caroline Ellison, guilty last month, Federal prosecutors, early November, meteoric rise  
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1649 clicks; posted to Main » and Business » on 03 Jan 2023 at 3:00 PM (10 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



34 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2023-01-03 3:11:13 PM  
Oh smitty... you always plead Not Guilty at your arraignment. Always.

/unless, of course, you have a deal in place with the prosecution, negotiated with the assistance of counsel
 
2023-01-03 3:11:59 PM  
Relax, he's got an angle...
 
2023-01-03 3:14:19 PM  
Unless you've got a plea deal, why the fark would you do anything but plead not guilty?
 
2023-01-03 3:19:24 PM  
I wasn't trying to defraud anyone. I just fell into this really big fraud trap that I set for myself.

Stupid me.
 
2023-01-03 3:43:13 PM  
Maybe, with his hairdo, he's working on the Phil Spector defense.
 
2023-01-03 3:47:00 PM  
Is this the LoTR character we're talking about?
 
2023-01-03 3:56:35 PM  
Pappy Bankman is a headshrinker as well as a lawyer.  If he were a chiropractor too he'd pretty much hit a quackery trifecta. Little Sammy will be A-OK, eventually, in prison.
 
2023-01-03 4:00:22 PM  
This headline... I like it!
 
2023-01-03 4:05:30 PM  
By reason of temporary coinsanity!
 
2023-01-03 4:07:43 PM  

fragMasterFlash: Relax, he's got an angle...


Except for that time he sold dope disguised as a nun.
 
2023-01-03 4:19:04 PM  
Well can't wait to hear his defense.
 
2023-01-03 4:29:10 PM  

groppet: Well can't wait to hear his defense.


"I f*cked up".
 
2023-01-03 4:49:10 PM  
Of course, until the trial is over, none of us can truly know whether he is innocent or guilty. But there is one thing we do know:

He's guilty.

i.ytimg.comView Full Size
 
2023-01-03 4:50:00 PM  

groppet: Well can't wait to hear his defense.


"Do you know who my dad is??"
 
2023-01-03 5:08:16 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

/iknow
 
2023-01-03 5:10:23 PM  
So when he's found guilty at trial, is he also guilty of perjury for saying that he's not guilty?
 
2023-01-03 5:56:57 PM  

Tom Marvolo Bombadil: [Fark user image 388x700]
/iknow


Mmm... bolt on steaks.
 
2023-01-03 6:31:03 PM  
Guilty of running a ponzi scheme on top of a ponzi scheme. It's a ponzi scheme stack.
 
2023-01-03 6:42:48 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-03 8:27:28 PM  

Bishop of Southfark: So when he's found guilty at trial, is he also guilty of perjury for saying that he's not guilty?


It's the fark way.  If you are a fark-villain, then trials are unnecessary as you are guilty and saying otherwise is only compounding your guilt.

Just like how you can tell if someone is a witch and should be burned at the stake by whether they deny being a witch.

FWIW I'd be amazed if Bankman-Fried isn't guilty as fark, however.
 
2023-01-03 9:43:54 PM  
I'm so sick of seeing this goofy crypto bro and hearing about his scammy crypto scam which runs in the billions.

And I've still not read one single story about this sad excuse for a human.

Go DIAF, scammeister.

///too soon?
 
2023-01-03 9:49:09 PM  
Jesus Farking Christ, subby. How goddamn stupid can you be?
 
2023-01-03 9:50:20 PM  

princhester: Bishop of Southfark: So when he's found guilty at trial, is he also guilty of perjury for saying that he's not guilty?

It's the fark way.  If you are a fark-villain, then trials are unnecessary as you are guilty and saying otherwise is only compounding your guilt.

Just like how you can tell if someone is a witch and should be burned at the stake by whether they deny being a witch.

FWIW I'd be amazed if Bankman-Fried isn't guilty as fark, however.


Yeah, presumption of innocence isn't a ting at Fark unless it's a person of color, and then they were wrongly convicted if they are found guilty.
 
2023-01-03 9:56:09 PM  

Mikey1969: princhester: Bishop of Southfark: So when he's found guilty at trial, is he also guilty of perjury for saying that he's not guilty?

It's the fark way.  If you are a fark-villain, then trials are unnecessary as you are guilty and saying otherwise is only compounding your guilt.

Just like how you can tell if someone is a witch and should be burned at the stake by whether they deny being a witch.

FWIW I'd be amazed if Bankman-Fried isn't guilty as fark, however.

Yeah, presumption of innocence isn't a ting at Fark unless it's a person of color, and then they were wrongly convicted if they are found guilty.


Fark ain't a court of law and we're perfectly free to draw our own conclusions.
 
2023-01-03 10:02:33 PM  

pueblonative: Fark ain't a court of law and we're perfectly free to draw our own conclusions.


I appreciate the headline and the post to which I was responding were (probably) tongue in cheek to some extent.  But there is a substantial distinction between concluding an accused is guilty, and dissing an accused for even daring to have a contrary position.
 
2023-01-03 10:10:03 PM  
The man, from a legal standpoint at least, is innocent till proven guilty in a court of law.

Does he feel guilty? I doubt it. In his heart of hearts he most likely believes that all this is someone else's fault, he's the victim here, and his counsel will somehow "get him off."

Is it a fair cop? The court will be the judge of that. The People (on the advice of their counsel, who have examined the evidence against him) clearly have concluded it very well might be.

We'll see.
 
2023-01-03 11:04:05 PM  
Pleading Not Guilty now does not preclude him from changing his plea to guilty later in a plea bargain.  This is just how it works.
 
2023-01-03 11:04:25 PM  
I wonder what the movie will be like?  There's real potential if the writers don't stick too close to reality, more Blow than The Irishman.
 
2023-01-04 12:08:15 AM  

groppet: Well can't wait to hear his defense.


"Everyone Else was syphoning money off the company, not me. All those properties I bought, politicians I bribed, crypto i bought was all just my bonus. And pay no attention to that $1.8 billion dollar check I cut for myself."
 
2023-01-04 12:15:56 AM  

SimonElectric: Guilty of running a ponzi scheme on top of a ponzi scheme. It's a ponzi scheme stack.


How many times do we have to say this? It was straight up fraud. He just took the money. Ponzi scheme involve pretending there is a payback to some people.
 
2023-01-04 12:30:47 AM  

Don't Lag Me Bro: SimonElectric: Guilty of running a ponzi scheme on top of a ponzi scheme. It's a ponzi scheme stack.

How many times do we have to say this? It was straight up fraud. He just took the money. Ponzi scheme involve pretending there is a payback to some people.


Yeah I don't get why people are so invested in the idea it was a Ponzi.  I suggested it wasn't a Ponzi on reddit and got downvoted to hell.
 
2023-01-04 12:41:55 AM  
Bernie Madoff went with "guilty" to be safe in prison. He stole millions from the mob and wanted to keep breathing.

Mini-Madoff did the same thing with the mob and assorted drug dealers and other underworld types.  He's a dead man walking.
 
2023-01-04 5:51:17 AM  

gameshowhost: groppet: Well can't wait to hear his defense.

"Do you know who my dad is??"


"He owns a dealership"
 
2023-01-04 1:57:28 PM  
Pro Tip: When committing white-collar crime, always stash enough away someplace safe to bribe a judge.

SBF failed to do this.
 
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