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(Twitter)   Voting is on for the worst legal take on Twitter for 2022. Follow thread for the contestants. Anyone stupid enough to defend them in the comments will get a free GED in Law   (twitter.com) divider line
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3504 clicks; posted to Politics » on 01 Jan 2023 at 4:26 PM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



66 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2023-01-01 12:50:57 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2023-01-01 1:13:04 PM  
I'm being contrarian and giving one of the best legal takes.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-01 2:00:59 PM  
The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.
 
2023-01-01 2:06:29 PM  
I voted for number one.

Don't Talk to the Police
Youtube d-7o9xYp7eE
 
2023-01-01 2:48:52 PM  

wademh: I'm being contrarian and giving one of the best legal takes.

[Fark user image 463x295]


Has anything happened with that yet?

If not, it's not one of the best legal takes.
 
2023-01-01 3:05:44 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.
 
2023-01-01 3:09:57 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Can't begin to guess how many Smarts I've gotten after sarcastically posting a version of this one in Pol tab threads.
 
2023-01-01 3:13:38 PM  

Naido: [Fark user image image 425x305]

Can't begin to guess how many Smarts I've gotten after sarcastically posting a version of this one in Pol tab threads.


Forgot to mention: got a bunch of smart votes by saying that the founding fathers only came up with this one because they'd all committed a bunch of crimes.
 
2023-01-01 3:57:19 PM  

Nintenfreak: [Fark user image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.


I don't know what "legal percussion" is, but I'm guessing doesn't include playing the bodhran.
 
2023-01-01 4:33:40 PM  

Naido: [Fark user image image 425x305]

Can't begin to guess how many Smarts I've gotten after sarcastically posting a version of this one in Pol tab threads.


I tried to search for the quote from a Supreme Court decision, but here is my paraphrase:

The 5th amendment protects the innocent man from being caught up in government investigations because a truthful statement can be used against you evidence of a crime.

Saying innocent people don't need to plea the fif is a massive misunderstanding. Arguably, jailing innocent people is the worst offense on the list.
 
2023-01-01 4:36:11 PM  
So, I have to click four Twitter links to view the takes, make a Twitter account, then click a fifth link to vote?  Pass.
 
2023-01-01 4:36:24 PM  
Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?
 
2023-01-01 4:37:22 PM  

HighOnCraic: Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?


That's not bad, did you count the cartridges hiatting the floor?
 
2023-01-01 4:38:31 PM  

Xcott: Nintenfreak: [Fark user image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.

I don't know what "legal percussion" is, but I'm guessing doesn't include playing the bodhran.


Not in those clothes, no.
 
2023-01-01 4:40:00 PM  

Naido: [Fark user image image 425x305]

Can't begin to guess how many Smarts I've gotten after sarcastically posting a version of this one in Pol tab threads.


Thing about smart votes, never sure on what level the person is thinking.
 
2023-01-01 4:40:42 PM  
Bah Gawd King, that's 1A's music!
 
2023-01-01 4:44:50 PM  

Nintenfreak: [Fark user image image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.


If it really did work like that....all you'd have to do is tell the person who put it up what your wage was. They'd have to write themselves up...

/ or they'd call legal or upper management and get told what an idiot they are
 
2023-01-01 4:46:04 PM  

Xcott: Nintenfreak: [Fark user image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.

I don't know what "legal percussion" is, but I'm guessing doesn't include playing the bodhran.


Using a judge's gavel to play a cowbell?
 
2023-01-01 4:46:46 PM  
Bah! The worst legal take was when the Mods posted the Canadian copyright extension on the Entertainment tab but not the Poltab, so I didn't hear about it until today. Who goes to the Enttab for legal news?!

Once again, Donald Trump wins everything on the table, this time with the USMCA. And yet Americans keep claiming he is a loser, which is farking weird, considering that guy continues to get everything he wants. Even Canada's Justice Minister was very unhappy about the extension, but the Biden DoJ and State Dept did nothing to say, "Hey, that was  Trump farkup, let it go, we won't enforce it." Sad, low energy, Biden. :(

Meanwhile, Canadians continue to ignore that our sovereignty is just mostly a subsidiary of Disney. At least Sidewalk Labs got their asses kicked back to Fresno or wherever they live.
 
2023-01-01 4:48:08 PM  

foo monkey: So, I have to click four Twitter links to view the takes, make a Twitter account, then click a fifth link to vote?  Pass.


Uhh, no? It's just one thread with a poll in the first tweet.
 
2023-01-01 4:50:58 PM  

HighOnCraic: Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?


If you have a third statistical you should probably see a doctor.

/no, the one in the middle shouldn't be there
 
2023-01-01 4:51:35 PM  

Irving Maimway: The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.


The FA is a clusterfark, and anyone who follows American news is bound to be confused. As well as anyone who sees what American lawyers submit and American judges allow to be argued in court. I think anybody who is confused by the FA is just a reasonable person. Well, that, and nobody except legal theorists wants to talk about individual clauses of the FA. Not even lawyers speak of individual clauses when they talk to the media, which really helps to confuse the public.

The FA is more than just a precdent of travesties. The FA is also a travesty of a legacy of failures of PLE (Public Legal Education). It's as if the Bar Associations want deliberate Public Legal Obfuscation on the 1st.
 
2023-01-01 4:51:57 PM  

Gyrfalcon: HighOnCraic: Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?

That's not bad, did you count the cartridges hiatting the floor?


Wasn't the cartridges guy the same poster with the three statisticals? It has been such a long time, and I've been traveling...
 
2023-01-01 4:52:36 PM  
All of the above.
 
2023-01-01 4:54:04 PM  

Nintenfreak: [Fark user image image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.


That one wins. The innocent people / fifth amendment candidates split votes since they're the same thing. And the first amendment one loses because the replies are kinda dumb and go too far, trying to say that the first amendment protects all speech from any censorship rather than from government censorship.
 
2023-01-01 4:57:30 PM  

NINEv2: HighOnCraic: Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?

If you have a third statistical you should probably see a doctor.

/no, the one in the middle shouldn't be there


You guys are gonna be SO pissed!

/This is bad news.
//For OBAMA!
 
2023-01-01 5:13:16 PM  

iheartscotch: Nintenfreak: [Fark user image image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.

If it really did work like that....all you'd have to do is tell the person who put it up what your wage was. They'd have to write themselves up...

/ or they'd call legal or upper management and get told what an idiot they are


It's likely upper management are the ones that posted it.
 
2023-01-01 5:14:03 PM  

NobleHam: foo monkey: So, I have to click four Twitter links to view the takes, make a Twitter account, then click a fifth link to vote?  Pass.

Uhh, no? It's just one thread with a poll in the first tweet.


Ugh, so I have to learn how to use Twitter?  That's almost worse.
 
2023-01-01 5:16:08 PM  

Bennie Crabtree: Irving Maimway: The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.

The FA is a clusterfark, and anyone who follows American news is bound to be confused. As well as anyone who sees what American lawyers submit and American judges allow to be argued in court. I think anybody who is confused by the FA is just a reasonable person. Well, that, and nobody except legal theorists wants to talk about individual clauses of the FA. Not even lawyers speak of individual clauses when they talk to the media, which really helps to confuse the public.

The FA is more than just a precdent of travesties. The FA is also a travesty of a legacy of failures of PLE (Public Legal Education). It's as if the Bar Associations want deliberate Public Legal Obfuscation on the 1st.


As far as I can tell, the FA means that political groups can take money from anywhere, including foreign entities, and that conservative Christians get to impose their beliefs on everyone else.
 
2023-01-01 5:17:35 PM  
I'd like a free GED in law, and so, will defend the First Amendment.

I think the First Amendment is the winner because free speech is important, religious freedom is important, and the other stuff. So, I voted for that one. No, I didn't read the Twitter thread to learn the details. I don't need to read any of that before voting to know what's important.
 
2023-01-01 5:25:37 PM  
Ignoring public opinion is one thing, and certainly defensible in some circumstances.  Ignoring the Constitution is quite another.
 
2023-01-01 5:26:25 PM  

HighOnCraic: Gyrfalcon: HighOnCraic: Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?

That's not bad, did you count the cartridges hiatting the floor?

Wasn't the cartridges guy the same poster with the three statisticals? It has been such a long time, and I've been traveling...


I thought statisticals was someone else. Perhaps I'm being too narrow-minded...
 
2023-01-01 5:29:53 PM  
The "attention" one for me. Because the notice 'to subordinates' was written down and signed in full violation of the law and was smacked down so hard his momma got hurt

That person should be banned from a position of authority as long as he lives

The first amendment stuff is just a stupid thing said on twitter like 99% of it
 
2023-01-01 5:34:21 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Bennie Crabtree: Irving Maimway: The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.

The FA is a clusterfark, and anyone who follows American news is bound to be confused. As well as anyone who sees what American lawyers submit and American judges allow to be argued in court. I think anybody who is confused by the FA is just a reasonable person. Well, that, and nobody except legal theorists wants to talk about individual clauses of the FA. Not even lawyers speak of individual clauses when they talk to the media, which really helps to confuse the public.

The FA is more than just a precdent of travesties. The FA is also a travesty of a legacy of failures of PLE (Public Legal Education). It's as if the Bar Associations want deliberate Public Legal Obfuscation on the 1st.

As far as I can tell, the FA means that political groups can take money from anywhere, including foreign entities, and that conservative Christians get to impose their beliefs on everyone else.


No no no.

What you are talking about, in legal terms, is referred to as reality.

What the FA refers to is "how much money you got?" In legal terms.
 
2023-01-01 5:55:07 PM  

Nintenfreak: [Fark user image image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.


Under the National Labor Relations Act (NLRA or the Act), employees have the right to communicate with other employees at their workplace about their wages.  Wages are a vital term and condition of employment, and discussions of wages are often preliminary to organizing or other actions for mutual aid or protection.
If you are an employee covered by the Act, you may discuss wages in face-to-face conversations and written messages.  When using electronic communications, like social media, keep in mind that your employer may have policies against using their equipment.  However, policies that specifically prohibit the discussion of wages are unlawful.
You may have discussions about wages when not at work, when you are on break, and even during work if employees are permitted to have other non-work conversations.  You have these rights whether or not you are represented by a union.
Protected conversations about wages may take on many forms, including having conversations about how much you and your colleagues and managers make, presenting joint requests concerning pay to your employer; organizing a union to raise your wages; approaching an outside union for help in bargaining with your employer over pay; and approaching the National Labor Relations Board for more information on your rights under the NLRA.
In addition, you have the right to discuss and engage in outside activity with other employees concerning public issues that clearly may affect your wages - for example, minimum wage or right-to-work laws.   You may also discuss supporting employees who work elsewhere.
You also have the right not to engage in conversations or communications about your wages.
When you and another employee have a conversation or communication about your pay, it is unlawful for your employer to punish or retaliate against you in any way for having that conversation.  It is also unlawful for your employer to interrogate you about the conversation, threaten you for having it, or put you under surveillance for such conversations.  Additionally, it is unlawful for the employer to have a work rule, policy, or hiring agreement that prohibits employees from discussing their wages with each other or that requires you to get the employer's permission to have such discussions.  If your employer does any of these things, a charge may be filed against the employer with the NLRB.
 
2023-01-01 6:03:25 PM  
Wow, tough call.
 
2023-01-01 6:08:06 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Bennie Crabtree: Irving Maimway: The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.

The FA is a clusterfark, and anyone who follows American news is bound to be confused. As well as anyone who sees what American lawyers submit and American judges allow to be argued in court. I think anybody who is confused by the FA is just a reasonable person. Well, that, and nobody except legal theorists wants to talk about individual clauses of the FA. Not even lawyers speak of individual clauses when they talk to the media, which really helps to confuse the public.

The FA is more than just a precdent of travesties. The FA is also a travesty of a legacy of failures of PLE (Public Legal Education). It's as if the Bar Associations want deliberate Public Legal Obfuscation on the 1st.

As far as I can tell, the FA means that political groups can take money from anywhere, including foreign entities, and that conservative Christians get to impose their beliefs on everyone else.


The big problem with the First is that covers three different topics that are often at odds with each other (speech, religion, and assembly). And because of the conflicts, judges and lawyers have been able to build a Rube Goldberg set of precedents to force reconciliation. 

Take religion for example. The purpose of this clause is to prevent a State Sponsored church (sorry, Evangelicals). The government doesn't interfere with church operations and vice versa. How it got morphed into a tax exemption is murky, but it happened. The US could have easily put the Episcopal Church as the official religion, but that didn't happen.
 
2023-01-01 6:14:26 PM  

HighOnCraic: Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?


No need for a thesis.  The GED is free but if you want diploma and/or cap and gown then you will need to know how to write a check (or some other financial instrument) payable to Fark. Drew has pay for his beer somehow.
 
2023-01-01 6:14:27 PM  

Nintenfreak: [Fark user image image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.


The lack of legal percussion just makes it disappointing.

Everything is made better by using lawyers as drums.
 
2023-01-01 6:22:01 PM  

Xcott: Nintenfreak: [Fark user image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.

I don't know what "legal percussion" is, but I'm guessing doesn't include playing the bodhran.


Law & Order: Sound Effect
Youtube -8lDYrvTILc
 
2023-01-01 6:22:20 PM  

foo monkey: So, I have to click four Twitter links to view the takes, make a Twitter account, then click a fifth link to vote?  Pass.


So much this! It's a farking Twitter scavenger hunt.
 
2023-01-01 6:22:38 PM  
If I had a Twitter account, I'd vote for "Attention".

The other three are just stupid people being stupid on Twitter. The Attention one will (hopefully) end up actually costing that company in a very tangible way.
 
2023-01-01 6:23:39 PM  
Forgive me, I'm a bit slow and Australian so can some one please explain how the first Amendment works? I know it does protect free speech to a degree, but there is also ways that it doesn't such as the fire in a theatre.
 
2023-01-01 6:32:18 PM  
So I know this RW asshole (actually he's probably a nazi. seriously) who had the 2nd amendment tattooed on his leg.  I told him I'd be more impressed if he had a 3rd amendment tattoo.
 
2023-01-01 6:33:49 PM  

foo monkey: So, I have to click four Twitter links to view the takes, make a Twitter account, then click a fifth link to vote?  Pass.


Or, you could click the one Twitter link on Fark, scroll down to read the four contestants, chuckle sensibly and move on with your life
 
2023-01-01 6:49:45 PM  

AnotherAussiefarker: Forgive me, I'm a bit slow and Australian so can some one please explain how the first Amendment works? I know it does protect free speech to a degree, but there is also ways that it doesn't such as the fire in a theatre.


The fire in theaters bit is a myth. The "fire" was actually publicly disagreeing with the government's war policy. The case was overturned a half century ago and the comment was only dicta anyways.
 
2023-01-01 7:03:39 PM  

TheMysteriousStranger: HighOnCraic: Does that GED in law come with a gown and a very narrow cap?

Can the thesis be written by hand, or do I need to have my wife type it up for me?

Can the competitors be people who are new to Twitter threads, or do they need to be vets?

Is it time to defund the police yet, or can I just ask them, politely, to stop arresting me?

Do I need to cite at least three statisticals?

No need for a thesis.  The GED is free but if you want diploma and/or cap and gown then you will need to know how to write a check (or some other financial instrument) payable to Fark. Drew has pay for his beer somehow.


I'm pretty sure the first amendment permits me to advertise here selling diplomas and caps for half the cost of whatever this website charges for them.
 
2023-01-01 7:04:21 PM  

AnotherAussiefarker: Forgive me, I'm a bit slow and Australian so can some one please explain how the first Amendment works? I know it does protect free speech to a degree, but there is also ways that it doesn't such as the fire in a theatre.


G'day mate! Obviously also Australian but a long-time self-taught scholar of the US political and judicial system. The First Amdendment is pretty simple, it says that US governments can't take action against people for expressing their ideas freely, also prevents US governments from establishing or favouring religions over other religions.

The much longer explanation is about what the First Amendment is NOT. It doesn't protect free speech from its own natural consequences. So if you use free speech to defame somebody, you can't claim First Amendment protection when they launch defamation proceedings. Alex Jones keeps bleating about "free speech" in the wake of his getting sued for around a billion dollars for his defamatory lies, proving that he just can't stop lying. The First Amendment also won't save you for speaking about classified or otherwise protected information (eg health records), inciting crimes, the "yelling 'fire' in a crowded theater" situation you've already referenced, contempt of court etc.

The First Amendment only restricts governments. It can't stop private entities like social media websites taking down your posts or giving you a time-out, it can't stop audiences boycotting you for saying dumb things, it doesn't mean you can't be called out for the terribleness of your freely spoken ideas.

There are very few actual cases of First Amendment breaches, most of the time you see people referencing their First Amendment rights it's a case of them not understanding how the First Amendment works and complaining about being blocked on Twitter or something dumb like that.

We don't have expressly codified rights in Australia but we have implied rights, and the right to political expression has been confirmed by our High Court. So in that sense the US's First Amendment is not vastly different to our situation here. The only controversial case which comes to my mind is that of Albert Langer who was briefly jailed for contempt of court when he didn't dessist from promoting his ideas about preferential voting back in the early 90's, that was a case which never could have happened in the US.

Hope that helps.
 
2023-01-01 7:34:14 PM  

Bennie Crabtree: Irving Maimway: The First Amendment one got the biggest laugh from me.

The FA is a clusterfark, and anyone who follows American news is bound to be confused. As well as anyone who sees what American lawyers submit and American judges allow to be argued in court. I think anybody who is confused by the FA is just a reasonable person. Well, that, and nobody except legal theorists wants to talk about individual clauses of the FA. Not even lawyers speak of individual clauses when they talk to the media, which really helps to confuse the public.

The FA is more than just a precdent of travesties. The FA is also a travesty of a legacy of failures of PLE (Public Legal Education). It's as if the Bar Associations want deliberate Public Legal Obfuscation on the 1st.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2023-01-01 7:40:28 PM  

Xcott: Nintenfreak: [Fark user image 425x425] that the person who made this note is still alive is an indictment of the human species.

I don't know what "legal percussion" is, but I'm guessing doesn't include playing the bodhran.


I think it's the drummer from the Police.
 
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